A Place To Call Home
Part Five
By Bonnie-Chan
Email: hunniebunny@aol.com
Web page: http://www.sailormoonrose.mirrorz.com
Today is: November 10, 2001

Hey everyone! I know, I know, it's been TOO long...I could give you excuses about my midterms and stuff, but I won't. I worked out that glitch I came across in the story, and decided that if I work the remainder of the story right, it won't be a problem after all, so I don't need to change a thing! Talk about a relief!
Now, no one has mentioned this to me, but you might, so let me clear something up. This story doesn't have Sailor Moon or Tuxedo Kamen, I didn't think it fit into what I was trying to create. As some of you have noticed, I am replaying actual show events to show what was happening (well, in this story, anyway!)...the same things, but no enemies. From here on out, I'm still going to use some events, but like I mentioned before, I hit a glitch when I realized that the last chapter I put out came too soon! So that means that the rest of the storyline is going to be a bit messed up...I'm going to try and keep it true, yet at the same time it WILL be different...about as different as it already is, lol! That's just some FYI I thought you, my loyal readers (who have come this far...I'm impressed! Thanks for the support!)!
Yes, I know this chapter is relatively short...it's because of the break point. The next chapter is longer, about 12 pages! I COULD break it up...but I won't...it goes together. And for the first time since July, my writer's block on this story is over! I finally have an idea for Chapter Seven! Yay!!!! Here's to more chapters soon!
The archives are coming to my website SOON! There are currently 26 authors aboard. I just finished uploading all the chapters to various webpages to convert them over to Angelfire. I am currently about to begin the process of linking each and every story...and there are quite a few! Aside from this monster feat, all that needs to be done is to get summaries on the stories, and ratings for them! I've had to beg people to help me with this job-Thanks to the four wonderful people who deemed themselves worthy to help me! Bryn, Gaz, Mara, Zan...you four are going to be my life savers! I swear!
^_^ Thanks again, you'll never know what a help you are! ^_^
I'd also like to thank Silver Sailor Moon for all of her help and support when I was writing my Halloween story last week! I forgot to mention you, dear, I'm sorry! But I'm making up for it now! Thanks so much, you're an angel in disguise, I SWEAR!!!
Okay, okay, enough yakking.....bet you really want me to shut up so you can read, right? Well, wish granted!
DISCLAIMER: Sailor Moon? Not mine. But boy, I wish Mamo-Chan was mine! ^_~ Too bad Naoko-hime won't sell him to me!
Now, on with the story!

A Place To Call Home
Chapter Five
~~~
That night, Mamoru twisted and turned uneasily in his sleep, experiencing nightmare after nightmare until he finally woke up in a cold sweat with three hours to kill before he had to be at the hospital.
He slowly got up, took a shower, and ate breakfast before heading outside and walking aimlessly around town before coming to the park where he had fought with Usagi the night before. He headed down the bank towards the lake and sat on a nearby bench, where he watched the golden sun shyly peek its head out from above the lake before surging forwards into the sky, lighting its path of ascension with glorious shades of pink and orange. He watched the colors melt into the increasingly bright blue sky, and the fluffy white clouds come out of hiding to frolic in the sky with one another once more, while the golden sun smiled down upon all the activity from its throne like a loving mother.
So entranced was he by this simple, yet elaborate play that the heavens were performing for the world to see, yet seemed to be viewed solely for him-telling him to cheer up and be happy, as if he ever could again-that he failed to see the shadow that appeared before him. It came closer, mixing with his own shadow, until the owner of the shadow stood still and spoke.
"It's going to be a beautiful day, don't you think?"
Mamoru started in surprise, blinking as he focused his stormy blue eyes on the solemn girl standing before him. "It looks that way."
"I couldn't sleep very well last night, and I woke up waaay before I normally do and couldn't get back to sleep, so…I just decided to walk around for a while." She paused as she looked thoughtfully at the young man standing before her. "It's a gorgeous day out, Mamoru, an omen sent from God to tell us to make up, for no one should stay angry on so beautiful a day. The day has just begun, and it's time to start anew-after all, there must have been a reason for us to meet up here this morning!" She chewed at her lip for a moment, preparing what she wanted to say.
