1 _~*THE TWELVE DAYS OF CHRISTMAS- GUNDAM WING STYLE*~_

Author's note: Ah, my very first GW fic! *sigh* Gundam Wing just finsihed in my neck of the woods ;_; (well, OK, we still have Endless Walts to go, but still!)

Disclaimer: I owneth nothing! Except this potato. *hugs her vegetable* Don't worry Mr. Potato. everything's going to be aaaaalright! *takes another cup of sugar-loaded, caffine boosted soft drink*

Anyway, on with the show!

(sung to The 12 days of Christmas)

2 On the first day of Christmas a Gundam sent to me-

A bishounen who was so pretty!

Zechs: *waves*

On the second day of Christmas a Gundam sent to me-

Two waring forces

Earth nation: Bloody colonies! *shoots them*

Colonies: Bloody earthlings! *sends mobile dolls down to Earth*

And a bishounen who was so pretty!

Zechs: *sings* I'm a model, ya know what I mean, I like to shake my little tush on the catwalk! *shakes his bum*

Friezaess: Woohoo, you go Zechs!

On the third day of Christmas a Gundam sent to me-

A couple of catchy theme songs

Singer: Just wild beat, communication!

Two waring forces

Colonies: Hyuck hyuck, let's crash this here spaceship into them earthlings! *everyone does the chicken dance*

And a bishounen who was so pretty!

Zechs: I'll show you my sword if you show me your big bazookas!

On the fourth day of Christmas a Gundam sent to me-

Four mobile dolls

*mobile dolls immediately start attacking everything around them*

Friezaess: Oops! ^_^;

A couple of catchy theme songs

Singer: It's just love!

Two waring forces

Trieze: Oh great, now that Relina's gone to visit the colonies I can't watch her in the shower anymore . Damn those bastards!

And a bishounen that was so pretty!

Zechs: I wasn't flirting Noin, honest!

On the fifth day of Christmas a Gundam sent to me-

*clears throat*

FIIIIIIIIIVE GUNDAM BOYS!

*Quatre, Heero, Duo, Wufei and Trowa appear out of thing air*

Heero: What the fu-

Friezaess: He means, uh, fu-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la!

Four mobile dolls

*mobile dolls stomp on a few thousand people*

A couple of catchy theme songs

Singer: *insert random Japanese lyrics here* Tonight!

Two waring forces

*Libra gets attacked by mobile dolls and begins to tremble*

Dorothy: *is putting on her make up when the vibrations cause her to smear her lipstick* Oh no, not again! And they wonder how I got eyebrows like this.

And a bishounen who was so pretty!

Zechs: I'M GOING TO KILL YOU ALL. right after I shampoo my hair ^_^!

On the sixth day of Christmas a Gundam sent to me-

Six angry colonies

Angry colonies: We're angry! ^_^

FIIIIIIIVE GUNDAM BOYS!

Trowa: *looking completely emotionless and out of it, as per usual*

Duo: Trowa, are you stoned again?

Trowa: Hee hee hee! Look at the little pink unicorn sitting on my shoulder! *takes another puff*

Four mobile dolls

*mobile doll pilots decide to go for a swim- whilst still in their dolls. As a result, a massive tidal wave wipes out a couple of thousand people*

Three catchy theme songs

Singer: Oh yay, I get to sing another song about sex!

Zechs: Did someone call me?

Two waring forces

White Fang: Hello! Did ya miss us? ^_^

And a bishounen who was so pretty!

Zechs: *flexes his muscles, causing most of the female audience - and some of the male members too - to fall into a hypnotic daze*

On the seventh day of Christmas a Gundam sent to me-

Seven crates of artillery

Overweight delivery guy wearing super-short shorts: Sign here please ma'am.

Friezaess: *signs the paper on the clipboard*

Delivery guy: *over his shoulder* Okay, bring 'em in!

*a truck dumps several huge crates containing weapons into Friezaess's front garden*

Friezaess: Aw man, not on the daisies!

Six angry colonies

Angry colonies: We're still angry! *blows up random targets on Earth*

FIIIIIIIIVE GUNDAM BOYS!

Quatre: Why is my name spelt 'Quatre' but pronounced 'Catra'?

