Author/ff.net: Azrael
Paring: Harry P./Ron W.
Rating: PG for this chapter.
Disclaimer: JK Rowlind owns them, Harry, Ron, Hermione, the lot, but I own Ruelf,
or at least I think so.
Warning: **slash** hope you know what that means.
Notes: Harry and Ron comes to a decision that might affect their friendship
forever. Seeing as I have two ongoing fics, I decided to concentrate on my
Oliver/Percy fic, so I might not update this story for some time. Though
be assured that I would be continuing writing this story.
*********
Chapter 3: Decisions
Hermione didn't know what she expected them to say, but what came out of their mouths definitely wasn't on her list.
"Are you crazy?" Harry exclaimed. Harry's words were a little extreme, she thought, but what came out of Ron's mouth was promising, very promising indeed.
Ron stood up and walked to the brick fireplace. He placed his hands in his jeans pocket and rocked back on his heels, as Hermione's idea formed fully in his mind. "You know what? Hermione might be on to something."
"What?" Harry asked, the amazement clear in his voice. He thought that Hermione's statement was ludicrous and that his friend had turned daft, but Ron, well for him to even consider… Harry needed to call St. Mungo's fast and reserve two rooms for two new patients.
"I think Hermione's right, you could be Ruelf's new mo…errrr… Daddy,"
"You're daft, both of you. Hermione, what were you thinking? I've always thought that you were the most intelligent one of us all, now I see that you've gone psycho when I wasn't looking."
Hermione looked on, and wrung her hands in front of her. "Why not? Why is it crazy? You love Ruelf, Ruelf loves you. Ron loves you, and I'm sure you love Ron."
"What? Ron loves me." Harry asked incredulously.
Ron sat next to Harry. "Of course I do. You're my best friend since forever."
"We may love each other, Ron, but we're not in love with one another, I mean you love Hermione too, why don't you ask her to be the new mommy?" Harry stood and started pacing across the room.
Ron gave Hermione a grin, and explained, "Well, you know I can't… Herm-own-ninny here is already married and I don't think that Viktor is the generous type."
Hermione stood up and walked over to where Harry had stopped and looked him in the eye. "Look Harry, you've told us over and over again that passion doesn't make a marriage. Friendship does. Friendship is more important you said. Well, you're friends, aren't you?'
He turned around and glared at them both. "You two can't really be serious about this."
Ron sat forward on the couch. "Now that I think about it." Though the idea was new to Ron, he was the first one to acclimate to it. "I know at first it sounds crazy, but think about it! You're already a parent figure in Ruelf's eyes. You spend more time with us than you do anybody else when you're not on the road and we know that you're the only single person I spend any amount of time with."
Harry looked at Ron… he was serious. He was really serious. "You'd do all of that for Ruelf?"
"I'd do anything for my son."
"Even marry someone you don't love?"
Ron stood up and gestured towards the picture on the mantle, it was the three of them, Ruelf, Harry and Ron, when they went fishing before Quidditch season began. "But I do love you."
"What makes you think that I'd want to marry you?"
Ron dropped his arms and stepped back.
"Why wouldn't you want to marry Ron? What's wrong with him?" Hermione all but stood in front of Ron, and stared angrily at Harry.
"That's not what I meant." Harry threw up his hands and flopped back at the couch. He leaned his head back and closed his eyes. "I can't believe that the three of us would be having this kind of conversation."
"Yeah," Ron said gruffly. "And I can't believe that you're acting as though marrying me is the most awful thing that could possibly happen to you."
The hurt in his best-friends voice caused Harry to open one eye to look at him. "I don't believe this. You're hurt because I won't consider Hermione's crazy idea?"
"It's not crazy," Hermione said in defense, "and how could you hurt Ron's feelings, at least he understands that it's a brilliant idea."
"I'm not hurt." Ron lied, he knew it was irrational but he was hurt.
"Sure you aren't. I know you, Ronald Weasly, and you're hurt. Why?"
Ron looked at Harry. "Because you act like the idea is so outrageous. It's not. I'm a good man, and a good friend. I'd make you a great husband. Why can't you even consider that?"
Harry then realized that Ron was dead serious. "This isn't about whether or not you'd make a good husband, Ron. I know that you would make a great husband. It's about Hermione's suggestion that we turn a friendship into a marriage, that is so ludicrous."
Hermione studied her folded hands. "I admit, it's a new thought, Harry, but I don't think it's ludicrous at all. You'd be perfect for one another."
"And how did you figure that one out Hermione?" Harry asked, his look skeptical.
