Finally! Sorry this took so long! Okay, I'm making a lot of this stuff in the chapter up. I dunno what the Pentagon looks like inside, and I'm aware they aren't doing tours anymore, but this is the IZ world people! Things are different there, so... just read it!


Six
Road Trip Notes and Rage of The Student

There was no humming, no music, nothing but the utmost seriousness at the base of Invader Zim later that evening. Zim's voot cruiser was too small to carry both Irkens and a Djemy, so Jendai had brought the large, white van-instead of the pickup. Its windows were heavily tinted, letting the drivers see clearly while obscuring the view from outside, allowing them to travel without their disguises. The back had a bed one could pull out for sleeping on the road, as well as cupboards and shelves installed for the storage of anything you needed for a long trip. Most of them had already been loaded with the Djemy's that had not been taken. Zim supplied some of the items that had been confiscated. Mainly, they were weapons and fuel cells, along with repair tools. He assumed Jendai had medical units already in the van, and neglected to bring any. Extra paste was collected for the Irken duo in case of rain. He also brought along his wig, contacts, germ spray, microgoggles, and a few other items necessary to an Invader's survival. The one thing he was unsure of what to do with was GIR. Jendai seemed to be having a hard enough time dealing with the capture of Merana, without GIR's obnoxious chatter. If he left it alone, the base would be gone in a manner of hours. But if he brought it along...
"Bring it," Jendai snapped, noting his hesitation. His disguise was off, showing the marks from his beating and the robotic legs on the gas and break pedals. "We need to get going. They have a twenty-four hour head start."
"YAY!" GIR squealed. "Road trip!" It scrambled into the back, Hobbes in one hand, its squeaky moose in the other. More than somewhat reluctantly, Zim climbed into the passenger side, snapping at GIR to be quiet. Once he was strapped in, Jendai started the engine and headed for the highway.
There was silence between all three for an hour, GIR playing with its moose, Zim staring out the window and Jendai concentrating on the highway before him. Few human vehicles graced the roadway. The drive would have been pleasant if not for the overwhelming silence. It was deafening, roaring through sensitive hearing organs to blind the sense into nothingness. Jendai chewed his lip. "We have enough cash to last for the drive there," he said finally. "What we're going to do about the way home, I don't know. Mer always has a plan. She'll know. It should take a week, round trip, tops. We have to get her back, Zim." He sighed heavily, switching on some quiet music. "Get some sleep. You'll need all your sanity for what we have to do."
The Invader curled into a ball in his seat. This wasn't his first rescue mission. Several of the other Soldiers in his unit had been taken prisoner once, on a planet trying to break off from the Empire. No one had been killed, thanks to the quick action of the their leader. Unfortunately, he wasn't so sure about the outcome of this mission, despite Jendai's utmost confidence in his abilities as a fighter. There were so many humans, and only two of them. Maybe that was the reason why the mechanic had asked him along. Even out the odds a bit. Still... Was it possible to overcome these chances? Mother of Irk, he supposed he'd had worse than this thrown at him.
He was a Soldier.
Soldiers didn't calculate the odds. That was for Students and Students alone. Regrettably, Jendai was too busy worrying about the Djemy to concentrate on the odds. Zim hadn't known an Irken in his life with this much devotion to one other than their superiors. His unit's leader had only gone to rescue the others because of the glory it would give him for doing so. Students were already different in so many other ways, so why not their devotion to their own kind as well? And, if they were devoted to their own kind, then why not other species as well? He wondered, briefly, if there was some ulterior motive behind Jendai's actions. Zim knew very well that Students loved one another. But, interspecies love? He shook his head slightly. Love was a somewhat alien emotion to a Soldier. He sighed, trying to clear his mind. His mission. What was he going to do about his mission? He frowned. Zim supposed it wasn't too terrible to do something like this, as long as it didn't interfere with his mission for too long. One mustn't disobey the Tallest. All these thoughts clouded his mind again. Zim forced them out. Once the Earth's sun rose, he'd see everything more clearly. Yes, once the sun rose, this nightmare would be over and he'd be back in his lab, putting on his disguise for Skool.
The sun did rise, but the nightmare did not end. In fact, it got worse.
