Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters in this story; Square does.
Author's Note: Still nothing in this chapter to justify the R-rating. That comes in the next and final chapter. And special thanks to Lucifer (um, that sounds really, really bad) for being my one-hundredth reviewer! And someone made an interesting point about part one not being written split-prose style. I dunno what happened there, because this one more closely follows the style used in "When Darkness Falls".
MOONBOUND
Part Two
Half Life
Balamb Garden was beautiful this time of year. Tasteful decorations lined the walls of the lobby, and a massive tree was positioned in the center of the first floor. It was so tall that the topmost decorations had had to be applied from the second floor catwalk.
There were fewer students than normal, as all those that had family had gone home for the holidays, many of them taking friends along as well. Roughly half the population was gone.
Raine had been delighted by her son's home. She'd expected a sterile military atmosphere upon learning what Garden was, and had been pleased at the school's pleasant feel. It was quite lovely, almost peaceful in nature. She wondered how it had become a military school and base.
Squall took Raine on a tour. He acted as calm and businesslike as befitted the SeeD commander, but he felt tense in his mother's presence. He didn't remember the woman, and had been abandoned by her. Perhaps she had done it to save him, but he couldn't help but feel oddly resentful.
If he'd been raised by someone who was like himself, would he have lost control and killed Nida and the others?
The cheerful group left at Garden had acknowledged the beast within Squall, the one contained by his collar, as the real murderer, but Squall wasn't so sure. They all trusted him because he was their commander. Squall thought that trust was misplaced. They couldn't feel the beast's frantic efforts to break free.
That was why he locked himself in his room every night, hoping that Rinoa would win the desperate race against time and defeat the creature completely.
It was a race they seemed to be losing because, inexplicably, Rinoa's powers were waning...
* * *
Rinoa shivered and hugged the sheets around her scarred body as Squall climbed out of bed. He opened the window on the far wall and stared out at the red and purple sky. She heard him sigh as he saw how low the sun hung on the horizon.
"Dusk already?" Rinoa said sadly. Squall kept his back to her, and she could see the tenseness in his muscles. He hated the change so much...
"What do you think of her?" Squall asked softly.
"Raine? She seems like a nice woman," Rinoa said, finally sliding out of bed to get to her clothes. "I shouldn't have any problems working with her."
Squall turned to her, his face troubled. "Does Edea know what's going on with your powers?"
Rinoa bit her lip. "No," she said after a moment. "It's probably just because I haven't been feeling well." She forced herself to smile. "Don't worry. I will cure you."
Squall fingered the collar, his hands absently loosening the drawstrings in preparation for his transformation. "Sometimes, I wish you wouldn't bother."
Rinoa stared at him. "Squall."
"Even if you do help me, I'll always remember what I've done. Three people are dead because of me. No one even trusts me anymore."
"That's not true," Rinoa said sharply.
"Isn't it? Headmaster Cid has been relying more and more on Quistis and Xu lately. Selphie and Zell find reasons not to partner with me. Irvine always has his hand on his gun when I come near him. If you had just let me die." Squall turned away from her again and watched the sky darken. "Sometimes, I don't think life is the greatest gift you could have given me. Death would be preferable to this half-life."
Rinoa couldn't think of anything to say as she pulled on her shirt. She tugged at her sleeve nervously as she watched the young commander's body twitch in anticipation. Rinoa went up to him and placed her hands on his shoulders, feeling the heat of his skin under her own cool palms. Squall flinched from her touch.
"It's almost time," he whispered. "Leave me." Rinoa pulled away and, with one final glance back at her beloved, left the room just as the emitted the moans that preceded his transformation. Rinoa locked the door behind her.
* * *
"Laguna and Ellone are going to be here at noon tomorrow."
The words, spoken by the enthusiastic young woman who had introduced herself as Selphie, made Raine stiffen. Selphie seemed totally unaware of the effect she'd had as she continued discussing the Christmas Eve bonfire she and the Festival Committee had planned for tomorrow night.
