Part 33
Mending Fences
Thursday 6 pm
"Are you sure about this, Buffy?" Joyce asked for about the
hundredth time since Buffy had gotten home from school. "I mean,
I respect your opinion, but I'm not so sure I want THAT MAN in
my house." she said with a frown.
"Mom, 'that man' is my Watcher. Whether you or I like he fact or
not, we don't get a say in the matter. He's _not_ my favorite
person in the world right now, but I'm in a giving mood at the
moment. Xander gave me another chance, I feel like I owe Giles
at least the offer of that much. So just give him an opportunity
to explain his side of things, and see where we go from here.
Okay?"
"Fine," Joyce huffed and turned away to tidy up the room.
"Besides, don't you miss him? Even though this is _so_ not a
conversation I ever wanted to have with my mother. But there are
a lot worse men you could get involved with. I'd like to believe
that Giles means well most of the time, and as far as I could
tell he always treated you right. Didn't he?"
"Yes, but--"
The sound of the doorbell ended round one, as Buffy went to
answer the door. She greeted Xander with a smile and a kiss,
before pulling him inside. "I'm _so_ glad you're here," she
said. "Tell her" she pointed to her mother, "why we're doing
this again?"
"Because you're both incredibly forgiving women?" Xander replied
with a grin. "And because I talked to Giles this afternoon, and
I really think you need to hear what he has to say? And because
you trust me?"
"I _suppose_ we can trust you," Joyce said with a shrug, before
wandering into the kitchen.
"She _supposes_?" Xander questioned Buffy disbelievingly.
"Oh, she's just in a mood," Buffy said with a smile. "She loves
you, you know that. She's so thrilled we're back together, I'm
afraid I spoiled the happiness by telling her I wanted to invite
Giles over."
He followed her into the living room, and they sat next to each
other on the couch. They suddenly felt awkward and uneasy, the
initial happy reunion of the night before being over. Xander
thought better of putting his arm around Buffy's shoulders, and
Buffy thought better of putting her hand on his thigh. Buffy
didn't want to crowd Xander, push him into the closeness they'd
once had. He'd made it clear they had some work to do to rebuild
their relationship, and she accepted that. She knew she had to
regain his trust, and was willing to do everything possible in
order to do just that.
Xander, on the other hand, was letting his insecurities get the
better of him. After Buffy had left the night before, he'd done
a lot of thinking. Willow would say too much thinking, he
realized. He couldn't help it though, he felt like he would wake
from this dream sooner than he wanted to. After all, how long
could Buffy possibly go before discovering she'd made the wrong
decision in choosing him? When even his own father couldn't
stand the sight of him, he didin't have much hope in keeping a
girlfriend around for long.
He shook himself out of those melancholy thoughts, though. He
had Buffy with him now, and that was what was important. He'd
give the relationship everything he had, that was all he could
do. He didn't have any control over whatever happened in the
future, so there was no point in worrying about it.
He looked over to see her looking at him worriedly. He smiled,
"I'm sorry, Buff, I didn't mean to disappear on you like that."
"It's okay. It's not like you need to be here, after all, while
Giles and I have it out," she said with a shrug. "But thank you
_for_ being here. Your support means so much to me."
"You don't have to thank me, Buffy. And as for my not needing to
be here, where else would I be?" Xander replied putting his arm
around her shoulders and pulling her close. "This is important
to you, so it's important to me too. I love you," He said, and
kissed her gently.
Buffy felt relieved as he pulled her close, she always felt
better in his arms. "I don't deserve you," she said looking at
him in wonder. She couldn't believe his ability to forgive her,
after everything she'd put him through.
"I'd contend it's the other way around," Xander said with a
smile. They were interrupted by arguing the point further by the
doorbell. Xander saw the look of uncertainty in Buffy's eyes,
and smiled at her reassuringly. "It'll be okay. I promise."
"Oookay," she said with a shrug. She stood and walked to the
door, opening it. "Giles," she said more calmly than she felt.
"Come in." She stood back to let the man enter. In the light of
the room, she realized how awful he looked. He had dark circles
under his eyes, which meant he hadn't been sleeping well. He
wasn't able to look her in the eyes, as she took his coat,
instead settling on the floor.