GIR had begun to sing the Doom Song.
The two Irkens allowed the annoyance for hours, trading headphones Jendai had brought to drown out the sound, plugging them into the radio. Zim graciously gave Jendai longer turns, mostly because he was the one driving and because the Invader was more or less immune to the song. If the tall Irken noticed, he was too upset to say anything. During Zim's turns with the headphones, his eyes twitched constantly, sometimes hiding the nearly black circles under them. His injuries looked considerably better-save his lip. "You're going to chew that off, you know," Zim mumbled, removing the headphones from their place at the base of his antennae. "You must have something else you can chew on."
Surprised, Jendai looked down at his lower lip briefly. His eyes widened at the amount of raw flesh and rose-colored blood. He stopped abruptly, looking around for something. "Hand me that silver strip," he ordered. Zim picked it up, handed it to him and watched Jendai pop it in his mouth after unwrapping it. "Gum," the mechanic explained simply. "Human candy thing that you chew; you don't swallow the gum, but you can swallow the juice it makes. Works and tastes better than a lip."
Zim took a piece from the pile in the opened glove compartment. He chewed, testing the taste. It was fruity. "Not bad," he commented. Then he removed the headphones and handed them firmly to Jendai. Before the tall Irken could refuse, Zim explained his actions. "I'm unaffected by the song by now," he said. "You think this is bad, try six months of it."
Instead of his usual chuckle, Jendai snorted, sounding slightly impressed. Grudgingly, he took the headphones. Except for the sound of the Doom Song, the van was silent for the next few hours, the bleakness of the open road dominating the view. A few farms dotted the country, black forms of mountains dominating the horizon. There were barely any cars out, which struck Zim as odd. Perhaps this wasn't a main highway. He chewed his gum harder, trying to drown out the sound of GIR's singing. The sky was black with clouds, yet no rain had fallen on the planet recently. This would have been so much easier with his voot cruiser. But that would have been far too obvious. He was getting tired of simply sitting, watching the scenery flash by. "I should have brought some plans..." he muttered, bored.
GIR sang on.
Night fell, and with it came the rain. Despite the layers of paste both had applied prior to the trip and the protection of the van, both Irkens shuddered as the water poured down. Twitched in fear as the thunder boomed across the sky like some gong tolling the doom for the two aliens. Blinked in loathing as lightning streaked through the night, shining ominously inside the van. When the coming of the lightning, GIR had become silent, terrified. Canals of water graced the windshield, despite the wipers frantic efforts. Jendai's eyes refused to stop spasing. "Need a break," he breathed. Tense blue eyes scanned the roadways for a turnoff. "Starved." The twitch disappeared as he spotted one. "This isn't gonna be an ideal place," Jendai apologized. "But we need supplies. And some dinner. You gotta be hungry Zim."
The Invader nodded. "Can I have cupcakes?" GIR cooed from where it sat on the back of his seat. It was already dressed in its dog costume.
"If you don't sing that goddamn song anymore," Jendai retorted, smoothly making the turn. Now the lights from a truck stop were visible through the downpour. A gas station, store and restaurant. Huge semis were lined up in front of each building, their drivers inside enjoying the warmth and the company of their fellow truckers. The van was guided into an open spot under the overhang of the gas station, allowing the occupants to slide/turn on their disguises before exiting. An attendant approached them. "Fill it up," Jendai ordered. "Regular. We'll be back in an hour or so." He looked down at Zim. "C'mon, we need stuff." The Invader followed, dragging GIR along on its leash.
It stank in the store, which was expected. Jendai wandered off to collect what he needed, leaving Zim to pick up cupcakes to keep GIR occupied. "Can I have cupcakes and a freezie, Master?" the robot asked. "I won't sing the Doom Song anymore." It saluted in promise.
Zim sighed. "Fine," he said. "Only if you don't sing the Doom Song for the rest of the trip. If you do, I will be forced to throw your cupcakes out the window." He scanned the shelves for the cupcakes. "Lessee... Ho-Hoes... Dingdongs... Twinkies..." Zim frowned. "What is with these hUuuumans and their names for food?" he growled. After a while, he gave up. "Geh! You pick one, GIR."
