Christmas Without The Merry pt2
Disclaimer: I do not own the Christmas holiday or any of its season stuff (e.g. songs, Santa Claus, TV specials etc). I also do not own "I can't believe it's not butter" or "Mr muscle".
A/N: I'm glad you guys enjoyed the first part. You'll have a few more laughs if you like slapstick and witty comments…methinks ^_^()
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In another part of the house…
"Gohan, we have to tell them!" Videl exclaimed.
"But sweetie, my mother will flip if I tell her that we are engaged!" Gohan said. Videl frowned.
"Are you that ashamed of me?!" Videl demanded.
"No hun! Of course not!" Gohan said and swallowed hard. "I'll tell her now."
"Really Gohan?" Videl asked as she glomped him.
"Erm, sure!" Gohan laughed nervously. They walked back into the living room when Goku rushed in with an unconscious Chi-Chi in his arms.
"Goku you dog! What were you two up to?" Yamcha smirked. Goku blushed.
"Nothing Yamcha! She just fell to the floor!" Goku protested.
"Ha! Kakarrot finally did it! He killed his devil spawn wife!" Vegeta smirked. Everyone looked at Goku with wide eyes.
"I didn't!" Goku insisted.
"Dad how could you?" Gohan asked.
"Son-kun!!" Bulma yelled.
"Son…" Piccolo said shocked and to some degree impressed.
"I didn't do it! I could never kill Chi-Chi!" Goku yelled. Krillin took this as the perfect opportunity to embarrass Goku further.
"Oh really?" Krillin asked slyly. "Why not?" Goku blinked and then blushed again.
"Never you mind!" Goku said laying her down on the couch.
"Wait a second, if mamma can't wake up then who's gonna cook us dinner?" Goten asked.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" Bulma yelled as she rushed to the phone and pulled out the Yellow Pages.
"This has certainly been an interesting day…" #18 said, resuming to read her magazine. There was a knock at the door and when Trunks opened it, Master Roshi and Oolong were there.
"Hey gang!" Roshi exclaimed.
"As if this day couldn't get any worse…" Piccolo muttered and went into meditation.
A couple of hours later…
"WAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!" Bulma wailed as the others cringed. "I can't find a cook to cook for us!! They're all booked!"
"Bulma be quiet! Chi-Chi needs her rest!" Goku shushed.
"Well, why don't you cook for us?" #18 asked. Vegeta, Krillin and Yamcha all shook their heads frantically. Bulma scowled.
"I don't have the time to even if I wanted to! There's too much to do!" Bulma said.
"Ah, I live to see another day…" Krillin sighed. Bulma whipped a mallet out of hammer space and hit him over the head with it.
"Hmm, better her than me." #18 smirked.
"Gee, thanks honey." Krillin muttered. Vegeta threw down the TV remote and stood up.
"Onna, enough of your whining. I am a Saiya-jin, I am a prince and above all I am a man!" Vegeta declared.
"What's your point?" Bulma asked.
"My point is that I can cook this dinner just fine! There's no reason that I can't cook and baste some stupid bird!" Vegeta said. Goten suddenly paled.
"We eat bird on Christmas?!" He asked with a look on his face that signalled 'I wanna cry'.
"Of course Goten! We eat turkey." Gohan replied, smiling. Goten paled even further.
"We eat turkey?!" Goten exclaimed.
"Of course! What did you think we ate?" Gohan asked.
"I thought it was chicken." Goten replied innocently.
"But chicken is a bird too…oops." Gohan said as Goten eyes filled with water.
"So, you think you can cook a whole Christmas dinner, hmm? This coming from a man who until this morning didn't even know what snow was!!" Bulma yelled. The others started to laugh at Vegeta.
"Shut up!!" Vegeta yelled. "Just for that, the rest of you can come and cook all the menial food in the kitchen."
"NANI?!?!" They all exclaimed. #18 walked up to Vegeta and stared him down in the eye.
"I have to do what?" #18 icily said.
"You do nothing!" Vegeta hastily replied. "I want no women in my kitchen!! That includes Yamcha."
"Hey! I'll have you know that I can…" Yamcha started to say.
