Title: I Love You, Asuka (6)

Title: I Love You, Asuka (6)

Author: Yih

Written: ?, revised December 21, 2000

Edit Major: Worldmage

Dedication: To the following Reviewers: Yebisu Beer, Bassman, Skull_Leader, Purplecow, Ron, Yukiko, Anime ~~, and John-kun

Disclaimer: All rights are exclusively Gainax, except for the original scenes and phrases that the following characters use: Asuka, Misato, Pen-pen, and Shinji.

Part 6: Reconciliation

Misato's words slowly penetrated Shinji's half-confused brain. He sighed deeply as Misato asked worriedly, "Are you… going to go to her?"

His clear blue eyes startled her as he seemed to look into her very soul with strange intensity, "Does she really need me?"

She was momentarily taken back at his response, with a stare like that, she mused, I could never lie to him. She was thankful she could answer him truthfully, "You should go to her. She needs you."

He gave a ghost of a smile. "Thank you, Misato."

With another uncharacteristic Shinji move, he kissed her forehead softly before rising from his bed and straightening his shirt twice. The movements indicated what his body stance did not. He was nervous and unsure.

He left his room after carefully closing the door behind him, he wanted as much privacy as he could have. He knocked as quietly as humanly possible on Asuka's door. He cringed as Asuka screamed, "GO AWAY! HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU?"

He was still scared of her, but I love her. I really love her. I want to be with her no matter what, but she terrifies me.

He opened the door and dodged when she threw a heavy textbook at him. It missed him, barely. He glanced at her and saw her curled in the corner of the room, shaking. It caused an ache in his heart and any hesitation he felt dissolved. All he wanted to do was comfort her.

He prayed, let her, hear me out. Let me, be there for her.

Shinji knelt beside her. He wasn't prepared for her to say brokenly, "Shin- Shinji… I- Idon'thateyou."

He wrapped his arms around her and his bodily warmth seemed to comfort both of them. He whispered into her ear, admitting, "The dream-- you were right. It wasn't nothing. It was something."

He felt the tears choke up in his throat. She shifted to look him in the eye indicating that she wanted him to continue. He cleared his throat raggedly after a long second. "I think I felt… I felt incredible sadness. It was just anguish. And then- I don't know."

"I- I don't know why I said those things to you," she miserably confessed after the long silence that followed. Her teary eyes met his. "I don't believe you love me-- why do you have to love me?"

Of all the things she might have said, this wasn't what he had expected. All he could do was respond quietly, "I just do."

He smiled sadly as he blurt out, "You scare me."

He thought she'd laugh at the statement, but if he had known her state of mind, he wouldn't have said it. She didn't make a noise as a few more tears were shed down her face. He caught one with his finger as it trickled down her cheek. He tasted her tear and thought, salty.

Asuka was blanking out.

How can he say he loves me? She ironically rambled when the words caught up to her, when he says he's afraid of me? What a baka! She paused. Why do I feel like crying so much? In front of him, of all people. I hate needing people. I don't hate him. I hate needing him. But I do need him. Why? Why him?

She took in a deep breath, calming her shaking nerves. "You don't need to hold me, Shinji."

He regretfully released his hold on her.

"And I don't hate you," she finally concluded.

His heart gave a small leap.

"But—baka, it doesn't me you can jump me." She smiled through her tears.

Shinji grinned with laughter in his eyes, despite his recent sadness after the sad episode.

"I don't think you love me," she announced breezily.

His heart took a dive and he repeated his declaration to make sure she understood him, "I love you, Asuka. I love all of you."

She smiled sunnily.

His heart waited on a precipice.

"But— I don't need your love, baka. And I don't need you."

It fell.

I hope he doesn't take me too seriously, she reflected uncertainly. Because I do need him. He's my Shinji. My baka. I just don't want him… to think I need him.

She doesn't mean that, he tried to convince himself. I'll just have to do better. To make her see that my love for her is real. And that that's all I have sustaining me.

Pen-pen signaled to Misato with his flipper, all clear, the clouds have dissipated and the tornado warning is no longer in effect. But be cautious, a thunder storm may still hit the area by midnight.

Misato ignored the bird and guzzled down another beer. She threw one at Pen-pen, who popped it open with his beak and thanked her with a triumphant, "Wuargh! Wuaagh." [translation: Hallelujah! You read my mind, babe.]

She nodded at Pen-pen and raised her beer can, "Toast?"

Pen-pen responded and tried to lift up his beer can, "Wuargh!" [translation: Toast!]

"To you and me--may we live through their dating, their romance, their love, their wedding, their happiness with stable, sound minds…"

"Wuaagh! Wuagh…" [translation: You said it, babe! I hope so!]

Their beer cans went up and within mere seconds Misato and Pen-pen both burped simultaneously. They repeated the ritual again, this time toasting:

"To Shinji and Asuka, may they discover their love before they drive us to insanity…"

"Wuargh!" [translation: Yeah, right!]

Misato's last coherent toast was:

"To beer, my one true love!"

"WUARGH!" [translation: Now that's a toast!]

Author's Note: I am currently in the middle of Part 8. Part 7 is going through the drafting process and should be out by Sunday, no promises though because I have other obligations to other fanfictions and fact is: I enjoy writing what I want to write when I want to write it! Besides I'm trying to start Right Words again, should I try for a monthyly or bi-monthly rhythm with this one?

P.S. The more you review "thoughtfully" the more I want to write, ^_^.

Remember: Reviewing is Doing the Giving to Caring authors Slaving over Working on Writing fanfics!