DISCLAIMER: Same thing
AUTHOR'S NOTES: Part two! It's here! Yay yay yay! And Tasuki and Hotohori finally came to me, YES!
On a MUCH happier note..... THE FIFTH GRAPHIC NOVEL IS OUT! YES YES YES YES! It's got the really cool pic of Yui as the Seiryu no Miko and Nakago's profile as the background on the cover. I need money desperately, I need to buy the two seasons (I already own the OVAs) so I can stop borrowing them from my friend, and so I can buy the rest of the manga! Money!!!!!!
I wish they'd get something up on the categories thing about "sad". "Angst" is good, but this isn't really angst-y... I don't think anyway. Oh well. This chapter has bad language, and again the thing about male relationships applies.
Now stop listening to me babble and READ!
PS-- Jet-puffed marshmellows make some really funky shapes when squashed right.
PPs-- (added five days after original notes) I now own some real chopsticks! I'm eating grapes with them right now. Happy Kaze-chan:o) AND THANK GODS FF.N'S BACK UP!
I found out all too soon what Taiitsu-kun had meant.
"CHICHIRI-SAMA!" A mass of tiny, incredibly perky girls with blue hair and large eyes abruptly popped out of the air above my bed at near dawn the next day, then just as abruptly fell on me.
"ITAIIIIII NO DA!" I yelled, being squashed beneath the babbling little things. Nyan nyans were fine one or two at a time, sometimes even five, but this many.... All at once... And all of them climbing all over me!
"Chichiri-sama! Chichiri-sama!" "It's been a long time!" "Why don't you come to Mt. Taikyoku anymore?" "CHICHIRI-SAMA, SHE TOOK MY CANDY!"
"GET OFF ME NO DA!" I started throwing nyan nyans left and right, not worrying about hurting them because they simply bounced off whatever they hit and landed on the floor. Once they were off, they took the hint and stayed off. However, they began climbing all over everything else, grabbing at my possessions, tugging the staff off the dresser, pulling open the drawers and inspecting the few contents. Many things that weren't even mine, but had been placed there for decoration, were flying across the room.
I did not want to have to pay for all that. "NYAN! PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER NO DA!"
The identical little girls all looked at me as one, blinked as one, and again as one began to glow with a pinkish light, swirled through with blue streaks. There was a near-blinding flash of light, and when I blinked my eye clear, there was one girl standing in the middle of the floor, my mask in her hands, grinning. "Gomen nasai, Chichiri-san, they're harder to control when they're excited." She held out the mask helpfully to me.
I groaned. I should have known what my sensei had meant. Being woken up by Nyan's many, identical, untactful, um, sections would put anyone in a bad mood. And having them be excited to see me after so long would make them almost impossible to corral. I muttered under my breath while I accepted the mask and fixed it on. I turned and gave Nyan a look, and she grinned again as she left the room, giving me privacy in which to dress.
I hurriedly pulled on my clothes, the same outfit I'd worn nearly every day since becoming a monk. I absently took note of the fact that I might have to get something new to wear soon, dragged my fingers through my bangs, and braced myself. "You can come back, Nyan no da."
The door burst open and Nyan ran in again, throwing herself on me and hugging me tightly, and I hugged her back. While her apparently-six-year-old counterparts could be very annoying, seemingly-eleven-year-old Nyan was almost normal, considering she lived with Taiitsu-kun. In my months at Mt. Taikyoku she'd become a good friend, almost like a sister. "Nyan, what are you doing here no da?"
She pulled back, smiling, and sat on my bed. "You're going to Hokkan today."
I felt a cloud pass over my face, even under my mask, remembering our task, and simply nodded. She continued, sympathy evident in her voice, but talking calmly. "You no longer have your powers. I'm going to keep the portal open for you, and be on watch."
I nodded again, looking up at the door to my room, grimacing slightly at the thought of waking everyone up this early. "Is the portal open now?" I saw her sky-blue head nod out of the corner of my eye. "It won't stay open for long, will it?" Again her head moved, answering no this time. I sighed. "Just keep out of the way, Tasuki doesn't like being woken up." I heard her muffle a giggle and jump off the bed as I took up the staff and opened the door to my room, preparing to lead everyone to our grim task.
