Chapter 41



"So," Kay teased. "What do you think?" "About what?" Gwen huffed. Rubbing her sore feet. "Ouch! I think my toes are broken." Kay cackled deviously. "You know." "No, I don't know," Gwen grumbled. But Kay didn't miss the tiny smile. The twinkle in her eye. "Yes, you do. Tell me. Have I succeeded? Have I cured you from your bout of temporary insanity? Come on," Kay whined. "He's.he's an uncoordinated goof. But.he's kinda cute," she admitted grudgingly. Kay flashed her a mega-watt smile. "Cute," Hank whispered to himself. "Brad Pitt cute? Ben Affleck cute? Say it. You think I'm drop-dead gorgeous." Gwen rolled her eyes. "Puppy dog cute," she smirked. Hank's mouth hung open. "Puppy.puppy dog cute? You think I look like Lassie?" Gwen hobbled over to the refreshment table. "No," she grinned. "What's the name of that dog in that movie with Tom Hanks? Him. You definitely look like him." Kay smiled. Way to burst Uncle Hank's bubble, Gwen.

She poured herself a glass of punch and scanned the dance floor. Jessica and Reese were still at it. Good. Little sisters were good for something, after all. She didn't want Reese stuck to her like flypaper. "Oh! Kay! Why aren't you out there dancing?" Kay bit her lip to stop from shouting what she really wanted to say. 'Because you've suddenly become Miguel's Siamese twin!' "Um.Reese is a little bit busy right now," she said sadly. Staring at her feet. She heard Charity whisper something to Miguel. And she had to bite her lip to contain her grin when she felt Miguel's hand on her shoulder. "Kay? Kay, would you like to dance?" Yes! Yes! I'd like to dance! "You don't have to dance with me because you feel sorry for me, Miguel. I'm okay. Really." "Kay Bennett.I didn't ask you because I felt sorry for you. I asked you because I want to." Her dark eyes sparkled at him. And if Miguel hadn't inherited ALL the stupid genes Theresa didn't have, he would have seen once and for all that his best buddy loved him. It was like a flashing neon sign. Kay took Miguel's hand with a sigh. Oh well.nobody ever said she loved Miguel for his I.Q.

"Dance with me." Whitney's head snapped around, she found herself staring into the blue eyes of none other than Chris Hall. "Excuse me?" "I said dance with me," he repeated. Pulling her free from Chad's arms. Whitney jerked her arm free and glared at him. "No thank you," she spat. "I already have a wonderful partner," she said. Smiling rather shyly at Chad. "You heard the lady," Chad smirked. Pushing Chris backwards. "She don't want to dance." Whitney sighed in relief when Chad led her away. To a quiet corner. "Thank you." "You're welcome," Chad grinned. "Hey.would you like something to drink? I'll be right back." Whitney's eyes were glued on his every move as he walked away, and she sighed happily and closed her eyes. Maybe.

"OH WHIT! IT'S SO WONDERFUL! ETHAN IS SUCH A GOOD DANCER! I CAN'T WAIT TO DANCE WITH HIM AT OUR WEDDING!" Whitney's eyes popped open, and she groaned in frustration. The whole school didn't just hear that. Did they? "Theresa.Honey.do you have to be so." "So what, Whit? In love? Lucky? Gorgeous?" she giggled. Whitney bit her lip to the point of pain. Gorgeous? Ha! Her best friend kind of reminded of a toy soldier at this moment. She remembered the glee in Kay's eyes at the game earlier when half of Harmony had been scared out of their wits. She was sure."WHITNEY! YOU'RE NOT LISTENING TO ME!"

