I'm writing this in the xmen universe, this is in memory of a dear friend,
who was like a mother to me, Susan. She died May 14, 2000.
"You can't be serious." I looked at the doctor in the eyes, "let me see that." I grabbed the film and held it up to the light, he wasn't lying. "What do I have to do" the doctor started to explain, "first we will do a biopsy, this isn't for sure yet, don't get freaked. If it is there, we will schedule a mastectomy, remove the cancer, and you will stay in the hospital for about 48 hours, depending on how you are doing. Then we will do chemotherapy, if you want after about 6 months, we can put an implant in, so you will have something there." A tear fell onto the film, it was clear that there was cancer in my left breast.
I went home with my new, morbid, knowledge. Scott wasn't home yet, so I went and sat in the medical lab staring at the chrome polished counters and marble tiles. I felt so old. Only old women got breast cancer. I was only 28; I had 12 years before I was 40, that's when you got cancer, not 28. My life was over, I was going to die, and leave Scott alone. I couldn't believe this, me, of all people. Jean the athletic girl at school who looked after her body. I got up off the floor and grabbed the phone.
"Mom? Daddy, let me talk to mom." I heard some yelling coming from the other end.
"Hi Jean." I heard a woman's voice on the other end, "mom, I." I started to cry, "I have breast cancer." I heard a broken connection and I hug up the phone. I got up and went upstairs.
Scott was laughing about something with some of the students. He saw me cry and walked over, "jean, what's wrong honey? Did something happen?" I didn't talk I just hugged him. "Jean? What's wrong?" he kept repeating to me. I was still silent. He whispered into my ear this time, "what's wrong?" I looked up and him and wiped my face from the tears, "I. I have. breast cancer." Scott hugged me tight that time and I did the same. "I'm sorry." I said to him, "don't be, will take care of this, nothing will happen and you'll be ok." I said to me. I felt a tear drop onto my bare soldier, he was crying, Scott never cried. Now I knew we had to get through this, there was no other way.
"You can't be serious." I looked at the doctor in the eyes, "let me see that." I grabbed the film and held it up to the light, he wasn't lying. "What do I have to do" the doctor started to explain, "first we will do a biopsy, this isn't for sure yet, don't get freaked. If it is there, we will schedule a mastectomy, remove the cancer, and you will stay in the hospital for about 48 hours, depending on how you are doing. Then we will do chemotherapy, if you want after about 6 months, we can put an implant in, so you will have something there." A tear fell onto the film, it was clear that there was cancer in my left breast.
I went home with my new, morbid, knowledge. Scott wasn't home yet, so I went and sat in the medical lab staring at the chrome polished counters and marble tiles. I felt so old. Only old women got breast cancer. I was only 28; I had 12 years before I was 40, that's when you got cancer, not 28. My life was over, I was going to die, and leave Scott alone. I couldn't believe this, me, of all people. Jean the athletic girl at school who looked after her body. I got up off the floor and grabbed the phone.
"Mom? Daddy, let me talk to mom." I heard some yelling coming from the other end.
"Hi Jean." I heard a woman's voice on the other end, "mom, I." I started to cry, "I have breast cancer." I heard a broken connection and I hug up the phone. I got up and went upstairs.
Scott was laughing about something with some of the students. He saw me cry and walked over, "jean, what's wrong honey? Did something happen?" I didn't talk I just hugged him. "Jean? What's wrong?" he kept repeating to me. I was still silent. He whispered into my ear this time, "what's wrong?" I looked up and him and wiped my face from the tears, "I. I have. breast cancer." Scott hugged me tight that time and I did the same. "I'm sorry." I said to him, "don't be, will take care of this, nothing will happen and you'll be ok." I said to me. I felt a tear drop onto my bare soldier, he was crying, Scott never cried. Now I knew we had to get through this, there was no other way.
