Chapter 3. Regret.

Snape staggered out of the cottage into the freezing rain, his head pounding as he ran back down through the village, the icy rain lashing his face. As he approached the castle gates he stopped to catch his breath. He leant against one of the huge stone pillars and ran his hands through his sodden hair. What had he done, he felt sick at the thought of his disgusting behaviour.

Slowly he walked to the entrance hall and took a deep breath before going in; there was no one about, not even Filch, so he gratefully made his way to his rooms, unseen. There he flung off his drenched cloak, pulled off his muddy boots and sat on the edge of his bed, his head in his hands unable to comprehend just what he'd done to that exquisite creature. The vision of her slumped on the floor, shaking and trembling, because he had given way to his most base desires.

A cold shiver woke him, and his dull, aching body, taunted him into remembering last night. What had he lost that night, maybe his one chance of some kind of lasting happiness. But he had destroyed it, as he had destroyed Annia.

Somehow he had to continue his life at Hogwarts, he had nowhere else to go and no one must know how low he had stooped. How his mindless, carnal, lust had smashed his restraint and self-denial, ideals he'd tried to maintain since he'd renounced his dark past.



The weeks that followed found Snape's mood more morose and vindictive than ever. Every smiling, happy face sickened him, every childish laugh taunted him and he had brought this bitter self-loathing on himself, by his own despicable actions. And so for the first time he had entrusted one of the pupils to undertake his errand to the apothecaries; he couldn't see Annia again, her delicate features; her sweet demeanour. No, not now he had defiled her.

Christmas came and went with heavy snow, but no respite from his self- inflicted misery, no festive cheer to lighten his mood. Not the prospect of any post, which he had ignored since that night, too.

But then just before the start of the new term, there was a knock on his door, it was the Prefect he had assigned to fetch his provisions,.

"Oh, Sir, there's a letter for you, well there's a few, only I've been told to clear out the post room and I thought,"

"Yes, thank you Weasley, leave them on my desk, and here's the list, if you could go now".

The boy did as he was instructed and left for Hogsmeade, as Snape remained sitting at his desk, looking at the three letters before him. One was from a distant relative, no doubt with some tedious gossip, but the other two were in the same handwriting he didn't recognise.





He opened the first and was stunned by it's contents; it was from Annia:

"Dear, Severus

I must speak to you after what happened, I've looked for you, but no one's seen you outside Hogwarts. There's something I must explain.

Annia."

She wanted to see him, but why? Then he opened the second letter and that too said she needed to see him.

"Come down to the village, you know where to find me."

As Snape read the words again his mind was racing, what could she want to say to him. How could he justify his actions when they were inexcusable. How could he face her, look into those eyes. How could he not, he had to take the chance, to risk her rejection.

He sat at his desk, staring blankly ahead, his work left unfinished, and as the night wore on he resolved to meet her, and he knew he had to go tonight.

He had to see her tonight.

The snow was deep underfoot, but the air was still and the moon shone brightly on the sparkling ground, as Snape made his way through the castle grounds towards Hogsmeade for this meeting he was dreading and yet he was desperate to see Annia once more. As he neared the Inn he was in two minds as to whether he should go in. How could he apologise to her for such an unforgivable act. He had used her and left her forlorn; but the thought of her seductive curves and her low, soft voice drove him on.

He slipped into the Inn unseen, and took a seat by the door, away from the crowd who sat as near to the large roaring fire as they could. His eyes darted round the room looking for Annia, then he saw her. It was too late to back out now.

She walked towards him, expressionless then said. "We need to talk"

"Yes, I know"

"Come with me, we can't talk here" and she looked around at the busy room.

Then she turned away and they went through the back of the Inn, down the alleyway to her house, as Snape went in, he remembered that night of carnal lust and he hesitated in the doorway.

"Sit down, there's something I need to tell you"

So he went into the room and as he looked round realised he couldn't recognise a thing from his last visit. He could only visualise Annia from that night and now she sat waiting to talk to him.

"Listen, I don't blame you for what happened. I shouldn't have done those things. I encouraged you and I acted badly. What did I expect you to do?"

And as she spoke she looked uneasy, not as she had before, confident and carefree, she seemed different.

"No Annia, please my behaviour was unforgivable, you have nothing to feel ashamed of, I'm the one who lost control and used you".

There was a painful silence for a moment, then he stood up.

"I think I'd better go, I have no right to expect anything from you. I am truly sorry. I'll keep away from the village. You need never see me again".

"Severus, don't go, I want to forgive you, can we start afresh. I want us to"

As Snape stood in the cold room, he felt a strange combination of sensations; stunned that she could even think of taking him back and an unimagined feeling of joy, could she really want him after he had abused her so.

He dropped to his knees before her and held her hands,

"Annia, I don't know what to say"

Then she touched his face and smiled, as he looked up into her beautiful face, his eyes met hers and he felt a warmth from those silvery eyes that was hard to resist. But he stood abruptly, letting go of her hand.

