Disclaimers: I don't own GW or its characters (licensed by Bandai Entertainment and owned by Sunrise, Sotsu Agency, etc, etc). Song is from unknown source, heard it on a tv show and thought it appropriate. No money made, etc. yadda, yadda…
Warnings: R rating, 2+4; 1X2X1(implied), ?X4(guess) Light Lime, angst, sap (from the Christmas tree most likely), Yaoi, language, violence, Multi-part.
I took some liberties with the boys' ages making Quatre a little younger and with the characters, somewhat OOC
This is my first Gundam Wing fic….doesn't follow canon faithfully so consider it a parallel universe (not AU) or whatever you like….
CHRISTMAS STAR
By Katreve
Part III
The two mercenaries slowly walked along some way behind the blonde boy.
One of them asked his companion, "Are you sure just the two of this can pull us off? We won't need any more help?"
"He's a school boy…what do you think? And he's not that big for his age. More guys would have meant a smaller split on the ransom. Why do that?"
"All right, but what if he calls out and someone hears him.?"
"We've been over this," Gastoff sighed in frustration. He wondered why he had chosen Fruhen to help him in the kidnapping, except he was dumber than a post and Gastoff thought he could probably off him and keep all the ransom for himself. He continued, running through the plan again, "Just let's follow him. He's bound to cross one of those back alleys and we'll move up behind him, shove him inside it and use the chloroform. He'll never have a chance to cry out. He'll probably be scared shitless. All the back alleys lead to the rear of the village. We just have to move quickly. Keep that blanket in the shopping bag ready to wrap him in. It should just look like your carrying it over your shoulder and no one the wiser that we have the boy's body in it."
But the remaining morning hours never afforded the kidnappers the opportunity they sought. There were quite a few people milling about the village, shopping and stopping to talk and laugh with friends and neighbors. Also the sun was very bright and reflected off the snow, lighting even the back alleys.
In the afternoon, after watching the boys gather for lunch and then split up again, the kidnapper called Fruhen said, "We're not going to be able to pull this off. Maybe we should just break into the lodge tonight and take him. With our guns against an old couple and a few schoolboys, it should be simple, ne?"
"Be patient." Gastoff replied, "I had not accounted for how bright the sun would be off the snow in the morning. But this afternoon clouds are beginning to gather and it's getting darker as the sun moves west toward the mountains. Also as it gets a little colder, some of these people will get off the streets."
"And if he and his companions decide to do the same?"
"Then we may have to change our plans and raid the lodge. But I did not want to let that many people see us grab him even if we wear ski masks and tie them up."
"We could just kill the others." Fruhen suggested.
"Bah, you're a fool. Never kill unless you have something to gain without putting your own life on the line. If we kill them, we'll have even more cops after us. The Berensons are well known and loved, and half the town would be after us not even waiting for the police. I don't want a vigilante mob looking for us." Gastoff stopped, then continued, "Look there he goes. He's heading for that shop at the end of town. This may be perfect and it's getting more clouded over by the minute. Come on. I'll have the chloroform ready so he won't have a chance to yell. You get ready to throw the blanket around him after he's out."
+++
Further down the street, Quatre ran into Duo who was just leaving the gift shop. Duo clutched his packages closer and said, "Don't look….pass me by like you don't know me," but then stopped noting the worried frown on Quatre's face.
"What is it, Quat-chan?" asked Duo.
Quatre shifted his own packages and bags and said while looking around slowly, "I don't know, but I feel like I'm being watched."
Duo looked around too but acted as if he was just looking at the shops and people.
"Well, do you have any idea who or what?"
Quatre shook his head, "Once or twice I thought I saw two men following me, but when I tried to watch more closely, I realized they're just two people shopping like us. They have a large shopping bag and the village is not that big, so it would not be surprising to see the same people more than once."
"But?" Duo waited.
"I guess I'm just being paranoid. But I feel a little uneasy."
"Alright, I, for one, trust your instincts, no matter what the scientists may think. You think we should call it a day?"
"Maybe, but I do need to get one more thing in this shop and then I'll meet you back at the village square, say in 15 minutes. And I'll keep my eyes open. But I want to believe it's not true. This place, the lodge, our Christmas is perfect. Maybe I just won't let myself think everything could be so wonderful, better than you even told me. You know sometimes I can be too gloomy…"
"You Quat-chan…not really. You blame yourself when you shouldn't for things that are not your fault, and maybe you're a little sensitive to the rest of us…but you're basically a cheerful guy. You'd have to be in order to be my friend, ne? Or my brother? 'cause brothers are alike in some things…"
"Duo…" and Quatre shook his head as he laughed lightly. "I'll just run in here and meet you in 15 minutes. We can have tea or hot cocoa at the coffee shoppe where we had lunch while we wait for the others."