"Firstly, Ruelf would get another parent. Second, you get a marriage that is based on friendship and a man who loves you. Most marriages don't start with those kind of odds.
"And what would Ron get out of all of this?"
"I'd get a parent for my son and a friend to share my life with."
"You're both serious about this?"
Ron nodded. "I admit, at first I really didn't give it much thought, but it sounds about right. Think about it?"
"I have thought about it and it still sounds crazy."
"Why is it crazy?" Hermione's demanded.
"Because Ron and I are friends, not lovers." Harry knew that he was repeating himself but they both needed to understand.
"Haven't you been telling us that the best basis for marriage is friendship? You've already had the passion?" Hermione reminded him.
That remark had hurt but before Harry could tell her that, Ron had already spoken. "Besides it wouldn't have to be a real marriage. I need a parent for Ruelf more than I need a partner."
"Not a real marriage?" Harry asked, this conversation is getting crazier and crazier by the moment.
"You know," Ron said, finding the wall attractive all of a sudden. "No sex."
Harry laughed. At his words, at this silly conversation that Hermione had started. "No sex?"
Ron cleared his throat and looked up at him. "Unless you want it, that is. I won't pressure you or anything."
Harry shook his head slowly. He had to admit that the thought of having sex with Ron wasn't a new one. He'd thought about it more than once when they were at Hogwarts. When that thought came across him mind, it wasn't a surprise. Ron was very attractive and he had some inkling that he was not only attracted to the fairer sex. He'd been his best friend and he'd trusted Ron with his life. His teenage mind had figured that maybe he could just approach Ron and do the deed and be done with it. He wouldn't have to think about it anymore. Of course, he'd never been able to mention this to Ron, or Hermione for that matter. When Fleur transferred to Hogwarts, he had been too busy chasing after her. And he did have some pride after all.
Ron touched his knee. "What are you thinking about Harry?"
He moved his leg away and Ron's hands fell away. "You and me. Being married. Living as husband and husband."
"It wouldn't be too bad," Ron said with a smug look about him. "Fleur did manage to teach me how to be a good husband."
Harry heard the note of grief in Ron's voice as he heard him talk about his wife. It made Harry want to comfort his best friend to wrap his arms around him and to console him. But he didn't dare. Not while they were having this discussion. "This marriage suggestion is not the right thing for us Ron. It's an easy answer but I don't think that it's the right one."
Hermione took Harry's hands in her smaller one. "I know this conversation sounds crazy, coming out of the blue and all. But my gut tells me that it's the right thing for you both, and Ron's serious about this."
Ron took Harry's other hand in his much larger one. "I'm very serious. I want you to be a part of my life, I want you to be my partner. To raise my son with me. You mean the world to me and Ruelf, Harry. I think you know that."
Harry looked at their hands, two hands wrapped beneath his, two people that he cared about most in the world. "You're right Hermione. I do care for Ron and Ruelf. But marriage? That's a big step."
Ron patted his hand, a very familiar gesture, but somehow to Harry it felt a little different. "Don't say no yet. Think about it some more. We can talk about it when you're ready."
Harry didn't believe thinking about it would help, but both the looks that Hermione and Ron were sending his way forced him to nod in agreement.
**********
Ron watched the fireplace long after Harry and Hermione were gone in Floo powder smoke, Hermione's suggestion still on his mind. He knew that Harry was resisting right now, but he knew that he'd come to his senses eventually and capitulate. That's the way he has always been. Even when they were younger, he always managed to go about doing things without thinking about them first. Tonight he had refused. He had expected that at least. He knew that for the two of them, Hermione's suggestion would take a bit of a time for Harry to get used to it. But Ron knew that he would agree eventually. He knew that the deciding factor for Harry would be the same deciding factor for himself - Ruelf.
Ron walked up the stairs quietly and entered his son's room. When he saw his son curled up in his bed, hugging the pillow close to him, his heart swelled with emotion. He had too much love for his son. He thanked the gods that he had come to his senses and realized how important time spent with him was. He had made his rich life that much richer with him in it. Sadness flooded him as thoughts of his wife came into his mind.
Not a day went by that Ron didn't regret the decision he'd made early in their marriage. He devoted too much time on his work as an Auror. It was a dangerous life that he did live, and he knew that each time that he was away Fleur would worry for him so. How he wished that he could have that time back. How he wished that he had become a barrister from the very beginning, after Hogwarts, so he could have shared more time with Fleur and Ruelf. But he didn't, and he couldn't. And he had to live with that.