"SHUT UP!!" Vegeta yelled.
"Fine. I'll just go and get a camera then." Yamcha said as he started to get up.
"What for?" Goku asked.
"I wanna see what Vegeta looks like when he singes his eyebrows." Yamcha laughed. "I wonder if it'll qualify for a Kodak moment." Vegeta growled.
"Baka human."
About ten minutes later…
Vegeta, Krillin, Piccolo, Gohan, Roshi and Oolong stood in the massive kitchen. Krillin sighed.
"This is gonna be hard." He said.
"Nonsense! Now, I'm gonna cook the turkey since Kakarrot is trying to revive the wife he killed."
"I DID NOT KILL MY WIFE!!" Goku yelled from the living room. The others sweat-dropped.
"Anyway…the Namek will assist me. Kakarrot's brat and the midget formerly seen as bald will prepare all the little side dishes. Pig and old guy will make the desserts." Vegeta ordered.
"Wait a sec, I thought Goten was Kakarrot's brat." Gohan said.
"No that's you. He is Kakarrot's second brat." Vegeta replied. He pulled out the cookbook and started to read it. "Okay, I need to get a turkey, stuff it, baste it with butter and put it in the oven."
"I guess I'll make the stuffing then." Piccolo muttered as he walked off. Yamcha peered his head in the doorway.
"Hey guys, are you sure you don't need my help? After all I did used to…" Yamcha tried to say but Vegeta interrupted him.
"GO AWAY ONNA!" Vegeta said. Yamcha rolled his eyes and walked off.
"Okay Krillin, let's make some side dishes." Gohan declared.
"Um, Gohan…what are the side dishes?" Krillin asked. Gohan looked stumped. He put his hand behind his head and laughed sheepishly.
"To tell you the truth I don't know! We usually just eat it all without looking at what it is!" Gohan laughed. Krillin face-faulted. Vegeta and Piccolo looked inside the massive freezer and saw seven turkeys.
"Why on Earth would the onna have seven turkeys?" Vegeta asked.
"Well you Saiya-jins eat so much I guess she had to." Piccolo replied. Vegeta took one out and proceeded to stuff it with the 'stuffing' that Piccolo had prepared.
"Humans are weird. I have no idea why they would choose to stuff their food with cotton wool drowned in Worcester sauce." Vegeta shook his head.
In Trunks' room…
"How are we gonna stop Santa Claus? He sees everything we're doing!" Marron exclaimed.
"Yah, but I've estimated that he needs to get some sleep if he's going to be travelling all night long." Trunks explained.
"Oh!" The other two said. Trunks looked over at Marron and frowned.
"Sorry blondie but you're gonna have to wait outside." Trunks said, pushing Marron outside. Marron looked up at him with hurt eyes.
"But why?" Marron asked. Trunks sighed and pointed to a sign on the door then slammed the door in her face. She blinked and looked at the sign.
"WELL THAT DOESN'T MAKE ANY DIFFERENCE TO ME COZ I CAN'T READ YET!!" Marron yelled at the top of her little voice. Trunks opened the door again and sighed.
"It says no females allowed!" Trunks said in an exasperated voice.
"Well I'm not a female, I'm a little girl." Marron said as she pushed her way past. Trunks sighed as Goten grinned at him.
"You've got to give her credit. For a kid, she sure is smart." Goten commented.
"Shut up Goten! Okay, now here's the plan. He's gonna come down through the chimney right? So, what we do is…"
In Bulma's office…
"Are you sure it's no problem Yajirobe?" Bulma asked over the phone.
"No sweat Bulma, as long as I get some of that Christmas dinner!" Yajirobe said, licking his lips. "I'll wear the Santa suit over and climb down the chimney at around midnight ok?" Yajirobe confirmed.
"Ok, bye!" Bulma said hanging up the phone. She grinned. "This is gonna be the best party ever!"
To Be Continued…
Is Bulma right? Will this be the best party ever? Or will it be the worst? Why is Chi-Chi unconscious? What is Yamcha trying to tell them?! WHAT WILL HAPPEN TO YAJIROBE?!?! Ahem, stay tuned ^_^