Duo nodded, "Great, I'm done anyway and I see Heero and Trowa going into village inn coffee shoppe now. I'll head over there and tell them we'll be with them in 15 minutes or so."
Quatre nodded and walked away from Duo and entered the small shop at the end of the street.
Duo walked back up the street and glanced back to see if he noticed anything. All he saw were two older gentlemen walking toward the same shop Quatre had just entered. He turned back and slipped into the coffee shoppe. Seeing Heero and Trowa at a table near the window, he walked over, "Are you two finished for the day?" he asked.
"Hn…" but Heero nodded.
Trowa answered, "Yes, we're just waiting for the rest of you."
"Well," Duo continued, "I am going back outside to wait for Quatre in the village square. He has one more thing to buy and then he'll be along too." Duo was looking out the window but he could not see the shop from this vantage point and for some reason he was anxious to get back outside where he could see the shop and its entrance.
"Why not wait here, then?" asked Trowa, "It's getting colder now that the sun is going behind the clouds.
Duo shook his head, "Quatre is feeling uneasy about something. He says he feels like someone is watching him, so I'm going back out to the village square because that's what we agreed upon and I can see the shop he went into from there."
Duo started to move away but Heero stood also and followed him. He waved Trowa to sit back down but waited to speak to Duo until the two were out the door and crossing the cobblestone street to the village square.
"What's this about Quatre?"
"Just what I said, Heero. I don't know anything else. There's the shop he went into," Duo pointed to the far end of the small town to the little shop there, "I can see it from here and will just watch for him."
Heero stood without saying anything for a moment and then nodded, "Hn…." And started back into coffee shoppe. He noticed Wufei coming from the other direction and waited for him at the inn's door.
Duo saw Quatre leave the shop and grinned to himself. Quatre was even more loaded down with packages and bags now. If he had only bought one thing in that shop, it must have been big. Or possibly he picked up more than just "one" gift.
Duo heard Heero hail him and he looked over to where he and Wufei were standing at the coffee shoppe's door. "We're all done with our shopping once Quatre gets here," Heero said.
"He's on his way…" answered Duo and then he heard a cry that chilled him to the bone.
"DUO……"
Duo's head snapped back around. Quatre was no longer in sight, but he had recognized his call and it was a cry for help. He saw some packages and bags scattered at the entrance of a small alleyway between the shop and the tall building next to it….
He started running and called out himself, "Heero…."
But Heero had heard Quatre's cry for Duo at the same time Duo did. Heero moved instinctively, snapping out to Wufei, "Get Trowa and move." He was running after Duo, only a matter of feet behind him.
Heero's trained responses and instincts quickly put together the information he had received within the last few minutes as well as what he already knew about the Arab pilot,
//Quatre had been uneasy and felt as if he was being watched.
Duo was edgy too, trusting Quatre's instincts, but seeing no evidence of any danger.
Quatre was the Winner Heir and a therefore a target for kidnapping or assassination.
Quatre was a Gundam Pilot and also a target for assassination or capture.
Something was going down now….and…//
…and ….Heero was more frightened than he had any right to be and it was not for himself. It would never have been for himself. Perhaps he felt some concern over the other Gundam pilots as team members and effective weapons in their Gundams. But this feeling of fear for Quatre was different…it was new…and it disturbed him that he should feel this strongly about anything or anyone. And just when had this happened to him….that he even cared this much?
All these thoughts flew through his mind in seconds and he started cursing himself for starting to care for a certain blonde Arab Gundam pilot who should have never been one in the first place and who had the nerve to somehow touch his stone heart and find a way in.
+++
Wufei did not know about Quatre or his disquiet, or what Duo and Heero knew from their conversations. But he too heard Quatre's call, identified his voice and reacted just as sharply as Heero. In seconds he was inside the coffee shoppe. He spoke two words to Trowa who rose at the sight of Wufei's expression. Trowa knew that look, Wufei was preparing for battle and then he heard the two words that told him more than he wanted to know…
"It's Quatre."
The two pilots left the restaurant quickly but they were strangely silent as they moved, almost as if they were shadows slipping swiftly out into the street.
+++
Duo reached the entrance to the dark alleyway and saw just a flash of color turning a corner at the far end. He did not slow his pace in the least and turned down the alley running full out. He knew Heero was on his heels…
The two Gundam pilots reached the far end of the alley and turned at the sound of an all terrain vehicle starting up down the snowy, muddy back street that turned off the alley. It was pulling away too fast for them to catch it at the distance they were from it.