Wufei: I do not know.

Four mobile dolls

*mobile dolls skip across the countryside picking wildflowers*

Three catchy theme songs

Singer: You mean I was singing in Japanese? Wow, howzabout that!

Two waring forces

Earth: Prepare for trouble!

Colonies and White Fang: Make it double!

Team Rocket: Hey! That's our line!

And a bishounen who was so pretty!

Zechs: Hey, my name *does* sound like s-

On the eighth day of Christmas a Gundam sent to me-

Eight hentai doujinshis

Friezaess: *blushes* How did they get there? ^_^;

Seven crates of artillery

Friezaess: *decorates the crate with flowers and that hideous little garden gnome she has in her front yard*

Six angry colonies

Angry colonies: We tried stress management, but it just didn't work- we ended up blowing the clinic up.

FIIIIIIIVE GUNDAM BOYS!

Duo: Okay, why didn't anyone ever tell me this outfit makes me look like a priest?! Man, no wonder none of the girls wanted to flirt with me .

Four mobile dolls

*mobile dolls pick up cars (with the people still inside) and make 'broom broom' noises*

Three catchy theme songs

Singer: Oops, I did it again! I played with your heart, got lost in the game!

Friezaess: Okay, maybe not quite as catchy as they used to be.

Two waring forces

Colonies: *uses massive speakers to transmit Aaron Carter music to the Earth, causing all Earthlings to scratch and claw at their ears in an attempt to avoid it*

And a bishounen who was so pretty!

Zechs: Oh, I know I am!

On the ninth day of Christmas a Gundam sent to me-

Nine Gundam model kits

Friezaess: Ooo, Bandai fresh!

Eight hentai doujinshis

Friezaess: *reading* Wow, I never knew people could bend that way O_o!

Seven crates of artillery

*crates are now covered in an assortment of sickly pastel flowers*

Friezaess: There, that looks better!

Six angry colonies

Angry colonies: We're gonna pound the crap outta them!

Random bystander: Who's 'them'?

Angry colonies: Uh. um. damn!

FIIIIIIIVE GUNDAM BOYS!

Heero: Let's play 'Pin the ponytail on the Duo'! *grabs Duo's ponytail and cuts it off*

Duo: Nooooooooo!!!

Four mobile dolls

*mobile dolls trip over an oil tanker left carelessly in the middle of the road and cause a small earthquake*

Three catchy theme songs

Singer: A hundred bottles of beer on the wall, a hundred bottles of beer.

Two waring forces

Earth Nation: Maybe if we just sneak up behind 'em and take away their cable TV.

And a bishounen who was so pretty!

Zechs: Hahaha! I didn't die at the end of Gundam Wing! So there ^_^!

On the tenth day of Christmas a Gundam sent to me-

Ten thousand oppressed colonists

Oppressed colonists: Not to be confused with 'angry colonies'!

OZ: Shaddap ya losers!

Nine Gundam model kits

Friezaess: *carefully constructing a Tallgeese, only to accidentally glue her fingers to the model*

Eight hentai doujinshis

Quatre: Hey guys! Look what the author's reading!

Friezaess: *quickly hides the doujinshis behind her back* Who, me? ^_^;

Seven crates of artillery

Friezaess: *pant, pant* All this self-insertion is wearing me out!

Six angry colonies

Angry colonies: Maybe we should try one of those stress balls.

FIIIIVE GUNDAM BOYS!

Duo: *crying over the loss of his beloved ponytail*

Wufei: *swinging it around over his head* Round and round and round it goes, where it stops, nobody knows! *accidentally whacks Trowa in the face with it*

Trowa: Trippy, man!

Four mobile dolls

Mobile doll pilot: This cockpit reeks Man, I knew I shouldn't have eaten that last helping of baked beans.

Three catchy theme songs

Singer: And I knooooow that my heart will go ooooooooooon.

Celiene Dion: Hey, that's my song you bitch! *strangles her with Duo's ponytail*

Two waring forces

Zechs: Anyone feel like crashing into Earth today?

White Fang: Yaaaay!

And a bishounen who was so pretty!

Zechs: What do you mean 'was'?!

