Chapter Two: The Ball
Harry giggled nervously. He was going to a ball! He read over the invitation again, making sure he didn't miss anything.
Dear Mr. Pot,
We are pleased to inform you that you have been invited to Baldie, Sauron and Saruman's Ball of the Year. Remember, this is NOT an elaborate plan to kill you so don't bother being on guard. You can bring Mr. Weasel and Miss Grandma if you'd like.
- Lord Baldamort
Harry ran down the hall into his charms class room. He looked at the clock on the wall and realized it was ten minuets into class. "Sorry Professor Flipwhip!" Harry said, sitting down next to Ron and Hermione.
"It's okay Pot. It was that Malloy kid again, wasn't it?"
Harry thought quickly. "Yessir, he's quite annoying."
"Well, remind me to take fifty points from Slythery for that foul act of meaness," Flipwhip said. "Now, since Pot wasn't here for the first half of class, we'll award Gryffinwindow ten points."
Everyone cheered.
"Now lets start doing our Singing Charms. Mr. Soggybottum, would you start please? You can preform it the charm on the next Slythery to walk by the door. They all turned around n their seats so they could see the door. Just as Soggybottum got up, Draco Malloy passed by the door.
"Hey Malloy!" Neville Soggybottum called.
"Y-y-yes?" Draco Malloy slowly walked into the room.
"Singaringa BritneySpearso!" Neville cried.
Malloy twitched a little, then stated singing--
"Oh baby, baby
Oh baby, baby Oh baby, baby
How was I supposed to know
That something wasn't right here
Oh baby baby
I shouldn't have let you go
And now you're out of sight, yeah
Show me, how you want it to be
Tell me baby
'Cause I need to know now what we've go!"
Malloy was now dancing on Flipwhip's desk. The Gryffinwindows where laughing their heads off.
Malloy continued--
"Sometimes I run
Sometimes I hide
Sometimes I'm scared of you
But all I really want is to hold you tight
Treat you right, be with you day and night
Baby all I need is time....
...I'm not a girl
Not yet a womam
All I need is time
A moment that is mine
While I'm in between....
...I've got the urge
(i can i can)
I can wait another minute."
The Gryffinwindows where now laughing harder then ever. Malloy continued--
"I've got the urge to herbal (oh baby baby)
oh yeah yeah (oh yes)
I can wait another minute
I've got the urge to herbal
It's all so natural!"
Everyone clapped as Flipwhip murmerd the counter curse and shoved Malloy out of the room.
"He's got the urge!" Bean Thimas sang.
They where all laughing so hard FlipWhip dismissed the class.
Later that night, after Harry and Ron and Hermoine had second dinner, they all sat in the Common room singing the Herbal Essence song with the other Gryffinwindows.
Suddenly, Ron jumped up and shouted-- "I doesn'tith knowith what I shalt ware-ith!"
"Oh no!" The Gryffinwindows shouted.
So Harry, Ron and Hermione went to Abercrombie and Fitch in Pigslady to find Ron something to wear to the ball.
"How about this?" Hermione held up a shirt with pink flowers on it.
"Nah." Harry said. "Too girly."
"I've got it!" Ron said excitedly. He held up a lavender colored shirt with a rabbit on it.
"Perfect!" Harry exclaimed.
As they where exiting A&F, Hermione noticed something. A pig was flying!
"Cool!" Harry and Ron exclaimed.
"Oh no!" Hermione said. "Now I have to go out with that geek, Cedric Diggumup. I told him I'd go out with him when pigs fly."
The next night was the ball. As Harry, Ron and Hermione where gettin' down on the dance floor, Baldamort, Sauron and Saruman where sitting at their table gossiping.
"So I says to meself, I says, Sauron, (hiccup), that dang Bobbit ain't as tough as he says (hiccup), I says!" Sauron said loudly, downing another bottle of beer.
"Frodo's a Bobbit-Wobbit!" Baldie exclaimed.
Sauron and Saruman laughed loudly. "Bobbit-Wobbit! Hahahhahaaaa!"
Suddenly, the doors burst open and Lord Asriel walked in.
"Oy, Asriel!" Saruman yelled. "Over 'ere!" But Lord Asriel was already on the floor, dancing with Narcissa Malloy Saruman just shrugged and grabbed another beer.
Down on the floor, Harry was dancing his heart out. As Dirty Pop began to play, he decided it was time for a drink, so he went over to the punch table. He was two feet away from the table when he smacked into something. Confused, he looked down. Who should be standing there rubbing his nose but Frodo Haggins, the Bobbit!
"Hey, who you lookin' at?!" Frodo complained.
"I wouldn't be lookin' if you hadn't been in my way. Move it shorty!"
"Who you callin' short?!" Frodo glared at him.
Harry was enraged. Didn't that Bobbit know who he was? "Do you even know who I am?!" Harry yelled.
"Yeah," said Frodo. "The git who crashed into me!"
"Alright, that's it!" Harry attacked Frodo. Suddenly, the music switched from Dirty Pop to We Will Rock You. Everyone had retreated to the edge of the dance floor to watch the fight.
Harry pulled his wand out. Forgetting what it was for, he started hitting Frodo over the head with it. Frodo then pulled his ring out and started trying to stuff it up Harry's nose. Suddenly, the door burst open. Standing their with her hands on her hips, stood Lydia. She glared at Frodo and Harry. "Alright, which one of you has my precious?!"
"I ain't got it!" Frodo exclaimed, hiding the ring behind his back. Harry, who was a little slow on uptake was still beating Frodo over the head with his wand. With is other hand he grabbed the ring from behind Frodo's back . "Ah-hah!" He yelled triumphantly.
"Okay mister, hand it over!" Lydia grabbed the ring from Harry. "Time out for both of you!" She snapped her fingers and Dirty Pop came back on. She marched out of the room, clutching her Precious. Poor Harry and Frodo where sent to bed without their supper.
Coming soon to a computer near you...
What will happen to Baldie, Sauron and Saruman's plan? Did Ron drink to much punch? Will Harry and Frodo every get along? And more importantly, will Lydia be banned from eating sugar? Find out in the next chapter of Harry Pot meets Frodo!