I hadn't been able to sleep well that night. Dreams kept coming to me, dreams of should-haves and might-have-beens, much worse than before, perhaps because I knew that today I'd have to face my failure. Face Nuriko... one of the faces that haunted my dreams. Never accusing, no, not him, and not Shoka or Chiriko either. They were always forgiving, telling me I had done my best, or I had saved them, or... but I couldn't see it that way, I knew I had failed them. I had failed them, and they were dead.
I was sitting in the solitary chair in my room, my elbow propped on the arm of the chair and my head balanced on my fist, staring into the pre-dawn darkness and thinking. I couldn't really do much else besides sit there; for some reason moving in and of itself was almost impossible. I smiled grimly at the irony: the doctor didn't know what was wrong with himself. Appropriate, in a way.
A soft tapping and a familiar jiggle reached my ears, and I managed to pull myself out of the chair. The floor was cold beneath my bare feet, a sure sign of the approaching winter. I pulled open the door to find Chichiri, dressed for cold weather in the coat he'd worn the last time in Hokkan, and an adolescent girl with sky-blue hair waiting for me, both with stoic expressions on their faces. I gave Chichiri a questioning look, and he nodded quietly. I returned the nod and shut the door, quickly getting dressed and finding my own coat. I stepped out of the room a few moments later to find them still there, Chichiri leaning against the wall and the girl sitting on the railing. They both looked up at the noise of the door opening, the same emotionless expressions on their faces. I could feel my own face settling into its familiar unresponsive set, as if preparing itself to hold back a flood of emotion. "Let's go."
I thought it would rain. At least, my mind told me the echoing noise was thunder, but as I emerged from my dream-state I realized someone was knocking on my door. I groaned and pulled the covers over my head, much as Houki had the day before. "Can I never sleep?"
"Hotohori-sama, it's us no da." Chichiri's voice was muted, repressed. I blinked as the remembrance of our task came rushing back to me, waking me further. I stood up quickly, walking over to my closet, and found my "simple" outfit: my practice clothes, the white shirt, red ankle-length tunic, dark pants, and simple boots. The same outfit I'd worn when travelling with Miaka and Nuriko to find the other seishi, all that time ago, and yet not so long. It seemed appropriate to wear it, somehow.
I wrapped my hair into a tail down my back, knelt next to the bed and kissed my sleeping wife on the temple, reluctant to wake her. I hoped she'd remember our talk the night before, about what the four of us would do today, and wouldn't worry when she woke and found me gone. She'd agreed with what we were to do. Houki had known Nuriko somewhat from the harem and had respected "her", even with "her" tendency to keep "herself" separated from the other members. She agreed it was proper that he be brought back to his own place.
I left her, sleeping gently, to join my friends outside the room. I was slightly taken aback to see a girl who resembled the nyan nyans from Mt. Taikyoku, only older and more in control. I suppose the surprise registered on my face, because she bowed, smiling at me. "Hotohori-sama, my name is Nyan. You know me better as the nyan nyans."
"Nani? You mean, they're all you?"
She nodded, then seemed to notice my clothing, surveying it critically. "It's cold up north. You need something more than that." I noticed Chichiri and Mitsukake, both unusually silent, were wearing thick coats. Nyan closed her eyes and chanted under her breath, holding her arms out in front of her. There was a small flash of pinkish light, and another thick coat dropped into her arms. She held it out to me, and I took it, inspecting it.
It was a deep purple with white trim and a reddish sash. It looked strangely familiar. "Nyan, I think I've seen this before."
"It's like Nuriko's, no da," Chichiri spoke up quietly. "The one he took with him to Hokkan."
I nodded mutely, noticing for the first time the similarity between Chichiri's and Mitsukake's own coats. If I had gone to Hokkan, was this what I would have worn? Would I have been Nuriko's companion when they'd spilt up to search for the shinzaho? I pushed the thoughts out of my mind, feeling the guilt coming back in spades, and shrugged the coat on, belting it tightly. I was immediately much warmer and hoped I could take it off before I roasted to death. "Where to next?"
