Title: Remember, My Love

Author: Angelchica

Email: Mistyblue622@hotmail.com

Summary: Cordelia loses her memory and is in the hands of Wolfram & Hart who brainwash her into thinking that Angel is evil. C/A pairing all the way! Why would I do anything else?

Spoiler: Does there have to be one? Ok well um...if you didn't know that Angel has a son named Connor then don't read this but then again if you read this spoiler then you should know that he has a son so now you can read the story!

Disclaimer: Yes I own them all! I created them! That's why I invented the TV show and am now making millions because of them! j/k!

Feedback: As always please R & R! Your reviews and the fact that you read my stories is what keeps me writing! Send me ideas that you would want me to write about. I would be happy to write stories on ideas that you give me. Just let me know! (mistyblue622@hotmail.com)

I also want to say thanks to Kat! Thank you for the idea and I don't know about you but I think that this story came out pretty good didn't it? Hope you like it and thanks again for the idea! You're da bomb! hehe!


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Chances

"She doesn't remember anything. I tried to get her back to us but she wouldn't hear any of it. Lilah's got her brainwashed into thinking that I'm evil. Of course she didn't hesitate to tell her that I'm a vampire but I'm betting she didn't tell her that I have a soul," Angel said.

"She's usin' you against her. Did you honestly think that Lilah would tell Cordelia the truth? She's got her in her hands. This turned out better than she thought. She's usin' Cordelia as the weapon an' as long as she's got her, there's nothin' you can do 'bout it," Fred said.

"Well, she has to remember. People eventually get their memories back," Angel said.

"Not all. You just have to hope that something sparks interest in her but for the time being there's no way you're going to get to see her. She's seen you once and that's enough for her," Wesley said.

"Well I have one hope left," Angel said.

"What's that?" Gunn asked.

"I slipped one of our business cards into her purse without her knowing. Once she sees it she'll see her name in it and maybe it will get her thinking. Plus I told her that-"

Angel stopped himself. He didn't know if he should tell them that he had told Cordelia that he loved her. They might not react to it the way he would want them to.

"Told her what?" Wesley asked.

"I-I told her that, well, I told her that I would never hurt her," Angel said quickly.

"Oh and that's really going to change her mind about you," Gunn said sarcastically. Angel looked down. Everything seemed as if it was in Lilah and Wolfram & Hart's favor. He looked back up.

"I'm not going to give up. Somehow I'll figure out a way to get her back," Angel said as he went downstairs. Fred looked at him and followed him. Angel knew she was following.

"You told her didn't you," Fred said to him. Angel turned around. Somehow Fred always knew everyone better than they thought. She just had a way of telling things right even though she seemed so naive but yet she had some kind of intuition towards things.

"It's too late though. She doesn't care now. Lilah has her against me. How am I going to get her back? It won't be love. She hates me," Angel said.

"You never know. I mean maybe it'll spark somethin'. It did in me," Fred said softly. Angel looked at her. He remembered how at first she had been so in love with him but now she seemed over it.

"Maybe," Angel said.

"I know Cordelia. She is a very smart person. She will figure things out. It might take her a while but she will find her way home. All you need to do is be patient," Fred said.

"But that's exactly what I don't have. Patience. I don't want to be patient. Every day that passes without her gets worse. Who knows what they are filling her head with. Who knows that if she gets her memory back. What will they do then? Kill her? I can't risk that," Angel said.

* * *

Cordelia walked into her room. She grabbed her purse and went through it trying to find some money. She had planned on spending the day at the mall. She got out her wallet and noticed that a small card fell on the floor. She bent down to pick it up and turned it over. She read the business card and then glanced up. She sat on the edge of the bed and just stared at the card in disbelief. She couldn't believe what she was reading. At the top of the business card was Angel Investigations printed in a dark shade of black. The name under that title was what shocked her even more.

"Cordelia Chase," she said to herself. This didn't make sense. How could her name be written on this? How could she have been somehow related with Angel. Lilah had told her that he was evil and that he had caused her so much pain. This didn't make sense. Cordelia got up and wrote the phone number on a separate piece of paper. She folded the paper and put it in the back pocket of her jeans. She looked once more at the business card. Cordelia looked up to see Lilah. She saw Lilah looking at her, holding the card. Lilah neared her and eyed the card.

Lilah turned cold. How had she gotten a hold of it?

"Cordelia, how did you get that?" Lilah asked.

"That's not important. You've been keeping things and lying to me and I know about it," Cordelia said.

"You do?" Lilah asked.

"Why didn't you tell me? Why didn't you tell me that I worked for Angel?" Cordelia said.

