Why?

the song Kryptonite (by 3DoorsDown) isn't mine and neither are the fore mentioned Gundam characters or the part based on the Gundam Wing episode "Party Night") Or the Gundam Wing TV show itself.



/I took a walk around the world to ease my troubled mind/

As the Gundam's beam sword sliced two more mobile suits in half it's pilot stared warily, not at the attacking enemy, but at the beautiful landscape below. For hundreds of miles in front lay the ocean, a sparkling deep blue abyss from which life first appeared. And now ironically, it was the ocean that claimed the bodies of the pilot's enemies and pulled them to their watery grave.
"The ocean should be filled with the blood of all who have suffered at my will," he thought ruefully as he impaled another mobile suit, watching it hit the water and sink beyond view. And still, to his amusement, the water stayed a sparkling placid blue.

/I left my body lying somewhere in the sands of time/

Sitting in his Gundam after the battle, the pilot looked once again to the ocean below him, and then to the pristine rooftops of the newly constructed Sanc Kingdom. The Sanc Kingdom, his new home. Home, a word almost foreign to him. He had never had a true home and now, here he was living in the castle in the center of the kingdom. Living there with her. But no, he couldn't think of her now, she only confused him. Confusion, and all other emotions for that matter, were new to the Perfect Soldier. At least they had been, before he met her. He looked at the Sanc Kingdom and told himself that this time, he wouldn't go back.

/I watch the world float to the dark side of the moon I fear there's nothing I can do/

He got out of the Gundam and dropped to the ground, knowing she'd be there waiting for him. She immediately ran to him and threw her arms around him.
"I knew you'd come back," she whispered in his ear before pulling away and grinning at him. He stared at her.
"Why?" he thought, "Why did I come back? Is it because of her?" He had no more time to contemplate this because she pulled him to the car and they returned to the castle. Later that night he crept into her room and stood watching her sleep while thinking.

/I watch the world float to the dark side of the moon. After all I knew it had to be something to do with you/

"What is it about her that makes me feel this way? Ever since the war began I've been somehow connected to her. All of the battles I have fought have centered around her. Every road I have taken has led me back to her. But why do I keep returning? Do I want to be here, with her?" He stared at the sleeping figure in the immense bed and listened to her steady breathing.
"Why can't I kill her? I've tried so many times and never gone through with it. I could kill her now… no that would be cowardice. But why kill her anyway? The war is practically over, she no longer poses a threat to me or my missions anymore. So why do I still feel the need to be rid of her?" But deep down he knew she truly was a threat to him. She caused him to have emotions; emotions the Perfect Soldier could not afford to have.


/I really don't mind what happens now and then, as long as you'll be my friend at the end/

He sat across from her at dinner every night so he could study her face and try to decipher her thoughts. Then afterwards they would retire to the library where they played chess, or she read, but they never talked. They never had a decent conversation, and neither expected to. He was so quiet most of the time she had gotten used to the silence. Besides, she was content just having him there, she didn't need words. So there they sat, she reading and he staring at her while the firelight danced across her face, illuminating her green eyes and turning her hair the colors of honey and gold. He spoke suddenly and surprised her.
"Why?"
"What?" she looked up at him, bewildered. He sat forward in his chair and stared at her, his prussian blue eyes drilling into hers.
"Why do you tolerate me? Why do you follow me around? Why do you want to be with me? Why aren't you ashamed to be near me after all of the lives I have taken and bloodshed I have caused? Why?"
Tears began to fall from her eyes and she smiled at him sadly before answering "Hora Kiminiko Isheteru?"

/If I go crazy then will you still call me Superman/

"I am the Perfect Soldier"

/If I'm alive and well will you be there holding my hand/

"Trained form birth to kill"

/I'll keep you by my side with my Super human might. Kryptonite/

"I will not be defeated by these emotions"

/You call me strong you call me weak but still your secrets I will keep. You took for granite all the times I never let you down/

They sat on a low wall staring out at the ocean and setting sun. She turned to him and smiled, sliding off the wall and walking down the beach to the edge of the water. He followed her curiously and when he was standing next to her she took off her shoes and stepped a few feet into the water. He stared at her as the sea breeze blew her hair around her and caused her long skirts to skim the water. She gestured for him to follow her and he hesitantly took off his shoes then walked slowly into the water. She laughed and pulled him farther into the ocean until they were waist deep in the cool salty water. He looked at her confused.
"Why are we standing in the ocean?"
She grinned. "Because it's fun" Before he could answer she shoved him under the water. He came up sputtering and glaring at her. She rolled her eyes and splashed him and then he splashed her back. As they stood there splashing and dunking each other in the waning daylight, he smiled. For the first time in years he was happy.