"Tasuki." The tall healer nodded in the direction of Tasuki's room. "We left him for last to have less of a protest."
"That was wise. Oh, baka!" Ignoring their startled looks about the fact that I had just called myself stupid, I ran back into my room to retrieve something I'd forgotten, and came out wearing my sword, the holy sword Taiitsu-kun had given to me. I might not have had the speed my seishi powers once gave me, but after training with the weapon for thirteen years, I was fairly certain I could still hold my own in a fight. I felt more comfortable having it with me in case anything should happen. If it did, I would be ready.
"GO THE FUCK AWAY ALREADY!" I yelled at my door, yanking my pillow over my head and trying to stuff it in my ears.
"Tasuki no da! Get up and GET OUT HERE!"
"SHIT NO! If that witch can open it this early, she can KEEP it open!"
"TASUKI!" Hotohori joined in. "I don't like it any more than you, but we don't have a choice!"
"I'll get him!" chirped an unfamiliar young female voice. I didn't have time to figure out who it was before there was a flash of pinkish light I could see even through the pillow. And suddenly I was floating five feet in the air above my bed. "Tasuki-san! Time to wake up!"
"YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!" I yelled, looking at the empty space between me and the bed, and flipped over to find that cursed chipper female voice's owner floating in midair next to me with a grin on her face. "YAAAAAAA!!!"
"I think he's awake now," Mitsukake said dryly, opening the door and stepping into my room. "Nyan, you can set him down."
"Hai!" She waved her hand and I fell the five feet to bounce on my bed.
"Why the fuck did you do that?!" I yelled at her. "I need sleep, damnit!"
The grin dropped from her face, and she looked at me seriously. "Do you really want to get Nuriko?"
"Shit yeah, but not this early!"
"This is the only time Taiitsu-kun can send you. Since Seiryu was called, her ability to help you, the Suzaku no shichiseishi, has been greatly reduced. If she sends you at any other time, you will be detected and stopped, and would most likely spin through the space between worlds forever." She kept that direct stare on me. "In other words, you would vanish, never to be heard from again. Now do you understand?"
I squashed my response and simply nodded, hauling myself to my feet. "All right, out, I need to change." The girl vanished in the same pinkish light, and Mitsukake silently left and closed the door. I pulled on the clothes I'd worn the day before, which were the first things that came to hand, then started digging through my things, looking for my coat. It was cold in Hokkan, we'd learned that the hard way last time. In fact... my mouth twisted into an ironic smile as I remembered Nuriko, when we'd first gotten to the country, demanding I make a fire with my tessen, which I had repeatedly refused. In the end, he'd won, of course, and I'd stood there with a scowl on my face, fanning him with the gently burning tessen, him grinning like a little kid. He'd always known how to get what he wanted, he was always the one to complain of the cold first. And he'd been the one to stay there, freezing and bleeding to death in the snow that had seemed so clean… It wasn't right, it just wasn't.
And we were going to fix it. We had to. We wanted to.
I finally found my green coat, shoved in the back corner of a drawer in my dresser, as if I'd tried to hide the memories associated with it by hiding the coat itself. I pulled it on, tightening the sash around my waist, steeling myself for our upcoming task. My tessen was slung in its carrier on my back, the sword I'd been fighting with in the war since I'd lost my powers at my hip. I wouldn't be caught unprepared. I took a deep breath and stepped out of the room, ready to see my lost friend.
The resemblance between Nyan and Chichiri struck me as I watched the girl chant, her hands folded in a prayer sign I knew I'd seen Chichiri use once or twice before, their hair almost the same color, even their facial expressions similar. I couldn't understand what Nyan was saying, but it sounded imperious, reminded me of a tone I myself had used on occasion. We were gathered in the courtyard in front of Tasuki's room, facing away from the sun which was just beginning to break over the horizon, ranged in a line behind the chanting girl. In front of her was a slowly widening hole in the air, a hole that glowed pinkish-blue with her power. It expanded inch by inch until it was tall enough to admit even Mitsukake comfortably, just touching the ground with its bottom edge.
