Chapter 5. Destiny.

The weeks that followed found the Potions Master, brewing the Amyllus Potion numerous times but every time he did, there was a feeling of betrayal. His loyalty to the Headmaster was unflinching and Snape knew this was the kind of action Dumbledore would despise him for; creating a potion so beloved of the Death Eaters. A potion he had once brewed at the instruction of Lord Voldemort himself when Snape had first fallen under the spell of the absolute power of the man.

It sickened him to think of those two men together. The contrast between Dumbledore's benign authority and Voldemort's tyrannical rule of terror were all the more marked when he thought about how each had treated him over the years.

The Dark Lord had seduced him with an evil will that could corrupt the strongest mind and taint the purest soul. He seemed to take Snape's stubborn will as a personal challenge and he used every possible method to recruit the young man to his despicable circle.

Then, over two years ago now, when Snape had escaped Voldemort, it was the Headmaster who had guided him through that most traumatic period. He had counselled him and listened to him, without judging his most vile of actions. Dumbledore had even shown Snape affection, such, as he had never felt. In short, he had treated him like a son. He had become the father Snape had never known.

And now this was how he repaid that trust, all for a few moments of ecstasy with a woman he believed to be a sympathiser of Voldemorts. Yet a woman he loved, loved in a way he had never thought possible.

He vowed never to brew the illicit potion again and he would persuade Annia to come up to the castle, where Dumbledore could protect her from the Death Eater destiny she foresaw. But before he could speak to the Headmaster he needed to tell Annia of his plans, and how they could be together.

By now it was nearing the end of summer. A summer like no other, spent with his lover with nothing to disturb them from each other. Snape rarely entered the castle, except to make that intoxicating brew, all he needed was in those few simple rooms with Annia.

So the school was quiet and the grounds almost deserted, as he walked up to the village in daylight, undisturbed by any children and their inquisitive stares.

It was late afternoon as Snape took his usual place in the far corner of The Three Broomsticks.

Annia wandered over. "You're early, is everything OK?"

"Of course, my sweet, but I need to ask you something". He held her hand, as he spoke, she seemed concerned. "It's all right, don't look so worried". And he smiled at her.

A while later she came back over, "I'll be through soon, Madam Rosemerta says I can finish early today".

And he noticed the Landlady watching their intimate chat, shaking her head and looking a little bemused.

"Why don't you wait back at the house, I'll be there soon"



So he got up and left through the rear door. Annia's cottage seemed different without her there and so he sat and waited. He closed his eyes for a moment, almost drifting to sleep, but then something disturbed his peace and he shot up, but there was no one there. Yet he sensed something cold and menacing, a presence he'd never noticed before.

When Annia came in he said nothing of his, dream, if that's what it was.

She greeted him with a kiss and pulled him to his feet. As she started to lead him towards the bedchamber, he stopped her.

"I want to ask you something. This is important, please listen to what I have to say."

She pouted at him and looked for a moment like a little child and he pulled her close to him and said.

"Don't tease me, come on, sit down and then you can have you way."

As she sat he told her of his concerns and how he felt sure, if they told the Headmaster everything he would make sure she was safe.

"He'd do everything in his power to keep you from the Death Eaters, if I took you to him I feel certain he would protect you. You do understand why I want this, don't you?"

She didn't answer.

"Because of how I feel about you, Annia. I can't loose you, not to Voldemort" He watched her face with his searching eyes but she averted her gaze from the intensity of those glittering orbs.

"But I'm fine, Severus. I want us to be together but not at the school. I couldn't go there.

Please don't look at me that way, you don't understand. Stay here with me or we could go away, together. I know people who would help us, people who have power and influence, not like that old man. Severus, don't you see, we could be so strong if you choose the right path".

As she spoke her eyes flashed and Snape sat back, rocked by her reaction and the way she seemed so animated talking of this future she appeared to have mapped out.

"What are you saying? Become the Servants of Lord Voldemort?

Annia, I would never go back to that, never if my life depended on it. How could you even think such a thing" He was still stunned by her suggestion, but she retorted.

"But what about us, don't you want to be with me? This way nothing can come between us. I can take you back, you have so much to offer him".

He stood up slowly, his black eyes penetrating her impassioned expression and he backed away, reeling at her vile words. But then he flew towards her chair and put his hands on its arms, so they were face to face.



"Stop, now. You don't know what you're talking about. I will never serve that brute again. Annia, you haven't seen the things I have; the corrupt greed and the sickening violence, their total disregard for human life. A muggle tortured and murdered all in the name of some perverted game.