"I didn't mean what I said last night, Mamoru. I was hurt by your words, even though I knew they weren't true, and I wanted to retaliate. So I became this sarcastic person, and lashed out at you. I didn't mean to rip you apart like that, honest."
"I didn't mean what I said either, Usagi. I was just lost in my thoughts, then you came along, and the sadistic side inside of me came out, and thought that by inflicting pain on you, the wounds inside of me would be soothed."
"Did it work?"
"No, I just felt worse afterwards. I'm really sorry, Usagi."
"Me too. But, Mamoru…I do know more than you may think. That's one thing you-and a lot of other people-have never given me enough credit for. I saw what pain you were in yesterday before you closed me out. You can't quickly shove every person you'll ever meet out the door without giving them a chance out of fear, Mamoru. You have to shape up or you'll live a miserable life."
"What are you talking about?"
"Would you like to know what I really see, Mamoru? I see a scared little boy who is hiding from the world. He's too afraid to come out and let his feelings show." She looked him in the eye. I see a boy who puts others down and berates the qualities he likes the most about them because he's jealous-he's jealous because they have what he wants in life. So this little boy, he thrives on bringing these people down along with him. But you know what, Mamoru? You won't gain anything in life by bringing others down. If anything, you'll go down right along with them." She shook her head.
"You have to learn to cope with your emotions, Mamoru. Yet you cover them like a mask, concealing what you truly feel and replacing it with a cool, nonchalant façade. If you don't take off your mask, you'll live a miserable life." Usagi shrugged helplessly. "I'm sorry, Mamoru…I didn't mean to be so blunt. I'll just leave you alone now, I'm sorry." She turned towards the path she had come from and began to walk away.
"Usagi?"
She turned her head. "Yes, Mamoru?"
"You were right. Thank you."
She smiled sadly. "You don't need to thank me, really---I was too harsh, I shouldn't have said-"
"You saw right through me, Usagi. How?"
"I don't know…I've always been a little more perceptive than other people…"
"Are you telepathic?"
"No…I just saw your eyes."
"My…eyes?"
"The eyes are the window to the soul. I read your eyes, Mamoru. I saw into your soul while your guard was down-that's probably the first time you've ever let your guard down around me." She smiled sadly.
"You saw all that?"
"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have-"
"You were right…and you weren't. I suppose I do torment you out of jealously for what you have that I don't, yet at the same time, I don't truly hate you, for I am also in awe of what you have." He frowned before continuing. "Another reason I continually snap at you is because you show up at the most inopportune times. Every time I've seen you since and including the day I met you, I've been angry and upset with other things on my mind. I've snapped at you to try to heal those wounds. The worst time was last night, followed by the day I met you for the first time."
"Oh!" Usagi's eyes softened in concern. "Do you want to talk about it?"
"Not right now, I'm really not ready to-I can't even tell Motoki half of the stuff going through my mind…you were right yesterday, I do shut him out. I'm just going through some things that I have to work through myself right now…but thanks for asking." He looked solemnly at the blond standing before him. "So, what do you think, can we finally call a truce? Can we put aside our differences and actually become friends?"
Usagi chewed at her lip a moment before responding. "We can call a truce, Mamoru…but we can't be friends, at least…not today, and not tomorrow. Maybe someday, but not now. I can't truly trust you, not yet, even though you've shown me more of yourself today than you ever did before. Without trust, a person has nothing in life. We can finally call a truce, though; we can finally become civil towards one another and finally take a step in the right direction, instead of the two steps backwards that we've become accustomed to."
Mamoru nodded slowly, absorbing her words. "I don't deserve your trust, Usagi. I've done too many awful things to you. But I definitely do want to call a truce." He held out his hand and she slowly took it, sealing the deal with a shake of the hand.
"Don't feel sad, Mamoru, you have the power to change things and become what you want to be in life. You've finally taken step in the right direction-you've begun to control your own destiny, instead of letting it control you. You've taken the first step tonight by finally coming clean with your emotions." She smiled softly.
"Don't think that I'm cold-hearted, Mamoru. I just need to be able to trust the people I associate with-and someday, maybe you will too. And, Mamoru? To ease your soul, I don't totally mistrust you-after all, you did come clean with yourself