We four watched it with a mixture of awe and apprehension, sadness and determination, steeling ourselves for the crossing and what we would find on the other side. I glanced briefly down the line at my companions, saw the usual masks over Chichiri's and Mitsukake's faces, the grim determination on Tasuki's as his fist opened and closed. I myself was gripping the handle of my sword as a steady link to reality.
Nyan's voice startled me when she spoke, using that same commanding tone in a language we all understood. "Go through quickly, I have to be last or it will close. Hurry!"
We four glanced at each other, and I stepped forward, around Nyan, and slowly pushed my hand through the glowing hole. It didn't feel much different. The air felt a bit thicker than normal, but that was all. I reached in up to my shoulder and sucked in breath as the sudden cold hit my arm from the elbow upwards. The portal had worked. On the other side was the frozen wasteland on Mt. Black. I turned back to my fellow seishi. They were all watching me steadily, waiting for my reaction. I nodded at them, and stepped through entirely.
The freezing wind hit me like a thousand knives as my body was freed from the thick air of the portal. I quickly changed my mind about the coat and pulled it tighter around me, cutting off a bit more of the biting wind. I stepped out of the way to give the others room to come through, taking my first look at the land of Hokkan.
I had never been allowed to journey to the other countries, even before I was the emperor. There was always too great a risk of my being kidnapped, held for ransom, even killed. And once I assumed my duties as emperor, I had been too busy. I had held off the Kutou armies for two years before Miaka came by placing my own troops strategically and always being on guard. What met my eyes as I saw the first thing outside my realm was rocky fields of snow with great boulders sticking randomly through the clean white, and in front of me a great cliff with what seemed to be a closed door in it.
A muffled curse drew my gaze back to the portal, to see Tasuki coming through, rubbing his arms to warm himself. "I forgot how cold it was." He looked around, seeming to remember things I'd never seen. He scowled at the door in the cliff, then turned his gaze to one of the rocks near it, one that was as flat as a wall on the side to us. He slowly walked to it and crouched down, balancing himself on one knee, and ran his fingers over the surface. His eyes closed and his head fell forward to rest against it. He was breathing deeply, as if he was trying not to cry.
I didn't know what to do for him, but my attention was again taken by another figure coming through the portal. Mitsukake showed piece by piece, carrying a bag I knew held tools we'd brought for the mission. His expression grew slightly grimmer and the corners of his mouth quivered, like he was holding back strong emotions. He shook his head slightly and knelt to the side of the portal, opening the bag and digging through it, his face unreadable.
Chichiri came next, with Nyan right behind him. The girl didn't seem to be affected by the cold, and neither did Chichiri. Chichiri silently bowed his head in respect for the deceased, and I copied his action, remembering I had yet to kneel next to the body of my fallen comrade.
A large hand on my shoulder brought me back to the present. I looked up into Mitsukake's emotionally closed eyes. "We need to be quick." He looked to Chichiri and Nyan, as did I. The portal behind them was shrinking as slowly as it had widened. It wouldn't remain open for long.
I took one more look around the white wasteland. Tasuki hadn't moved from his rock. The door drew my attention once again, and I pointed to it. "Is that where...?"
The healer nodded. "The shinzaho." His voice was unusually thick with feeling. I understood. That door was what Nuriko had sacrificed himself to achieve, where Miaka had attained the Genbu shinzaho and met the two Genbu spirits. Miaka had confided that she'd had hopes of Nuriko's spirit remaining with them, as the warriors Hikitsu and Tomite remained in the cave, but that hadn't come to pass. All signs of the fatal fight had been obliterated by the frequent storms that passed through the heights frequently, but I almost thought I could see it in front of me. The wolf-man, the small yet strong warrior, I could almost see their ghosts, fighting to the death in order to live.
"There it is." Chichiri's quiet phrase broke through my imaginings. The last of Nyan's portal vanished, and for the first time I could see the tip of a wooden staff poking through a mound of smooth, white snow. I knew instantly that was where Nuriko was.