Laguna? Ellone? Coming here? Raine swallowed, trying to soothe the ache the names had caused. She would give anything to see them again. But what would they think of her? What if Laguna was disgusted by her? Worse, what if Laguna was happily married and brought his wife along?
Raine's hands clenched around the fork she was holding, her knuckles white with strain. Why hadn't Squall told her Laguna was coming? Surely he knew how awkward it would be?
"Morning," a soft voice said at Raine's side. She obligingly moved over and Rinoa sat beside her.
"Good morning. Are you hungry?" Raine asked politely.
Rinoa blanched and shook her head. "I haven't been feeling well," she admitted. "How was your night?" she continued softly.
Raine had stayed in her room as asked, curled comfortably on the bed. She'd accidentally torn the sheets with her claws, but other than that, she hadn't slept so comfortably in years.
"Very nice, and surprisingly peaceful for a school," she said.
Rinoa frowned. "You don't get any. urges?" she whispered. "You know. to kill?"
"No," Raine said quietly. "Except for a short time before Squall was born, I've never had the urge to kill anything, except for food when I was in hiding. I have predatory instincts, but I would. never harm a human." There was an odd look on her face as she said this. That wasn't always true.
Rinoa sank back in her seat. "Damn. What makes Squall different?"
"What do you mean?"
Rinoa glanced around the table full of happy students and hissed, "I'll tell you later. After breakfast, I'd like to see what I can sense about the curse. I'll tell you then."
Raine nodded. "Rinoa? How well do you know Laguna?" she asked hesitantly.
Rinoa started at the unexpected question. "Not very well. He seems very nice. Not very presidential, but nice."
"Presidential?" Raine repeated, but Rinoa never had the chance to answer, as Squall chose that moment to arrive, a half-empty tray in his pale, shaking hands.
He really isn't taking this well, Raine thought sadly as she took in her son's sickly form. What's wrong with him?
* * *
Rinoa tried to concentrate, but her powers wouldn't respond. What was wrong with them? They were growing weaker by the day!
Raine watched her with some confusion, while Squall sat silently, a closed look on his face.
"Is something the matter?" Raine ventured finally.
Rinoa couldn't meet the older woman's eyes. "It's my powers," she said miserably. "They're not what they should be."
"Perhaps you're losing them. Good; we could use less sorceresses in the world," Raine said, more harshly than she'd intended.
Squall and Rinoa stared at her in shock. "But. a sorceress is your only chance at being cured. Isn't that why you left Squall with Edea?'
"Abandoned me, you mean," Squall growled.
"Squall!" Rinoa said, surprised. "Don't-"
"She could have stayed with me to get help for herself," Squall snapped. "Why didn't you?" he challenged Raine.
Raine stared. "I - I couldn't keep you! I was - I am a monster!"
"I'm worse," Squall said, his voice now a dangerous whisper.
"I. I didn't think I deserved you. not after." Raine clamped her mouth shut.
"After what?" Squall demanded.
"I. killed a man," Raine said, her voice a whisper. "Before you were born. An Esthar soldier, coming to Winhill. I didn't know what came over me. I tore him to pieces."
Rinoa and Squall exchanged glances. "Did you ever get that urge to kill again?" Rinoa asked.
"I kept myself locked up at night because of those urges. But they vanished after a while. I thought it was a side effect of the transformation, and once I adjusted." Raine shrugged helplessly.
Rinoa frowned. "Perhaps," she ventured, "it didn't just disappear. I think it might have been passed on to Squall."
Raine looked devastated. "Then. giving him up didn't save him?" She turned towards Squall, who wouldn't meet her eyes. "I'm sorry," she whispered.
"What's done is done," Squall said coolly. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to lie down." He left them, hand pressed to his temple as if to soothe some inner pain.
Or to hold back the beast that was fighting its way free.
* * *
Rinoa spent the rest of the day out with her friends, gathering firewood for the upcoming bonfire. Selphie directed her other "volunteers" with glee, and soon the spot she had selected, a grassy plain in sight of Garden, was ready for tomorrow's festivities.