Buffy felt her pent-up anger leave her suddenly as she saw how
terrible he obviously felt. He was apparently beating himself up
more than she ever could. She sighed in resignation, and
motioned him into the living room.
"Thank you," he said quietly as he preceded her in. He took a
chair across from her as she settled next to Xander again.
"Buffy I--"
"Wait for Mom," she said. She wanted all of this to be done
quickly and at once.
"Of course," he said, nodding.
Joyce walked in then, Buffy heard her stop right behind herself
and Xander. "Come sit, Mom," Buffy requested.
"Dinner's almost ready," Joyce mumbled in reply before walking
out again.
Buffy had noticed the way Giles expression had brightened when
her mother had first walked in, and she realized she'd seen that
look before. It was the way he'd looked at Miss Calendar when
she wasn't paying attention to him. Then she caught the stricken
look Giles sent after her mom as she left abruptly, and she
realized she'd seen that look before, too. She'd seen it on
Giles' face often after Jenny's death. That was the hopeless
grief of a man who had lost the woman he'd loved.
*He does love her* she realized for the first time since her
mother and Giles had started seeing each other. She also found
herself not wanting them to break up, to her surprise. "Excuse
me," Buffy said, before standing and walking out to find her
mother.
Buffy found her in the kitchen, staring out the window over the
sink. "Mom? Can we get this over with, please?" she asked.
"I can't," Joyce said, as she turned to look at her daughter,
her face full of sadness. "I thought I could do this, Buffy, but
I can't. What he did, I can't forgive it. You're my only child,
and he almost made sure that I lost you forever."
"Mom, he cares about both of us, he wouldn't be here if he
didn't," Buffy replied. "Come out and hear what he has to say.
Please? Do it for me?"
Joyce thought for a moment. She finally nodded, and said, "I did
tell you I would. Lead the way."
Xander heard the two women returning and sighed with relief.
*Hopefully that means progress.* He had tried but failed to get
Giles to say much while they were waiting for them to return. He
knew the man probably felt he was awaiting his lynching. He felt
sorry for Giles, they'd already had it out and Xander knew he
regretted his actions on Buffy's birthday.
Buffy returned to his side, and e put his left arm around her
shoulders, and took her right hand in his. He smiled as he felt
her noticeably relax against him, snuggling aginst his chest. He
definitely didn't mind that.
He loked over as Joyce sat in a chair to his left, and he winced
as he saw the way she glared at Giles. She'd be difficult to get
through to, he realized.
Giles finally spoke, as no one else did. "Thank you... both of
you, for allowing me to come over," he said as he looked at
Buffy and Joyce. "I know you don't really want me here, so I'll
get right to the point. I just wanted a chance to tell you how
very sorry I am, for what happened.
Buffy," he paused to look at his charge. "I can never apologize
enough for what happened. Putting you, Xander, and Angel in that
situation...all three of you could have been killed. I wouldn't
blame you if you could never forgive me. I don't know that I can
ever forgive myself.
I know that you and your friends trusted me. I treated that
trust without the proper amount of respect. I knew when I was
... drugging you" he forced himself to say it, and Buffy could
see it wasn't easy "that I was betraying the trust you placed in
me, and possibly destroying it forever. I could try to defend
myself by saying that I was doing my duty, following orders,
etcetera, but I won't.
There is no defense for my actions. I put your very life in
danger, something that a Watcher should never do. I despise
myself for being that weak, I will regret the consequences of
that weakness until the day I die. I can never apologize enough,
nor can I expect you to forgive me.
"As I told Xander earlier, I regret deeply that my actions
caused his life to be endangered, as well as yours. If either of
you had died--"
Giles looked down at the floor, suddenly, but Buffy saw the
tears in his eyes. She knew that he was speaking the truth, he
hated what he'd done.
He finally spoke again, "And Joyce..." he sighed, a long, sad
sigh. "I know that I hurt you deeply, by putting your daughter
in such danger. I realize you must hate me, and I deserve that.
I wish I'd done things differently."