Lilah looked at her. At least now she was sure she hadn't gotten back her memory completely.

"I didn't want to alarm you," Lilah said.

"I was a part of the bad side wasn't I! You should have told me. You said I had nothing to do with Angel but it was a lie. I was a part of his side!" Cordelia yelled.

Lilah looked at Cordelia in disbelief. Cordelia actually really believes Angel is evil and that she had something to do with that.

"I'm sorry it's just that I wanted to save you from a bad moment and memory. That happened a long time ago. Angel had a spell cast on you which somehow made you lose your soul. He made you a part of his team but I eventually reversed the spell and you had no recollection of it," Lilah said.

"But why would he put my name on this card?" Cordelia asked.

"You were on his side for a good long while. It took a long time before we got that spell reversed," Lilah said looking at Cordelia hoping that she had convinced her. "But still, how did you get this card? You saw him didn't you? You saw him and you didn't tell me!"

"I'm sorry. But don't worry. I put him in his place and I threw some holy water at him and took advantage of that moment to run away," Cordelia said.

"Don't worry about. Now give me that card. Nothing good can come out of it," Lilah said as Cordelia handed her the business card.

"Well, I thought I would go to the mall and see what I could find," Cordelia said as she grabbed her purse and started to fix it since she had made a mess in it.

"That's fine. I have to go in to the office for some last minute work. I'll be back later," Lilah said as she left the apartment. Cordelia got up and started to walk out of the room but then started to feel dizzy. She held on to the dresser.

She started to see a vision one like before only without the pain. She saw herself fighting against many different things. Vampires, demons, you name them. She saw herself pregnant. Then she saw herself lying in a hospital totally unaware about what was going on. She saw herself dressed as some kind of queen being bowed down at. Then she saw herself having a vision. Then a guy kissed her and turned into a demon and jumped to his death. The last one was what got her. She was fighting against some vampire. The vampire punched her and made her fall to the ground. The vampire was about to bite her but then it turned to dust. Cordelia looked up and saw Angel, extending his hand to help her up which she took. Then the vision went away. Cordelia opened her eyes and noticed that she was in the room. Her purse had fallen to the ground.

Cordelia went over to the bed and sat down. She knew what she had seen but she didn't understand it. Everything she had seen was so overwhelming but then again everything she had learned about herself didn't make much sense either. She had seen too much and she wasn't sure if she wanted to see the rest. But the last part was what got her the most. Lilah had told her that Angel had hurt her. The last part of her vision showed Angel saving her. Why would he save her? Cordelia knew there was only one way to find out. She wished that there could have been another way but the more she thought about it, the more she knew it was the right thing to do.

Cordelia walked over to the phone. She got out her piece of paper and unfolded it and dialed the number. She waited for the phone to ring a couple of times before someone finally answered it.

"Hello?"

"Hi," Cordelia said softly.

"Angel Investigations," the voice said.

"Is Angel there?" Cordelia asked.

"Yeah this is...Cordelia?" Angel asked.

"Yeah it's me," she said.

"What's wrong? Are you ok?" he asked.

"I'm fine. It's just that...Well I was wondering if we could meet. I have a lot of questions to ask you," Cordelia said. Angel was shocked but he wasn't letting this opportunity get away from him.

"Sure, no problem," Angel said.

"Where can we meet? It has to be somewhere public," Cordelia said.

"Why?" Angel asked.

"Look, just because I want to find out some things doesn't mean that you and me are good. I still don't know what's going on and all I want is to get to the truth. Don't think I'm going to fall for everything you say. I don't trust you or anyone," Cordelia said.

"Look, I understand. Where do you want to meet?" Angel asked.

"I saw this cafe at the corner of 5th and State. Do you know where that's at? Cordelia asked.

"Yeah, what time?"

"Is 8 alright?" Cordelia asked.

"Sure, I'll be there," Angel said.

"See you then," Cordelia said as she hung up the phone. She didn't know if she had done the right thing but she was desperate to know the truth. She couldn't keep on living a lie or living a life full of mystery and chaos. She had to recover her memory and she had an intuition that what she was doing was right.

* * *

Cordelia arrived at the cafe early. She wanted to make sure that she wasn't being followed or anything to that extent, but as she neared the cafe, she noticed that Angel was already sitting down at a table. Angel saw her and got up to greet her. Cordelia walked towards him.

"You're here early," Cordelia said.

"So are you," Angel said. Cordelia looked at him and then sat down. A waiter came by and Cordelia ordered a coffee as did Angel.

"Well, I'm just going to get right to the point. I want to hear your part of the story," Cordelia said.