"All right!" she cried enthusiastically. "Now I just need some volunteers to help the cooks with dinner tomorrow - no, Zell, no hotdogs! - and another group to make sure the lobby's extra clean, 'cause Sir Laguna's gonna be here, too!"
There were good-natured groans from the assembled students and SeeD's, and Rinoa smiled despite the depression she'd been feeling. Maybe life's not perfect, she thought, but it's almost Christmas. I shouldn't be depressed! Selphie's optimism was infectious, and Rinoa was suddenly eager to attend the bonfire.
If only Squall could be there, too.
"Sir Laguna?' a voice behind her said incredulously. Rinoa turned and saw Raine standing behind her, a bundle of wood slung across her shoulders.
"That's what Selphie calls him," Rinoa laughed. "He doesn't seem very knightly to me, but." she just shrugged. Then she frowned when she saw the expression on Raine's face. "Are you nervous about seeing him again?" she asked gently.
"Is it that obvious?" Raine asked weakly. "Yes, I am. I've been gone so long. How does he feel about me? What will he say? Is he married? Is he happy?" She dropped the wood on top of the high pile, and slumped forward. " I don't even know where he's been all these years."
Rinoa felt sympathetic towards the older woman. "He's been in Esthar ever since he helped seal Adel away."
"Esthar?" Raine was stunned.
"As their president," Rinoa concluded.
Raine just stared, slack-jawed. "Laguna? President? Are you joking?"
Rinoa laughed. "Squall can't figure it out either. But from what we've heard, he does an excellent job. And," she added as an afterthought, "he's never remarried."
Raine wandered away, trying to cope with the shock. Rinoa grinned. She couldn't wait to see their reunion tomorrow.
* * *
It was bad tonight; worse than it had ever been. The beast inside attacked the magical barriers with a fierceness that left Squall feeling weak. His head pounded, and his body trembled. The potions Dr. Kadowaki had advised were little help. He felt as if he were going to die.
He wished he would. As the transformation tore through his pain-wracked body, Squall prayed that this time it would kill him.
* * *
"Wake up! We have a lot of work to do before Sir Laguna gets here!"
Rinoa wondered how anyone could be so damned cheerful this early in the morning. She groaned and turned over on her bed as Selphie left the doorframe and continued on her rounds to awaken everyone else.
Maybe a Silence spell could persuade the girl to shut up and let her sleep longer.
Rinoa groaned and got to her feet, wondering if she dared wake Squall. It wouldn't be fair for him to avoid Selphie's tyranny while everyone else worked.
To her surprise, Squall was already in the lobby, organizing work crews. His face was pale, and the smile he gave her was tremulous, but he wasn't going to miss the holidays. She frowned as he turned away and she noticed the bruises and welts on his neck, barely visible over his collar. He'd been hurting himself.
Which meant it was getting worse. Damn, why were her powers failing her now?
Raine arrived a few minutes later, her healthy glow a striking contrast to Squall's pallor. Why was she so different?
Concerns about Squall's curse were pushed from her mind as the day progressed. Teams were dispatched to make certain there were no monsters near the bonfire site, while others helped in the kitchen to prepare the big feast, which would take place a few hours before dusk. Marshmallows and, to Zell's delight, hotdogs, were set aside for the bonfire.
Students and SeeDs alike slipped away at any free moment to Balamb town to do last minute Christmas shopping, and the area under the large public tree was piled high with gifts.
Rinoa's own gift to Squall, a gift certificate for the weapons shop to pick out a new gunblade, was something she planned to give him in private. She couldn't wait to get him alone.
* * *
At about one o'clock, Laguna arrived. He'd come with just Ellone, leaving Ward and Kiros to defend Esthar. A crowd gathered around as his ship docked, and Raine hung back uncertainly, shivering in the elegant dress Edea had lent her for the dinner. It had snowed the night before, which had delighted Selphie to no end.
Laguna looked exactly as she remembered him. Sure, there were more lines around his eyes and mouth, and streaks of grey contrasted with his jet- black hair, but his green eyes still held the same guileless look, and his lips were curved in that shy, goofy smile she'd fallen in love with.
