A/N- thanks for the reviews guys! I luv my reviews ^_^ I'm trying to figure out how to end this soon, so stay tuned for more details!
I hope evry1 had a merry Xmas and will have a happy new year!
Disclaimer- this isn't for the series since everyone knows who that belongs to, someone else not me, but for a quote I put in that was in a terry pratchett book. The guys got an amazing way with words and the 'not snow, which is dead white…' quote was written by him, not me.
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'WHAT THE HELL IS THAT NOISE!!'
'Believe me, Zel, you don't want to know.'
'HURRY UP!'
'I AM!'
'NOT FAST ENOUGH! ARGH THEY'VE GOT ME! I'M MEEEELTINGGGG-'
'….Xelloss? That's the Wizard of Oz, and it's water that does that. Not bats.'
'Oh.'
'STOP YAKKING AND MOOOVE!'
'MOOOOVE?'
'MOOO-ve…hehehehe…'
'Oh shut up. What the hell was in that coffee?'
'How many times do I have to say this…..RUN YOU IDIOTS!'
Running feet, screams, twittering. Pop music blaring through the star-filled, rain-drop touched caves….screech.
'Oh crap.'
'Miss Lina?'
'What NOW?! Why've we stopped?'
'It's a dead end.' Everyone told her collectively staring that the blank wall. The black curtain of bats came screaming around the corner. Kai'ila and Casper, Cleo, Dynast fell to the floor with their hands covering their ears. Amelia stuffed her fingers in her ears while Lina kept on screaming for someone to do something. Xelloss had got pink fluffy earmuff on and was eating popcorn. Whether this was to block out the bats or Filia screaming at him is yet to be determined.
'SOMEONE DO SOMETHING!' yelled Lina. Zelgadis nodded and stepped in front of the group, held out his hands-
'Fireball.'
There was dead silence as the bats fried. Eventually a warped piece of plastic fell to the floor, and the only light they had faded. Xelloss took off his pink fluffy earmuffs. Filia stopped screeching. Amelia and everyone else took their hands of their ears at stared at the chimera, who was calmly brushing off his tunic. Val slapped his forehead.
'Oh for crying-' L'risia began, then trailed off, blinking at Zel. She groaned.
'I'm an idiot.'
'We're ALL idiots.' Kai'ila said, letting Casper help her up. Dynast gave his priest a very strange look.
'Zel-' began Lina. Zelgadis whirled around and stuck a hand up in the air, john-travolta style.
'Yes! I am BRILLIANT! I, the one and only Zelgadis Greywords triumph again in the name of justice and money!'
Somehow he had managed to remember Lina's exact speech from her most recent treasure obtainment, and the result was…L'risia put a hand over her mouth to try and stop from laughing outright, while her friends weren't so subtle, laughing on contact with the ground along with Xelloss. Casper wasn't much better. The others were trying to restrain Lina from killing the chimera.
'T-t-that was good.' Gasped Cleo. Zel bowed.
'Thankyou, thankyou.'
'Fireball!'
Zel blinked and stepped out of the smouldering ground and smiled wryly at Lina, who was glowering famously. He opened his mouth to say something, but decided against it. Meanwhile, the priestesses had stopped laughing and had their ears up against the wall.
'Uh- Miss Kai'ila, what are you-'
'Ssh!'
'Um-'
'SHUT UP!'
'Sorry…'
There was more dead silence. After a while Lina pressed her ear up against the wall. Her eyes widened.
'Birds!' she whispered. The rest of the group hit the wall with their ears against it like nails to a magnet.
'Everyone stand BACK.' Lina ordered. They did, in most cases finding something relatively solid to hide behind, being familiar with Lina's techniques of removing obstacles. Cleo turned to Xelloss.
'By the way, where did you get those pink earmuffs?'
'Hm? Oh a little shop up on the mountains.'
'VIBRATION BLAST!'
'Ooh shit-'
Everyone ducked flying bits of rubble. Shields bloomed up like watching mushrooms grow in fast-forward. When the noise died away, Lina dived into the green field, under a corn-flower blue sky and rolled through the daisies.
'FRESH AIR! Breeze! Flowers! Grass! No annoying computer-thing geniuses!'
'No bats.'
'That as well.'
A few hours later….
'Soooo.'
'Yes.'
'Well.'
'Um.'
'What do we do now?'
'I have no bloody idea. Do you think we can teleport now? Only I've missed- oh, about a days worth of the DBZ marathon.'
'A DAY?! Just how long does it go on for?!'
'About five.'
'What?!'
'Well it's a slow series…. L'ri, what are you doing?'
'I'm making a daisy chain,' said priestess said calmly from where she was hovering about a metre off the ground.