"My part?" Angel asked.

"Yeah, I want to know everything. Lilah told me "the story" but there are some parts of it that I am having trouble believing and hopefully you can sort of set things straight," Cordelia said.

"I'll tell you whatever you want to know but first I need to give you something," Angel said as he handed Cordelia a key.

"What's this for?"

"It's for your apartment. In case you ever just want to get away from everything. Lilah doesn't know this place. I just thought you might want it," Angel said.

"Thanks," Cordelia said as she put the key in her purse and took the paper where Angel wrote down the address to her apartment.

"So, what do you want to know?" Angel asked.

"Angel Investigations," Cordelia said.

"What about it?" Angel asked.

"Look, I know you put that business card in my purse purposely. My name is printed on that card," Cordelia said.

"Well, yeah, I mean it was your idea to do it in the first place. Then again, business is your specialty," Angel said.

"I worked for you?" Cordelia asked.

"Well, yeah. You were sort of like the secretary. You took down the messages and you help research topics. Lately you've been taking part in fighting against the demons. You've been getting stronger due to all our training together," Angel said.

"Oh, so that means I can defend myself. Well that's a good thing. Alright, so far so good but I'm thinking this is where things are going to get really messed up. Lilah, told me that you are a vampire and well obviously I can see that. She said you are evil and that you hurt me but so far you have made no attempt to do so," Cordelia said.

"Yeah well at least Lilah didn't completely lie to you. I am a vampire and I was evil. I did hurt you sometimes because of my stupidity and selfishness but not in the way that you are thinking. Many years ago, gypsies cursed me with a soul. This gives me a conscious. I can't hurt, kill, or harm any innocent people. I can't bring about myself to kill them in order for me to live," Angel said.

"But don't vampires need blood to live?" Cordelia asked.

"Well, I make trips to the butcher and well you can see where I'm going from there," Angel said.

"What about the visions? How did I get them?" Cordelia asked.

"Well, when we first started working together there was this guy Doyle who was in love with you but you never gave him a chance. Later on you found out that he was actually half-demon-"

"and then he kissed me and jumped to his death," Cordelia finished it off for Angel.

"You remembered?"

"Yeah earlier today I had like a whole bunch of pieces put all together," Cordelia said.

"Did you remember anything else?" Angel asked.

"Yeah, a baby," Cordelia said.

"Oh, Connor. Yeah we really love him," Angel said.

"We? You mean he's our son?" Cordelia asked.

"No! No, he's not. He's my son," Angel said.

"Oh, who's the mother?" Cordelia asked.

"Darla but she died a while ago," Angel said as he got a little sad. Cordelia noticed this.

"I'm sorry," Cordelia said.

"No, don't be. I mean maybe things were better off that way. There was no telling what she would have been like after she had given birth. I mean once she gave birth, she would be back to her normal self," Angel said.

"Was she a vampire too?" Cordelia asked. Angel nodded. Cordelia looked into his eyes. Everything he was telling her made sense. She could hear his sincerity in his voice but then again he could just be a very good actor but something about him made her believe in him. She was scared to tell him this. She didn't want to end up trusting him and then being let down.

"Earlier you said that you had hurt me. Is this what you did to me?" Cordelia asked as she moved her head to the right to expose the scar left on her neck. Angel immediately remembered.

"Darla did that to you. She was pregnant at the time but you still tried to make her feel as welcome as possible even though she was still a very dangerous vampire. Even more dangerous. I was so scared that day. When I busted into that room and saw her biting you I panicked. I ran over there and pulled her away from you. I was so scared that I would lose you," Angel said to her.

Cordelia looked into his eyes. There was so much love in his eyes and so much sincerity in his voice. That last line got to her. She felt all warm inside and so calm. She felt safe with him. As if nothing bad would happen to her but still, she couldn't give in just yet. Cordelia got up and walked away from the table. Angel looked up at her and got up. He started to follow her but then realized he forgot to pay so he just left a twenty on the table and ran to catch up to Cordelia.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that," Angel said. Cordelia looked at him. She knew she had to ask him one more question.

"The other day when I saw you and threw the holy water at you, you said something," Cordelia said. Angel knew what she was talking about. Angel just looked at her waiting for her to continue.

"Why did you say it? Why did you say that you love me?" Cordelia asked. Angel was about to answer the question but then neared her instead. He lowered his head and Cordelia looked into his eyes. They started to get closer. Cordelia's heart was racing. She knew what was about to happen but she didn't want to pull away. Something about him just made her know that it was ok. That she should give in to this feeling growing inside of her but then again this seemed familiar. It felt as if she had already loved this man or vampire, whatever it was that you wanted to call it.