He stood then, and said, "I'll go, I don't want to take up any
more of your time." He walked to the door, and turned, saying,
"Oh. And Buffy, the Council has ...well, fired me to put it
bluntly. A new Watcher will be in Sunnydale by Monday."
Buffy frowned at the floor as she heard the door close behind
her. *Fired? For what? He did their stupid test, didn't he?*
Xander guessed what she was thinking, and said, "No. He was
supposed to give you another dose of the drug, but he refused to
do it. It's a good thing, too, because it probably would have
knocked you out too much..."
"I wouldn't have been able to stop the vamp from killing you,"
she realized just how close she'd come to losing him forever.
"Xan..."
"Go on," he said pressing a quick kiss to her forehead.
Buffy ran out, just as Giles was getting into his car. "Giles!"
He looked up in surprise, and walked toward her slowly. "Yes?"
he asked hesitantly.
Buffy looked at him for a moment in silence. She'd never really
thought about it consciously, but she knew he was more to her
than just her Watcher. He'd been more of a father to her in the
past two years than her real dad ever had been. That's why it
had hurt so much when he'd almost caused her, Xander, and
Angel's deaths. It was like she'd been betrayed by a member of
her family, not just a man assigned by the Council to be her
Watcher.
Now, though, she couldn't help wondering if maybe she was
assuming too much about their relationship. Maybe she shouldn't
have expected him to do anything more than just follow orders.
It was just possible she was nothing more to him than just a
job, and she'd just been setting herself up for something like
this all along by assuming otherwise. But the only way to know
the answer to this question, was to just ask him. As much as she
dreaded the answer.
"I want to ask you something. And be totally honest with me,
okay?" she asked finally.
"Of course. I promise."
"If you had the choice again, but knowing how everything would
turn out... If you had to choose between me and the Council, who
would you choose?"
"You. No question about it," Giles said quickly. "My first
loyalty should have been to you."
Buffy regarded him for a moment, before nodding, and saying, "I
hoped you'd say that. My next question is, why?"
"Why what?" Giles looked at her, confusion written on his face.
"Why should you have stayed loyal to me?" she explained. "I
mean, was it just because that's your job, and you disagree with
the way the Council wanted things to go?" She hesitated,
wondering if she was going to make a complete fool of herself.
She sighed, and shrugged slightly. If that was going to happen,
it wouldn't be the first time. "Or is it because we're..." she
fumbled for a word, "friends, and not just Watcher and Slayer,
so..." she trailed off, and looked at the ground.
Giles looked at her in disbelief for a moment, before replying.
"Buffy, if I've made you doubt that you are more important to me
than just as the Slayer I've been assigned to watch, then I'm a
complete ass."
Buffy giggled, and looked up at him. He caught the hopeful look
in her eyes, and smiled. "I have come to think of you as a
friend, Buffy. And sometimes..."
"Sometimes?" Buffy prodded, as Giles didn't seem willing to
finish the thought.
"Sometimes, I think you're exactly the type of young lady I'd
want as a daughter, if I'd ever had children."
Buffy's eyes lit up, and she sighed in relief. "Giles, if it was
up to you, would you still want to be my Watcher?"
Giles blinked at her for a moment, trying to adapt to the sudden
change in subject. He felt relieved, at least, that she hadn't
laughed at his sudden revelation about how he felt about her. He
finally recovered his voice. "I can't believe you'd even
consider letting me..."
"I'm willing to give you a chance to prove yourself trustworthy
again," Buffy replied. "That's all I can promise you. Besides,
you should know that this little meeting was largely because of
Xander's persuasive powers. If he's willing to forgive you, I
guess I don't have a place to hold a grudge."
"I don't know what to say..." Giles said, with a shrug.
"Say 'Yes I want to be your Watcher' or 'No thanks'," Buffy
replied patiently. "We'll figure the rest out a little bit at a
time."
"Well, yes, of course. I ... but the Council--"
"The Council can all go to hell for all I care," Buffy cut him
off angrily. "As far as I'm concerned, I don't want any part of
an organization that tries to kill the girls they're supposed to
be protecting. There's just something wrong with that way of
thinking, Giles. I'm through with them, but that doesn't mean
I'm through with being the Slayer. From what I've learned about
my calling, it has a lot less to do with them than they'd like
to think. Right?"
