The actual story is now beginning!

The characters are by Terry Pratchett, and Josh Whedon.

"REG SHOE?" A voice like gravestones closing asked.

"Yes?" Reg replied. He was busy thinking of new, catchy slogans for his undead person movement.

"YOU ARE GIVEN A ONCE IN A LIFETIME OPPURTUNITY TO TRAVEL TO ANOTHER DIMENSION TO SPREAD YOUR BELIEVES."

"That's nice." Reg said, not really paying attention, but then it dawned to him. "Wait a sec, different dimension? To
educate the undead of other world?"

"UHM, YES, I SUPPOSE YOU COULD CALL IT THAT. YOU WILL BE SEND TO EARTH, TO A PLACE CALLED SUNNYDALE. THERE ARE MANY
VAMPIRES AND OTHER SORTS OF UNDEAD THERE, SO YOU WON'T BE BORED." The voice, belonging to Death answered.

"That would be very good, but how about my work here? Surely these doomed souls need to be educated as well." Reg said,
not wanting to leave his new members standing in the cold. Seeing as he was in Hell, that would be rather difficult.

"AH. WELL, I'M SURE THAT WILL BE TAKEN CARE OFF." Death crossed his fingers behind his back. This zombie had caused a lot of
problems in the netherregeins. Getting the souls to go on a strike, handing out folders. A lot of demons had been
complaining, and Death had given in. He would send this Reg to a different dimension, so it wouldn't be any of his business
anymore.

"Well, if you put it that way, I don't see why I shouldn't go and enlighten those poor people!
What are you waiting for? Go on, zap me there." Reg ordered. Death snapped his fingers, and Reg awoke on a cemetery.

The next morning he had found a small abandoned shed for him to live in, and a bucket of paint, with a brush, he had found
on the streets. "Am I glad I thought om some slogans, now I can start immediately." He thought, picking up the pain and the
brush and walked away, to look for a nice wall to cover.

Buffy, on her way to the Magic Shop, passed a weird looking graffiti slogan. Instead of the usual brightly colored drawings,
this looked painted on, with dark red paint. "Undead yes, unperson no!" She read aloud. "People get weirder and weirder
everyday." And continued on her way.

That night, while vampires stalked through the darkness, they were accosted by a strange smelling man, who pressed folders
in their hands. "Undeads have rights to!" The man said, and left quickly after that. Some vampires read the folder, and
found it amusing. The man believed vampires, boogeyman and others had the same rights as humans, and encouraged them to
come to a special meeting, in three days. Others tried to eat the folders. Others tried to eat the man. Those failed. A few
were interested, and decided to go to the meeting. One of the vampires got staked by Buffy, who picked up the folder, and
dismissed it as some freaky Goth party.

10 vampires turned up at the meeting, and Reg was pleased. "My dear brethren! Aren't we all equal? Don't we all breathe?"
He started. One vampire raised his hand. "Yes, brother Guz?"

"Uhm, I don't actually breathe, mister Shoe."

"Please, call me brother Reg. But surely you CAN breathe, we all have lungs, a heart, a decent set of brains! We are very
civilised, but humans see us as monsters, who can't control their hunger! Well, I say, that's all stereotyping. And I
promise you, my fellow brethren, that there will be a day, or a night." He quickly added, considering he was dealing with
vampires. "That humans, vampires, boogeyman and other creatures of the night will live in peace with eachother, with
everyone having the same and equal rights." He ended his speech, and his public applauded. "Now gentleman, I would like to
a sing a song to get us in the spirit! It's called: 'If you're undead and you know it, clap you hands.'

These meetings turned out to be a rather great hit, and Buffy, who didn't know about this, found it strange that the
cemetery was so empty. "They must be planning something. God, I hope they're not trying to bring the Apocalypse again." Her
face turned grim, as always when she was forced to visit her least favourite vampire friend, Spike.

"Look babe, I don't what you're talking about. And even if I did, I wouldn't tell you." Buffy threw him against the wall of
what he called home, but mostly a rotten dampy no good crypt, depending on his mood.

"I know there's something going on! I haven't seen a vampire in weeks! Or any other freaky monster for that matter. So,
confess, what are you and your bloodsucking friends upto."

"They're not exactly my friends anymore, remember?" Spike said, standing up. "Look, I don't where they're all going, but
rumour has it there's some weird zombie having meetings. That's all I know." When Buffy took out her stake and got ready to
hit him he held up his hands. "Honest! He's in one of those abandoned sheds."

"You'd better be right." She put away her stake, and went for the sheds.

In Regs shed, they were singing the already infamous 'If you're undead and you know it, clap your hands.' Reg accompanied
them with his guitar, and the song ended with him looking for his fingers and sewing them back on. "Right, brothers and
sisters." He nodded a group of female vampires. "With that song I would like to end this..." With a crash, the door fell to
bits, revealing the Slayer. A couple vampires attacked her instinctively, but Reg called them back. "Wait! She is human, and
we must prove that we can be just as civilised as she!" The two vampires sat down, a bit sheepishly. "Although knocking our
door down is very impolite. May I ask who you are?" Reg asked.

"I'm Buffy. I'm the Slayer. I kill folks like you." She answered.

"Why do you kill us?" Reg asked.

"Because you kill humans to suck their blood, how dumb can you be!" Buffy answered, wondering why the vampires that had
tried to attack her were sitting in their chairs, almost blushing with embarrasment.