/You stumbled in and bumped your head if not for me then you'd be dead I picked you up and put you back on solid ground/

Flashback: He typed at his laptop and occasionally glanced out of the window at the numerous couples below, running to the banquet hall for the party.
"I am not involved," he turned back to his laptop and continued typing. His dormitory door opened and she walked in. He got up and took out his gun, pointing at her. She seemed unfazed.
"Going on another mission?" she took a step forward. He stared at her, dismayed.
"Who told you?" he leveled the gun and cocked it.
"Dr. J."
"What?" the gun dropped to his side while he glared at her in surprise.
"Dr. J. told me, now come with me to the party. It is your last night here."
They danced gracefully across the floor.
"I didn't want to die without answers, still going to kill me?" she smiled at him as they glided across the dance floor.
"Yes" their waltz continued until the sounds of gunshots and explosions sounded from outside.
"Enemies!" he pushed away form her and left the hall, running for his Gundam. She followed after him. Once safely in his Gundam he preceded to shoot down the attacking mobile suits, until he heard her voice from behind. He turned and saw her below him, tiny compared to the massive machine. She called to him repeatedly but he didn't respond. Without warning the building behind her exploded, sending showers of metal pummeling towards her. He didn't stop to think, he just thrust the hand of the Gundam over her to shield her from the falling debris. Afterwards she looked up.
"Hey! Why haven't you killed me? You said you were gonna!"
"Why haven't I finished her?" he thought. "I'd be better off if she died." A mobile suit appeared out of nowhere and began shooting at the Gundam's back.
"Why can't I kill her?!" he yelled angrily as he swung the Gundam around and impaled the mobile suit, which promptly exploded. He turned back to her and they faced each other in stillness. The pilot in the Gundam looking down at the girl, the girl looking up at the Gundam. He slowly began to back the machine up then, putting it into its flight mode, he flew off into the darkness. She watched the Gundam disappear.
"Don't run from me." She whispered into the night.

/If I go crazy then will you still call me Superman/

He couldn't take it anymore. These emotions, they were getting the best of him. He had to do something about it. He had to do the only thing he knew how, destroy his problem because there is no room in the Perfect Soldier for emotion.

/If I'm alive and well will you be there holding my hand/

Wasn't that what he was trained to do? Maim, kill, and destroy. But he had to destroy the cause of his problem, her, she caused all of these emotions. Yes, he would finally kill her, it was his only option.

/I'll keep you by my side with my super human might/

She was in the library after dinner when he approached her.
"Gomen Asai," he said, and then kissed her.
"What?" she pulled away in surprise and confusion.
"Ome O Karosu," he pulled out his gun, leveled it with her chest, cocked it and pulled the trigger. Everything after that seemed to happen in slow motion. He saw in detail the look of utter horror on her face as she fell to the floor. Saw the blood fly through the air and land on his shirt. Saw more blood pool around her body. She lay on the floor clutching her wound. She looked to him sadly.
"Why?" she whispered before her eyes drew close and her body went limp. She was dead. He stared at the blood on his shirt, then at the cold dead body on the floor. It was just a body. Just another of his unfortunate victims. But no, it wasn't just a body, it was she. He had just killed the only person he'd ever loved.
"What have I done?" he repeated to himself, staring down at her body in terror. Then he was silent as understanding filled his face, as well as his heart. He slowly put the gun to his head. He then uttered his final words before pulling the trigger and taking his own life.
"I love you… Relena"
/Kryptonite/

Japanese translations:
Hora Kiminiko Isheteru- Don't you see I'm in love with you?
Gomen Asai- Please forgive me
Ome O Karosu- I'm going to kill you