Chapter 11: One last time
Zack set out from his apartment just before dawn, although he'd been awake for hours. In his hand was a beaten-up bag, for taking back his few possessions. He stopped on Tifa's doorstep to recall the words he planned to say. That is, if she hadn't already left.
/We're through!
/When you come back this time-- If you come back this time-- I won't be here.
/You _know_ I love you... If you ever need anything... you can always...
He yanked the door open.
His eyes soon fixed on the woman slumped against a table, her head on her arms. Dirty glasses and overturned chairs were everywhere; she hadn't spent the night cleaning. Had she spent the night like that?
He stood awkwardly, not sure whether he should just... shout his declaration at her from there, or risk coming closer. Then he saw her shoulders shake. She was sobbing.
/I don't care.
/I can't...
But almost without the involvement of his brain, his feet had carried him to her. His arms held her, his hands wiped away her tears.
Summoning all his resolve, Zack managed to pull away. When he felt in control again, he made his announcement. But the words had lodged in his throat.
/Damn it, why can't I just say it?
Then his train of thought screeched to a stop. She'd leaned closer; she'd taken both of his hands in hers. When he reluctantly looked into her teary eyes, she spoke.
"I'm sorry I hurt you...when I left before. But...this time...," she paused, not trusting her voice, "I'm not going with him."
"..."
His eyes grew wide. Even his breathing stilled for a moment.
"I won't leave again-- unless you... want me to." Her eyes darted to the duffle bag by his feet for a moment, before meeting his eyes again.
"I don't want you to go! I never wanted you to! " He erupted at her. "But... you always leave... for him..." his voice fell despondently.
She drew back a little, seemingly in recoil from his fury, and his chest tightened. Before he could succumb to the incongruous urge to comfort her, however, she'd bitten her lip resolutely and looked up again.
"What I've... screwed up...," her voice broke, "I... I can't undo the past." She hung her head for a moment, before looking up at him with desperate, pleading brown eyes. "But... I love you, and I want to try to..."
If she said any more than that, he didn't hear. His consciousness had trembled. Quaked. Some time after that, he felt her hands on his face, slowly, gently guiding him to meet her gaze.
"I love you, Zack," she spoke with aching clarity.
He stared, still reeling from her words. ".... But...Cloud...," he stammered, when his voice finally returned.
"Cloud is going with Cid. He'll be okay..." She smiled, and he nearly smiled too.
"But... you were crying...," he continued, still a little confused.
"I was scared that... you weren't coming back. I thought... you might... leave me..." She looked down hurriedly, her voice choked with shame and anguish.
For a fleeting second, she glanced up at him, and he caught her rueful smile as fresh tears stained her face.
"Tifa..." His heart constricted sharply as he pulled her into his arms. He was so desperate to ease her pain that he would've lied about his intention for coming there that day. But the desert in his mouth had smothered his lies.
"And... you'd have every right to...." she stunned him by continuing.
"... but... if you could... give me one more chance... to show you how much I love you... to show you I'm serious about us..." Her eyes were bright and resolute when she looked up, straining to catch his gaze, although they still seeped delicate tracks down her cheeks.
He brought trembling hands up to delicately cup her face, his eyes stinging, his control vanquished by her naked, dizzying love.
"I love you, Tifa," he swallowed hard, "... and... as long as you love me... this is where I'm gonna be..."
"I was... scared... of losing you... I... can't go through that again..."
"But... if you really love me..." His voice suddenly faltered-- she'd brought her caressing palm against his cheek.
"I do." Her response was urgent. Immediate.
"Then... stay with me," he pleaded.
"I won't leave again. I promise," she stepped a bit closer, placing his hand on her heart as she spoke.
"Really? You promise?" His voice was childlike, wondering, as if he thought her love was a dream that might shatter, if he dared reach out and touch it.
"I promise," she softly repeated her pledge. Her guileless caramel eyes were shining, letting him plumb the depths of her heart.
He stared for a moment, entranced. Then his heart soared, elated, and he flashed a grin at her.
"Good, cause if you leave, I'll follow you to the ends of the planet, you know... and... there'll be hell to pay..." He cocked one eyebrow and did his best to look threatening.
"I won't leave you. I love you so much..." She buried her face in his chest, and proceeded to show him how much.
FIN
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A/N
I wouldn't have made it through the rehabilitation of this old fic without Ani K. and Rokusan. It's not enough for me to say this, but... thank you so much, for your friendship, c&c, everything.
I also want to thank Sydney Kyle, for inspiring me to start writing fanfics, and GlassShard, for posting this on her site way back in 1999. ^_^