How she longed to go to him! But she held back, drinking in the sight of him.
Selphie bounded over to him. "Merry Christmas, Laguna!" she said. "We're glad you could make it."
Laguna grinned. "I'm glad you invited me. Those presidential parties are boring! Estharians don't know how to have fun." His gaze wandered over the crowd before fastening on Squall and Rinoa who, like Raine, were also at the crowd's fringe. He started to head towards them, Ellone at his elbow, when Selphie stopped him.
"We have a surprise for you!" she said. Her eyes scanned the crowd, and Raine hunched down when she realized who Selphie was looking for. Not now! Not like this! Too late; Selphie had spotted her and was dragging Laguna towards her. "Look who Squall found!" Selphie crowed.
Laguna stopped dead, Ellone a step behind him. They both stared, and Raine twitched uncomfortably. "Hello, Laguna," Raine said weakly.
"Raine?" Laguna and Ellone said in unison. They stood standing for a few moments, each taking in the sight before them, then Laguna gave a strangled cry and lunged towards Raine and engulfed her in a desperate embrace.
* * *
Laguna and Raine's reunion was the talk of the dinner a few hours later. They sat next to each other, Laguna's arm tight around Raine, with Ellone to the side, a pleased smile on her face.
Rinoa wished she could be that happy. Beside her, Squall ate in sullen silence, his eyes unfocused. Occasionally, a hand would stray towards the collar around his throat that had replaced his Griever necklace. He was fighting the beast, and getting weaker all the time.
She looped an arm through his, and rested her head on his shoulder. She watched Laguna and Raine enviously as the couple chattered nonstop. She knew Raine had told Laguna the truth earlier, and the fact that neither he nor Ellone held it against her had opened the woman up.
Raine still seemed uncomfortable around her son, however; from the sad looks she would toss them, Rinoa knew Squall's harsh accusations were heavy on the woman's mind. Rinoa hoped they could make amends by Christmas.
She sighed, toying with her food. If only she could have found the cure to Squall's condition for Christmas. She'd show him what was truly the greatest gift he could receive.
I don't think life is the greatest gift you could give me. Squall was so melancholy. She wondered if there was any way to cheer him up.
Looking at his somber face, Rinoa wondered if he could ever be happy again.
* * *
Squall and Raine walked down the silent corridor together. It was nearly dusk, and the party had moved outside for the bonfire. Raine and Squall were heading towards their rooms to spend their nights alone.
Raine missed Laguna already. She still couldn't believe he'd been made president of a country as powerful as Esthar. He wanted her to go with him, werewolf of not. She'd told him she was going to help find a cure for Squall and then. She didn't know. It wasn't as if she had anything better to do. Or anything she'd rather do.
On the other hand, she wanted to get to know her son. "Squall?" she said tentatively. He turned to her, his face screwed up in pain. "I wanted to talk to you."
"Can it wait?" Squall asked harshly. "I don't feel well." At her hurt look, Squall sighed and his face softened. "Look, I'm not good to speak to this close to a transformation. If you want to talk, tomorrow will be better."
"Right," Raine whispered as they reached Squall's room.
"Good night, Raine," he told her before locking himself inside.
"Good night, my son," she said softly before heading towards her own room.
* * *
The sheets tore beneath his claws as Squall writhed and twisted on the bed, his wolfish body wracked with pain. The collar burned his neck, the fur shriveling where it touched the leather and the skin blistering. The gems glowed brightly as they struggled to contain the beast that strained to break free.
It's no use! The beast's mind was digging into Squall's with claws of fire, and he howled in pain.
He clawed at the collar, trying to hold it away from his tormented flesh.
That's when it happened: The first of the gems exploded, sending glassy fragments all over his bed. Then another shattered, and another, and then the room was plunged into darkness as the last of the stones died.
Squall couldn't withstand the onslaught of the beast's mind. Insane with its confinement, it overwhelmed the SeeD in a wave of fury that sent Squall's consciousness into hiding.
The beast was free; and this time, nothing would stand in its way.
