DISCLAIMER: Gundam Wing and its characters belong to Sotsu, Sunrise, and Bandai. Mattresses and sheep are property of the Serta® company.
Important Note
: Hiho! I'm writing this while currently drunk on SOBE® Energy Elixir and watching commercials. I am not in my right mind at the moment. Please leave a message after the beep...(beep)


Wufei & the Injustice of the Serta Sheep
By Waltz195


It was a day like any other at the Earth Sphere Unified Nation's Preventers Headquarters.

Preventer Wind was busily typing up reports for the conference on the Mars Terraforming Project. Preventer Fire was currently instructing trainee agents in the military drill hall. Preventer Water was in the infirmary, checking the stock of medical supplies. And Preventer Chang, former Gundam pilot, was busy doing what he always did on days like this.

Stuck in the Public Relations office, redirecting calls to their respective lines. In other words, being a switchboard operator.

"INJUSTICE!" The angry shout echoed in the room, which was empty, save for himself.

"Why am I, Chang Wufei, descendent of the honorable Dragon Clan, assigned to such a lowly position!" he growled, to no one in particular. "This is dishonorable! Being an operator is weak! I am not weak!"

BRRRRING!

"Hello, Preventers Headquarters, how may I redirect your call?" Wufei gritted out, trying to keep his loathsome tone in check.

"Wufei?"

The irate former Gundam pilot was momentarily disconcerted. "Who wants to know?"

"AHHAHAHAHAHA! I can't believe it! The almighty Chang Wufei is stuck on operator duty! AHAHAHAHAHA!"

Wufei recognized the voice on the line. "Maxwell..." he growled.

"Shinigami at your service, Justice-Boy." Wufei would bet his katana that the braided baka was grinning over the phone.

"What do you want, baka?" he asked impatiently. "I have calls to redirect. I don't have time for your nonsense."

"Oh, right." Wufei could still hear him chuckling. "I need to speak with Sally. Got those med stats she wanted."

What Wufei was about to say next, which he only did because it was required, Duo would never let him live down.

"Your call will be redirected shortly." Wufei cringed. "Thank you and have a nice day."

A second later, the sound of uproarous laughter could be heard, as Wufei redirected the lines, before slamming down the offending handset.

"That braided baka. What does he know? Just because there are no missions currently available...doesn't mean I have to stay in this dishonorable situation." Wufei grumbled, still stingy from that blow to his pride.

He looked over at the wall clock and noticed he was due for a break.

"Anything to get out of that insufferable office..." he thought as he made his way to the vending machine outside the hall.

As he surveyed the contents of the machine, he wondered if he could possibly get away with starting a war. Not a big war. Something small. A tiny revolution wouldn't hurt. Just so he'd be back on active duty again. This time of peace, though decidedly pleasant, was boring him. His warrior's blood was longing to see some action.

Sighing heavily, Wufei opted to buy a "power bar". As he was purchasing his snack, some rather interesting events were starting to unfold outside.

A large multitude of wool clad individuals were gingerly making their way to the office entrance, as if uncertain of their actions. They milled about restlessly, gazing at their leader with slight anxiety.

"Earl, are you sure about this?" One of the masses questioned, uncertainty reflected in his round, blue eyes.

"Of course, I'm sure!" The one named Earl answered, filled with determination. "We will never be taken seriously, unless we take this matter all the way to the top!"

"Yeah..." A fellow advocate ventured timidly. "But will they listen to us? You know what happened last time."

Earl's mouth was set in a grim line. "I know. Those who have forsaken us will pay their dues when the time comes!"

The horde of whitewashed individuals plodded toward the building and determinely walked inside.

Meanwhile...back with Wufei...

Wufei was thoroughly engrossed with chewing his nearly inedible "power bar", when the most unusual thing he had ever seen happened.

"What in the name of Nataku!" he sputtered, as a herd of sheep (as indicated in the title) sauntered into the front office, which unfortunately was currently occupied only by himself.

One sheep in particular, who seemed to be leading the bunch, looked over in his general direction, its brown eyes narrowed and harsh. What happened next totally threw the Preventer agent off guard.

It spoke.

"You there! With the power bar. Who do we talk to to make a public complaint?"

The world spun on its axis and was submerged into darkness, as Preventer Chang Wufei unceremoniously fainted.


Author's Notes: ...Surprise?...