Heero's gun was out and he sighted quickly and fired. The vehicle swerved, fish-tailed and then swung completely around, it's back tire shot out. Heero fired again at the upper corner of the driver's wind screen…it was a warning. He did not want to kill the driver and possibly cause a dangerous accident. Without a doubt, Quatre was in that vehicle and under restraint or worse. The vehicle stopped moving.
He and Duo were running again. Duo had his gun out but had not fired it, letting Heero handle the shooting. His eyes were scanning for pale gold hair….but he could not find any sign. Still, like Heero, he knew Quatre was a prisoner in that vehicle.
Wufei and Trowa were not far behind Heero and Duo now. While they had stopped and Heero had fired at the vehicle, the two other pilots has gained ground on them.
As Heero and Duo approached the vehicle they both had their guns up and held in both hands pointing inside…
Duo called out his voice dealing death in it's very tone, "We don't know who the hell you are, but you had better come out and bring that boy you grabbed with you…now move and do it very carefully…."
The driver of the vehicle put his hands out first and then raised them as he stepped out.
Heero motioned him with his gun to step away from the jeep.
Then a voice came from inside of the vehicle, "I'm coming out, but I have the Winner boy, and I'll shoot him if you don't back off."
Trowa and Wufei were now on each side of Duo and Heero. Their guns too were trained on the vehicle, waiting for the other kidnapper to come out.
"We're waiting….." Duo's voice was cold as death still.
The second man moved slowly out of the vehicle, but he had a blanket-wrapped figure clutched in front of him. He shoved the top of the blanket down enough and Duo finally saw what he had been looking for, gold hair…on a head that hung limply. The man gripped one arm along Quatre's collar bone right below his neck. The other hand held a gun to Quatre's temple.
"I don't know who you people are, but you are no schoolboys as you seemed to be. You must be this one's bodyguards. But I have him, and unless you let me leave, I'll kill him here and now and you will…." The man's foot caught on the trailing blanket and he tripped just a bit but it was just enough of a distraction.
Four gun shots rang out almost simultaneously. The man's forehead exploded from four bullets that entered just between his eyes and he fell back, dragging his hostage with him.
The other kidnapper started to run. Wufei, who stood next to Heero, let his gun track him and then dropped him with one shot. The man stumbled forward and fell in the snow.
Duo and Heero were already moving to the fallen man and Quatre. Duo was almost surprised that Heero was a step ahead of him. Heero reached for Quatre and pulled him from the dead kidnapper's slack grip. He cursed at the blood from the man's wounds that had spattered on Quatre's hair and head. Duo pulled up a corner of the blanket and dipped it in some clean snow at the edge of the road. He then wiped Quatre's face and hair while Heero disentangled him completely from rest of the encompassing material. Once he was free and Duo had cleaned the blood from the Arabian boy, Duo checked him quickly for injuries. He found two cracked ribs, and there was swelling in one wrist and one ankle though they did not seem to be broken. He could also smell a faint odor of chloroform.
Trowa and Wufei returned from checking the second kidnapper and stayed close watching as Duo and Heero took care of Quatre.
The town's local constables were there suddenly and Duo stood to explain what had happened. He used their aliases, explaining that 'Michael Raberba' was a wealthy young man and these kidnappers had apparently been seeking to take him captive in order to collect ransom. It was easy enough to explain that they four were his bodyguards and he used their aliases also, Daniel Mason; Trini Barrow; Harry Yukawa and Chuang-tzu. At least their names matched their nationalities and they had papers to back them up.
The constables wanted to take Quatre to a small medical clinic nearby, but Heero who had carefully picked him up and was carrying him now, refused saying they felt they could protect him better themselves and would return with him to the Berensons' lodge where they were staying. The constable in charge looked doubtful but Heero merely began to walk away and Duo smoothed it over by saying they would appreciate it if a doctor would come out to the lodge for a look at their "employer".
The constable writing the report was muttering something about how young they were to be bodyguards, but Duo seeing the others had moved off, said they could reach them at the lodge for further questioning if necessary, then hurried to catch up. He rounded the corner back on the main street of the village and saw Wufei and Trowa gathering up Quatre's bundles and bags.
Duo hurried after Heero who was far ahead now, almost to their own jeeps.
+++
A few hours later, Duo watched Heero as he paced. Wufei and Trowa had followed in the second jeep ….but Heero had insisted Duo drive the first one and would not release Quatre to him. Duo had thought he had seen something in Heero those few nights ago, when it was first discussed that Quatre was to be dismissed from the Gundam pilots. Though that night Heero had been telling of Quatre's shortcomings in his regular expressionless voice and even to all intents and purposes apparently agreeing with the scientists' plans, later when he had knocked on Quatre's door and came in while Duo was with him…he had struggled with words and feelings. Now Duo saw that Heero's feelings were coming to the fore even further. He was worried about Quatre. More than he had ever worried about any of them, at least to Duo's knowledge. The Perfect Soldier who prided himself on controlling his emotions, was revealing that he actually had feelings tonight and did not seem to care that he was doing so.