"That's stereotyping, young lady. Just because vampires have gotten a bad reputation from movies and books doesn't mean
we're all that bad." One of the female vampires jumped in.

"Well said, Sister Mary." Reg complimented her.

"Not all that bad?! I've seen you! You belonged to that vamp gang I wiped out a month ago. I remember you escaping!"
Buffy said, pointing to Sister Mary.

"Whether this is true or not, I must ask you to leave, miss Buffy. This is a meeting for non-humans only." Reg said.

To her own surprise, Buffy left.

The next day, she visited Giles and her friends in the Magic Shop. She told about her encouter last night, and all of them
were very surprised.

"And the freakiest bit was, when I was approaching, they were singing!" Buffy said.

"Wait, vampires singing? What were they singing? 'Suck me baby one more time?" Xander joked.

"Of course not! It was 'If you're undead and you know it, clap your hands.'" Buffy replied.
This caused the entire group to laugh, and Buffy interrupted. "And they actually clapped! That zombie must've used mind
control, or hypnosis." She looked at Giles.

"We-Well, there isn't that much known about zombie powers. They are said to be incredibly strong and very hard to kill,
since they're already dead. They're pretty rare around here, most of them are in Africa, or in South America, so I have no
experience with them, luckily, since they smell like rotten corpses." Giles said, cleaning his glasses with his sweater.

"It was really smelly in there, that's true. But he didn't seem very strong to me. He looked like he could fall apart any
minute." Buffy sat down.

Willow and Tara were whispering among themselves, and they seemed to reach some sort of conclusion. "I, we have an idea."
Willow started. "It's rather easy, all we have to do is summon someone who knows what's going on." She smiled.

"Willow, if you're considering summoning a demon, I can tell you that's not a good idea."
Giles said, a bit shocked Willow would think of that.

"No, no, not a demon, silly! I mean someone who knows what's going on, like Death." Willow said, and Tara nodded.

"Oh great, let's invite Death in here! Giles, I think I'd rather be dealing with some demon than Death." Buffy wasn't
enthusiastic about this idea. Who would?

"There's no real danger. I mean, Death doesn't kill people, he just sorta collects them. Demons kill people, vamps kill
people, but not Death as a person. And like I said, it's real easy. I need two ping pong balls and an egg." Tara explained.

"Two ping pong balls and an egg?" Giles looked confused. "I don't think I've heard of a ritual like that."

"It's not that known, and it's the basics of the ritual. Of course, you can use as many smelly things and newt eyes as you
want, as long as the balls are there, with the egg." Willow answered.

"It's the ritual of Asch-Kentze." Tara added.

The gang decided to go with this plan, although no-one seemed really comfortable with the idea. They would perform the
ritual in Buffy's training room, since Giles didn't want them coloring with cray-on on the floor in his shop.

The ritual itself went rather good, and Death did show up. The unexpected thing was, he did in the middle of Willow
reciting, when he wasn't even supposed to show up. "YES? WHAT DO YOU WANT?" He asked.

"Aaargh!" Willow screamed, surprised as the others. "What the, why are you here, I wasn't even done!"

Death shrugged. "SO? NOW, WHAT DO YOU WANT, I HAVE MORE TO DO TODAY."

Willow tried to regain her composture. "Right. Oh, foul creature of the night, I command thee..."

"WAIT A MINUTE. WHAT'S ALL THIS CREATURE OF THE NIGHT THING? JUST ASK WHAT YOU GOT TO ASK, NONE OF THIS FOUL CREATURE STUFF."

"Uhm...okay. There's this zombie, and he controls vampires, and they do what he says."
Willow said.

"SO?"

"Well, zombies aren't supposed to be here, and we were wondering how he got here?"

"WELL, THIS ZOMBIE, REG SHOE, IT'S HARD TO EXPLAIN. HE WAS SENT HERE BECAUSE HE WAS MAKING PROBLEMS IN THE NETHERWORLD,
AND I DECIDED TO SEND HIM HERE, SINCE THERE WERE LOTS OF VAMPIRES FOR HIM TO ERM, EDUCATE, AS HE PUTS IT."

"Oh, that's just great! Just dump those annoying zombies with us, we don't mind, not at all!" Buffy, hearing the news, was
a bit cranky.

"EXCUSE ME, BUT YOU ARE TALKING DEATH HERE, REMEMBER THAT? I UNDERSTAND YOU DO NOT LIKE HIM BEING HERE?" He looked around,
the gang nodded. He sighed. "FINE, I GUESS I CAN SEND SOME HELP. WOULD FIVE WIZARDS BE ENOUGH?" He asked.

Willow looked gleeful. "Wow! Five real wizards! That would be a great help, mister, er, Death!"

"GOOD TO SEE SOMEONE'S THANKFUL. THEY'LL BE HERE IN, SAY, FIVE MINUTES." With that, he dissapeared.

"Tara, did you hear that? Wizards! Think of all the stuff we can learn from them!"

"I know, but wizard and wicca magic is a bit different, and..." Tara tried to slow down Willow enthusiasm.

"Oh, I know that! But you never know."

'Great. First a zombie drops in, then we're getting wizards.' Buffy sighed, and sat down on a couch. 'Oh well, how much
trouble can five wizards possibly be?'


Well, that's chapter one finished. Love it? Loathe it? Let me know!