"Well, yes, we're just charged with protecting the Slayer, not
technically the ones who decide who she will be..." Giles
agreed.
"And I don't want another Watcher," Buffy added. "It took me
long enough to break you in. You and I finally got to the point
where we understood each other, and I don't feel like going
through all that mess again with someone new. So if you're
willing to stay on, even unofficially, as my Watcher, why do I
really need the Council, anyway?"
"I suppose I'll get nowhere by telling you it's incredibly
dangerous to rebel against them..." Giles said with a sigh.
"I'm shaking," Buffy said sarcastically. "But if you're afraid
of them--"
"Hardly!" Giles said with a frown. "I'm quite finished with
them, no matter what your decision, Buffy. I can't be a part of
their philosophy anymore."
"All right then, it's settled. I'll see you tomorrow afternoon
and we'll get some training done, okay?"
"I... okay," Giles said with a smile. "And thank you."
"You're welcome, Giles. But remember, you're not out of the
doghouse until I'm convinced I can trust you again."
"That's fair enough," Giles nodded. "Good night, Buffy."
"G'nite," Buffy said, and turned to go. "Oh, Giles? You aren't
giving up on Mom, are you? Because I can't think of a better man
to have as a step-father some day."
Giles' jaw dropped, as this was the closest she'd come yet to
saying she thought of him as a father. "I was under the
impression you were never thrilled with us seeing each other."
"I acted like a spoiled brat at first, as I do with all the guys
Mom dates. But the more I think about it, I can think of a lot
worse guys for her to be seeing. And you made her happy, Giles.
So ... yeah, I hope you two can work it out."
"That means so much coming from you, Buffy," Giles said. "I'm
not planning on giving up any time soon, but--"
"Just think positive," Buffy said. "I've learned that if
something is meant to be, it always seems to work itself out."
"I hope you're right," Giles said with a smile. "Well,
goodnight."
"G'nite Giles," she replied with a smile of her own. She watched
as he drove off, then went back into the house.
Mending Fences
Thursday 6 pm
"Are you sure about this, Buffy?" Joyce asked for about the
hundredth time since Buffy had gotten home from school. "I mean,
I respect your opinion, but I'm not so sure I want THAT MAN in
my house." she said with a frown.
"Mom, 'that man' is my Watcher. Whether you or I like he fact or
not, we don't get a say in the matter. He's _not_ my favorite
person in the world right now, but I'm in a giving mood at the
moment. Xander gave me another chance, I feel like I owe Giles
at least the offer of that much. So just give him an opportunity
to explain his side of things, and see where we go from here.
Okay?"
"Fine," Joyce huffed and turned away to tidy up the room.
"Besides, don't you miss him? Even though this is _so_ not a
conversation I ever wanted to have with my mother. But there are
a lot worse men you could get involved with. I'd like to believe
that Giles means well most of the time, and as far as I could
tell he always treated you right. Didn't he?"
"Yes, but--"
The sound of the doorbell ended round one, as Buffy went to
answer the door. She greeted Xander with a smile and a kiss,
before pulling him inside. "I'm _so_ glad you're here," she
said. "Tell her" she pointed to her mother, "why we're doing
this again?"
"Because you're both incredibly forgiving women?" Xander replied
with a grin. "And because I talked to Giles this afternoon, and
I really think you need to hear what he has to say? And because
you trust me?"
"I _suppose_ we can trust you," Joyce said with a shrug, before
wandering into the kitchen.
"She _supposes_?" Xander questioned Buffy disbelievingly.
"Oh, she's just in a mood," Buffy said with a smile. "She loves
you, you know that. She's so thrilled we're back together, I'm
afraid I spoiled the happiness by telling her I wanted to invite
Giles over."
He followed her into the living room, and they sat next to each
other on the couch. They suddenly felt awkward and uneasy, the
initial happy reunion of the night before being over. Xander
thought better of putting his arm around Buffy's shoulders, and
Buffy thought better of putting her hand on his thigh. Buffy
didn't want to crowd Xander, push him into the closeness they'd
once had. He'd made it clear they had some work to do to rebuild
their relationship, and she accepted that. She knew she had to
regain his trust, and was willing to do everything possible in
order to do just that.