Duo was concerned also for his friend, but he knew Quatre's injuries were not life threatening and for that he was thankful. But Heero was upset….more upset that he had any right to be…unless…
Duo glanced over at Trowa and Wufei. They too had revealed that they cared for the Arab pilot this day. Wufei, who had seemed to often be scornful of Quatre and what he considered his weakness. And Trowa, who Duo knew was fond of Quatre anyway, was worried too. His usual stoic mask was gone and his face reflected his concern.
But none as much as Heero.
The doctor was coming down the stairs, they all looked up expectantly.
"Well, your friend has two cracked ribs, some bruises and scrapes, a sprained wrist, and a sprained ankle. Also he seems to have been rendered unconscious with chloroform. But apparently his kidnappers had a hell of a time attempting to use it. They had a brawl with him before they were able to take him down. He must be a real little fighter."
Duo smiled, "That he is. I thought I noticed bruises and cuts on the kidnappers."
The doctor raised an eyebrow, "Well I understand both of the kidnappers are dead. You boys seems quite young but you must be very efficient bodyguards. Now as far as my patient is concerned, he will recover with rest and quiet. I had thought to take him in to the clinic for observation but he has refused to go."
"He's awake?" Trowa almost smiled.
"Well he was for a bit. But he's drifted off to sleep again, after I all but forced him to take something for the pain. Whoever checks on him during the night should be sure his breathing is not too labored because of his ribs and keep track of his temperature too. I will be back tomorrow evening to check on him myself. Remember rest and quiet."
Duo was still smiling, "Thank you Doctor. We will keep a close eye on him and will be happy for you to come back and check on him tomorrow. But since tomorrow is Christmas Eve you should come by earlier, I am sure you want to be home with your family tomorrow night."
The doctor smiled back at Duo, "Yes and thank you. Then I will be by about two o'clock in the afternoon."
The doctor moved to speak to the Berensons who stood near the door and Duo turned back to go upstairs to see Quatre.
Trowa and Wufei were still in the room on the sofa but Heero was gone. Trowa caught Duo's eye and used his thumb to point up the stairs. Wufei just raised one eyebrow at Duo.
Duo grinned and took the stairs two at a time. He stopped at the closed door of Quatre's room and gently and silently opened it to look in…..
And you don't knowHow beautiful you are
If your eyes could see The Love that's in your heart
Then you would know
What everybody seesThat beautiful is all that you could be
Heero pulled up a chair next to the sleeping pilot's bed and settled down to watch him. The clouds had cleared from the sky and the moon had just risen outside. A soft night light filtered out from the bathroom. Asleep, head turned slightly toward Heero, Quatre looked in some way unreal. Otherworldly and far too vulnerable for Heero's liking. He seemed delicate but had proven to be much stronger physically that one would have thought. His features were boyish and yet refined in some way, the slim fingers of one hand resting on the coverlet over his chest, those fingers that could coax such beautiful music from a piano or a violin. Those gentle hands that had on more than one occasion bandaged some of the more serious wounds that any of the pilots had suffered. He would never take no for an answer when Heero growled at him to leave it, he would just laugh slightly and tell Heero to behave, that no one would think he was any less the perfect solider for having his wounds tended to. Quatre's pale hair fairly glowed in the soft moonlight. One of them, was it Duo or Trowa, certainly not Wufei, no it was Duo…Duo had said he was an angel one time which had caused Quatre to blush and Duo to tease him even more. How had this gentle, almost ethereal creature ever become a pilot, a warrior fighting missions to the best of his ability whenever called? Such a creature should never come anywhere near war or its miseries.
Heero found himself talking to Quatre, speaking softly, not really wanting the young Arabian pilot to hear and yet he felt compelled to say these things that were suddenly rushing through him, "I thought I had lost you…no, I mean we had lost you. And I don't know why I'm feeling this strongly about it. The scientists are wrong about you and I will tell them so. We are a team, and you're part of my team, I will keep my team together and safe to the best of my abilities. But when all this happened today, there was something else. I've never felt this way before about any body. Never wanted to. Maybe I think a lot of Duo, though he drives me crazy, and I admire Wufei, his single-mindedness, and Trowa is brave, one of the bravest people I've known. So what about you? You're an Arab prince or something, who cares? Money and influence, who cares? And you are definitely getting to be a pretty good Gundam pilot, though I've not really let you know that, but that matters. And I'm going to tell Dr. J that too. And you're a gentle person, not a 'gentleman' as is thrown around about the nobility. You are what they are supposed to be and even more. You really care about….care about me, don't you? Care about us all. And when did you get me caring so much about you? If we had lost you…..oh hell, if I had lost you…." Heero leaned over and very lightly brushed some of the blond bangs out of Quatre's eyes. His last words he now spoke again in an almost silent whisper "If I had lost you…."
