Part 9

Spike awoke feeling the warmth of Buffy's body nestled snuggly against his own. His expression reflected the wonder and amazement that he felt as he watched her sleep peacefully in his arms. He savored the idea that she was his, if only for a moment. He knew from past experience that when she woke up she might not be as overjoyed with their lovemaking as he was. He recalled the last time they had given into their attraction for one another and her reaction to it. The next morning, she had referred to their lovemaking as a 'freak show' and claimed she had only slept with him out of convenience. Her words had driven a stake into his heart and he had responded defensively, slinging back some cruel remarks of his own.

He heard the grandfather clock in the downstairs sitting room strike five. They needed to get up fast as the sun would be coming up in less than an hour. Sighing with regret, Spike got up and put his clothes on. He picked up the dress that Buffy had borrowed from his sister and noted that most of the buttons were missing. Shrugging nonchalantly, he flung the dress onto the nearest chair and strode over to the wardrobe to find her something else to wear. He found Buffy's leather skirt and white camisole top and put them carefully on the bed. He then found a black cloak for her to wear over her modern clothes and laid it down next to them. He glanced over at Buffy and to his surprise found that she was awake, quietly watching him. He braced himself in anticipation of a verbal onslaught but she remained silent.

"We need to get moving." Spike said quietly. He gestured to the window. "The sun will be up soon."

Still not speaking, Buffy rose from the bed without making any attempt at covering herself. To her surprise, Spike turned away quickly to let her get dressed. He looked unusually uncomfortable as he stood facing the door shifting his weight from one foot to the other and back again. Buffy glanced at the fidgeting vampire and found herself wanting to forget he was evil. She wanted to believe that he'd really changed because of his love for her. She thought about the way that he'd made love to her that night, the way his eyes had held hers as they connected both physically and emotionally. She wondered what would happen if she allowed herself to fall in love with him. She feared that loving Spike meant embracing the darkness that was a part of her and the source of her powers as the Slayer. She preferred not to think about that. Instead, she chose to reflect on how gentle and loving he had been that night, evoking in her such indescribable pleasure. It was getting more difficult for her to keep hating him. She wanted so much for him to be good. For now, she would allow herself the luxury of such a fantasy – but only for now.

As if to give his hands something to do, Spike reached into his coat pocket and pulled out the little cloth pouch Willow had given him. "Red says we're not to change the past," he said uncomfortably while Buffy dressed herself. "She gave me this memory spell to use in case it was necessary to make anyone forget about our presence here. I suppose we should use it on William and the rest of the family."

"It's just William and Cathy, the housekeeper," Buffy replied while zipping up her skirt. "The rest of the family is on vacation." She slipped on her skimpy camisole and cleared her throat. "You can turn around now."

Spike turned around to face Buffy but still felt uncharacteristically awkward. "Well, I suppose I should go and take care of this spell thing then," he said finally.

"So how does it work? Will it make William forget everything about me?"

Spike shrugged. "I suppose."

"Doesn't seem like my meeting him would have any impact on the future though." Buffy thought again about the way Spike had touched her that night. She felt a cold knot in her stomach as she wondered if performing the spell would somehow alter the way he felt about her. She knew she was thinking irrationally but what if erasing William's memory of her meant ultimately erasing Spike's love? As much as it surprised her, she realized that she was beginning to accept the reality of his love and even welcome it. She still couldn't identify the nature of her own feelings for him but she knew with certainty that his advances were no longer undesired.

"Yeah, well I guess it wouldn't have any major effect…but Willow was pretty specific. It won't take but a few minutes…which are getting pretty numbered by the way," Spike replied impatiently.

"I'll do it." Buffy grabbed the pouch. "What do I need to do?"

"Just sprinkle a some the herbs on them and tell them to forget."

The Slayer headed out the door toward William's room. "I'll be right back."

Buffy entered William's room, tiptoed to his bed and watched him sleep for a few seconds. She sat down on the edge of his bed, opened the pouch and took out the herbs it contained. Gently, she scattered them over the sleeping man. "Forget I was here," she whispered quietly. She stood up to go but then changed her mind and sat down again. "Maybe just remember a little – about me. And remember that you WILL love me one day." She then took a ring off her finger, kissed it and put it in his hand. Quickly, she left his room to perform the spell on Cathy.