"Look.Ethan.just a word of advice," Luis said. "A word of what?" Ethan grinned stupidly. Luis shook his head. Maybe Theresa wasn't so far off the mark. Maybe the terrible F-word was working its magic. "Luis," Sheridan rolled her eyes. "Don't even think that." "W-W-hat?" "Nevermind," she smiled. Blue eyes twinkling in amusement. "Leave him alone," she whispered in his ear. "Roger decided he liked Theresa more." "Roger? Who's Roger?" "Ethan's brain cell," Sheridan said blithely. Giggling when Luis gave her a 'what the hell?' look. "You heard me right. Ethan's brain cell is now taking up residence in your sister's fantasy-filled head. Do you think I should tell Gwen?" Luis started choking on his own laughter. And Ethan's absentminded "Are you okay?" didn't help much. Especially when he walked across the dance floor like a horror-flick zombie. With a silly grin on his face. "Do you think we should tell Gwen?" Sheridan laughed as they watched Ethan lift the black veil from Theresa's painted face. "I DO! I DO!" Theresa squealed. Jumping up and down. "I don't think we have to. He didn't scream. It MUST be love."



Chapter 42



"EWW! This punch tastes funny!" Chris was dying laughing on the inside. Yeah.it DID taste funny. In a good way, he thought as he downed another glass. Mmm, mmm. Good. Ms. Crane didn't seem to think the punch tasted funny. She'd had.oh, he'd lost count of how many glasses she'd had. She and Miggie's copper brother were putting on quite a show. Damn, she was all over the guy. Maybe he should cut in. Nah. He could barely slow dance. There was no way in hell he could tango. Not like that. He'd have better luck with The Ice Queen. Miss Whitney Russell.

"LUIS," Sheridan shouted over the music. Very loudly. "I LOVE DANCING WITH YOU. IT'S SO MUCH FUN!" Luis gave her another one of his breathtaking grins. And Sheridan couldn't help it. "YOU'RE TOO DAMN SEXY FOR YOUR OWN GOOD, OFFICER!" Kay burst into hysterical laughter in Miguel's arms. "Oh god," she groaned. "Theresa's rubbing off on her. You know. Kind of like poison oak." Miguel laughed with her. Charity smiled tightly at them both from the sidelines.

"Jessica? Have you seen My Sunshine?" Jessica rolled her eyes behind Reese's back. His Sunshine? Boy did her sister have Reese fooled! "Uh.uh." "I SEE HER!" he grinned. Jessica tripped over her skirt as he pulled her back out onto the dance floor. She blushed a deep crimson color when he started flailing his arms around and shaking his derriere to the music. "Reese!" He looked like he needed a lifeguard, she thought with a laugh. He was drowning.

"Luis," Sheridan growled. Wrapping her arms around him and pressing herself against him more fully. "DANCE FOR ME, BABY!" Luis's brown eyes about popped out of their sockets at her next move. She didn't. She did! "Sheridan," he stammered. "Did you just." "Squeeze your ass-ets?" she teased. Golden brow arched at him playfully. Luis stopped her roving hands as they traveled down his chest. Loosening buttons on the way. "In front of the whole." She cut him off with the kiss to end all kisses. "School," he gasped. "What's got into you tonight?" "Hmm. You like?" Sheridan purred.

Whitney laughed. Embarrassed for her. "Man," Chad chuckled. "Hey Ms. Crane! This dance is strictly PG-13!" Chad pretended to be hurt when Whitney slapped his chest in embarrassment. "OW! What was that for? She's going to want to hide beneath the nearest rock tomorrow, and you know it." "CHAD! There you are! I've been looking for you everywhere," Simone gushed. "Thanks for keeping him company, Whitney." Whitney stood shell-shocked in the middle of the dance floor as Simone whisked Chad away.

"WHIT! LOOK! I GAVE MY TIARA TO ETHAN! DOESN'T HE LOOK FANTASTIC?" Whitney choked in surprise. Okay.this was going too far. But.Ethan grinned stupidly. She shook her head. The idiot was making NO move to take the crown off. Suddenly she was very worried. First the make-up, the heels, the dress. Now this. "Theresa.Honey. I'm sure Ethan doesn't like wearing your crown. He must feel so silly. Don't you, Ethan?" Ethan's blue eyes sparkled at her. "Actually.no." People on the dance floor stopped to watch Morticia and RuPaul's white twin stumble over each other's feet.