To Be Concluded.
Author's Note: Still nothing in this chapter to justify the R-rating. That comes in the next and final chapter. And special thanks to Lucifer (um, that sounds really, really bad) for being my one-hundredth reviewer! And someone made an interesting point about part one not being written split-prose style. I dunno what happened there, because this one more closely follows the style used in "When Darkness Falls".
MOONBOUND
Part Two
Half Life
Balamb Garden was beautiful this time of year. Tasteful decorations lined the walls of the lobby, and a massive tree was positioned in the center of the first floor. It was so tall that the topmost decorations had had to be applied from the second floor catwalk.
There were fewer students than normal, as all those that had family had gone home for the holidays, many of them taking friends along as well. Roughly half the population was gone.
Raine had been delighted by her son's home. She'd expected a sterile military atmosphere upon learning what Garden was, and had been pleased at the school's pleasant feel. It was quite lovely, almost peaceful in nature. She wondered how it had become a military school and base.
Squall took Raine on a tour. He acted as calm and businesslike as befitted the SeeD commander, but he felt tense in his mother's presence. He didn't remember the woman, and had been abandoned by her. Perhaps she had done it to save him, but he couldn't help but feel oddly resentful.
If he'd been raised by someone who was like himself, would he have lost control and killed Nida and the others?
The cheerful group left at Garden had acknowledged the beast within Squall, the one contained by his collar, as the real murderer, but Squall wasn't so sure. They all trusted him because he was their commander. Squall thought that trust was misplaced. They couldn't feel the beast's frantic efforts to break free.
That was why he locked himself in his room every night, hoping that Rinoa would win the desperate race against time and defeat the creature completely.
It was a race they seemed to be losing because, inexplicably, Rinoa's powers were waning...
* * *
Rinoa shivered and hugged the sheets around her scarred body as Squall climbed out of bed. He opened the window on the far wall and stared out at the red and purple sky. She heard him sigh as he saw how low the sun hung on the horizon.
"Dusk already?" Rinoa said sadly. Squall kept his back to her, and she could see the tenseness in his muscles. He hated the change so much...
"What do you think of her?" Squall asked softly.
"Raine? She seems like a nice woman," Rinoa said, finally sliding out of bed to get to her clothes. "I shouldn't have any problems working with her."
Squall turned to her, his face troubled. "Does Edea know what's going on with your powers?"
Rinoa bit her lip. "No," she said after a moment. "It's probably just because I haven't been feeling well." She forced herself to smile. "Don't worry. I will cure you."
Squall fingered the collar, his hands absently loosening the drawstrings in preparation for his transformation. "Sometimes, I wish you wouldn't bother."
Rinoa stared at him. "Squall."
"Even if you do help me, I'll always remember what I've done. Three people are dead because of me. No one even trusts me anymore."
"That's not true," Rinoa said sharply.
"Isn't it? Headmaster Cid has been relying more and more on Quistis and Xu lately. Selphie and Zell find reasons not to partner with me. Irvine always has his hand on his gun when I come near him. If you had just let me die." Squall turned away from her again and watched the sky darken. "Sometimes, I don't think life is the greatest gift you could have given me. Death would be preferable to this half-life."
Rinoa couldn't think of anything to say as she pulled on her shirt. She tugged at her sleeve nervously as she watched the young commander's body twitch in anticipation. Rinoa went up to him and placed her hands on his shoulders, feeling the heat of his skin under her own cool palms. Squall flinched from her touch.
"It's almost time," he whispered. "Leave me." Rinoa pulled away and, with one final glance back at her beloved, left the room just as the emitted the moans that preceded his transformation. Rinoa locked the door behind her.
* * *
"Laguna and Ellone are going to be here at noon tomorrow."
The words, spoken by the enthusiastic young woman who had introduced herself as Selphie, made Raine stiffen. Selphie seemed totally unaware of the effect she'd had as she continued discussing the Christmas Eve bonfire she and the Festival Committee had planned for tomorrow night.