"Okeydokey!" GIR skipped up to the shelf and pulled off a bag of jellybeans. "I want these!" it cooed with joy. "I like Jelly Belly's!"
"I thought you wanted cupcakes..." Zim muttered, bemused.
It froze. "Now I want Beans!" GIR said as if the answer were obvious. "There's more of them in the baggy so they stay longer! Can I get my freezie now?"
"Yes..." He watched it skip away, homing in on the place where the brainfreezie machine was kept. Would he ever begin to understand that thing? Was it just that GIR was far too advanced for even the great Invader's brain to comprehend? Perhaps it was just that whenever GIR's advanced properties turned on, Zim was just too tired to appreciate them. He sighed again, following his robot slave. Once again, it was having problems reaching the machine. Once again, Zim climbed on its head to get the freezie. The whole operation gave the Irken a feeling of deja vu. He glanced over his shoulder to check for Dib, only to come face to face with a brown paper bag. Zim almost fell from his perch on GIR's head. "Whoa!" A hand reached down to steady him. "Easy, Invader," Jendai laughed. "Did I scare you?"
"No." He climbed down, handing GIR its freezie. "Should we trade money for these supplies?" he asked.
"Trade money...? Oh, pay! Yeah, c'mon." Jendai led the way to the counter, shifting the weight of the sack to his other arm. He set the sack down, placing the freezie and the bag of jellybeans beside it. Briefly, he spoke with the cashier, then collected the supplies and returned to where the Invader stood. "Let's head out."
GIR kept its promise not to sing. It ate its jellybeans and drank its freezie, then resorted to watching the lightning flash across the sky. Zim busied himself with putting the things away in the cupboards. Ketchup, bread, shredded lettuce, cookies, and some sort of human alcohol. For a moment, he studied the drink. Then, with a shrug, placed it in the correct place and grabbed two packages of cookies before returning to his seat for the duration of the drive. One, he handed to Jendai; the other was kept for himself with a few doled out to a begging GIR.

"That's where the human government keeps its secrets?" Zim asked, incredulous. "Right out in the open where something could just walk right in and take them? That thing is so gigantic it practically screams 'Military Secrets Inside!' How stupid are these pitiful stink monkeys?"
Jendai looked out the window at the large, pentagonal building they were driving past. After trying days on the road, the Irkens were at their destination. "Merana's in there," he murmured. "Security's going to be tight. I suggest we separate." At Zim's disbelieving scoff, he continued. "If one of us can get to wherever they're keeping her, they can tell the other where she is. Or if you stumble on a computer of sorts..." He grinned. "We can have fun." He drove a few blocks away, found a parking space, and turned off the van. Both donned their disguises. "Here GIR," the mechanic called, tossing a cube with many different colored squares on it to the robot. "It's called a Rubix Cube. If you can get all the colors lined up by the time we get back, we'll buy you some tacos or cupcakes or whatever." GIR squealed, delighted with its new toy. "We're out of here," Jendai said. They opened their doors, jumping out in unison.
Streets were crossed, human drivers yelled at, curses shouted, but in the end, they made it to the government building. With a nod, they separated. Zim found himself facing a high fence. The bars were spaced too close together for a human, not too close for the smallest Irken Invader. Finally, a chance to put his Invader skills to work! Carefully, he slipped through the fence, antennae alert beneath his wig for any primitive alarms. If this were an Irken facility, he'd have been caught for a long time now. For once he was glad of the pathetic human technology. Their immature security might be the thing that would save the Djemy's life. Cautiously, he darted across the grass, taking advantage of every bit of cover as he had been taught in his Academy. Bushes lined the first floor of the building. Such décor was exactly what he needed. He darted into the cover, pausing for a quick breath only when he was sure he was securely hidden.
Now which way?
To the left was Jendai's path. To the right was... something else. The Soldier ducked to his right, careful not to let the bushes rustle, lest a patrol hear his movements. It took a great deal of concentration. There had to be an entrance somewhere. Every so often, he paused, removed his wig and listened. So far, no one was following him. His superb Invader skills were paying off! Not even the egotistic humans could hold anything to him, the one who had been chosen for this very dangerous mission. Okay, so he'd ruined OID I... but he was making up for it. Invader Zim would show them.