"Oh god," Gwen groaned. "I think I'm going to be sick," she said with a hand over her mouth. "How embarrassing," Hank laughed. "Your girlfriend.oops! Did I say that?" "Shut up!" Hank straddled the chair in front of Gwen and smiled at her. "Hey," he said softly. "I think it's better you found out sooner rather than later. Least you two aren't married," he said gleefully. "Thank God for that," Gwen whispered to herself. The.um, dressing up was more than a little disturbing.

"May I cut in?" Can't he hear me screaming 'NO' on the inside? Apparently not, Kay realized as Reese puckered up for a kiss when Miguel let her go from his arms. "Sugar Plum.I missed you so much." AHHH!!! SOMEBODY HELP ME!!! Watching Miguel make a fool of himself in front of Charity was even worse. Why didn't he look at her like that? Reese twirled her again. And Kay felt like a basketball spinning on someone's finger. "Reese! Stop it!"

"Sheridan.Sheridan." Sheridan giggled as Luis tried to peel her off him. "Sheridan," he said firmly. Horrified as he watched tears spring to her blue eyes and her lips pout at him. Damn. She sure did fight dirty. Without even realizing it, he thought with a helpless smile. "Stop that," he shushed. "You know I hate to see those pretty eyes so sad. Come here," he beckoned. She fit in his arms so perfectly. What the hell. So what if he didn't know which way was up with her tonight? She looped her arms around his neck and hugged him close. Whispered words that made his heart want to burst out of his chest. "I think I love you, Luis." And passed out cold.



Chapter 43



Kay snickered as she flicked the tiny droplets of water at Sheridan. "Wake up," she chanted. "Wake up." Sheridan groaned and threw her arm over her face. Kay sighed heavily. Okay.tiny droplets weren't working. Her dark eyes lit up. Oh sweet inspiration! "Oh god," Gwen muttered under her breath. "What bright idea have you come up with this time?" Kay ignored her. Ambling off to the bathroom. Gwen heard the sound of running water and couldn't help but smile. The old hand in warm water trick. "Kay Bennett.you ARE evil. Sheridan is DEFINITELY going to kill you." "Sheridan," she whispered. "Sheridan." "Go away," Sheridan grumbled. Burying her messy blond head under her down pillow. "Fat chance of that happening," Kay said. Sheridan slapped at Kay's hand when she picked up it slyly. "Oh no you don't! I can fail you for that!"

"You wouldn't," Kay challenged. Sitting on her hands. A grin a mile wide on her face. "Now will you wake up?" "She's not going to stop, Sher. Might as well do it," Gwen laughed. "Very persistent gal. Runs in the family." Sheridan threw the thick comforter to the side with a few very unladylike curses. Directed at.who else? "Ms. Crane," Kay said with wide eyes. "I'm going to tell my mommy on you. You said a dirty, dirty, nasty word." Sheridan staggered to the bathroom clutching her head in agony. "Be nice," Gwen warned. "She doesn't do hangovers well." "Gwen," Sheridan wailed. "I'm already on it. One steaming hot mug of black coffee coming right up."

Blood-shot blue eyes stared at her from the mirror. "How did THIS happen?" Kay's amused voice made her jump. "You mean you don't know? Ms. Crane," she teased. "You were really chugging that punch down." Her toothbrush paused in its motions. "Don't tell me. Somebody spiked it." "Not just somebody. Guess. Harmony High's resident creep in a football uniform." "Chris Hall." "Bingo!" "STOP YELLING!" Kay held up her hands defensively. "Okay. Geez. Aren't you Ms. Suzy Sunshine this morning? Speaking of crazy Suzie's." Sheridan rolled her eyes. "Who? Me?" "Speaking of crazy Suzie's," Kay continued. "You should have seen her. Thank God Principal Reid was too distracted by her attack on his.um, person.EW!.to notice you passed out. Stone-cold drunk," Kay smirked. "Luis had to carry you out of the Youth Center."