**********
Long after the feeling of being sucked down a giant drain had ebbed (Harry never lost that particular feeling while he used Floo Powder, that's why he'd rather apparate) Harry still felt that his world was spinning. He couldn't believe that Hermione had come up with that stupid idea! Ron and Harry married? What was she thinking?
And Ron, what was he thinking to go along this harebrained scheme of Hermione. Oh, Harry had an idea of what went through that mind of his. Ruelf needed another parent and Harry was a good choice. A safe choice… A safe choice because Harry wouldn't demand more from him than he was willing to give. Ron would still be able to hang on to his love of his wife as long as he wanted.
Harry wasn't in love with Ron and Ron wasn't in love with him, but they did love each other. Was that enough to make a marriage work? Harry knew that passion alone wouldn't be enough, but was friendship? As he recalled the pain of his marriage, he knew that he could never choose a marriage based on passion alone, and though he also knew that friendship alone wouldn't be a perfect choice, he'd feel safer with the idea of entering a marital union based on the friendship that he shared with Ron, rather than dealing with the roller coaster emotions that he shared with Cho. There was something comfortable about sharing his life with Ron. Something stable, something safe. God knows that he's crazy about Ruelf. He already loved the child like he was his own.
He walked towards the kitchen, with Hedwig perched upon his shoulders to get some fresh water and some treats for his pet. After making sure that Hedwig was comfortably perched on a counter, he placed the offering near her, and walked over to the sink to wash his hands and open the kitchen window, so as to let his owl out if she wanted. Hedwig had mellowed with age and now tended to spend her time in Harry's home, even at night.
He ruffled Hedwig's feather and made his way towards his bedroom. He entered it, immediately kicking his shoes away, and began to remove his clothes. When he was down to his t-shirt and boxers, he stopped at the sight of his reflection in the full length mirror his godfather sent him last Christmas. Professor Lupin, his godfather's mate, said that it was an exact replica of the Mirror of Erised, but without the powers of sight. But the pictures that he placed on it have more than made up for it's lack of power.
Harry made a critical appraisal of himself. The mirror showed the well-maintained body of a thirty year old man. Thank the heavens for Quidditch, that sport alone had managed to prevent the appearances of some unwanted tires, particularly around his middle. He placed his left hand on his forehead and raised his bangs to look at his famous scar. Still the same, after all this years… the same person still existsed. But tonight Harry was looking way behind the scar, behind the physical façade that was his face to look at the human being inside. He had always wanted to have the same things most people wanted – love, a career, and a family. He thought that he had found it with his ex-wife. Apparently not, for that dream was shattered, and with it, he also lost that part of himself that dared to wish for such things.
Harry stretched out on his bed and stared at the ceiling, his glasses still on. Ron was lucky, he loved Fleur and Fleur had loved him. Their's was a love that even death couldn't conquer.
Fleur… Harry thought, what would she think about their idea. Would she agree with it, or would she, like Harry think that it was a waste of time to even consider it. At that particular moment, Harry felt a cool breeze run across his body.
"Take care of my family for me Harry." A soft voice that sounded a lot like Fleur said. "Protect my family Harry, your are the boy who lived. And love them, the way that they love you."
"Fleur?" Harry called out. He sat up straighter and looked around the room. Though the breeze had passed, he still wrapped his arms around himself to ward off the chill that he felt. Was he hearing his own thoughts or was there something else going on?
Harry wasn't so sure… of all the things that he had seen in his life, he knew that everything could possibly happen. He removed his glasses and placed them on his bedside table, and lay back down on his bed. As sleep started to come over him, a feeling of calm contentment seemed to envelope his body and filled it with warmth, and suddenly, before he surrendered to his dreams, Harry Potter's path became clear.
**********
Ron pulled into Harry's driveway the next morning. He opened the front door of his Ford Anglia (who at their last year at Hogwarts decided to come out of the Dark Forest and go back to the Weasly family and his father Arthur decided that he should keep it since he lived near downtown London) and spent a few moments gathering his thoughts as he looked around Harry's neighborhood. It had always surprised him why Harry chose to live within three blocks of the Dursleys, though they had made it their lifelong goal to make Harry's life miserable, especially when Harry was young. Still Harry insisted that he live near them to keep his eye out for them. His Harry had always had a heart. His Harry, now where did that come from. Figuring that he had waited long enough, and since he was hearing voices that was not his own (or so he thought), he rang the bell and at once Harry opened the door, almost as if he had been waiting for him. Harry's welcoming smile brought a flutter of butterflies to Ron's stomach.