He was so wrapped up in his gloating that he almost failed to notice the ventilation shaft that appeared beside him. There was always a shaft; that was the first rule of his training. Other species were always stupid enough to leave such a space open. Irkens made sure never to leave vents open, that way their strongholds could be even more impenetrable. Falling to his knees, Zim inspected the opening. Just barely big enough for him to squeeze through. Unfortunately, he would be crawling on his hands and knees through all the filth and there was a tightly sealed grate over it. Nothing an Invader couldn't handle. His robotic legs emerged, forming into a square shape at his gesture. From their tips came lazer-like beams designed to slice through whatever their owner told them to. One, quick blast later, the grate fell to the ground with a soft thud. Dust puffed out, making him cough. With a shudder, the Invader began his gruesome task, snarling. Stupid filthy germs, everywhere. His antennae twitched. Slowly, he peeked around the bushes, locating the source of the noise. Humans were lined up, waiting to enter the building. He laughed. How stupid were they? This was a highly guarded military facility! Did they think they were just going to stroll through and take a tour of such a place?
Shrugging his shoulders at the stupidity of humans, Zim squeezed through the vent, wincing as his back pod snagged on the rough metal. A moment of tugging freed him. The vent was cool under his gloves, although the dust clogged his mouth and throat. It finally got so bad that Zim activated the breathing bubble designed for Invaders fighting in space or places where the atmosphere was hostile. This was certainly a hostile atmosphere. It was dark inside, no light penetrating even through other grates. Cold also enveloped him. The shaft creaked with every move he made. It made him nervous.
A particularly loud creak caused the Invader to freeze. Every muscle in his body was tensed, waiting to see if the metal would cave beneath his little frame. After a moment, he sighed, relaxing. It would not cave. Daringly, he inched forward, a bold grin showing his teeth to the world. Ah, the bliss of being an Invader, the highest rank of all Soldiers. None were as smart, as agile, as graceful, as completely competent as an Invader was. No one else could have navigated this treacherous ventilation shaft as easily. "Invaders are utterly supreme," he snickered to himself before the new section of the shaft disintegrated beneath him, sending him plummeting to the floor.
He landed in the seat of what appeared to be a miniature car. Unfortunately, in response to the jar of his landing, the mini-car sped forward. Zim yelped, grasping the steering wheel. He was in a long hallway of some kind. A long hallway with humans. They shouted curses at him, but were unable to catch the speeding vehicle. Zim cackled with glee as they vanished behind him. Irkens were superior! The greatest species in the universe! "Stupid human-huh!?" he squeaked as he spotted other mini-cars behind him. And they were gaining. He rounded a corner, trying to lose them. There had to be a way to speed the car up! His mind dredged up the memory of Jendai's robotic legs working the peddles of his van to increase or decrease the vehicle's speed. It was time for something daring. Out came the lower pair of legs, these hopefully out of sight. They slid down to the peddles, pushing the larger one experimentally.
The car jerked to a stop. He snarled in frustration and pushed the smaller one. His getaway craft sped forward again, leaving the humans behind. They were heavier, which impaired their cars' maximum velocity, whereas the Irken was small, giving him the greater speed in theory. This was part of the reason the race was one of the most known and most feared. Their small, agile crafts alone could cause a substantial amount of damage to almost anything while they saved their larger, bulkier ships for more defensive tactics and transportation. The galactic superpowers had laughed at the Irkens' "backwards" method of warfare-until their planets laid in ruin. A door opened ahead of him, two humans starting to exit. The Invader headed in a straight line for the opening. Barely before the car made impact, the humans jumped out of the way, trying to save themselves from harm. Even the small car tore the doorframe from its "secure" wooden mounting. Zim looked back with distain. He would hate to see what his voot cruiser would do to a human building... The Invader had no time to think further on the subject, as the human pursuers were close behind him. Laughing manically, he steered the car through more walls, failing to notice the horrified looks of the humans within the rooms. This was almost better than the Conqueror876, the giant mech he'd driven in Impending Doom I. Well... almost.