Laguna? Ellone? Coming here? Raine swallowed, trying to soothe the ache the names had caused. She would give anything to see them again. But what would they think of her? What if Laguna was disgusted by her? Worse, what if Laguna was happily married and brought his wife along?
Raine's hands clenched around the fork she was holding, her knuckles white with strain. Why hadn't Squall told her Laguna was coming? Surely he knew how awkward it would be?
"Morning," a soft voice said at Raine's side. She obligingly moved over and Rinoa sat beside her.
"Good morning. Are you hungry?" Raine asked politely.
Rinoa blanched and shook her head. "I haven't been feeling well," she admitted. "How was your night?" she continued softly.
Raine had stayed in her room as asked, curled comfortably on the bed. She'd accidentally torn the sheets with her claws, but other than that, she hadn't slept so comfortably in years.
"Very nice, and surprisingly peaceful for a school," she said.
Rinoa frowned. "You don't get any. urges?" she whispered. "You know. to kill?"
"No," Raine said quietly. "Except for a short time before Squall was born, I've never had the urge to kill anything, except for food when I was in hiding. I have predatory instincts, but I would. never harm a human." There was an odd look on her face as she said this. That wasn't always true.
Rinoa sank back in her seat. "Damn. What makes Squall different?"
"What do you mean?"
Rinoa glanced around the table full of happy students and hissed, "I'll tell you later. After breakfast, I'd like to see what I can sense about the curse. I'll tell you then."
Raine nodded. "Rinoa? How well do you know Laguna?" she asked hesitantly.
Rinoa started at the unexpected question. "Not very well. He seems very nice. Not very presidential, but nice."
"Presidential?" Raine repeated, but Rinoa never had the chance to answer, as Squall chose that moment to arrive, a half-empty tray in his pale, shaking hands.
He really isn't taking this well, Raine thought sadly as she took in her son's sickly form. What's wrong with him?
* * *
Rinoa tried to concentrate, but her powers wouldn't respond. What was wrong with them? They were growing weaker by the day!
Raine watched her with some confusion, while Squall sat silently, a closed look on his face.
"Is something the matter?" Raine ventured finally.
Rinoa couldn't meet the older woman's eyes. "It's my powers," she said miserably. "They're not what they should be."
"Perhaps you're losing them. Good; we could use less sorceresses in the world," Raine said, more harshly than she'd intended.
Squall and Rinoa stared at her in shock. "But. a sorceress is your only chance at being cured. Isn't that why you left Squall with Edea?'
"Abandoned me, you mean," Squall growled.
"Squall!" Rinoa said, surprised. "Don't-"
"She could have stayed with me to get help for herself," Squall snapped. "Why didn't you?" he challenged Raine.
Raine stared. "I - I couldn't keep you! I was - I am a monster!"
"I'm worse," Squall said, his voice now a dangerous whisper.
"I. I didn't think I deserved you. not after." Raine clamped her mouth shut.
"After what?" Squall demanded.
"I. killed a man," Raine said, her voice a whisper. "Before you were born. An Esthar soldier, coming to Winhill. I didn't know what came over me. I tore him to pieces."
Rinoa and Squall exchanged glances. "Did you ever get that urge to kill again?" Rinoa asked.
"I kept myself locked up at night because of those urges. But they vanished after a while. I thought it was a side effect of the transformation, and once I adjusted." Raine shrugged helplessly.
Rinoa frowned. "Perhaps," she ventured, "it didn't just disappear. I think it might have been passed on to Squall."
Raine looked devastated. "Then. giving him up didn't save him?" She turned towards Squall, who wouldn't meet her eyes. "I'm sorry," she whispered.
"What's done is done," Squall said coolly. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to lie down." He left them, hand pressed to his temple as if to soothe some inner pain.
Or to hold back the beast that was fighting its way free.
* * *
Rinoa spent the rest of the day out with her friends, gathering firewood for the upcoming bonfire. Selphie directed her other "volunteers" with glee, and soon the spot she had selected, a grassy plain in sight of Garden, was ready for tomorrow's festivities.