No Annia, not while I have free will, will I go to Voldemort" Snape virtually spat the name, his contorted face still close to Annia's.

Then he stood tall and headed for the door.

"I think it best if I go now. I'll come back later" As he spoke he looked straight at the door, not waning Annia to see his face.

"Wait, let me explain. Come and sit down, at least listen to me". She was in front of him now, barring his exit and she saw his face. He looked deathly pale and his eyes were red and swollen.

She grabbed his arms. He tried to throw her aside but she wouldn't let go, then suddenly she let him go and bent double, holding her stomach and gasping.

"What is it; what's happening?"

He held her up from behind as she buckled under some unseen force. She was panting hard and sweating, like a fever had suddenly attacked her.

Snape saw she was loosing consciousness so gathered her up, took her into the bedroom and placed her on the untidy jumble of covers. She was curled up tight but her breathing was becoming shallow, he felt her face, she was burning.

He spent the rest of the night there when she eventually fell asleep. In the morning he would take her to the castle, where he could attend to her himself, but tonight she must stay here. Snape paced the tiny room, not wanting to leave her for a moment, but she slept soundly now.

It was dawn when she stirred, with a choked cough that forced her back into the foetal position she had finally relaxed during the night.

Snape sat up from his resting-place, near the cold, empty fireplace as he heard Annia's strangled cough and sat besides her on the dishevelled bed.

He gently rubbed her back, but even that sensitive treatment made her flinch, so that he instinctively moved his hand away.

Slowly she uncurled herself and turned to see her companion, she looked shocked to see him there.

"Here drink this, it's just a simple tonic I managed to make, last night from a few things you had here. Go on, it should ease the pain a little."

She winced as she sat up but still looked uneasy and glanced nervously at the door.

He handed her the glass and she sipped the liquid tentatively. She screwed up her face as the bitter potion touched her lips.

"Not too good is it, but it was the best I could do. Can you talk now?"

There were still many questions he needed answering.

"Are you sure it's safe?" There was fear in the hoarse voice now, an uncertainty Snape had never heard before. Whatever it was last night that racked her with such pain had clearly affected her more than just a fever.

She sat curled up at the far side of her bed and began to recount how it had all started.

"He was a friend of the family and often visited, almost like an Uncle. I was only a girl when he first came and thought nothing of his attentions." As she spoke she looked hard at a place across the room, away from Snape, and her voice was shaky.

"I didn't know it was wrong, all I knew was he was hurting me and I couldn't tell anyone, not even my parents." She looked at him now, her eyes streaming. "

"Severus, I was 13 years old, he, he abused me." She reached out to him but he shot up, he looked numb, unable to react, at first.

"It was Voldemort, he raped me. That's how he controls me, he placed his curse on me then. And now he wants you!"

Pain was seeping back into her body, but she carried on. "He sent me here, to trap you and bring you back, do whatever it took to get you to return under your own free will. I had no choice, Severus, don't you see"

She knelt in front of him still on the bed, but he backed away a look of realisation on his tired and greying face.

"So when I did that to you, you took me back because you had to?"

He was no better than Voldemort, he had raped her too.

"This was just a plan to trap me. All that we've shared, everything was because of him? So I mean nothing to you?" The words stuck in his throat, all that he had thought of as beautiful and genuine, was conceived through a desire to destroy and corrupt him.

"No Severus, no! You mean everything to me. I fell in love with you. But now I'm trapped, don't you see. You have to go, leave while it's still safe. I don't know what will happen; what will happen to me. I don't know what this curse can do.

Please forgive me. Go to the castle, you'll be safe there. He knows that, that's why I can't go there. The curse will kill me if I get close to the Headmaster.

Dumbledore's the only one he fears." There was despair now in the week voice.

But he stepped towards her as she pleaded with her lover to go. He took her in his arms, she felt weak and frail, not as she had before, alert and vital. His kisses were soft and tender, as if, he were too passionate, she would wilt under the pressure of his lips.

"I'll come back tomorrow, with something to help you, help you recover, so we can fight this curse. I won't leave you, do you understand. I'll stay by your side, whatever happens."

She held on tightly, as if falling, but he was strong and made her feel safe. Yet he had to go, she had to survive this alone.

"Please go, now." She had to be strong too, so she pushed him away and cried.

"Go. And don't come back"

And she dropped back down onto the bed and buried her face into the pile of pillows.

He turned away from her cries, as he had done that first night there, and he thought of Voldemort; he too had defiled her. Now he shared another bond with this man who had haunted his thoughts and from whom he could never be free.

He knew now he had to see his mentor and confess his betrayal.