Oh my god! Luis! Sheridan's cheeks burned red. She made a fool of herself in front of the straight-laced cop that had stolen her heart. Stolen her heart? "Um.Kay.did I.did I do anything crazy last night? Anything.you know.that I might be embarrassed of in the light of the day?" Kay made a zipping motion with her fingers. "I'm not saying a word. Not a single word." The secretive little she-demon. There was definitely something she wasn't telling her. She winced as the sweatshirt slipped over her head. Damn. Even her hair hurt. Her eyes landed on the pair of gray sweatpants in the far corner of her closet. What the hell. It wasn't like Luis would want to see her anytime soon. Unless he came by to tell her he could never look at her again.

Gwen and Kay sat on the couch. Heads together. Laughing raucously. "And WHAT may I ask is so funny?" She sank into the armchairs deep cushions with a sigh. "Oh Sheridan.too bad you were passed out. You missed quite a party last night." "Spill it." Kay grinned. "Where should I start?" "I don't think I can stomach the thought of Suzie mauling Principal Reid. Go straight to the best parts." "Reese and Chad got into a fistfight with Chris Hall."

Sheridan's jaw dropped open. "What? How? Why?" "Whiney.I mean Whitney refused to dance with him. Over and over again, I might add. Well, Chris wouldn't get the message. He grabbed Whitney and tried to force her out on the dance floor. When Whitney said 'no', Chad landed the first punch." Gwen smiled. "I still don't know how Reese got mixed up in the whole mess." Kay's eyes sparkled. "How else? Chris was so sloshed he couldn't see straight. It was an accident. He broke Reese's glasses. Who knew Reese was so.oh my god! Reese has muscles!"

Sheridan giggled helplessly. "Duh!" She immediately winced. "Well.tell me more. What else happened?" "Ethan did the most wonderful impersonation of Elvis Presley I ever did see," Kay said sarcastically. "And Theresa ate it up," Gwen laughed. "Ms. Crane.someone needs to tell DUMBY. He has absolutely no rhythm. Forrest can't dance." Sheridan's eyes watered over with tears from the laughter. "You're killing me," she gasped. "That's not the half of it," Kay confided. "Theresa was so overcome with emotion, she threw her bra to him. Hiked up her skirt. And." "And what?" "Tripped flat on her clown face. But not without taking out a few.DOZEN.people." Gwen's brown eyes danced. "I'm telling you, Sher. They went down like dominoes." "All in a day's work for the Lethal Weapon," Kay grinned.

Sheridan wiped the tears from her eyes. "I missed a lot." Kay and Gwen looked at each other and burst into laughter. "Boy did you ever," Kay teased. "Kay Bennett.what are you not telling me? I knew it. What happened before I passed out?" "I'll put it this way," Gwen said slowly. "If the dashing Officer Lo-Fitz didn't know you were absolutely gaga over him before.he certainly does now." Sheridan brought her pillow to her face and screamed into it. It was coming back to her in bits and pieces. "Did I really squeeze his butt in public?" "Just like Charmin," Kay cracked. "Okay," she backed down. "Really, really BAD joke. Sorry." "Did I.did I say something stupid?" "I plead The Fifth on the grounds that you might take out your considerable FRUSTRATION on me," Kay said seriously. "Kay," Sheridan warned. "No, M'am."

The doorbell rang, and Kay swore she saw Sheridan's eyes cross. "Answer the damn door," she said between gritted teeth. Gwen got up and hobbled to the door. But not without a very necessary stop to peer out the window. "It's him. It's him." "Oh my god! I can't let him see me like this!" Sheridan shrieked. Jumping up in a blind panic. Unfortunately for her."Ouch!" Kay groaned. Another reason on Ms. Crane's considerable list. "Sorry," she apologized. Scooping the pair of sneakers into her arms and helping Sheridan to her feet. "Luis," she smiled brightly. Hopping on one foot to the couch where she collapsed in an exhausted heap. Luis smiled back just as brightly. "Do they have it bad or what?" Gwen pulled Kay into the kitchen with a finger to her lips. "Too bad she doesn't remember saying it." "I think we can fix that," Kay smirked. Stretching a slender arm out and turning the CD player on the counter on. David Cassidy crooned "I Think I Love You" from its speakers. And on the couch in the living room, Sheridan Crane passed out cold for the second time in 24 hours.