A silent figure in green passed by me, walking steadily to the mound, fire-tinted hair a blaze of color against the white. I followed, my head still bowed slightly, ready to see my friend.
The staff we'd used as a marker was nearly buried. I hadn't thought of what two or three month's exposure to snow storms might do to the meager monument we'd been able to leave for him. I silently fell to my knees next to the mound and began to dig with my hands, calmly pushing away the snow, ignoring the bite of cold on my skin, simply determined to get him out of there and back home.
A small shovel was pushed into the snow next to me. I looked up to Mitsukake's towering form, blocking some of the light filtering over the mountain peaks. I thought I saw him give me a small smile, but I couldn't be sure. He had a spade in hand, and he tossed the empty bag away, moving to the other side. I saw Hotohori, the last shovel in his hands, scooping up small heaps of snow and flinging them across the landscape with an almost feverish intensity. Chichiri stood at the head of the mound, his mask removed, his head bowed in prayer, with Nyan beside him in much the same posture. Around the girl, however, there appeared every once in awhile a blue spark of light. I wondered briefly what they were, until the snow began flying near where Mitsukake was. I grabbed the handle of the shovel, stood, and began to dig.
Hold on, buddy, I thought to Nuriko. We'll have you out of there soon, and you can be home again. You can be warm. Eh, never were one for the cold, were you? You can be with us again.
After a few minutes of digging I felt my shovel hit something solid. I felt a sinking suspicion as to what it was, and hurriedly brushed away the snow about a hand span's width from where the shovel had hit. My own reflection, eyes wide and almost panicked, met me. I banged on the surface, but it didn't crack, didn't even shiver.
"Shit. Ice storms," I muttered, then raised my voice. "Have you guys hit it yet?"
A clunk answered me, as well as a muffled curse from Hotohori. "Ice. Why did it have to be ice?"
"We didn't bring any picks," answered Mitsukake's muted voice.
We'd gotten through about two feet of snow. It wasn't packed very hard on the top, and the three of us quickly removed the rest, exposing the dome of ice hiding Nuriko from us. The once smooth snow scape was now littered with clumps of snow that had exploded on impact and our own footprints. Chichiri and Nyan hadn't moved, and the blue sparks were still appearing sporadically. Two and a half feet of the wooden staff were clear before the ice started. I joined Hotohori and Mitsukake, trying to think of a way to get through this quickly.
"I'm out of ideas," Hotohori said simply. He sounded exhausted and wearied, possibly as close to tears as I'd ever heard him. "I can't use my sword to get through this without my seishi powers."
Mitsukake remained silent, his brow furrowed in thought, staring at the grave. Suddenly his eyes widened, and he looked at me. "Tasuki, your tessen."
"Nani? I can't melt this stuff, I don't have my powers either."
The healer shook his head. "No, you can break through the ice with it. It's stronger than anything else we have. Nothing can break diamond, so it should be able to chip through fairly quickly."
I slowly reached behind me and drew the tessen, looking at it doubtfully. It might not break, but how thick was that ice? Any more than a finger's breadth and it would take forever to get through. But still... "I don't know what good it'll do, but I give it a try."
They nodded at me, and took a step back. I treaded forward, holding the tessen like a dagger, trying to find the best possible place to strike. I bent forward, inspecting the ice, and finally found the spot where the snow beneath seemed clearer than anywhere else. I grabbed the hilt of the tessen in both hands and raised it above my head, hearing Hotohori gasp as if remembering something. I closed my eyes and plunged the tessen down as fast as I could, feeling the jolt run through my arms as it connected with the ice.
I opened my eyes. The tip of the tessen was embedded in the ice now, about a third of the way through as far as I could tell. I reversed my grip and yanked it out, then knelt to inspect the hole, brushing away ice chips. A web of cracks radiated through the ice surrounding the hole for a good foot on either side, large near it and gradually getting narrower the further away it was. I stuck my finger in the hole and pulled it out quickly before frostbite could grab it. I really should have remembered gloves. "Looks like it's about three quarters of an inch thick."