"Come on in. I've got coffee in the kitchen, we should talk there." He didn't wait for Ron to answer, but turned towards the kitchen.
He had no choice but to follow Harry. As he did, Hedwig, Harry's owl, welcomed him, perched herself on top of his shoulders and nipped his ears fondly. "Hey there, Hedwig," he reached down his breast pocket and took out some owl treats (he always had a stock of treats because Ron does own an owl for himself, although now Ruelf had claimed Pig for his own.) As soon as he glanced back to Harry, he couldn't help noticing the solid curves of his friends backside. He'd seen his friend in that outfit often, for as long as he can remember, but he didn't remember it looking as good as it did this morning.
"So have you thought about it?" he asked Harry as soon as he was seated in one of the stools at the kitchen counter. He wanted his best friends answer, but he also needed some conversation between them to keep his thoughts from dwelling on how delectable Harry looked, with his hair in its usual disarray, and his shirt and shorts wrinkled like he just got out of bed. Which from the looks of it he assumed that he did. Bed, Ron shook his head, he shouldn't be thinking about bed and Harry in the same context.
Harry turned to him, carrying two cups of coffee. "What else could I think about?" he asked. "It's not everyday that a man receives a marriage proposal from a bloke, much more considering that the bloke in question is one of his best friend and lifelong mates."
Ron blinked a few times. He wasn't so sure if it was sarcasm that he heard on his friend's voice, but he liked the sound "lifelong mate" although, he's sure Harry didn't mean it that way. "Well, have you decided?"
Harry's green gaze bored into Ron's and he couldn't help but feel as though Harry was looking deep into his soul. "You know that I love Ruelf like he was my own son."
Ron nodded, "Of course I know that." Somewhat relaxed now that Harry had spoken, he eased into the stool. "And you do know that Ruelf loves you just as much."
Harry raised his hand to make a point. "I don't believe in divorce when children are concerned, Ron." He looked around his kitchen for a moment before continuing. "If we do this, it has to be forever, or at least until Ruelf is an adult. He can't lose another parent, not even through divorce, it wouldn't be fair to him." Harry took two sugar cubes and dropped them into his mug. He offered some to Ron but the redhead declined.
"I agree with you. Ruelf doesn't need another parent just so he could lose him." He set his cup down before looking straight into Harry's eyes. "That's why we'd make a perfect couple. We can last forever."
Harry looked away as he lifted his cup to his lips. "But what if you fall in love with someone else?"
"I could ask the same of you." Ron reached for Harry's hand and wrapped his fingers around Harry's. "It won't happen, being in love that one time is more than enough for me."
Harry wondered at Ron's tone. It didn't sound like grief, more like acceptance. "You're willing to bet your life on it?" Harry moved his hand away.
Ron tapped his fingers on the counter as he looked at Harry. "You didn't answer my own question. What about you? Could you commit yourself to this and miss out on the love of your life?"
Cho's image appeared on Harry's mind, and it quickly disappeared as fast at it had come. "I already had the love of my life, and I lost it."
Ron merely nodded, running his hands up and down his cup. Hermione was right, he and Harry were quite a pair. They'd make this work because they both understood that friendship and commitment makes a marriage. Being in love was an unnecessary luxury. "You still haven't said whether or not you'd accept the proposal."
Harry nodded. "I do hope that I won't live to regret this."
Ron stood up and moved to Harry's side and wrapped his arms around his best friend. He couldn't help but marvel about the way they fit. He moved away as he cleared his throat. "You won't regret this Harry. I promise that I'll do everything I can to make you happy."
Harry gave the barest hint of a smile. "And I'll do my best to be the best parent that I can be for Ruelf sake."
Ron had noticed that Harry didn't mention being his partner/husband, and he was about to comment on this but before he could get a word out. Harry spoke again.
"So when do we tell them?"
**********
Next : Ron and Harry breaks the news, what would people's reaction be?
Huge Shout Outs:
Sarah the Green Witch : Woo-hoo, I've got a beta, I've got a beta **runs around the room waving hands and dancing like an idiot). Thank you kindly for your help, I really needed it, since this is my first foray in this endeavor, I would need all the help that I can get.
MiniMe : I am having a great break, thank you kindly for asking. But you're right, I'm not good at grammar, and verb tenses is a struggle. But you can be assured that I would take as much time as I can developing Ron and Harry's character as well as the others.
J() : I'm sorry if I go on and on about stuff, but I rest assured, I'd keep it to a minimum next time (and with Sarah's help I think that I would.).
Jivanna : Thank you for your kind words.