Chapter 44



"Sheridan! Sheridan! Wake up!" Why did she feel like she had done this before? "Luis," she said groggily. "Luis.what happened?" Luis slipped an arm beneath her back and helped her sit up. His brown eyes were twinkling with amusement. He ducked his head, but Sheridan could still see the smile threatening. "You passed out on me. Again," he chuckled. "That makes it twice in 24 hours. I don't know if I should be flattered or embarrassed." "Flattered," Sheridan blurted. Luis grinned at her. "You're blushing," he teased. Caressing her cheek lightly with his knuckles.

In the kitchen, Gwen laughed helplessly while Kay groaned in frustration. "Those two.God! Why is she so damn shy around him? He's only a guy." "Kay," Gwen snorted. "Okay," Kay rolled her eyes. "So he isn't an ordinary guy. At this rate, my grandchildren will have to endure this.this stupidity. That's it! We're going to have to get her drunk again. That's the only way she's going to spit it out." "I don't know about that," Gwen smirked. Kay poked her head back around the kitchen door. Hanging on every word.

"Luis," Sheridan gulped nervously. "Luis.about last night." "Yeah," he encouraged. Taking her hand in his and turning it palm side up. "Luis," she continued. "I may have said some things." Her blue eyes fluttered shut at the gentle touch of his fingertips tracing the lines of her palm. "Yes! Luis!" Gwen cheered as Luis cupped Sheridan's hand to his cheek and kissed it sweetly. "She's going to crack," Kay said gleefully. "Sheridan," Luis prodded. "You were saying." "Would you look at that? He so knows what he's doing." "Who knows what he's doing?" "Holy @#$%! Mrs. Crane! You scared me!"

Ivy's blue green eyes sparkled mischievously. "Ooo. I just love eavesdropping." Kay's brows shot to the top of her head. "Really?" Gwen stumbled into the kitchen counter as Ivy wedged herself in between her and Kay. "Hey! You're hogging up the best spot," Kay glared. Ivy gave the teen her best 'Don't you dare mess with me' stare. Gwen's mouth hung open in shock when Kay didn't back down. "Shh," Gwen raised a finger to her lips. "Stop fighting. I can't tell what's going on."

"You know," Sheridan babbled. "I had too much to drink, and I really don't know what I said. One time when Gwen and I went to a party.I had the bright idea to go skinny-dipping. In front of 50, 60 fully clothed people. It was so embarrassing! Not as embarrassing as this, though," she muttered under her breath. Luis shook with laughter. "Now that I would kill to see." "Meow," Ivy purred. "What I wouldn't give to see the good Officer." "Ivy!" Gwen gasped. Kay snarled her nose. "Don't I see a wedding ring on that finger?" she sassed. "Ugh," she shuddered uncontrollably. "Who wants to see Julian naked? No offense, Ivy." "None taken," Ivy grinned. "It is rather.pathetic's too kind a word."

"Sheridan. Slow down," Luis grinned. "You weren't that bad. In fact.you were the life of the party." "You're just being nice," Sheridan said softly. "No. Really," Luis laughed. "Kay has the pictures to prove it." "K- Kay? That girl," she shook her head. "Uh oh," Kay grumbled. "Bust-ed." "You have pictures?" Ivy perked up. "Yeah.but they're going to cost you. I can sell them to you for.$50." "What the.$50! For pictures?" "They're really good pictures," Gwen smirked. "Luis.I.I have a history of making a fool of myself when I'm with you. I can't even look at you without blushing," she blushed. "I like that about you," Luis laughed. "Uh huh, Sheridan. All those naughty thoughts and fantasies filling your head. No wonder she has trouble staying conscious. He is drop-dead gorgeous," Ivy sighed. Visions of Sam flashing before her eyes. "Geez," Kay hissed. "You haven't.you know.in a very long time, have you? And they say teens have sex on the brain. Obviously they haven't met you."