"All right!" she cried enthusiastically. "Now I just need some volunteers to help the cooks with dinner tomorrow - no, Zell, no hotdogs! - and another group to make sure the lobby's extra clean, 'cause Sir Laguna's gonna be here, too!"
There were good-natured groans from the assembled students and SeeD's, and Rinoa smiled despite the depression she'd been feeling. Maybe life's not perfect, she thought, but it's almost Christmas. I shouldn't be depressed! Selphie's optimism was infectious, and Rinoa was suddenly eager to attend the bonfire.
If only Squall could be there, too.
"Sir Laguna?' a voice behind her said incredulously. Rinoa turned and saw Raine standing behind her, a bundle of wood slung across her shoulders.
"That's what Selphie calls him," Rinoa laughed. "He doesn't seem very knightly to me, but." she just shrugged. Then she frowned when she saw the expression on Raine's face. "Are you nervous about seeing him again?" she asked gently.
"Is it that obvious?" Raine asked weakly. "Yes, I am. I've been gone so long. How does he feel about me? What will he say? Is he married? Is he happy?" She dropped the wood on top of the high pile, and slumped forward. " I don't even know where he's been all these years."
Rinoa felt sympathetic towards the older woman. "He's been in Esthar ever since he helped seal Adel away."
"Esthar?" Raine was stunned.
"As their president," Rinoa concluded.
Raine just stared, slack-jawed. "Laguna? President? Are you joking?"
Rinoa laughed. "Squall can't figure it out either. But from what we've heard, he does an excellent job. And," she added as an afterthought, "he's never remarried."
Raine wandered away, trying to cope with the shock. Rinoa grinned. She couldn't wait to see their reunion tomorrow.
* * *
It was bad tonight; worse than it had ever been. The beast inside attacked the magical barriers with a fierceness that left Squall feeling weak. His head pounded, and his body trembled. The potions Dr. Kadowaki had advised were little help. He felt as if he were going to die.
He wished he would. As the transformation tore through his pain-wracked body, Squall prayed that this time it would kill him.
* * *
"Wake up! We have a lot of work to do before Sir Laguna gets here!"
Rinoa wondered how anyone could be so damned cheerful this early in the morning. She groaned and turned over on her bed as Selphie left the doorframe and continued on her rounds to awaken everyone else.
Maybe a Silence spell could persuade the girl to shut up and let her sleep longer.
Rinoa groaned and got to her feet, wondering if she dared wake Squall. It wouldn't be fair for him to avoid Selphie's tyranny while everyone else worked.
To her surprise, Squall was already in the lobby, organizing work crews. His face was pale, and the smile he gave her was tremulous, but he wasn't going to miss the holidays. She frowned as he turned away and she noticed the bruises and welts on his neck, barely visible over his collar. He'd been hurting himself.
Which meant it was getting worse. Damn, why were her powers failing her now?
Raine arrived a few minutes later, her healthy glow a striking contrast to Squall's pallor. Why was she so different?
Concerns about Squall's curse were pushed from her mind as the day progressed. Teams were dispatched to make certain there were no monsters near the bonfire site, while others helped in the kitchen to prepare the big feast, which would take place a few hours before dusk. Marshmallows and, to Zell's delight, hotdogs, were set aside for the bonfire.
Students and SeeDs alike slipped away at any free moment to Balamb town to do last minute Christmas shopping, and the area under the large public tree was piled high with gifts.
Rinoa's own gift to Squall, a gift certificate for the weapons shop to pick out a new gunblade, was something she planned to give him in private. She couldn't wait to get him alone.
* * *
At about one o'clock, Laguna arrived. He'd come with just Ellone, leaving Ward and Kiros to defend Esthar. A crowd gathered around as his ship docked, and Raine hung back uncertainly, shivering in the elegant dress Edea had lent her for the dinner. It had snowed the night before, which had delighted Selphie to no end.
Laguna looked exactly as she remembered him. Sure, there were more lines around his eyes and mouth, and streaks of grey contrasted with his jet- black hair, but his green eyes still held the same guileless look, and his lips were curved in that shy, goofy smile she'd fallen in love with.