On the eleventh day of Christmas a Gundam sent to me

Eleven attempts at peace

Relina: We have finally managed to come up with a way to determine peace amongst the Earth and the colonies. Alright everybody- scissors, paper, rock!

Ten thousand oppressed colonists

OZ leader: Oh colonists!

Colonists: But we just *gave* you a foot rub!

Nine Gundam model kits

Friezaess: *sawing off her finger in an attempt to detach herself from the table* Stupid PVA glue.

Eight hentai doujinshis

Heero: Who's that person with Zechs?

Trowa: You.

Heero: HOLY SH-

Seven crates of artillery

Friezaess: Hm. I wonder what'd happen If I opened it. *picks up a crowbar and pries open the lid*

Six angry colonies

Angry colonies: *singing Maralyn Manson songs and walking around in Goth gear*

FIIIIIVE GUNDAM BOYS!

Quatre: *distraught* Hey guys, I've lost my Gundam!

Heero: Have you checked down the back of the couch?

Quatre: *reaches down the back of the couch, gropes around, and eventually pulls out his Gundam* Never mind!

Four Mobile dolls

Mobile dolls: *grabbing an ice cream at the local shopping centre*

Three catchy songs

Singer: *leaves to find a Karaoke bar*

Two waring forces

Earth nation: You're a bunch of poo-poo heads!

Colonies: We know you are, but what are we?

Earth nation: Poo-poo heads!

Colonies: We know you are, but what are we?

Earth nation: Poo-poo heads!

Colonies: We know you are, but what are we?

Earth nation: . Damn, they're good.

And a bishounen that was so pretty!

Friezaess: Well, aside from that time he had a bad case of acne. Now you know why he *really* wore that mask!

Zechs: Hey, you promised you wouldn't tell! ;_;

On the twelfth day of Christmas a Gundam sent to me-

The copyrights to Gundam Wing!

Heero: What does that mean?

Zechs: It means that she now owns us! She's in control our every move!

Friezaess: Reeeeeeally? :)

Eleven attempts at peace

Relina: *dancing* Can't. stop. doing. the macerena!

Friezaess: *grins evilly*

Ten thousand oppressed colonists

OZ and the colonists: *are about to go into a fully-fledged war but instead hold hands and start singing* How many isles must a man walk down, before you can call him a man? *a certain author cackles in the background*

Nine Gundam model kits

Friezaess: *finally completes her model and, due to the change in copyrights, turns it into the real thing* Mwahaha!

Eight hentai doujinshis

Trowa: Hey man, you're really hot.

Duo: Ah! What the. it's almost like those doujinshis about us are becoming real! But how?

Friezaess: *is laughing her ass off*

Seven crates of artillery

Friezaess: *unleashes the weapons on The Fourth Wall- all of a sudden, the cast of Sailor Moon, Dragon Ball Z, Cardcaptors and Pokemon appear*

Six angry colonies

Angry colonies: Hey look, it's Sailor Moon! Woohoo! *start to sing* Happy happy, joy joy, happy happy, joy joy!

FIIIIIVE GUNDAM BOYS!

Wufei: Can someone please explain to me why we're wearing these tight little speedos all of a sudden?

Tracey (from Pokemon): Hey, you boys look hot!

Wufei: Eek!

Four Mobile Dolls

*mobile dolls suddenly turn around to see none other than.*

Frieza: You guys cannot possibly beat me because I am the most powerful being in the Universe and I can beat anyone who challenges me using only a fraction of my strength and Sayans suck and-

Zarbon: Just blow them up already.

Frieza: Oh, OK. *blows up the mobile dolls*

Three catchy tunes

Singer: *sings* I'm Sakuuuuura, I'm just a giiiiiiiirl-a, and I found a magic book. *speaking* Hey, this isn't 'Cardcaptors'!

Friezaess: It is now!

Two waring forces

Earth nation: We're going to come up there and kick your a. *has a sudden change of heart* Oh, we're so sorry for being nasty to you all those years!

Colonies: *crying* That's alright, we forgive you!

Together: *singing* I love you, you love me, we're a happy family!

And a bishounen who is so pretty

Friezaess: You know, now that I own the copyrights, I can do what ever I want to you, my sexy Zechsy!

Zechs: OH FU-

*transmission cut*