Quatre took a deep breath and moved his head slightly. Heero froze, had Quatre possibly heard him? How would he explain it? Hell, he didn't know what it meant himself. He was bewildered by these new feelings, he was shocked to have feelings at all….except for that little girl and her dog….so long ago. Now Heero was realizing that not only did he sense something deep inside for Quatre but he felt a closeness to the other pilots. Perhaps Quatre had helped him realize that closeness to the others but when had he worked his way into his heart and soul so deeply?
A slight movement behind him took him by surprise but he immediately knew who it was. Duo pulled up another chair and sat down next to Heero. Had Duo heard what Heero had been saying just now for he certainly had been in the room for a few minutes. Heero should insist Duo go on to bed and that he would take first watch over Quatre, even though Duo had the right. He had always stuck by the boy, had always been loyal to him as a friend.
After a few more minutes of silence, Duo let out a soft sigh, "When did you realize you loved him?" he whispered. Heero stiffened and said nothing for some time. Duo went on, "I love him you know but in my way, I think more of him as a brother. And I know Trowa is fond of him. I'm not sure about Wufei, but I think after today, he is admitting to himself he thinks more of Quatre than he thought he did."
Heero had to say something, "I ….have decided that he is a part of our team after all. He's not a great soldier but he's important to us. He helps us to be a better team. I'm going to fight the scientists on taking him away for us. And as a team we should watch each other's backs. That's all we were doing today. I cannot become too personally involved because I cannot function as a soldier if I care too much about anyone. You and I, Duo, we've had a few times in bed, but we both know where it stops and where we have to focus on the war and nothing else."
Duo turned toward Heero and looked at him in the dim moonlight streaming through the open curtains. "Oh, is that all you're feeling? You've decided maybe he does contribute to our team and you were only taking care of a team member today, watching out for him as we all do for each other in battle?"
He looked back at the sleeping Quatre. "Alright, but you know what? Sometimes I look at this boy and realize I've never felt such honest feeling for me from anybody since I was young and Father Maxwell and Sister….well you know. If Quatre had not cared about me first, maybe I would not have come to know how I felt about him. But haven't you ever watched him smile and laugh? And pull us together when we're at each other's throats? And look concerned when Trowa starts to brood? Have you ever watched him play the violin with Trowa playing his flute and seen how Trowa relaxes? Have you seen him gently tease Wufei and even get him to smile, if just barely? Have you had him sit down next to you on the sofa when you're feeling terribly depressed and feel like throwing it all in, and then he just puts a hand on your shoulder and you know you don't have to say anything and he won't either, but he's just there for you? I say I am death, but if death had taken Quatre today, I ……I don't know how I would have handled it. He has shown me that there is more than death in this world. More than just fighting and the war. If death took him, then I think that rage might just overtake me totally. I would have continued fighting, I could do that easily enough. But I would be Shinigami absolutely then, no more caring, no more feelings. That's how I feel about him and I will not try to rationalize it or excuse it…it's just the way it is."
Duo stopped and sighed then went on, "Oh, and Heero, I've never heard you speak at length about anything except missions before tonight. Those words you spoke to Quatre were from your heart. A heart you refuse to admit even exists. If you love him, you should tell him. Sure, we are in a war, and any of us may be gone tomorrow. But to cut yourself off and never give love a chance when it comes along…."
Heero listened to all this and recognized the pictures of Quatre that Duo painted, the care Quatre always gently demonstrated to them all, and never asked for anything in return. Quatre expressed compassion for all of them that perhaps they had come to take for granted. Perhaps he, Heero, had even sneered at it. But he now realized that without Quatre, this group of misfits probably would have failed long ago. Quatre led them while Heero just told them what to do….there was a difference. And Heero was finally coming to realize something else about himself, he mulled it over trying to accept these feelings which he had refused to recognize until tonight.
After a long while, Heero heard himself speak, again words that he never thought he would be saying, "I don't want to be alone anymore, Duo. You are all my team, and I admit now that I care about you all, maybe you a little more for some reason. And I care for Quatre most of all, and I don't understand that exactly either. I guess we've all had darkness and grief in our lives and Quatre seems like he tries to relieve that in us, without even doing it intentionally or deliberately. It's just his nature, a nature that I had not really acknowledged before. But you know what, for all that, he seems so lonely and empty sometimes. It just hit me tonight. I don't want him to feel that way. I don't want to be alone and I don't want him to be alone. If that's love, then so be it. And right now, I….I just want to hold him."