"Did you mean it?" Luis asked seriously. Staring into Sheridan's blue eyes. Sheridan opened her mouth to speak but no words would NOT come out. 'Hell, yes!' she wanted to shout. But all that would come out was a tiny squeak. "Cause if you meant it.I." "What? What, Luis?" she whispered softly. Barely able to breathe. "I think.I think." "Okay, Elmer Fudd," Kay rolled her eyes. "He's just as bad as her." "Shut up," Gwen hushed. Ivy crossed her fingers. "I think I l-l-." "DIOS MIO! LUIS! MIJO! IT'S TERRIBLE, MIJO," Pilar burst through the cottage door in tears. Julian seconds behind her. Chugging a stiff brandy. "Mama? What is it, Mama?" Luis asked. Jumping to his feet. Sheridan slumped against the couch cushions wearily. Dammit, dammit, dammit, she screamed silently. Always an interruption. Ivy, Kay, AND Gwen jerked their heads back. "Your sister," Julian spat. "Theresa? What about Theresa?" Pilar shoved the newspaper into Luis's hands.

"THERESA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Sheridan took the newspaper from his hands, and her blue eyes nearly popped out of their sockets. "Oh god," she groaned. "They didn't." "They DID," Luis roared. 'What?' Ivy mouthed. Kay shrugged her shoulders. "Come on," Kay whispered. "Come on. Read it. Read it." "Crane Heir elopes with Bride of Chucky!" "Oh my god!" Kay snickered. THUD! "Poor Ethan. I'm so sorry, Gwen. But hey.now you're free to go after Uncle Hank. He's a great guy. Really. Gwen? Gwen!" Ivy stepped over Gwen's prone body, stomped out of the kitchen and snatched the newspaper out of Sheridan's hands. "Where is he? I'm going to kill that son of mine! She isn't even out of high school!" "Ivy," Sheridan gasped in surprise. "Where did you come from?" Ivy ignored her and stalked out the door. Luis close behind her. And of course, Sheridan *had* to go. She had a few choice words for Ethan. "Hey! Wait up for me!" Kay called. "Sorry, Gwen. I can't miss this!" she apologized. Before racing off after the angry mob.



Chapter 45



"ETHAN SAMUEL CRANE!"

"Ethan Sam.Ivy Dear," Julian muttered sarcastically. "Don't you mean Ethan Julian Crane?" "Not now, Julian," Ivy barked impatiently. "Ethan! Unlock this door this instant!" Pilar bowed her head and prayed softly in Spanish. "Would you put a plug in it!" Julian spat. "So annoying," he confided to Sheridan. "Sheridan Dear," he grumbled. "You haven't run off and eloped with Officer Enchilada have you?" "JULIAN!" "OOOOOWWWW!" Julian screamed like a woman when Sheridan shoved him in the chest. "His name is Luis. L.U.I.S," Sheridan spelled. "What did I miss? Did I miss anything?" Julian looked down his nose at Kay. "And who might I ask are you? The Little Match Girl?" "Well, well," Kay snarled. "If it isn't the Dirty Old Man."

Ivy's fists pounded on Ethan's bedroom door. "Mot.ouch!" "Serves him right," Kay whispered. Grinning broadly when Ivy's fist connected soundly with Ethan's head. "Did you hear that? Maybe I should start calling him the Hollow Man. There's nothing in there. I mean there can't be. He married her," she shuddered. Sheridan raised a hand to her mouth at the sight of Theresa. "Aww. Isn't it sweet? Your nephew finally got the life-size Barbie he always wanted." Luis glared at Kay. "Okay," Kay grumbled. "Sorry." "Mommy," Ethan pouted. "Why did you hit me?" Kay's eyes almost rolled all the way back in her head. "EEEEEEEEETTTTTTHHHHHAAANNNNN!!!!! Your family's here to welcome me into the family. Isn't that nice of them?" she bubbled.

"Mija!" Pilar gasped in shame. "Where are your clothes?" "Mama," Theresa twittered. Batting her big brown eyes at Ethan. "It's my honeymoon." "Yeah, Pilar. It's her honeymoon," Julian added gleefully. "Yuck," Kay groaned. "No wonder she hasn't had any." "Huh?" Sheridan asked cluelessly. "Theresa.you look wuvly," Julian slurred. "Oh thank you, Mr. Crane!" Theresa gushed. Hugging his neck tightly. "THERESITA!" "Theresa!" "Aww. Luis.are you jealous?" "Ethan my boy," Julian grinned. Giving his son a thumbs up sign. "Not too bright, is she? Those are the best kind. How is she in.the you know."