He burst through several more doors, feeling the car shudder with each blow. Zim wondered how much more of the beating the car could take before it was destroyed. Better use it while he could! Zim cackled insanely. More humans were following him now, chasing him with anything they could find, all the while shouting at him to stop. It was time to put his diversion plan into effect! Diversions were his specialty! A grim, almost crazed smile took its place over Zim's lips. Once he destroyed this car, he could go find Jendai while the humans were sufficiently distracted by the explosion. Now, all he had to do was find the right wall...
There! Directly in his path was a wall with a large map on it. Destroying this would most likely cause great panic among the humans, as maps were usually of importance to any race. About two yards away from the map was a door leading out into a large hallway with many probable hiding places for a tiny Invader. He kept one leg on the gas, tensing his body to jump before the impact could harm him in any way. Seconds before the car smashed headlong, he jumped free, hoping to the Mother of Irk he'd get far enough away in case there was a large explosion. The ground met his face, the hard carpet scratching his green skin. He rolled expertly, feeling the heat of a small blast singe his uniform. Zim kept rolling. He didn't want to be seen escaping.
Something heavy stopped him from continuing on his rolling path. Zim's pulse raced. He'd been discovered! Cautiously, he looked up, wanting to meet this human face to face, without fear and without hesitation. "Great job Zim," the something said, a slight sarcastic tone to its voice. "I think you passed your last test to become an Invader."
He blinked, uncurling. "Jendai!" Zim squeaked. "How did you get in!?" It was then he noticed the large group of humans milling around the hallway, listening to another human explain the use of the room they were currently in.
"I followed the tour," Jendai said simply, smiling. "It was easier than hijacking a golf cart. And you won't believe the stuff they're showing us! The room we're looking for should be next. Come on." He began to walk away, pretending not to watch Zim follow him. He knew he'd humiliated the Invader. That hadn't been his intent but... well, you took your laughs where you could get them, he supposed. Just as long as the laughs didn't involve beatings... Shrugging the thought off, the mechanic waited for Zim to catch up before resuming his place at the back of the tour group.
They wound through more hallways, not paying attention to what the human was saying. Finally, Jendai grabbed Zim, backing into an archway where no one could see them, eyes alert for a spy. "This is where we need to be," he explained. "There's going to be security cameras, but we're in too deep of shadows to be seen." He grinned. "Okay, we need to stay out of sight until the time is right. All we have to do is wait until the human who owns this office comes in and we can question them..." An evil look crossed his face.
"Where are we?" Zim asked in an equally hushed tone. He was shoved gently back into the shadows. Jendai backed up with him, his pulse beating so loud Zim thought even the half-deaf humans could hear it flowing through the other Irken's veins. After a moment, the tour left the room, their footsteps echoing down the long, winding corridors. Both breathed a sigh of absolute relief.
"We're in the office of..." Jendai's eyes rolled back as he searched his memory. "Some human who's called the... 'Secretary of Defense' or something. Some high-ranking military human." He gave an unconcerned shrug. "I've seen him on the TV. He's fat, slow and not too bright. Couple of healthy Irkens, we won't have any trouble getting information from him." One hand flexed into a fist, unconsciously. He settled down against the wall to wait, Zim, drawing his knees to his chest, sitting beside him.

They were rewarded for their patience when darkness had fallen. Each Irken was invisible, save their glowing eyes, which were hidden behind disguises. A fat human walked in, muttering to himself about some incompetence, some idiocy of his fellow politicians. Without a word, they removed their disguises, revealing two pairs of shining Irken eyes, one blue and hard, the other red and determined. Silently, they emerged from the shadows. They didn't care who saw them now, no human would believe their eyes if they were paying attention to the tapes anyway. Zim's blaster safety clicked off, the sound barely noticeable in the large room. Even then, the human whirled to face them, coming face to face with a pissed off, 5'7" male, blue-eyed Irken mechanic, whose robotic legs were splayed in a defiant fighting stance. "Hello," Jendai Kaalae purred dangerously. Zim jumped up on the desk behind the human, brandishing his weapon. The Invader didn't have the physical prowess-compared to humans-that Jendai did, and looked far less imposing weaponless. "I heard you picked up an 'alien' a few days ago." His antennae brushed each other. "Where is she?"