"Then why don't you?" Trowa spoke from the shadows. Heero didn't even try to figure out when he had come in. Trowa moved forward, "If we wake him gently, we can help him sit up. You kick off your shoes and just get on the bed next to him. Let's see if Quatre would like to be held."
Heero wanted to protest and leave the room, but he didn't. He watched as Trowa bent over Quatre and put a hand on his shoulder. Gently he shook it and called Quatre's name very quietly. Quatre seemed to wake a little but was still very sleepy. "Quatre, can you hear me?" Trowa said in a low tone.
"Hmmm….yes, Trowa, are you alright?"
Trowa laughed softly, "Always thinking how I'm doing, ne? I'm fine and so is Duo. He's here too. We want to help you sit up a little more. You're propped up on some pillows so breathing is easier with your cracked ribs, but we think we can make you even more comfortable. Come on now, lets ease you up some…" Duo had gone to the other side of the bed and he and Trowa held Quatre's arms as they helped him sit up and forward.
Quatre seemed to be trying to open his eyes but he was just too tired. Once he was sitting up though, he said, "Well what are you two planning to do, hold me up like his all night, I must say….." his voice drifted off a little, then he seemed to get his train of thought back, "I must say this can't be comfortable for us all."
Trowa looked toward Heero and motioned with his head. Heero couldn't believe he was doing this, but he got up and moving next to Trowa he carefully sat on the bed next to Quatre. Duo and Trowa let Quatre lean back gently as Heero gathered him into his arms and slipped further onto the bed. Quatre was almost asleep again and nestled his head under Heero's chin. Heero let a tiny smile bend the corners of his lips as he put his hand up to comb his fingers through the soft blond hair for a moment.
Quatre's eyes suddenly snapped open, though Heero could not see them. "Heero?" he asked shakily, "What are you doing?"
"Holding on to you. Is that OK, Quatre?"
"I…I don't know."
Duo had sat back down and now Trowa sat in Heero's chair. Duo laughed lightly, "Well are you uncomfortable, having too much pain?"
"No….."
"Well go to sleep then, the doctor will shoot us if you don't get your rest."
Quatre looked confused, and Trowa added, "Heero decided he didn't like being alone and he thought you looked lonely too. He was really worried today, we all were. We just want to make you safe and warm….."
"And loved, and never alone, never again. And something else, angel, no way are the scientists taking you away from this team of Gundam Pilots." Heero whispered and rested his chin lightly on Quatre's head. "But if you are worried about the other thing Duo mentioned to me the other night, whether you are gay or bi-sexual or whatever, it does not matter at all, because you will be whatever you will be. Still, if you want me to move…."
"No…." Quatre spoke almost too quickly. "I don't understand exactly but don't let me go right now. I mean….." his voice was drifting off again and he settled more comfortably in Heero's arms. "This is awfully….warm and safe….like Trowa said."
When Heero felt the young pilot relax completely in his arms his smile broadened just a shade and he shifted to make himself more comfortable and then let out a huge yawn himself.
Wufei spoke from the dark doorway, "I think you are all a bunch of sentimental saps."
"Why Wufei, I do believe your voice cracked a little there," Duo smiled.
"You're crazy Maxwell. I'm tired and am going to bed. By the way, I headed off Mrs. Berenson and told her Quatre had three nursemaids so she did not have to feel she should check on the silly Arab. And Heero, I would have never believed it of you."
Heero spoke softly in that quiet, dangerous tone, "You have a problem with it?"
"No, it's none of my business I guess. Still I've never seen you smile like that before. It's scary."
"Wufei go to bed," said Duo.
"Yes," muttered Quatre, still half asleep. "You do sound like you're tired."
Wufei chuckled and from the faint light in the hallway, all but Quatre whose eyes were closed, could make out the dark form make a slight bow and then disappear.
Heero spoke to Duo and Trowa, "Will you two go to bed also? Those chairs are not that comfortable for getting some sleep."
"You planned to stay in one all night, didn't you?"
"Possibly, but I'm much more comfortable now. Please, Quatre would want you to…"
Duo nodded and rose, "Let's go Trowa. We'll close the door on the way out. Keep him safe, Heero."
As the door closed behind them, Heero whispered, "Always…." And he too started to drift off to sleep. Come to think of it, Heero realized, he himself felt pretty warm and safe too, and he did not remember when he had last felt that way.
+++
It was Christmas Eve. The snow had begun to fall lightly, dancing in little whirls around the corners of the lodge, when the doctor arrived to examine Quatre. He declared that the young Arabian was coming along fine.