"What Father?" Ethan asked dumbly. "In the." "Alright! Alright! Forgive me for saying this.but I SO do NOT want to hear this!" Sheridan yelled. "I know the feeling," Kay agreed. "Dizziness. Overwhelming nausea. Hysterical blindness. Fear for the all mankind's future. Oh my god! Just think if they have children. The world is going to Hell in a Handbasket." "That's impossible," Luis ground out. "No, it's not, Luis." Theresa grinned proudly. "I'm a woman now." Pilar sobbed quietly. "Come on, Theresa. We're getting this 'marriage' annulled. You're under-aged." "And she's NEVER been in her right mind," Kay added. "NO! LUIS! You can't. No," Theresa screamed hysterically as Luis pulled her by the arm.

"Fa.Father! What's Wuis doing?" "He's taking your little Chiquita Banana, Son. Stand up to him. Don't let him do such a thing." "JULIAN!" Ivy screamed. "Are you even hearing what you're spewing?" "Aunt Sweridan," Ethan pouted. "Don't let Wuis do this to us. We're in wuv," he slurred. "Ther.she adores me," he said in a hushed whisper. "She says she's wuved me ever since she met me." "Is that what she said?" Kay scoffed. "She's loved you? Listen Forrest.where I come from.we call it a Fatal Attraction. You should be scared. Very scared, Dumby. This is one of those 'run for your life' moments."

"Don't do this, Luis! Please! Please don't! I love him! I've loved him my whole life!" Theresa cried. "Luis.is she okay?" Sheridan asked worriedly. "That?" Kay groaned. "No.she is NOT having a Grand Mal seizure. It just looks like it." "Mommy.mommy, I'm scared," Ethan cowered. Theresa threw herself down on her knees. "ETHAN! ETHAN! TELL THEM! YOU LOVE ME!" "Filthy, stinking drunks," Kay muttered. "No," Sheridan said in a puzzled voice. "Ethan, maybe. But I don't think." "Theresa's NOT drunk," Luis sighed.

"Ethan?" Sheridan smacked her nephew upside the head. "The lights are on, but nobody's home," Kay smirked. "You can say that again." "Gwen! I'm so glad you're alright. Ooo. Does that hurt?" Gwen rolled her eyes and rubbed the goose egg on the back of her head. "Not as much as it could," she answered. Staring into Ethan's clueless blue eyes. "Gwen.don't worry. This marriage.it won't last," Ivy consoled. "Ethan belongs with you." "I'm not so sure," Gwen said softly. "Ethan?" "Hen?" Kay and Sheridan snickered helplessly. "Do you love her? Does she make you happy?" "Yeah," Ethan said stupidly. "He's my whole world," Theresa babbled. "I'd die without him. I really would," she cried earnestly. "Damn," Kay swore softly. "If only." "Okay," Gwen smiled. "O-O-O-kay?" Ethan stuttered. "Okay! Okay! Oh! Thank you, Gwen! Thank you!"

Luis shook his head helplessly. Why fight it? "IT'S FATE, ETHAN! IT'S FATE! WE'RE MEANT TO BE TOGETHER! FOREVER AND ALWAYS! DESTINED!" "Come on, Pilar," Sheridan said. Placing a comforting arm around Pilar's waist. "God help you," Kay said in all seriousness. "God help you. Hurry up, Gwen. Let's go drown your sorrows," Kay said gleefully. "I knew you were smart. You have to hook up with Uncle Hank." Gwen's laughter echoed in the halls. "Soon!" "Dear Lord!" Julian cringed. "It's not necessary to." Ivy grew faint as she watched her son swap spit with Pilar's unbalanced daughter. "Julian," she said weakly. "I need a stiff drink." Julian's ears perked up. And he smiled devilishly. He was always up for another drink.