I thought I heard Mitsukake... sigh in relief? "That's better than I expected. How far did you get?"
"About a third that far." I stood and again gripped the tessen. "Stay back." Again I raised it above my head and again brought it down. The hole expanded and the cracks raced further away as the ice chips flew. The tessen went in further that time, though still not all the way through. Again I struck, and this time heard the ice crack and shatter, felt the tessen plow into the soft snow beneath at least half a foot. I brushed the powder off the tessen and stuck it back in its carrier, ready to bash through the rest with my shovel.
I heard the snow crunch under booted feet behind me, and a fist shot past me to strike the ice next to the hole I had created. The ice shattered and fell into the snow beneath, other pieces flying away so fast I turned to hide my face. When I looked back I saw the healer next to me, smiling at the mound. "This time," he said softly, "I'm going to do it."
I couldn't break through the ice on my own. I watched as Tasuki repeatedly drove his tessen into the ice, chipping away steadily at the barrier between us and Nuriko, leaving me with a fresh bout of hopelessness. If I was truly strong, I could get through. This time, however, I simply knew that I could not do that. Nuriko was the seishi who would have been able to, Nuriko was trapped lifeless beneath the barrier. But I couldn't sit still either. When he'd broken through, I'd stepped up and simply plowed my fist through the ice, miraculously remaining unharmed by the ice slivers and destroying the shield for a foot on every side. Tasuki protected his face from the flying splinters, and I allowed myself to smile at the mound in front of me. For once I could do something right.
Tasuki clearly didn't know what to make of my statement, but he understood about getting through the ice. He and Hotohori, who had watched all this silently, reclaimed their shovels and took position on either side of me, ready to swing on my command. I said nothing, simply punched again, higher up and nearer to the staff, and they swung with me. We hit in three different places, each destroying more and more of the ice. We fell out of rhythm, each of us hitting wherever and whenever we could, shattering more of the shield each time. I quickly found that even with my long reach I couldn't quite get to the top, and Hotohori took that job from me, using the length of the shovel's handle. We cleared about half the ice in bare minutes, avoiding the head of the mound where Chichiri and Nyan still stood. I assumed Nyan was protecting us from being discovered, but I still wasn't sure what Chichiri was doing. I made sure to stay away from him through, so he wasn't hit by the ice.
A few minutes later most of the ice was gone, except for the section in front of Chichiri and Nyan. My hands had a couple of cuts on them, but they weren't bad. The bleeding had stopped almost as soon as it had begun and my movement wasn't impaired. I grabbed my spade and began to dig again.
I called a halt when there was only two feet of snow from the top of the mound to the ground. "From here on in, we use our hands." Tasuki and Hotohori nodded, throwing aside their shovels, and knelt in the snow to bail out handfuls of the stuff. My spade joined their shovels in the snow, and I began throwing snow over my shoulder. The going was slower than with the shovels, but no one was willing to risk hitting Nuriko's unprotected body. We began on the edges, gradually moving in as we cleared the snow in the way, taking it off the top at the same time. The base of the mound shrunk from about seven feet long and five feet wide very quickly, becoming more Nuriko-sized every minute. And then, we were there.
Hotohori saw him first. His face grew grim as he gently exposed one dark purple sleeve. Tasuki found his left foot, with a slipper of the same dark purple, and the end of a pair of light pink pants. I found the paleness of the bottom of his long shirt. We all bowed our heads momentarily in respect, then began clearing away the rest of the snow quicker than ever.
The familiar jingle was suddenly cut off as Chichiri dropped his staff in the snow and knelt next to me, digging as fast as the rest of us. With four of us the going was faster than ever. It seemed bare moments later we were brushing off the snow from Nuriko's hands, pulling it out of his hair with our fingers.
The cold, for once, had done us a service. The temperature, snow, and ice had preserved Nuriko's body so he looked the same he did his last day alive. His clothes still lay in the same folds they'd been in when he was buried. His purple hair, hacked short by his knife in the tavern in Toulan, fanned out around him, the shaggy cut reminding me of something else. I checked, and the bag with his cut hair still lay with him. His mouth was settled in a small smile. He radiated peace.