'Do you have a phobia about having you butt on the ground or something?' Zelgadis asked, bothering to open an eye to stare at her. She grinned.
'Could have. I like floating.'
'You know what the stupid thing is, Zel?' Cleo said as L'risia tossed the chain on Amelia's head and shouted out, "SCORE!" Xelloss began making a daisy chain.
'What?'
'She's afraid of heights.'
Lina had been watching this show and at the same time griping endlessly about having spent days in the STUPID caves with the STUPID bats and not finding ANY STUPID treasure. Suddenly she stopped. Startled by the absence of noise, everyone looked at her. She jerked, blood trickling gout of the corner of her mouth. Gourry's eye travelled to the long white and bloody horn protruding from her stomach.
'LINA!'
'Oh my God-'
'Lina-san!'
The horn withdrew, and a shimmering white head rose from above Lina's crippled form. Cleo drew in a sharp breath.
'It's a unicorn-'
It was magnificent, a full-grown stallion with a white coat. Not white as snow, which is dead white, but white as milk, which is alive. Shimmering colours rippled across the surface and reflecting the colours of light like so many distant stars thrown on the surface. Lina's blood stained the foot-long, spiral horn on its forehead, and trickled down to stain the face of the unicorn. Its eyes were red.
'Why're its eyes red?' Kai'ila managed. L'risia spun around and looked piercingly at Dynast. He was laughing. Laughing and laughing as if the funniest thing in the world was the redhead getting run through. His eyes held a dull red glow.
'You-you- bastard!' she screamed, and flung out a hand. The dark Lord smashed into a tree.
'Uh- L'ri-'
'It's him! He's in its mind!'
Dynast brushed himself off and waggled a finger at the furious priestess, and Zelgadis who was reaching for his sword. Xelloss's eyes opened and narrowed.
'Now now. Play fair.' He smiled, and snarled at Casper. 'You- you are rebelling, I can sense it- if that's the way you want it.'
Casper's eyes widened and then he groaned, falling to the ground hands on his head.
'What's he doing?' Amelia asked, her face pale as Ka9i'ila knelt beside the buckled form.
'Breaking all bonds. Casper will be lucky to survive.'
'I should have killed him YEARS ago.' Raged L'risia, kicking a tree so hard it fell down.
'L'risia, calm down.' Cleo soothed, 'we have to sort out the unicorn, Gourry's trying to kill it.'
Zel and Filia were barely restraining Gourry, who was trying to kill the maddened unicorn.
'How do we STOP it- oh NO it's fucking charging-' Kai'ila groaned. 'ZEL A SHEILD DO IT NOW!'
The chimera threw up a shield, and the unicorn hit it. L'risia scrambled over, rolling up the sleeve on her shirt.
'Hold Gourry.' She snapped, nerves wound up so tight you could have played a tune on them. Filia blinked as the girl thrust out a hand palm first, snapping Gourry's head back. He slumped, unconscious.
'O-kaaay.' Zelgadis said.
'How do you stop a – yike! Unicorn?' Filia yelped, jumping out of the way.
'Really Filia.' Xelloss grinned down at her. She'd jumped into his arms. Filia blinked and blushed.
'EEEk!'
'That was your own fault.' Said Cleo distractedly.
'We need a cage and something to hold the stupid thing with….' L'risia muttered.
'Huh?' Amelia asked.
'Amelia look after Lina and see what you can do, that stomach wound won't have killed her instantly. Casper cannot be helped much- try a sleep spell or something.' Snapped L'risia. Her friends looked at her in some surprise.
'She really doesn't like Dynast does she?' Val observed from where he was hovering in the air.
'No.'
'Why?'
'L'risia has this weird habit of hating people just because.'
'Who's got the longest hair? Filia.' L'risia was thinking aloud. 'Val get down here!'
'Ooh-' Cleo said, getting the plan as L'risia directed the group to stand around the unicorn, deflecting its strikes with shields.
'Why don't we just kill it?' Xelloss asked, grabbing the horn and throwing the unicorn backwards. It screamed, hoofs failing at the air in a mad rage.
'You don't kill unicorns.' Snapped the priestesses at once.
'Well what do we do?!' Zelgadis asked, and glanced around at Amelia, still knelt over Lina's body.
'Very simple. Filia, you're a virgin right?' Kai'ila asked. Filia went red.
'W-what? Yes, of course!' she stammered.
L'risia quietly told her what to do, as Cleo and Kai'ila instructed Val, Xelloss, and Zel on creating a cage from their shields.
'All right.' Cleo said grimly, deflecting a strike from the unicorn.
'Lets do this.'