How she longed to go to him! But she held back, drinking in the sight of him.
Selphie bounded over to him. "Merry Christmas, Laguna!" she said. "We're glad you could make it."
Laguna grinned. "I'm glad you invited me. Those presidential parties are boring! Estharians don't know how to have fun." His gaze wandered over the crowd before fastening on Squall and Rinoa who, like Raine, were also at the crowd's fringe. He started to head towards them, Ellone at his elbow, when Selphie stopped him.
"We have a surprise for you!" she said. Her eyes scanned the crowd, and Raine hunched down when she realized who Selphie was looking for. Not now! Not like this! Too late; Selphie had spotted her and was dragging Laguna towards her. "Look who Squall found!" Selphie crowed.
Laguna stopped dead, Ellone a step behind him. They both stared, and Raine twitched uncomfortably. "Hello, Laguna," Raine said weakly.
"Raine?" Laguna and Ellone said in unison. They stood standing for a few moments, each taking in the sight before them, then Laguna gave a strangled cry and lunged towards Raine and engulfed her in a desperate embrace.
* * *
Laguna and Raine's reunion was the talk of the dinner a few hours later. They sat next to each other, Laguna's arm tight around Raine, with Ellone to the side, a pleased smile on her face.
Rinoa wished she could be that happy. Beside her, Squall ate in sullen silence, his eyes unfocused. Occasionally, a hand would stray towards the collar around his throat that had replaced his Griever necklace. He was fighting the beast, and getting weaker all the time.
She looped an arm through his, and rested her head on his shoulder. She watched Laguna and Raine enviously as the couple chattered nonstop. She knew Raine had told Laguna the truth earlier, and the fact that neither he nor Ellone held it against her had opened the woman up.
Raine still seemed uncomfortable around her son, however; from the sad looks she would toss them, Rinoa knew Squall's harsh accusations were heavy on the woman's mind. Rinoa hoped they could make amends by Christmas.
She sighed, toying with her food. If only she could have found the cure to Squall's condition for Christmas. She'd show him what was truly the greatest gift he could receive.
I don't think life is the greatest gift you could give me. Squall was so melancholy. She wondered if there was any way to cheer him up.
Looking at his somber face, Rinoa wondered if he could ever be happy again.
* * *
Squall and Raine walked down the silent corridor together. It was nearly dusk, and the party had moved outside for the bonfire. Raine and Squall were heading towards their rooms to spend their nights alone.
Raine missed Laguna already. She still couldn't believe he'd been made president of a country as powerful as Esthar. He wanted her to go with him, werewolf of not. She'd told him she was going to help find a cure for Squall and then. She didn't know. It wasn't as if she had anything better to do. Or anything she'd rather do.
On the other hand, she wanted to get to know her son. "Squall?" she said tentatively. He turned to her, his face screwed up in pain. "I wanted to talk to you."
"Can it wait?" Squall asked harshly. "I don't feel well." At her hurt look, Squall sighed and his face softened. "Look, I'm not good to speak to this close to a transformation. If you want to talk, tomorrow will be better."
"Right," Raine whispered as they reached Squall's room.
"Good night, Raine," he told her before locking himself inside.
"Good night, my son," she said softly before heading towards her own room.
* * *
The sheets tore beneath his claws as Squall writhed and twisted on the bed, his wolfish body wracked with pain. The collar burned his neck, the fur shriveling where it touched the leather and the skin blistering. The gems glowed brightly as they struggled to contain the beast that strained to break free.
It's no use! The beast's mind was digging into Squall's with claws of fire, and he howled in pain.
He clawed at the collar, trying to hold it away from his tormented flesh.
That's when it happened: The first of the gems exploded, sending glassy fragments all over his bed. Then another shattered, and another, and then the room was plunged into darkness as the last of the stones died.
Squall couldn't withstand the onslaught of the beast's mind. Insane with its confinement, it overwhelmed the SeeD in a wave of fury that sent Squall's consciousness into hiding.
The beast was free; and this time, nothing would stand in its way.
To Be Concluded.