Xander, on the other hand, was letting his insecurities get the
better of him. After Buffy had left the night before, he'd done
a lot of thinking. Willow would say too much thinking, he
realized. He couldn't help it though, he felt like he would wake
from this dream sooner than he wanted to. After all, how long
could Buffy possibly go before discovering she'd made the wrong
decision in choosing him? When even his own father couldn't
stand the sight of him, he didin't have much hope in keeping a
girlfriend around for long.
He shook himself out of those melancholy thoughts, though. He
had Buffy with him now, and that was what was important. He'd
give the relationship everything he had, that was all he could
do. He didn't have any control over whatever happened in the
future, so there was no point in worrying about it.
He looked over to see her looking at him worriedly. He smiled,
"I'm sorry, Buff, I didn't mean to disappear on you like that."
"It's okay. It's not like you need to be here, after all, while
Giles and I have it out," she said with a shrug. "But thank you
_for_ being here. Your support means so much to me."
"You don't have to thank me, Buffy. And as for my not needing to
be here, where else would I be?" Xander replied putting his arm
around her shoulders and pulling her close. "This is important
to you, so it's important to me too. I love you," He said, and
kissed her gently.
Buffy felt relieved as he pulled her close, she always felt
better in his arms. "I don't deserve you," she said looking at
him in wonder. She couldn't believe his ability to forgive her,
after everything she'd put him through.
"I'd contend it's the other way around," Xander said with a
smile. They were interrupted by arguing the point further by the
doorbell. Xander saw the look of uncertainty in Buffy's eyes,
and smiled at her reassuringly. "It'll be okay. I promise."
"Oookay," she said with a shrug. She stood and walked to the
door, opening it. "Giles," she said more calmly than she felt.
"Come in." She stood back to let the man enter. In the light of
the room, she realized how awful he looked. He had dark circles
under his eyes, which meant he hadn't been sleeping well. He
wasn't able to look her in the eyes, as she took his coat,
instead settling on the floor.
Buffy felt her pent-up anger leave her suddenly as she saw how
terrible he obviously felt. He was apparently beating himself up
more than she ever could. She sighed in resignation, and
motioned him into the living room.
"Thank you," he said quietly as he preceded her in. He took a
chair across from her as she settled next to Xander again.
"Buffy I--"
"Wait for Mom," she said. She wanted all of this to be done
quickly and at once.
"Of course," he said, nodding.
Joyce walked in then, Buffy heard her stop right behind herself
and Xander. "Come sit, Mom," Buffy requested.
"Dinner's almost ready," Joyce mumbled in reply before walking
out again.
Buffy had noticed the way Giles expression had brightened when
her mother had first walked in, and she realized she'd seen that
look before. It was the way he'd looked at Miss Calendar when
she wasn't paying attention to him. Then she caught the stricken
look Giles sent after her mom as she left abruptly, and she
realized she'd seen that look before, too. She'd seen it on
Giles' face often after Jenny's death. That was the hopeless
grief of a man who had lost the woman he'd loved.
*He does love her* she realized for the first time since her
mother and Giles had started seeing each other. She also found
herself not wanting them to break up, to her surprise. "Excuse
me," Buffy said, before standing and walking out to find her
mother.
Buffy found her in the kitchen, staring out the window over the
sink. "Mom? Can we get this over with, please?" she asked.
"I can't," Joyce said, as she turned to look at her daughter,
her face full of sadness. "I thought I could do this, Buffy, but
I can't. What he did, I can't forgive it. You're my only child,
and he almost made sure that I lost you forever."
"Mom, he cares about both of us, he wouldn't be here if he
didn't," Buffy replied. "Come out and hear what he has to say.
Please? Do it for me?"
Joyce thought for a moment. She finally nodded, and said, "I did
tell you I would. Lead the way."
Xander heard the two women returning and sighed with relief.
*Hopefully that means progress.* He had tried but failed to get
Giles to say much while they were waiting for them to return. He
knew the man probably felt he was awaiting his lynching. He felt
sorry for Giles, they'd already had it out and Xander knew he
regretted his actions on Buffy's birthday.
