Part 3~ Devastation and Hope

First of all, thank you so much for all the nice reviews!!! I really do appreciate it!!! So anywayz, here's the next part. Please read and review!!!

Chandler sat by Monica's bed, watching her sleep. She was asleep when he got there, and he didn't want to wake her up. He'd spent the past few nights there with her, with the other's visiting during the day.

Monica opened her eyes to see Chandler sitting next to her. He was flipping through a magazine and didn't look up until she said "Hey you."

"Hey," Chandler said back.

"What time is it?"

"Um, about quarter till 9," he looked down at his watch. "How do you feel?"

Monica just shrugged, "Been better," she paused before saying something else. "Hey, um, can I ask you something?"

"Yeah, anything," Chandler set the magazine down and looked up at her with a smile.

"Do you think I should tell Richard?" Monica asked, "About the baby?"

Chandler hadn't been expecting that and didn't know what to say. He looked down, and when he looked back up, Monica's eyes were pleading him to tell her what to do. "Mon…I don't know. I'm sorry, sweetie, but I don't know."

"Well, if you were him…would you want to know?"

"If I were him I never would have let you go in the first place," Chandler thought out loud and then looked down, slightly embarrassed.

Monica smiled slightly. He still hadn't answered her question.

Chandler cleared his throat, "I don't know…I've never really thought about it before."

Monica just nodded.

"Sorry," he added.

"That's okay," Monica answered quietly.

Chandler took her hand and opened his mouth as if he was going to say something, but was interrupted by the door opening.

"Hey, Mon," Rachel said, walking in with Phoebe and Joey.

Monica said hi back, and glanced once more at Chandler, wondering what he was going to say before turning her attention back to the other three people in the room.

After a while, Rachel took Chandler off to the side. "I'm going to stay with Monica tonight," she told him.

"I will, I don't min-"

Rachel cut him off, "No, you go home, sleep. You haven't slept much lately. I'll stay, you go home." Chandler reluctantly agreed and left with Joey and Phoebe, saying that he'd come by either the next morning or during his lunch break.

"So," Rachel said after they left.

"Hey, can I ask you something?" Monica asked and Rachel nodded. "Was Chandler…did he find me?" she asked, looking down, not about to meet Rachel's eye.

"Yeah," Rachel answered quietly.

"He's kind of a mess, isn't he?" she still didn't look up.

"Yeah, kind of. I don't think that he's gotten much sleep lately…I don't know though, he's here when he's not at work," she smiled at Monica. "I think you scared him though," she added in a more serious tone. "you scared all of us," she added under her breath, but Monica heard.

"I am so sorry," she looked up at Rachel, tears in her eyes.

"Hey, it's okay," Rachel had to fight herself not to cry and hugged Monica, "hey, that rhymed," they both laughed.

"You really don't need to stay, I never asked Chandler to, he just did. If you want to leave you can," Monica said after she pulled away.

"I'll stay, I don't mind," Rachel smiled as she sat down.

"Thank you," Monica said gratefully.

"No problem."

~*~

Chandler walked into Monica's room the next morning. He woke Rachel up and told her to go home and get ready for work. He didn't want to wake Monica up, so eventually, he gave in and left for work.

Monica woke up alone. The past few days that Chandler had stayed with her, she'd fallen asleep in his arms, so when he left she'd wake up. But today she was alone. Monica looked around her room, at the flowers and balloons her friends had brought her and her eyes landed on bedside table. She noticed another thing of flowers that hadn't been there before. She reached for the card that was attached and read it:

Let me be the one you call

If u jump I'll break your fall

Lift you up and fly away with you into the night

If you need to fall apart

I can mend a broken heart

If you need to crash then crash and burn

You're not alone

She smiled at the words to "Crash and Burn" by Savage Garden and turned over the paper, but nothing more was written on it, not even who it was from. 'Weird,' she thought, but shrugged it off.

~*~

"So," Chandler said, "I missed you this morning." Monica smiled. "I did come by and told Rachel to leave. I stayed for awhile but didn't want to wake you up."

'Ohhh,' Monica thought, realizing how it must feel when Joey finally puts two and two together. Chandler left the note and flowers.

"Thank you."

"For what?" he asked, taking the last bite of his sandwich and crumpling the wrapper up. Monica looked at the flowers. "You're welcome," he grinned and threw the wadded up paper in to the trashcan that was across the room, but he completely missed it.

"You suck," Monica laughed.

Chandler smiled, he hadn't heard her laugh in a long time. "What, you think you could do better?"

"No, I know I could do better."

Chandler dug around in his briefcase before pulling out a notebook. He ripped a sheet of paper out of it and handed it to Monica. She crumpled it up and shot it, making it into the trashcan. She looked at Chandler and grinned.

"Luck shot," he said and tore another sheet out.

Half an hour and another notebook later, Ross walked in and found Monica and Chandler still playing and laughing. Wait, Monica was laughing? Monica was laughing. He smiled and decided to thank Chandler later.

Ross looked around at all the wadded up sheets of paper. "What are you guys doing?"

"Playing paper-basketball, what's it look like we're doing?" Chandler answered.

"And what's the score, Chandler?" Monica asked innocently.

