(WHHHHEEEEE!!! I'm already up to chapter five!! And MiracleChick? I reely, REELY apprectiate all the help you gave me with this.)


Happy Hanukkah Zim
Chapter Five: Day Five


Alas, skool was in session on this fifth day of Hanukkah. The "snow day" had ended, thanks to an interesting substance called "salt". Zim had watched
it curiously as it melted through the snow and ice. He wondered if it melted humans too, but upon throwing some at the Dib-human, he found that it only
annoyed him. Well, at least it had a purpose.

Zim sat at his desk, bored out of his mind as Ms. Bitters once again droned on in her lecture of Doom. Normally, he thought that 'doom' was a rather
interesting subject, but unless it involved the doom of the human race, he couldn't have cared less. Instead, the pessimestic teacher would lecture on
the *eventual* doom of the entire universe. Nothing that the great Zim could use, that's for sure.

/RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!/

The bell tolled the end of yet another time-consuming day of skool. Exhausted, Zim dragged his body outside, hoping that Dib wouldn't bother him.

Of course, *that* didn't happen.

"I know that you're up ot something Zim," Dib stated. "You might as well tell me."

"I'm not doing anything right NOW," Zim commented in return.

"You know what I'm talking about. Your plan."

Zim growled. "I'm warning you, Dib. I don't have time to play your silly games. I have a purpose to fulfill." He glared at the other boy. "And I refuse to let
you or ANYone interfere!!"

Dib smirked. "C'mon, you don't think that celebrating our holidays is going to help you, do you? This *is* a *peaceful* season, remember?"

"I'm being plenty peacful!"

"Sure you are. Prove it."

"I haven't hit you yet today."

".........oh, yeah." Dib was beaten, and Zim knew it. Smilng smugly, he headed back to his base, hoping Gir hadn't destroyed the place.

"Don't think you've won yet, Zim! I'll find out what you're trying to do!!" Dib called out.

Zim turned around slowly, a menacing look on his face. "Tell me, stinkbeast, *why* are you so mad with the idea of me actually doing something nice?"
He turned fast on his heel and walked off.

Dib was taken aback. "I'm not mad!" He yelled after Zim's fading form. "I'm just--- oh, he's not even listening." Dib bit his lip. "Fine. Don't listen to what
I have to say! It won't matter in the end anyway, when I see your guts strewn over an autopsy table!!" Fuming, Dib ran home.

Zim cackled as he walked. "Foolish Dib... if only he knew that I'm not doing anything at all. It's wearing him out... hey!" Zim got an idea. "Make him think
I'm up to something!" He smiled. "Maybe there's a use to celebrating this 'Hanukkah' after all."

Gir pounced on Zim the minute he walked in the door. "MasterMasterMasterMasterMaster!!!!!"

"What, Gir?"

"It's horrible!! The worst thing!!"

Zim pried Gir off his head, looking panicked. "What happened? What is it?!"

"We're out of pancake mix!!"

Zim twitched an eye. "...And?"

Gir sniffled and lowered his head. "I can't make latkies tonight."

"I didn't know you needed pancake mix to make latkies with."

"I need the recipe for it, though. They always print a pancake recipe on the box."

Zim sighed. He could sense where this conversation was going to lead, and decided to take a detour. "How about this, Gir," he said, setting the tiny
andriod on the floor, "Put on your disguise and go get some more pancake mix. But hurry back, alright?! The sun goes down sooner and sooner each
day!!"

Gir instantly cheered up. "Okay!" he cried and ran off.

Zim watched his rambunctious SIR unit head out the door. "A real pain at time, but... maybe I'll keep him. He's cute, anyway..." Bored, the Irken rose
from his position on the couch and wlked to the bookshelf. He came across the diary that Gir had given him the previous night. Curious, he ruffled
through it. No words, no pictures... "Maybe I should fix that..." Zim grabbed a pen off the side table and sketched a line across the paper. Soon, more
lines appeared, and curves alongside them. After a few minutes of wild snickering, Zim leaned back and viewed his creation.

It was a simple drawing, really, something that he could have drawn much better. Yet it was the value behind it that meant the most to Zim, as he had
drawn a picture of *Dib* being cut apart. It made him feel good inside, like he was getting revenge... yes, the sweet flavor of revenge...

Zim lay across the couch, propping himself up on one elbow, using his other hand to command the pen to his liking. After a few more minutes, another
sketch came forth, displaying the Dib-human dangling helplessly over a pack of Blorchians. More snickers echoed through the halls of the vast base,
and more and more drawings made their way into the world, each revealing a situation that Dib would not make it out of too quickly - if at all!

Zim became so caught up in his pictures that he didn't hear Gir walking through the front door. "Master, shouldn't you be lighting the lights?"

Zim's head shot up with a start. Behind the menorah, he could see the sun begining its steady descend behind the sity. He caught a quick glimpse of the
clock; 4:26. Gir had been gone nearly an hour. Zim hopped up. "Right! I'm getting to that now. You grab the yarmulkes, Gir."

Gir ran over to the couch and giggled. "I like your pictures, Master..."

"Look at them later, Gir! We don't have much time!!" He readed the candle for lighting.

"Yes, Sir!" The tiny one ran into the kitchen, re-appearing a moment later with the adequite headgear. "I got the hats!!"

"Stop calling them 'hats', Gir! It's a yarmulke. 'Yam-uh-kah'. Got it?"

"I got it!" Gir smiled and knelt down.

Zim sighed and tried to clam himself. (Relax... it's already the fifth day. You CAN survive.) He took a deep breath, knelt down by Gir, and closed his
eyes, speaking the words of the prayer.

After it ended, Zim called Gir into the kitchen. He pulled the coins from the freezer, carefully protected from the danger of melting. "For you, Gir." He
said. "Happy Fifth Day!"

Gir said nothing as he took the gelt. (I forgot about the present!!) He dug through the bag of stuff that he had bought at the store. A few seconds later
his hand emerged with a cup attatched to it. "I got chocolate bubblegum!"

Zim turned purple at the sight of the thick slushie. He never felt more disgusted, but he couldn't hurt Gir's feelings!! "Erm... thanks Gir... I guess." He took
a slooooooooooooooooow sip.

Gir clapped his hands. "He likes it! YAY!" Gir swallowed the frozen coins whole, wrapper and all, then ran outside to play in the snow.

Zim spit out the drink the minute Gir left his sight. "Ugh! How does he drink this stuff?" He wiped his mouth off and tossed the crushed icee into the trash
pail, not remembering that it lead to his lab until *after* he had tossed it. "Oh, crud." Sighing, he followed the mess downstairs and decided to take care
of it in the morning.