Chapter 2: Bad Weather Ahead
(Mario,
Wario, Luigi, and Waluigi walk up the gangplank and onto Wario's
ship. Mario goes into the cabin and starts unpacking his stuff. Luigi
is standing nearby.)
Mario: Let's see...tennis balls...check.
Tennis racket...check. Luigi's tennis racket...check. Luigi's
pajamas? Luigi, what's this doing in here?!?
(Mario pulls out a
white pair of pajamas with little green L's all over them.)
Luigi:
I wanted to take a nap.
Mario: Well you don't need pajamas for
that. Quit embarrassing us! I bet the person reading this is laughing
at us!
(Luigi walks outside the cabin and saw Wario messing with
the steering wheel. Luigi goes over to him.)
Wario: Hey Luigi!
Will you ask Waluigi why we're not going anywhere?
Luigi: Sure.
Where is he?
Wario: I think he's on the starboard side.
(Luigi
walks away before Wario finishes his sentence. He quickly finds
Waluigi near the back of the ship. Waluigi was looking at the dark
clouds with a smile on his face.)
Waluigi: It's almost
time.
Luigi: Almost time for what?
Waluigi: Almost time to go
to the island, silly.
Luigi: Oh. Wario wanted me to ask you why
we're not going anywhere.
Waluigi: Er...I don't know yet.
(After
Waluigi said this, Luigi saw the answer: the ship was still tied to
the dock.)
Luigi: Yo Stick Figure. You forgot to untie the
rope.
Waluigi: What the? What did you call me? Grrrrr!
(Waluigi
chases Luigi, but his quarry got dashed away. Waluigi goes back to
untie the rope.)
Waluigi: (muttering)You can run this time, but it
will be your last.
(Later everyone is in the cabin talking to one
another. It is starting to rain outside.)
Mario: Luigi, what the
heck did you do to Waluigi to make him chase you?
Wario: Yeah.
What did you do?
Luigi: I called him Stick Figure.
(Mario
laughs. Wario finally has something to laugh about too.)
Wario:
Why did you call him that?
Luigi: Because he looks like
one.
Waluigi: Luigi is a jerk.
Luigi: I am not! I never call
anyone Lard Butt!
Mario: Wait a minute! Wario, how are you
steering this thing?
(Outside the waves become rough and the rain
comes down harder. There was some lightning and then a clap of
thunder! Luigi jumped so high he hit the ceiling, then comes crashing
down on Wario.)
Wario: You wussy! Watch where you're jumping will
ya?
Luigi: Wario! We must turn back! Now!
Wario: Don't worry.
I'll see what I can do. (muttering) Not.
(Wario carefully goes
outside. The other three follow. Now a strong wind is blowing and
there is more thunder and lightning.)
Luigi: Retreat!
Retreat!
(And that is exactly what they did, but Waluigi closed
the door before Luigi had the chance to get in, then Waluigi locked
it. Remember, this was part of his plan.)
Luigi: You guys let me
in! You guys! Guys! Let me in! Mama mia.
Waluigi: Hey Wario. Do
you hear something?
Wario: I don't think so. Do you?
Waluigi:
Only the sea and th-
Mario: Well I do! That's Luigi! You locked
him out!
Waluigi: No I didn't. Luigi is a wuss! He never went
outside. I bet he's hiding under the bed.
Mario: He's not a wuss!
He's just timid. Hey look out the window! There he is!
(Sure
enough there, just outside the window, was a very frightened looking
Luigi, still holding the doorknob for dear life. Waluigi walks over
to the door and fiddles around with the lock pretending to try to
unlock the door.)
Waluigi: This lock thingy isn't working. It
won't turn.
Mario: Don't be such a darn idiot Waluigi. Move
it!
(Mario shoves Waluigi to the side and easily unlocks the door.
Unfortunately Luigi has already lost his grip on the doorknob and is
now hanging dangerously close to the water. One more slip up or gust
of wind and it could be the end for the little plumber.)
Luigi:
Help me!
Mario: Hang on Luigi! I'm coming!
Luigi: Hurry!
(Mario
tries to step outside the cabin, but the wind blew him back inside.
Mario tries again and that darn wind blew him inside again.)
Mario:
Hmmm? I know how to get out of here!
(Mario runs over to his
backpack and digs into it, then pulls out...the Metal Cap! Mario puts
it on and transforms into Metal Mario, then he runs
outside.)
Waluigi: (whispering) Wario, we have to use plan
B.
Wario: Plan B? What's plan B?
(Waluigi slaps Wario in the
face.)
Waluigi: You know what I'm talking about!
Wario: Oh!
That's right. I remember now.
(Wario runs out the door. Creeping
close to the wall, Wario makes his way to where the life saver were.
Since Luigi was on the port side Wario tossed all the life savers off
the starboard side which was nowhere near Luigi. M.M. Moves over to
Luigi and holds out his right hand.)
M.M. stands for Metal
Mario. Duh!
M.M.: Grab my hand!
Luigi: Kay. I'll try.
(Luigi
lunges out to grab M.M.'s hand but missed. Luigi tried again. This
one missed too. Luigi lunges out yet again. This time he got a hold
of his target. Waluigi wasn't out of tricks yet. Waluigi runs outside
and pulls M.M.'s hat down so he can't see.)
M.M.: Hey! What
the?!
(M.M. goes to swat Waluigi and lets go of Luigi
instead.)
Luigi: Mama miaaaahhhh!
(Splash! Luigi falls into the
water. Luigi tries to swim back to the ship, but the waves were too
rough. As Luigi struggles in the water, M.M. manages to hit Waluigi
in the face with a steel fist.)
Waluigi: Ow! My nose! You broke my
nose!
Wario: Hey Metal Barfio! Quit hitting my brother and try
saving yours
M.M.: Oh no! Luigi!
Wario: I'd give you some life
savers to toss, but I don't have any.
M.M.: No life savers?!
Luigi! Hang on to one of these!
Waluigi: Hang on to one of
what?
(M.M. runs towards Luigi, who is still struggling in the
water, then M.M. fires some kind of ice breath at the water creating
little icebergs.)
Luigi: I don't think...I can keep...this up
much...longer.
(Luigi went underwater for about seconds, then
reappears. Luigi tried to grabbing icebergs, but he couldn't get any.
Finally he went underwater again. This time he didn't come
back.)
M.M.: No! Luigi! Noooooo!
Wario: Mama mia!
Waluigi:
He's gone. Luigi's gone!
M.M.: My brother! Gone!
(M.M., Wario,
and Waluigi walk into the cabin. Wario closes the door.)
Wario: Yo
Barfio! This is for hitting my brother!
(Wario goes to punch M.M.
Of course punching a plumber made of dense metal isn't the best idea
because instead of Wario hurting M.M., Wario hurts himself.)
Wario:
Ow! Ouch, ouch, ouch!
M.M.: Serves you right. Such a weak punch
can't put a dent in my armor.
Waluigi: I bet I can put a dent
in.
Wario: Waluigi! No!
(It was too late. Waluigi had already
kicked M.M. and is now holding his foot and yelping in
pain.)
Waluigi: Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!
M.M.: Idiot.