I turned away, unable to control myself any longer, a tear slipping silently from my eye. Tasuki passed me as he walked up to Nuriko's head, kneeling next to him. I wiped away the tear and turned back. Hotohori was kneeling across from Tasuki. He had let himself go, crying silently and making no move to stop it. Tasuki was also crying, the same quiet tears he'd cried when Nuriko had first died, when he'd sat against the rock, refusing all comfort. Chichiri seemed to be the only one of us who had kept himself in control, but because of the mask I couldn't be sure.
Tasuki gently pushed one arm under Nuriko and lifted him up, supporting his shoulders. He cradled Nuriko's body against himself, head bent and weeping, the tears dropping onto Nuriko's shirt. Hotohori clasped one of Nuriko's hands in his two, holding it to his forehead, bent over his body much as Tasuki was. The two of them were the most affected by Nuriko's death, possibly because they'd known him longer. Or were they less afraid to show their emotions? I pushed aside the thought and bent my head as Chichiri once again chanted a prayer for the dead over our fallen companion.
The internment was a small, private one.
Tasuki and Hotohori had borne him back to Konan between them, his slight frame draped over the semi-chair their arms had made. Mitsukake followed them, not looking at anyone but Nuriko, a few tears falling unnoticed down his cheeks. Nyan and I were last, again, as we had been last to go. I wanted to look at the place of death once more.
The snow from the mound was strewn everywhere, some of it being picked up by the wind and sent flying, as if to try and convince us another storm was on the way. Shards and chunks of ice were scattered as well, glinting like tiny mirrors in the new morning sunlight. Our tracks of footprints told a confusing story, but would quickly be obliterated by the next storm or strong wind. It was not a place of healing. It was a barren place where life couldn't be sustained. As I looked at that dismal sight, I was gladder than ever that we had decided to take Nuriko from it.
Only six people were at the burial just a little later that morning: Tasuki, Hotohori, Houki, Mitsukake, Nyan, and myself. We hadn't told anyone but Houki what we were planning on doing, and no one had seen us return since Nyan had opened the portal into the seishi garden. Houki had been there, sitting on a bench and staring at her hands, looking sadder than I'd ever seen her. She'd stood when we'd appeared and walked to Hotohori and Tasuki, her gaze never leaving Nuriko. She had fingered the hair of her "twin" gently, looking slightly shocked that he had butchered was had been his prized possession, but her face settled in an expression of understanding, as if she knew better than we did what had been going through his mind.
Tasuki and Hotohori had gently lain him on the ground and taken up their shovels again. Mitsukake's spade had broken the earth next to Chiriko's grave, near the small shrine, and the three of them began to dig a new grave to house a companion's body.
I wanted to help them, but there were no more tools. I stood, leaning heavily on my staff, grateful the mask hid my face and emotions. There was a gentle tap on my shoulder, and I turned to see Nyan, smiling slightly in understanding, holding out a fresh shovel to me. I smiled back at her and took it, setting my things next to the shrine. Then I stepped forward and joined my fellow seishi.
It didn't take us long to clear enough earth for the grave; Nuriko had not been a large person, nor a tall one. The grave was still larger then Chiriko's though.
For a moment I was tempted to refuse to bury him, to keep him above ground where we could always see him, sense his comforting peace. But I knew that was impossible. The cold that had preserved him was gone, and the body would start to deteriorate quickly. At least now we had him near us. It was calming to know that. I could feel myself healing inside, although I would never heal entirely. His and Chiriko's deaths were wounds that could never be fully made right. But they could be soothed.
We placed him in the grave, the garden silent except for the bird song and trickle of water into the pond, an occasional fish breaking the surface. A small gold-tinted butterfly flew around us for a minute, briefly landing on Nuriko's nose. I had to smile. If he'd been alive, he would've done something silly to the poor thing like try to catch it or chase it everywhere, or curse at it happily to make us laugh. That was how we should remember him, the good times, the fun we'd had, and not his stillness in death.