After the doctor left, Duo shooed everyone out so that he and Quatre could wrap their presents together. Except for what they had gotten for each other, which Mrs. Berenson had volunteered to wrap.
Heero was feeling yet another new emotion, something like envy. He wanted to spend more time with Quatre, especially now that his feelings were out in the open. Heero knew Duo's feelings for Quatre were brotherly and he was glad Quatre had such a good and loyal friend. Still, damn it, he was jealous. Duo had been with Quatre since he had awakened that morning.
Mrs. Berenson got the other three pilots together in the big front hall and helped them wrap their presents. They were awkward at it, but managed. Trowa and Wufei even began to let their masks down and laugh at some of the ungainly packages that were placed under the tree. Mrs. Berenson made cookies and served them along with cocoa but Heero had had enough. He suddenly bolted up the stairs and knocked loudly on Quatre's door,
"Duo, you had better be done wrapping your gifts because I'm coming in."
He opened the door and saw Quatre sitting up, his good hand to his face as he stifled a giggle because it hurt his ribs to laugh. Duo was sitting at the foot of his bed with a large bow on his head.
Heero moved into the room and looked at the two pilots.
"Duo, get the packages you have wrapped downstairs. Quatre, you look well enough to come down. Mrs. Berenson has cocoa and cookies."
He walked over to the bed and looked at Duo who had not moved and was grinning up at him with those laughing Duo eyes.
Heero said, "Well move Maxwell, I'm getting Quatre up, putting his robe on and bringing him downstairs. Get your packages together and take them down. Make two trips if you have to, but get out of my way."
"Yes sir," Duo jumped off the bed and presented a snappy salute and then winked at Quatre. He picked up as many packages as he could and went out the door singing loudly, "DECK THE HALLS WITH BOUGHS OF HOLLY…FA LA LA LA LA LA LA…."
Heero smiled that new tiny smile of his and then as he looked over at Quatre, the smile softened,
"Quatre…."
Quatre returned his smile just a shade nervously. He had had a few bad dreams during the night, but Heero would wake him whispering he was safe, tell him to breath slowly and carefully because of his ribs, take his temperature and finally settle him back down to fall asleep again. In the morning, Heero was gone and Quatre had not seen him until now. Duo had been the one who helped him shower and change, who had eaten breakfast and later lunch with him and spent time with him wrapping packages.
Heero sat down on Quatre's bed and gently took his good hand between both of his. He looked at their hands, not raising his eyes to Quatre as he spoke,
"Do you remember me saying something about love last night…to you."
Quatre nodded, "I think so. But I wasn't sure it was not a dream. You are too focused on fighting and you, Heero, are the Perfect Soldier. Everyone says so. But Duo told me you said some pretty amazing things to me last night. I did not hear them word for word but for some reason I remember your voice speaking even while I was asleep. I do not understand it but I feel it….from you…."
"That's just it, angel, I don't understand it either but I do feel something very deep for you…I think I love you. And now that I've accepted it, I want you to belong to me….that is if you love me too. I know you care about me, you care about us all. And I know you really love Duo. And I also know about your fears about your ….sexual identity. It doesn't matter to me if you are not ready for an intimate relationship right now. Maybe you'll even decide you don't ever want that…huh….intimacy with me. But, I just want you to know I do love you and…..nothing is wrong with me loving you or your loving me. I just want to be as close to you as you will let me be."
Heero sighed a little and then grimaced slightly, "And I want to learn not to be jealous of anyone else touching you. Like Duo, I was jealous of his closeness to you today."
Heero suddenly shook his head, "Oh, Quatre, I'm not good with words at all…."
Duo's voice sounded as he came in the door, "I'm ba…ack. Just need to pick up the rest of these presents."
He did so but leaned over to whisper quickly in Heero's ear, "You ever, ever hurt him, Yuy, and you're dead." The Duo sashayed back out the door, pulling it closed with his foot since his hands were full of wrapped packages.
Heero almost grinned at Duo's death threat but then looked up into Quatre's eyes. While he had been talking he had been afraid to look at the boy, but he had still held his hand between both of his.
Quatre was smiling gently and his eyes were shining, "Heero, you say you are not good with words. But you're wrong. Now that you've started to say what you feel, your words are beautiful, like you are. And my heart knows you, Heero. It's funny that way. It knows the others too. But most especially it knows you. Would ….would you kiss me? I believe that I am ready for a kiss from one who my heart knows ….and loves."
Heero felt as if his own heart was going to burst with sudden intense happiness and he leaned forward and very gently and lovingly kissed the blonde angel. He felt Quatre smile after a moment and he pulled back.
