Disclaimer: I do not own the characters from GW.



_word_ = italics/thoughts



Dear Love,

That's right. Love. Trowa, I've always loved you and now I can't even tell you in person. Why the hell did you hafta leave us so quickly? I mean, I never thought that I'd be reduced to writing a letter to you. I never planned on confessing my feelings on a stupid piece of paper that you could just easily crumple up anyway. Even if you would have hated me or told me that you didn't return the feelings I'd at least get to see your reaction. I mean, I don't know what I mean.

I miss you. We all do. You were our friend Trowa. Our good friend. We don't have many people left anymore. Nobody that really understands. And you gave us no warning as to why you just took off! You were there one minute and POOF you were gone the next! Why the hell couldn't you think of our feelings before you just left us? We were in the middle of a battle you moron!

I know why you left. Surprised? I wouldn't be. You thought nobody cared about you that we'd be better off with out you. Well ya know what? You were wrong buddy! WAY wrong! Quatre got captured and Heero had to self detonate. I took your advice though and I clipped his cables so he didn't blow up. But that didn't help Quatre.

They hurt him Trowa. I mean, REALLY "HURT" him. Wanna know who did it? Zechs. Yep, ol' Zechsy finally got back at Quatre for breaking up with him. He beat Quatre first hand and then took his innocence from him. HE TOOK HIS INNOCENCE Trowa! That was the only thing Quatre had left after you disappeared. How do I know all of this? I was captured too. So was Heero. Zechs knew about Quatre and Heero and to get back at them both he did something so despicable and degrading that I shall not hold Heero back next time we see that fucking pig.

He made us watch.

That fucking bastard MADE US WATCH! He made Quatre do the most embarrassing things. Zechs made him beg for it. BEG FOR IT! What kind of human being makes someone beg to be manipulated and then violated? Then, when Zechs was finished with Quatre he handed him to a guard and told him to do whatever to 'the blonde one' because 'he was useless'. You wanna know the scary thing? Quatre believed him. He believed Zechs when he said he was useless and easy and a slut and everything else that that asshole said about him. It wasn't fair to Quatre about what Zechs did and it wasn't fair for you to leave him either! Cat doesn't talk to me or to Heero and hell will freeze over before he talks to Justice Man about a rape by another guy. He needs to talk to YOU! So where the hell are you?

Heero needs you too. Hard to believe that the perfect soldier needs someone besides his Gundam. But low and behold! He keeps asking about you in his sleep. You got under his skin. Not like I did. I just annoy the hell out of him all the time. He actually respected you. Nobody else has ever had the pleasure.

Wufei thinks it was injustice. He never specifies what but I have my own beliefs. YOU ARE A MORON! HOW CAN YOU BE SO STUPID AS TO JUST LEAVE US?! I want to know Trowa! Was there something more important to you than your friends? How could you think that we didn't care?.that.I didn't care. I've cared, I've always cared. I may claim to be Shinigami, God of Death, bringer of darkness and destroyer of life. But I cared. Especially about you. Why couldn't you see that? Even QUATRE RABARBA WINNER saw THAT!! Why couldn't you?

I have a heart and it has been yours for a long time. I don't know exactly, but does that really matter? You're gone, you're never coming back, right? I mean, if you were going to come back then you'd have come back already. You've been gone too long.

The war's over. Did you know that? Have you been fighting somewhere else? And if you were, were you fighting with us or against us? I hope it was with us Tro, that way we could have still been on the same side. I know I said it before, but I miss you.

Heero's the one that told me to write to you, hoping to get my feelings down on paper where even I could understand them and see them in print. Well, he didn't tell me to write to YOU exactly, he just told me to clear my mind, and start writing a letter. I was going to start it out to Relena, but she's actually a pretty nice person once you get to know her.though I still have a grudge against her giving Q a black eye for taking 'her' Heero away from her. But some how, it ended up to you.

As Wufei keeps saying, death should understand death. Why'd you have to die and leave us Trowa? Why did you leave me? I loved you. I still love you. I'll always love you.

All my love,

Duo Maxwell

Ex-Gundam 02 Deathscythe

Duo looked at the paper in his hands, rereading his angry words. A hand on his shoulder made him look up. He looked beside him, into the blue eyes of the pilot of Sandrock, behind him was the Wing pilot and on his other side was Nataku's pilot. Duo gave the blonde a reassuring look, then folded the paper and placed it in the bouquet of flowers set in front of the grave, honoring their friend.

He nodded to his friends, and they slowly walked away from the sight.

The wind gently blew the flowers, shifting the envelope, exposing the messy scrawl that had been carefully printed on the front.

To Heaven:

I gave you my angel, but not for keeps. One day, I'll be back for what's mine.

Shinigami



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