The two of them got closer and closer. Just when their lips were about to touch, Angel could sense an uneasiness. He opened his eyes and saw Cordelia grab her head and then fall. Angel caught her in mid air and waited for the vision to seize. He looked at his Seer. He could tell that the visions were getting out of control. They were nothing like they were in the beginning. They were taking a toll. He saw how it left Cordelia and it hurt him inside. Finally, the vision seemed to cease. Cordelia opened her eyes only to be met by Angel's.

"Are you ok?" Angel asked as Cordelia got up and pulled herself away from Angel.

"I'm fine," she lied. Angel knew she wasn't but he didn't think that arguing would be the best thing to do right now.

"What did you see?" Angel asked.

"A pack of vampires. Not too far from here. They were attacking a couple of people. They were so scared," Cordelia said.

"Did you get a street or anything?" Angel asked.

"I didn't get the street but it looked familiar. I passed it on my way over here," Cordelia said.

"I need to know so that I can go stop them," Angel said.

"No! I'm going!" Cordelia yelled.

"Cordelia, you are going to wait right here. Don't move until I come back," Angel said.

"Come back from where? From going to fight some vampires that you don't even know where they're at?" Cordelia argued back. All of this seemed familiar. The arguing about her going to fight the vampires or demons. Cordelia started to walk. Angel shook his head and followed. They walked for a couple of minutes when Cordelia stopped.

"This is what I saw in my vision. It was in some kind of alley," Cordelia said as they heard a garbage can fall and then a person's scream. They started to run towards the scream. They ran into an alley and sure enough there were the vampires. Cordelia turned to face Angel. She looked at his face. Cordelia stood motionless. She wasn't ready to see him turn into all bumpy looking guy. Angel ran into the alley and started to fight the vampires. Cordelia remembered the stake that Lilah had given her and took it out of her purse.

Angel was fighting against a group of vampires. He punched one in the face and then spun around and kicked another in the chest. Cordelia ran in. She was scared. How could this be a normal part in her life. Fighting demons and vampires on a normal basis didn't sound that safe. She ran in and noticed that one of the vampires was heading towards her. Cordelia started to panic. What was she supposed to do. The vampire was getting closer. Cordelia closed her eyes and threw her fist at the vampire. Cordelia winced in the pain that the punched caused her. She opened her eyes and noticed that the vampire was stumbling back holding on to his jaw. The vampire regained his senses and charged after her. Cordelia held the stake in her hand but it didn't really help since she didn't know where the heart was exactly. She screamed as the vampire grabbed her and fell down with her.

Cordelia opened up her eyes and saw that the vampire was on top of her. She looked down and noticed that the stake was impaled into the vampire.

"Close, but not close enough," the vampire said just as Angel pulled the vampire off of Cordelia and threw him across the room. Cordelia hung on to the stake. Angel looked down and extended his hand to Cordelia. She was about to take it when she saw that a vampire was heading towards Angel, ready to stake him. Cordelia took his hand and pulled him down while at the same time pulling herself up. She took the stake and plunged it into the vampire who stopped right in front of her, noticed that the stake had made its mark, and then turned into dust. Cordelia was overwhelmed by the experience.

Angel got up and walked towards Cordelia.

"I Guess I was more than just close that time," Cordelia said as she turned around to face Angel.

"You saved my life," Angel said. Cordelia looked down. Why had she done that? She didn't have a reason to. Lilah had told her if she could, to kill him. That he was better off dead.

"Oh sorry, I didn't mean to," Cordelia said as she started to walk away. Angel caught up to her and stood up in front of her.

"Are you really?" Angel asked.

"Am I really what?" Cordelia asked.

"Sorry," Angel replied. Cordelia looked up at him. She didn't know what she was doing anymore. How could something so wrong feel so right? Cordelia avoided the question.

"I have to go. Don't follow me or anything otherwise the next time, I won't save you and I won't be sorry about that," Cordelia said as she walked off.

"The next time," Angel repeated to himself with a smile. Angel was happy. He knew he had earned himself some trust in her and he knew that little by little, he would win her back. Angel headed back to the cafe where he had left his car and decided to head back to the Hyperion to tell everyone the good news.

* * *

Lilah peered into the window of her car.

"I told you. I told you that in only a matter she would go to him," Gavin said to Lilah as they watched Angel climb into his car.

"Well, at least I still have her in my hands. She doesn't remember completely. But I think it's time we go back to Plan A," Lilah said.

"Plan A?" Gavin questioned her.

"Kill her," Lilah said with a smile.