Mitsukake fixed his clothes to lie straight, and folded his arms over his stomach. The six of us knelt on the cleared space on either side of the grave, Hotohori and Tasuki by his head, as I chanted the burial chant loud enough for us to hear, but not loud enough to destroy the peace in the air. Tasuki and Hotohori both reached out to touch his hands one last time, once again crying softly, then turned to help us fill in the grave again.
Shovelful by shovelful, we slowly covered him with the earth that had made way for him. Tasuki and Hotohori paid no attention to their tears, not bothering to wipe them away as we worked. Houki and Nyan wandered off into the garden together, silent as well. We gradually replaced all the earth, leaving a small mound above him roughly the height of Chiriko's. The mound was padded down, packed firmer so none of it would be washed away in a rain. I briefly left them and returned, carrying the reason for my late return.
I held the wooden staff that had marked him in Hokkan in my hands, feeling the rough carving made by Tasuki's knife that spelled him name rub against my palms. It was his marker, and nothing else.
Understanding dawned in the others' eyes as I held it vertically above the mound, over a spot I knew would miss Nuriko and looked at them imploringly. One of us stood on each side of his grave: Tasuki on his right, between him and Chiriko, Hotohori at his head, I on his left, and Mitsukake at his foot. They each reached out and wrapped one had around the staff as well. As one, we pushed it through the newly shoveled earth until it hit solid ground, then packed the dirt around its base to hold it upright. Nyan and Houki returned, carrying two bouquets of fresh flowers, one for Nuriko and one for Chiriko, which they laid on the graves. We stood there, in that peaceful place away from the war, the morning sunlight bathing us with its brightness, and mourned for our friends.
AUTHOR'S NOTES II: Okay, gotta couple things to explain here. First, about Nyan. I found on one of the FY sites I go to a basic description of the nyan nyans that went something like "Taiitsu-kun's helper who can seemingly multiply herself..." You get the picture. It made sense to me. Why deal with several of them when you can have only one? (Spoiler alert here on in on Nyan!) Then in the OVA the Nyan nyan showed up again, except this time it was just ONE girl, and she looked older, talked sensibly, and could do some really cool magic. She even had a chest. So of course in my mind those two conglomerated and I came up with the idea that the one smart older girl (Nyan) split into the many little babbling girls (nyan nyans) as needed.
I really like the nyan nyans and think they're great, but that description just didn't go with the opening of this chapter. *_~
Next, the coat thing. This is something born from my own weird mind. I noticed in episode 33 that everyone except Nuriko had a partner in coat-dom, meaning that two people wore the same or almost the same coat. Chiriko and Miaka both had pink, Tasuki and Tamamhome green, and Chichiri and Mitsukake light purple. Nuriko was the only one without a match, and I came to regard that as foreshadowing: he doesn't have a "twin," he's the one that won't leave (MY NURIKO DIED! WAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!). Does that make sense? Well, I figured that if Hotohori had gone as he wanted to (damn advisors, Nuriko might still be alive if Hotohori went!), he would've been Nuriko's partner in coat-dom. This is all going on the assumption that they brought their coats with them from Konan.
Something really freaky happened while I was writing this. I was in the middle of Tasuki's first section, I'd just gotten to his reflections about Nuriko, when this song came on the radio: Rod Stewart's "Gasoline Alley" (I listen to classic rock while I write most of the time). Nothing of the song sank in until near the end of it, when these lyrics seemed to go slamming into my brain:
"And if I'm called away and it's my turn to go
Should the blood run cold in my veins
Just one favor I'll be asking of you
Don't bury me here, it's too cold
Take me back, carry me back"
Freaky, huh? Don't they fit Nuriko's view for this story? The rest of the song doesn't, I looked up the lyrics (which is how I got that excerpt, hee hee!), but that one little section... and having THAT section be the one that caught my attention... It was weird. But cool.
Wow. Those're some LONG notes.
And remember, this is NOT the end of the story! No way, no how, NOT THE END! I still got plans! See ya next chapter!