The human paled, stammering. Before he could speak, Jendai had him by the collar of his shirt and had slammed him down on the desk. Zim stood by, never moving the blaster. "Pathetic human!" the Soldier snapped. "Did you not hear the question!?" He moved the blaster closer to the human's greasy face. "Answer him or else you will be killed!" Jendai tightened his grip for further emphasis.
"God, I don't know!" the human wailed. "Don't kill me! I swear to god I don't know anything!"
"Liar!" Jendai shouted, trembling with barely leashed fury. "LIAR!" In a single, liquid motion, the human was thrown against the fall. Black-gloved hands supported him a full foot above the floor. Jendai drew back, striking him with horrific force until his neck went slack. Violently, Jendai threw him to the floor, his body making a dull, hollow thud with the impact. The Student's chest heaved, his hands shook, and a primal snarl twisted his olive-green face into a mask of legendary evil. In the semi-darkness, his blue eyes were the only things visible. He was like a silhouette with living, hating, murdering eyes. This new side almost scared Zim. He loomed over the cowering human, one robotic leg poised for the killing strike over his throat, the rest arched threateningly. "I will ask you one more time, you lying sonofabitch, asshole," he hissed. "Where the hell is Merana Sali!?"
This time the human chose to comply. "We took her to... to Sector 45... Old base... up on North Rise... disguised as an animal shelter..." he gasped as Jendai's leg put more pressure on his jugular. A bright point of crimson welled up from the spot. "They want to... perform an autopsy of her..."
"Son of a bitch. She's dead?" The words were softly spoken, yet held a scream of anger. Zim swallowed heavily, readying the blaster in case the human answered "yes."
"N-n-No!" he whimpered. "They were going to use her as bait to get you!"
Zim's eyes narrowed. "How do you know that, stinkbeast?" he sneered.
"They told me..." The man had gone gray. "They told me that a green alien was the one they were looking for... And that if... if they had her, you would follow and they could capture you too..."
Jendai cursed and grabbed the blaster from Zim, silently clicking the setting to stun. The human didn't notice. He was too focused on his fate. "If you even think about sounding the alarm after we're gone," the mechanic hissed, eyes flashing maliciously. "we will hunt you down like an animal and annihilate you down to your very last cell." The blaster swung, aiming between the human's fearful brown eyes. "Say good-bye, human bastard." Lips pulled back in the nightmare grimace, he pulled the trigger, despite the pitiful scream of the human. No sound came from the blaster. No wound emerged on the ashen forehead. Yet the human fell limp just the same. Calmly, the Irkens left the room, taking their new knowledge and their weapon with them.
From the control room, several humans watched the display with growing smirks on their usually blank faces. One froze the image of Jendai's face, froze it as the mechanic glanced coolly over his shoulder at the stunned body on the floor. "This, gentlemen," the man at the console said to those behind him. "is the alien menace we're dealing with. As you can see, the Secretary was easily persuaded by this duo to divulge our captives whereabouts." He turned to face them. "All is going as planned."
There were nods. "Shall we intercept them before they can get in?"
"No," the first man said, his gray eyes glinting. "Let them think all is going as they plan. Let them feel secure in their plot. Once they reach her..." He folded his hands, watching the image of Jendai's face as if it would spring to life once more. "Capture the tall one. Do what you please with the short one. It is of no consequence to us. The tall one... I have a personal grudge with him." He frowned. "Bring him to me. I'll deal with Jendai Kaalae as I please..."
"Yes sir."
They left the room, leaving him to brood over his revenge against the mechanic who had foiled his chance to be believed all those years ago. "Yes, Kaalae," he smirked. "Yes. Come and repay the favor to Merana Sali. I assure you..." One hand patted the gun at his hip. "This time, you will come out of this fight with more than paralyzed limbs." A short, barking laugh. "If all goes well, you will not come out of this fight at all."
He left then, going to help his fellow agents with their preparations.

Again, major thankies to Shatai for his help in this! Couldn't have done it without him! R&R both of our stuff if ya luv us! Mawhah, aren't I evil? Two cliffhangers in a row? Stay tuned for chapter 7! Oh, and I only own Jendai, Merana... and Frank, as ashamed of him I am. Everyone else is property of their creators!