Buffy returned to his side, and e put his left arm around her
shoulders, and took her right hand in his. He smiled as he felt
her noticeably relax against him, snuggling aginst his chest. He
definitely didn't mind that.
He loked over as Joyce sat in a chair to his left, and he winced
as he saw the way she glared at Giles. She'd be difficult to get
through to, he realized.
Giles finally spoke, as no one else did. "Thank you... both of
you, for allowing me to come over," he said as he looked at
Buffy and Joyce. "I know you don't really want me here, so I'll
get right to the point. I just wanted a chance to tell you how
very sorry I am, for what happened.
Buffy," he paused to look at his charge. "I can never apologize
enough for what happened. Putting you, Xander, and Angel in that
situation...all three of you could have been killed. I wouldn't
blame you if you could never forgive me. I don't know that I can
ever forgive myself.
I know that you and your friends trusted me. I treated that
trust without the proper amount of respect. I knew when I was
... drugging you" he forced himself to say it, and Buffy could
see it wasn't easy "that I was betraying the trust you placed in
me, and possibly destroying it forever. I could try to defend
myself by saying that I was doing my duty, following orders,
etcetera, but I won't.
There is no defense for my actions. I put your very life in
danger, something that a Watcher should never do. I despise
myself for being that weak, I will regret the consequences of
that weakness until the day I die. I can never apologize enough,
nor can I expect you to forgive me.
"As I told Xander earlier, I regret deeply that my actions
caused his life to be endangered, as well as yours. If either of
you had died--"
Giles looked down at the floor, suddenly, but Buffy saw the
tears in his eyes. She knew that he was speaking the truth, he
hated what he'd done.
He finally spoke again, "And Joyce..." he sighed, a long, sad
sigh. "I know that I hurt you deeply, by putting your daughter
in such danger. I realize you must hate me, and I deserve that.
I wish I'd done things differently."
He stood then, and said, "I'll go, I don't want to take up any
more of your time." He walked to the door, and turned, saying,
"Oh. And Buffy, the Council has ...well, fired me to put it
bluntly. A new Watcher will be in Sunnydale by Monday."
Buffy frowned at the floor as she heard the door close behind
her. *Fired? For what? He did their stupid test, didn't he?*
Xander guessed what she was thinking, and said, "No. He was
supposed to give you another dose of the drug, but he refused to
do it. It's a good thing, too, because it probably would have
knocked you out too much..."
"I wouldn't have been able to stop the vamp from killing you,"
she realized just how close she'd come to losing him forever.
"Xan..."
"Go on," he said pressing a quick kiss to her forehead.
Buffy ran out, just as Giles was getting into his car. "Giles!"
He looked up in surprise, and walked toward her slowly. "Yes?"
he asked hesitantly.
Buffy looked at him for a moment in silence. She'd never really
thought about it consciously, but she knew he was more to her
than just her Watcher. He'd been more of a father to her in the
past two years than her real dad ever had been. That's why it
had hurt so much when he'd almost caused her, Xander, and
Angel's deaths. It was like she'd been betrayed by a member of
her family, not just a man assigned by the Council to be her
Watcher.
Now, though, she couldn't help wondering if maybe she was
assuming too much about their relationship. Maybe she shouldn't
have expected him to do anything more than just follow orders.
It was just possible she was nothing more to him than just a
job, and she'd just been setting herself up for something like
this all along by assuming otherwise. But the only way to know
the answer to this question, was to just ask him. As much as she
dreaded the answer.
"I want to ask you something. And be totally honest with me,
okay?" she asked finally.
"Of course. I promise."
"If you had the choice again, but knowing how everything would
turn out... If you had to choose between me and the Council, who
would you choose?"
"You. No question about it," Giles said quickly. "My first
loyalty should have been to you."
Buffy regarded him for a moment, before nodding, and saying, "I
hoped you'd say that. My next question is, why?"
"Why what?" Giles looked at her, confusion written on his face.
