Chapter 4: Disappointment
By Joryuu

//And life goes on
And life goes on//

Heero stayed, standing above the bed. Duo looked up at him sleepily. Heero could just barely see his violet eyes in the dim light. "Heero, are ya gonna climb in or what?"
"Hn.."
"Are you still doin' that? C'mon! I'm not gonna be able to sleep with you lookin' down at me like that! Get in bed or go back to the couch."
Heero slowly, got into the bed beside Duo. Duo pulled his messy blankets over the two of them and closed his eyes to sleep. Heero reached for the other boy, pulling him close into an embrace. "Duo, remember, this is for one night only. Right now I don't think I can deal with more. I still love you though. I want you to always remember that. No matter how much of an idiot I can be, I still love you..."
"I won't forget Heero... I love you too..." Duo replied sleepily. With that, Heero pulled Duo even closer, then he pressed his lips to the braided boy's. Duo inhaled sharply, but the kiss was too short for him to respond at all. "Mmm.. Heero you smell good..." were Duo's last words until at last, sleep consumed him. Heero however, couldn't bring himself to fall asleep. He wouldn't let himself fall asleep actually. He couldn't let this moment end too quickly. He wanted to embrace it forever. Tonight, Duo was his.
He breathed in the light, musky scent Duo had. He was wearing a spicy cologne earlier, now the smell of that and the natural smell of Duo had mixed together, giving a scent Heero would never forget. Duo's scent was just so intoxicating. Heero never wanted to let the sweet aroma to leave his nostrils.
He breathed in deeply, thinking of how the next day, this would all end. Heero didn't like that idea. He wanted to stay like this forever. With Duo by his side but God only knew that he couldn't. The emotions would be too hard to deal with right now. Too hard....
But why did they have to be so hard to handle for him? It wasn't all emotions though, just the ones like friendship, caring, and love. It was awful not being able to deal with that like a normal person and Heero ached to be able to. But he just couldn't.
Maybe with having Duo as a friend, he'd learn how to. Maybe Duo would help him through it.... Maybe they could find a way to be together.... Heero could only hope that it would happen somehow. Somehow. Before Heero did fall asleep, his last thoughts were concentrating on how he and Duo could be together.
Early the next morning approx. 6 a.m.
The loud alarm clock sounded through the bedroom. Duo woke up and groaned. He rolled over to see Heero looking back at him. Duo jumped. "Holy jeez Heero! You scared me!"
"Your alarm clock woke me up." Heero replied.
"Well that isn't my fault man. I have to get to work ya know. Now let go of me so I can get up to shower." Duo said. Heero shook his head. "Heero, I said let go of me. Now listen!" again, Heero shook his head. "Why?"
"Because I don't want to let you go..."Heero admitted.
"Oh Heero, if you really want to stay, why can't we just be together. Then you could have this everyday..."
"I told you already, I can't deal with that kind of emotional stress. Duo, it was almost too much last night. I could barely take that and now I don't want this to end." Heero told him in full truth. He looked at the sad eyed Duo, who looked away.
"Heero, I thought last night was the beginning of something. Having someone won't be bad. I can help you sort through your emotions..."
"Duo, I told you last night. No. I can't. Duo, just wait until I'm ready. Please..."
"You didn't seem too unready last night Heero. Now I can't understand this but I'll just have to let you decide right? Now let go of me now." Duo said forcefully. He wasn't expecting Heero to actually listen but surprisingly, he did. "I have to go have a shower."
Duo left the room. Heero sighed. Why did his emotions have to hold up a barrier to everyone who offered him any affection? Now he didn't care anymore. He was going to be with Duo no matter what!

//Stay with me tonight this only night
But don't forget to know//

There it's done! At last! I can have some peace! That is until I start the next chapter. Oh well. Peace for a while is good!