Disclaimer: Aaron Sorkin owns all of the characters. I am the puppeteer. Be afraid.

LOST: MITTENS
Description:
Black and white,
fuzzy, small, cute.
REWARD
Call Donna Moss


"Hey Donna, I didn't know that you have a cat."
"I don't."
Josh blinked at her. "Oh. Oh, right. I'm guessing that was wit, but I'm still the king."
"Josh... what are you-"
"I meant to say I didn't know you HAD a cat."
"Josh, if this is from a lack of caffeine that you're hallucinating, I will break my code of ethics and get you some coffee."
"I appreciate the offer, but I have six cups on my desk already."
"Busy morning?"
"...Of course they're not full or anything."
"You are a nut. I'm going to put the rest of these up." She was referring to the fliers.
"I may be a nut, but at least I didn't lose my cat."
"Go drink your coffee."
"I'm the boss. I tell people what to do. Not you."
"Go drink your coffee."
"I'm going to go and drink my coffee, but not because you said so."
"Right, Josh."
--------
"Donna, me and Toby have a surprise for you."
"Where's Toby?"
Sam looked around and sighed. "I guess he ran off."
Donna smiled. "So what is it? Tropical island getaway? Skis?"
Josh poked his head out of his office, "I guess you really like the best of both extremes Donna."
"Yes, I do."
"The only problem is, I'm not hearing any work getting done."
"Shush. Sam brought me a present."
"Really?"
Sam sighed. "Yes, and it's liable to die if it don't give it up soon."
"Hear that Josh? He's giving me a present."
"And it's apparently alive."
Sam finally gave up and shoved a towel into Donna's lap, not planning on waiting any longer. "Here. Surprise."
"Oh! It's a presidential White House towel!"
"Look inside Donna."
"Oh." She grinned sheepishly up at Sam.
The towel mewed.
"It's... a cat."
The cat mewed.
"Yeah. Aren't you happy?"
"I really can't say."
"But I found your Mittens."
"Really? Can I have them, please?"
"It's... It's in your lap."
"That's a cat."
Josh laughed at them both. "And I thought I was hopeless."
"You are!" They chorused back.
Toby walked by. "I heard insults, I wanted to take part. I hear you have your cat back, Donna."
"It's not my cat!"
"No?"
"No Toby, it's not!"
"Hm. Okay."
Donna sighed and put the cat in Sam's hands. "I would have thought you guys would be a little bit smarter."
Toby blinked. "Josh, did your secretary just call me dumb?"
"Actually, she's my-"
"Personal assistant." Donna concluded.
Sam sat there, petting the cat. "I'm not going to say anything because I know I'm dumb."
"Guys," Donna sighed, "The sign does not say 'Lost: Cat', it says 'Lost: Mittens'. 'Mittens' is not the name of my cat."
"What IS the name of your cat?"
"I don't have a cat, Sam!"
"But you put up fliers..."
Josh laughed as Toby tried not to smile.
"I. Lost. A. Pair. Of. Mittens."
"Oh."
"Sam, you get smarter every day."
"Shut up Toby."
"What did you say oh deputy of mine?"
"...Nothing."
CJ walked up, "Come on, come on."
She clapped her hands, "You're wasting time."
"CJ, there's nothing to do."
"Au contraire-"
"CJ!!"
"Yes... Donna..."
"Where... where did you find those... those..."
CJ looked around, "Would someone help her?"
Everyone just stared at CJ.
"What? The clapping put you all in a trance?"
"CJ... I think you have my mittens."
"Really? These were sitting on my desk. I thought they were a gift from... no one."
Josh, Sam, and Toby each raised an eyebrow.
"From... no one?" Josh ventured.
"Oh shut up, Josh."
"I wasn't talking to you, Donna."
"You're being mean."
CJ shook her head. "Do you want these back, Donna?"
"You know what? You can keep them."
"Really?"
"Yes, just do one thing for me."
"Alright."
"Describe them."
"Describe them?"
"Yes."
"Well... Okay... They're white set on black... Made for small, slim hands but a nice fit, and... fuzzy. For lack of a better word."
"Is there one word that you could sum that all up with?"
CJ pondered this for a moment. "This is trite and completely uncharacteristic of my vocabulary... But they are, in all honesty, kind of... cute."
Donna smiled. "Thank you CJ."
"I don't know what I did, but okay. I've got work to do... And so does everyone else!"
She left and Donna smiled at Toby, Sam, and Josh. "Do I win, or what?"
"No one uses the word 'cute' to describe inanimate objects!"
"You're just jealous Josh."
"Of what? The fact that CJ got the mittens?"
"Well that and the fact that I won."
Toby shook his head and walked away. Sam shrugged at Josh and Donna.
"Hey, do you think he'd make a good mascot or something?"
"You can't have a cat in the White House, Sam."
"I'll keep him out of your part of it, then."
"You can't have a cat!"
Sam walked away, not listening to Josh. Danny walked past and abruptly stopped in front of Donna and Josh.
"Have either of you seen a cat?"
"...A cat?" Donna asked quietly.
"Yeah. It was for CJ. Kind of a step up from the goldfish."
"Oh. Yah. She got it. Loved it. I think... she named it Mittens."
"Oh, thanks." He ran off.
"Josh!" Donna hissed at him.
He smirked. "It could have been worse - I could have told him the truth."
--------
"Cute mittens, CJ."
"Thank you, Dr. Bartlet."
--------
"Sir, I have a question."
"What is it this time, Leo? Health care again? Or is it about the damn rose garden?"
"Actually... I was wondering why Sam gets a kitten and I don't."