WHERE ARE YOU NOW?
A romance/angst Sailor Moon songfic to Britney Spears' "Where Are You Now?"
Written by Ice Dragoness
* * * * *
Raye Hino stood as the rain poured around her, outside the Hikawa Shrine. She had no umbrella and made no attempt to shield herself. As water dripped down her face, Raye recalled a day like this, but long ago.
It may have been three years ago, but it was unforgettable and fresh in her mind.
Calling out your name
Your face is everywhere
I'm reaching out to you
To find that you're not there
I wake up every night
To see the state I'm in
It's like an endless fight
I never seem to win
Raye blinked back tears bitterly. She had said ugly things to him that day . . . things he hadn't deserved. He'd done nothing but love her--a love she might not have admitted to wanting, but a love all the same.
I can't go on
As long as I believe
Can't let go
When I keep wondering . . .
What was he doing now? Raye wondered often if he'd dared to fall in love again. Had he found someone else after Raye had refused him innumerable times? Had he formed a better life than what the temple had been able to offer?
Where are you now?
What have you found?
Where is your heart
When I'm not around?
Tell me, where are you now?
You gotta let me know
Oh, baby, so I can let you go
Raye folded her arms across her chest, closing her eyes. And she began to imagine. . . .
What if she ran into him today? Raye knew the odds were slim-to-none, but she wondered if he would look, speak, smell the same way he had when she'd known him. Would he still play that awful guitar "music"?
Raye smiled a little, but it was a sad one. Because if she did run into him today--
What could she say to him?
I can hear your voice
The ring of yesterday
It seems so close to me
But yet so far away
I should let it out
To save what's left of me
Close the doors of doubt
Revive my dignity
Even the other Soldiers had noticed Raye's melancholic attitude. Just the week before, Mina had asked, "Do you still miss him? It sure seems like it." Raye had retorted sharply, but deep down she knew that Mina was right. If Mina the airhead could understand that, anyone could, and they would pity her.
Raye hated pity.
She angrily brushed away tears, but it was useless; she could distinguish the rain falling from herself crying.
I whoudl let it out
It's time to let you go
Oh, baby, I just wanna know . . .
Raye took a few deep breaths in an attempt to calm herself. Yes, she thought it was time to let go of her memories. But it was so difficult. Hope springs eternal, after all, and Raye constantly hoped that some day, some way, she would find him and apologize--at the very least.
Then maybe she could let go.
Where are you now?
What have you found?
Where is your heart
When I'm not around?
Tell me, where are you now?
You gotta let me know
Oh, baby, so I can let you go