Heero smiled too because he saw himself in those beautiful eyes. He stood up, pulled the blankets back and then moved to the closet to get Quatre's robe. Quatre leaned on his good hand and carefully moved to the edge of the bed. When Heero turned back and reached the bedside, he helped Quatre stand carefully not putting much weight on his bad ankle, leaning on Heero for support. Heero helped him get his robe on, pulled it around the boy and tied the sash. The he bent over and as Quatre placed one hand on his shoulder for support, he put on Quatre's slippers. Fortunately they were large enough to accommodate the wrapped ankle. The he stood up and quickly scooped the Arab pilot into his arms.
He kissed his cheek and said, "Since we kissed and it wasn't brotherly, though it was just this side of innocent, I am going to call you my koi, unless you object. And when the time is right and of course your injuries have to heal, when the time is right, when you are ready, will you let me truly make you my koibito."
"Yes, I will, Heero, and I would like to call you my koi too." Quatre whispered.
Heero laughed and snuggled a kiss into Quatre's neck, "You're an innocent angel, but you're a seductive one too. And you don't even know it yet. I love you, my angel."
Quatre sighed and tightened his arms around Heero's neck.
Heero carried his koi downstairs and sat him on the sofa, holding him close against him.
All the pilots had cookies and cocoa. Duo insisted on teaching them Christmas carols and holiday songs. As night came on and Duo went to light the tree, Heero felt Quatre relax completely against him.
Looking up at the brightly lit tree and the gaily wrapped packages and then down at the now sleeping angel, he smiled broadly. The tiny smiles had given way to new free, wide grins. He pulled his koi, if not in fact, in heart, closer in his arms and looked over at Duo.
Duo grinned back at him and said, "Well, this is a very special Christmas. I would like to thank you all for agreeing to help me celebrate it and I thank Quatre most of all. And though we have to wait until tomorrow to open our gifts, I am going to get sickeningly sentimental as Wufei hates, and say that you all have given me the best Christmas of my life. And, man, I love you all."
Duo said it all with a grin, but it was a sincere smile of gratitude and care for his friends.
Trowa raised his cup of cocoa, "To friendship and to Quatre who saw our need first and gave it to us,"
Everyone but Wufei and Quatre raised their cups. Quatre did not because he was asleep of course and Wufei hesitated for reasons only Wufei knew. Then as the others dropped their toast looking to Wufei because of his hesitation, he almost glared into Heero's eyes, "You're not the Perfect Soldier now, ne?"
Heero did not answer for a moment, then he replied, "When I fight, I will be the Perfect Soldier if that is what you want to call it, all that Dr. J has made me. And perhaps I will fight all the more fiercely for I understand now what it is to care, to love, and I never want to lose those feelings."
Wufei continued to eye the pair on the sofa. Then as Quatre shifted slightly and seemed to move even closer in Heero's embrace, Wufei noted the beautiful, peaceful look on the sleeping Arab's face. Wufei moved his eyes back to Heero. "And if you lose the one you love?" he asked, his voice almost sad now.
A look of pain flashed through those dark blue orbs and Heero seemed to gather his koi even closer.
"He will never lose the memory of love in his heart, ne, Heero?" Duo volunteered. "And besides, Quatre has proved today that he can fight very well when he must, and now I believe he will become one that we can follow, even in battle."
Heero nodded and moved to rest his chin on the blonde curls, "I would be a fool and a coward, Wufei, to give up this love because I might lose it. To never have loved him at all because of the war, I won't let the war do that to me. I can't let him go now that he's told me he loves me too. And as for fighting, we've all admitted that we're a closer now and I think we will be a better fighting team for it. I don't want to lose any of my team…most of all my angel."
Wufei took a deep breath and leaned back. He nodded then spoke, "To friendship then, an honorable emotion after all. And to love, Heero, I hope you never lose each other."
"Hear, Hear…" responded Duo.
They downed their cocoa as the toast.
Then Duo said with a grin, "To Christmas and to …..presents…"
Everyone laughed and drank another toast.
Then a quiet voice surprised them as Quatre lifted his head, moving it carefully from beneath Heero's chin, "And I have the best gift of all," Quatre said, "I have Heero…and he has my heart."
Heero looked down at his koi, then tilted his chin up for a soft kiss. Quatre responded with all the love in his being. When Heero moved back, Quatre smiled adorably and settled down against Heero once more, closing his eyes as he yawned slightly. He seemed to be falling back to sleep again.
"I take it the scientists are going to get a big surprise when you talk to them next, Heero," said Wufei.
Heero just smiled and kissed the golden hair of his koi.
Beautiful is all that you could be…"Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night…." Duo said softly.
OWARI