"I must go, please understand"

"Will you come back, tomorrow?" she asked.

And he nodded at her upturned face, as a flicker of candlelight illuminated her shimmering hair, and he knew he had to go before it was too late.

As he left the village Snape felt the burden of guilt lift, but he still had reservations about why she had been able to forgive him, how could she take him back, so he continued to his rooms somewhat bewildered by her reaction. Yet as he went to bed, he realised how much he wanted to see her again, tomorrow, and he went to sleep more easily than in weeks. But his dreams were filled with Annias' cries and protests from the night he had raped her.



The next morning, it was snowing again and the few children left in school over the Christmas holidays were enjoying all the usual pleasures of snow balling and sledging. As Snape washed and dressed he considered just what he would do today, he desperately wanted to see Annia and yet, would she be ready for him, would she still want him there in the cold light of day. By mid day the snow had stopped and he decided to walk up to Hogsmeade, the sun was shining now and it's reflected light off the snowy landscape was dazzling. The Inn was closed so he went down the narrow alley to Annia's cottage, and with some trepidation knocked on the door and waited uneasily for an answer. Then she was there standing before him and she invited him in with no apparent concern. The room was bright and warm from a large fire in the hearth and there was the smell of food cooking.

She took his icy hands and kissed him on the lips, then pulled away and led him to a seat by the fire, where the cold slowly left his body, while she put the food out for them to share and opened a bottle of Elderberry wine. She poured two glasses but Snape didn't touch his.

They spent the rest of day relaxing in each other's company and trying to put the turbulent start to their relationship behind them. She told him of how she had moved away from her family and how her uncle had helped her get a job and this cottage; they had much in common and shared a similar background; although neither revealed too much of themselves.

"Have you got to work tonight?" he enquired, later.

"No it's my night off"

Snape couldn't help reveal his feelings as his mouth showed a flicker of a smile and said, "Good"

Annia laughed softly at his reaction, then she got up and walked behind his chair and put her arms around his neck and whispered; "Severus, will you kiss me"

At that he guided her round to sit on his lap and he did as she asked, gently on her flushed ruby lips, so softly she could feel his breath as he controlled his desire. But then she started to unbutton his shirt and pushed her hands round his waist inside the open shirt and kissed him harder as she remained on his lap.

"I want us to start again, forget what happened, let this be the first time. Let's remember tonight".

And as she spoke he put his arms around her delicate curves and her burnished hair fell onto his face, so soft and silky; but she took his hands and placed them on the tiny pearl buttons of her satin blouse. He undid them deftly and with great attention, as each one revealed more of her ivory skin, until he reached the last one. Then his finger traced the opening back up to her throat and she lifted her head to let the finger move further up, where it outlined her mouth. And she let her tongue taste him.



She slipped his loose shirt off and led him to a tiny bedchamber off the room where they had eaten. A fire in the small hearth warmed the room, which was dominated by a sumptuous bed with soft drapes of deep russet red and luxurious swathes of magenta velvet.

She stepped out of her skirt and sat Snape on the edge of the bed, by now he was completely under her spell as she stood before him. She lifted his hands so that they touched the edge of her open blouse; he let his hands slide the silky garment off her shoulders and fall to the floor. His fine hands moved slowly from her shoulders down her spine, making her skin shiver with anticipation, until he reached the small of her back, then he pulled her gently towards him and kissed her stomach, then further down he licked her sensitive flesh.

Her whole body quivered at his delicate touch, her head dropped back and she let out a low moan while her hands dug deep into his back.

But then she took control again and knelt before him on the thick fur rug. She slowly unbuttoned his trousers and as she did her hair fell around her shoulders, across her breasts. She lay his naked, sinewy frame on the bed and knelt across his thighs, so that as she leant down towards his face her silken hair and smooth breasts brushed his firm torso.

Kissing his neck and chest she reached for his hands and their fingers interlocked. Snape squeezed her hands as he felt the warmth of her quim against his thigh and groaned as her body pressed down on him.

He felt as if he was shrouded in silk as Annias kisses covered his aching body. Her hand rested on the shaft of his penis and found it was hard and erect, so she guided it into her moist folds and looked down at her lover as he moaned in the grip of this long desired ecstasy.

He gazed up at this beautiful woman, her hair glinting, her cheeks flushed pink and her soft, pert breasts. Then she began to writhe and sway. He gripped her waist and pulled her down to his chest, but she flung her body back as they linked hands again. She arched her back and cried out, as his cock thrust deeper into her cunt, writhing back and forth, gasping as she reached her orgasmic convulsion. Then she flopped down onto Snapes hot, glistening, body, throbbing in the final thrusts of his ultimate rapture.

They lay together, motionless for some time, until sleep overtook their contentment.