"I think it's best for my ego if I don't answer that question," he said, looking down at his watch. "Shit! Is that really what time it is? I gotta go," he jumped up. "Bye, Mon," he gave her a kiss on the cheek before running out of there, and straight into a doctor who opened the door.

"sorry," he said before taking off again.

"Monica Gellar?" the doctor asked. She was a short blonde woman with glasses, who looked around 50, and came off as very affable. "I'm Dr. Stephenson, a psychiatrist," she added with a smile.

"I'm going to go, I'll come back later," Ross excused himself.

"So," the woman began, "Do you feel better today, you're looking better." Monica just nodded, so she continued. "If you feel uncomfortable about anything we're talking about, feel free to not answer. I've been informed about your situation, and it's routine to talk to you and make sure you're not a threat to yourself before you're released," she continued talking, "So, tell me about yourself."

"Um, well, I'm 26. I'm a chef, or at least trying to be one. I live in the city…"she didn't know what else to say.

"I've been told you're engaged," the doctor said after a few minutes of silence.

Monica almost laughed, she'd forgotten about that. "No, I'm not."

The doctor looked up at her, "Did you break up?"

"No, I never was engaged. My friend just said that so he could see me."

"Oh," she wrote something down. "Was he one of the two who just left?"

"Yeah, the one that ran into you, sorry about that, by the way," Monica smiled.

"Have the two of you ever been romantically involved?"

"No, why?"
"Just wondering. I've noticed that he's been staying here with you at night. So how did you two meet?"

"He was my brother's roommate in college , and her moved into the apartment across from mine a few years ago."
The doctor just nodded and wrote something else down on her notepad. "If you wouldn't mind, would you tell me some of the events that led up to the 'incident'?"

Monica understood what she meant and nodded, pausing before speaking. "Well, umm, I'd just broken up with my boyfriend and just felt like I hit rock bottom."

"What were the circumstances for which you broke up? If you don't mind me asking, of course…"

"We didn't want the same things. I wanted a family, he didn't," Monica said quietly.

"One last question," the doctor looked up from her notes. "Are you happy that your incident wasn't successful?"

"More than you'll ever know," Monica looked up at her and gave her a slight smile. "I guess sometimes you have to hit rock bottom the realize how lucky you actually are and how much you have."
Dr. Stephenson smiled. "And it sounds like you have a lot to live for, Monica. You have someone who lied just to see you, that's something. He cares about you. Don't forget any of that," she stood up. "It was nice meeting you, Miss Gellar. If you promise to see a psychiatrist, then I'll say you can go."

"Okay," Monica returned her smile.

"Good luck," she shook her hand before leaving.

~*~

Monica looked around and zipped up the bag hat Rachel had brought her with clothes in it. She thought about the past couple of weeks. She knew she'd screwed up, and prayed to God that she could turn back time. She was devastated over losing the baby. She would've wanted it, but it scared her that Richard wouldn't have.

"Ready to go?" Chandler interrupted her thoughts by walking in.

"More than you'll ever know," Monica turned around and smiled at him. "I hate hospitals."

Chandler had to bite his tongue to keep from saying 'then don't put yourself in one'. Instead he just smiled and held out his hand, which she happily took, and said, "Rachel's getting a cab."

They walked outside and saw Rachel down the street, jumping up and down, waving her arms above her head to get their attention.

Monica laughed at how ridiculous she looked.

Chandler smiled. Every time Monica smiled or laughed, he felt a little less guilty and was a little more reassured that everything was going to be all right. He put his arm around her and pulled her closer, kissing the top of her head.

Monica looked up at him, and Chandler saw something in her eyes that had been gone for a long time. He wasn't sure what it was, but he was glad that it was there.

~*~

After the six of them ate what had been their first real meal in a long time, they decided to go down to Central Perk. Chandler offered to stay and help Monica do dishes. Monica just smiled and turned the radio on, humming along quietly as she did the dishes.

Chandler smiled. He heard "Crash and Burn" come on, and he turned it up and walked over to Monica. "Listen to the words," he whispered.

Monica turned around to face him. He took her face in his hands and whispered the first verse to her.

When you feel all alone

And the world has turned its back on you

Give me a moment please

to tame your wild wild heart

I know you feel like the walls are closing in on you

It's hard to find relief and people can be so cold

When darkness is upon you door

And you feel like you can't take any more

Let me be the one you call

If u jump I'll break your fall

Lift you up and fly away with you into the night

If you need to fall apart

I can mend a broken heart

If you need to crash then crash and burn

You're not alone

Monica wrapped her arms around Chandler's neck and hugged him tightly, listening to the rest of the song in his arms. "Thank you," she said, still not letting go.

"For what?" Chandler asked.

Monica leaned back so she could see his face. "For being you," she simply stated.

"Wow, that's about the easiest thing I've ever done to deserve a 'thank you,'" he smiled back.

"Don't make me regret that, Bing," Monica warned, but couldn't hide her smile.

"I don't think you ever could," he smiled back. "Let's go," he said, turning the radio off before walking over to the door.

Monica just smiled, everything was going to be just fine. She looked up at Chandler, who grinned back.

Just fine.

So that's it!! I'm not gonna continue this anymore. I don't own "crash and burn" savage garden does. It wouldn't have been out yet at the time this fic would've taken place, but whatever, it's fanFICTION. So, anywayz please review!!! Thanx : )