"Why should you have stayed loyal to me?" she explained. "I
mean, was it just because that's your job, and you disagree with
the way the Council wanted things to go?" She hesitated,
wondering if she was going to make a complete fool of herself.
She sighed, and shrugged slightly. If that was going to happen,
it wouldn't be the first time. "Or is it because we're..." she
fumbled for a word, "friends, and not just Watcher and Slayer,
so..." she trailed off, and looked at the ground.
Giles looked at her in disbelief for a moment, before replying.
"Buffy, if I've made you doubt that you are more important to me
than just as the Slayer I've been assigned to watch, then I'm a
complete ass."
Buffy giggled, and looked up at him. He caught the hopeful look
in her eyes, and smiled. "I have come to think of you as a
friend, Buffy. And sometimes..."
"Sometimes?" Buffy prodded, as Giles didn't seem willing to
finish the thought.
"Sometimes, I think you're exactly the type of young lady I'd
want as a daughter, if I'd ever had children."
Buffy's eyes lit up, and she sighed in relief. "Giles, if it was
up to you, would you still want to be my Watcher?"
Giles blinked at her for a moment, trying to adapt to the sudden
change in subject. He felt relieved, at least, that she hadn't
laughed at his sudden revelation about how he felt about her. He
finally recovered his voice. "I can't believe you'd even
consider letting me..."
"I'm willing to give you a chance to prove yourself trustworthy
again," Buffy replied. "That's all I can promise you. Besides,
you should know that this little meeting was largely because of
Xander's persuasive powers. If he's willing to forgive you, I
guess I don't have a place to hold a grudge."
"I don't know what to say..." Giles said, with a shrug.
"Say 'Yes I want to be your Watcher' or 'No thanks'," Buffy
replied patiently. "We'll figure the rest out a little bit at a
time."
"Well, yes, of course. I ... but the Council--"
"The Council can all go to hell for all I care," Buffy cut him
off angrily. "As far as I'm concerned, I don't want any part of
an organization that tries to kill the girls they're supposed to
be protecting. There's just something wrong with that way of
thinking, Giles. I'm through with them, but that doesn't mean
I'm through with being the Slayer. From what I've learned about
my calling, it has a lot less to do with them than they'd like
to think. Right?"
"Well, yes, we're just charged with protecting the Slayer, not
technically the ones who decide who she will be..." Giles
agreed.
"And I don't want another Watcher," Buffy added. "It took me
long enough to break you in. You and I finally got to the point
where we understood each other, and I don't feel like going
through all that mess again with someone new. So if you're
willing to stay on, even unofficially, as my Watcher, why do I
really need the Council, anyway?"
"I suppose I'll get nowhere by telling you it's incredibly
dangerous to rebel against them..." Giles said with a sigh.
"I'm shaking," Buffy said sarcastically. "But if you're afraid
of them--"
"Hardly!" Giles said with a frown. "I'm quite finished with
them, no matter what your decision, Buffy. I can't be a part of
their philosophy anymore."
"All right then, it's settled. I'll see you tomorrow afternoon
and we'll get some training done, okay?"
"I... okay," Giles said with a smile. "And thank you."
"You're welcome, Giles. But remember, you're not out of the
doghouse until I'm convinced I can trust you again."
"That's fair enough," Giles nodded. "Good night, Buffy."
"G'nite," Buffy said, and turned to go. "Oh, Giles? You aren't
giving up on Mom, are you? Because I can't think of a better man
to have as a step-father some day."
Giles' jaw dropped, as this was the closest she'd come yet to
saying she thought of him as a father. "I was under the
impression you were never thrilled with us seeing each other."
"I acted like a spoiled brat at first, as I do with all the guys
Mom dates. But the more I think about it, I can think of a lot
worse guys for her to be seeing. And you made her happy, Giles.
So ... yeah, I hope you two can work it out."
"That means so much coming from you, Buffy," Giles said. "I'm
not planning on giving up any time soon, but--"
"Just think positive," Buffy said. "I've learned that if
something is meant to be, it always seems to work itself out."
"I hope you're right," Giles said with a smile. "Well,
goodnight."
"G'nite Giles," she replied with a smile of her own. She watched
as he drove off, then went back into the house.
