AN: Why am I posting these, you may ask? Well, they're prequels of a sort to an ACTUALLY GOOD story I wrote.. *g* Bear with me, will yeh?
Plague! THE SEQUEL!
SCENE ONE:
LONDON, ENGLAND
MAD SCIENTIST'S LAB
(Mad Scientist is an old guy with white hair. Looks like Einstein. MS is hurriedly rushing around lab, laughing evilly)
MAD SCIENTIST: Muahahaha!!!! My work of horror is almost complete! Soon I will have the power to depopulate the whole world! Even myself, but I'll fix that later.
(MS runs to cryofreezer and takes out small box. Inside is a frozen tick)
MS: This is the last tick in the world that carries the bubonic plague!! Once I add the tick to this mixture, the plague will be ready!
(Doorbell rings. MS offhandedly throws tick in general direction of mixture, but misses it by an inch)
SCENE TWO
DIANA FOWLEY'S APARTMENT
SOMETIME IN NOON
(The Fowl One is sitting at her Discount K-Mart computer looking through a web page. Suddenly, she jumps up and gasps aloud)
TFO: Gasp! A mutated virus of the bubonic plague has been found in England! Horror! Wait! I know! I'll use this as bait so Mulder will have to help me! And he'll have to leave that annoying Dana Scully behind. Heh heh. Then I'll have him all to myself!
(runs over to phone and dials Mulder's number)
SCENE THREE
THE X-FILES OFFICE
SOMETIME AROUND 3:00 AM
(Mulder is sitting at his desk throwing pencils at the ceiling. He is waiting for an important call)
(phone rings, and Mulder hurridley snatches it up)
Mulder: Scully? Is that you??
TFO: No, Mulder, It's me!!
Mulder: (obviously disappointed) Oh.. it's just you. What do you want? I have an important call coming in. This had better be good.
TFO: It is important! I found out that a mutated version of the Bubonic Plague is running amok in London!
Mulder: (disgusted) I don't believe that. Why are you making this up?
TFO: (sad) I'm not! It's true! I need your help on this, Mulder!!
Mulder: (even more disgusted) Sure, sure, whatever. Listen, I have an important call coming in and I'm sure that if it was true, I would have heard about it already. Thank you and goodbye. (hangs up phone)
Mulder: Stupid woman.
SCENE FOUR
LONDON, ENGLAND
TIME: UNKNOWN. TFO DOESN'T WEAR WATCHES.
(TFO is wearing a really tacky purple suit with huge green polka dots on it. She is holding a box and standing on the doorstep of the Mad Scientist's house)
(TFO Knocks)
MS: (opens door) Yeah, what do you want?
TFO:(huge fake smile) Hi, I'm selling Avon Products. Would you be interested in buying this lovely ceramic glow-in-the-dark clown?
MS: Are you sure you're an Avon Salesperson?
TFO: Yeah, why?
MS: Not even an Avon Salesperson would be dressed that tackily. Are you on anything?
TFO: (haughty) What's that supposed to mean??
MS: (quickly) Nothing. Now, why are you really here? You're no Avon Salesperson. Are you after me for that explosion and the deaths of 3,000 people that I tested my new bubonic plague mutation that was mentioned on many webpages that you may have seen?
TFO: What are you saying?
MS: Read between the lines, idiot!! Do you want to see my bubonic plague mutation??
TFO: Uh.. sure.
MS: Right this way.
SCENE FIVE
INSIDE THE LAB
LONDON, ENGLAND
SOMETIME AROUND 3:00 PM
(The MS and TFO are in the small entrance before the cryofreezer.)
MS: (hands TFO plague) Here you go. Don't open it, or you'll die. Call me if you need anything. Okay? Do I need to repeat that? Don't...open... it.... or.....you'll....die. Understand?
TFO: I think so.
MS: (mutters) Idiot. (walks away)
TFO: Now what did he just say?
(looks down at her shoes.)
TFO: Oh well. I'm sure it doesn't matter. Hey, I wonder what will happen when I open this? (opens it) Wow. Pretty neat. Heh heh.. makes me feel lightheaded.. whooo hooo!!
(TFO stupidly dances around the room for a minute, then starts hacking her lungs out.)
TFO: I think I'm *cough* going to *hack* die soon! *wheeze*
(suddenly, TFO dies, and Mulder and Scully enter the room)
Mulder: (has gun and is doing the normal stakeout thing) Freeze! Heh heh, get it Scully? There's a cryofreezer over there and I said Freeze! Ha hahah!
Scully: (winces) I get it Mulder, but it's not funny. (notices Fowley in the corner) Hey look! Fowley's dead!
Mulder: OH YEAH!! (dances around the room, grabs Scully and dances some more)
Scully: Good. There's one more distraction out of our way.
Mulder: Hey, Scully, now we can take that vacation to Bermuda!
Scully: Okay!
And so, Mulder and Scully happily skip off into the sunset, leaving TFO's dead and decaying carcass by the cryofreezer (heh heh).
Plague! THE SEQUEL!
SCENE ONE:
LONDON, ENGLAND
MAD SCIENTIST'S LAB
(Mad Scientist is an old guy with white hair. Looks like Einstein. MS is hurriedly rushing around lab, laughing evilly)
MAD SCIENTIST: Muahahaha!!!! My work of horror is almost complete! Soon I will have the power to depopulate the whole world! Even myself, but I'll fix that later.
(MS runs to cryofreezer and takes out small box. Inside is a frozen tick)
MS: This is the last tick in the world that carries the bubonic plague!! Once I add the tick to this mixture, the plague will be ready!
(Doorbell rings. MS offhandedly throws tick in general direction of mixture, but misses it by an inch)
SCENE TWO
DIANA FOWLEY'S APARTMENT
SOMETIME IN NOON
(The Fowl One is sitting at her Discount K-Mart computer looking through a web page. Suddenly, she jumps up and gasps aloud)
TFO: Gasp! A mutated virus of the bubonic plague has been found in England! Horror! Wait! I know! I'll use this as bait so Mulder will have to help me! And he'll have to leave that annoying Dana Scully behind. Heh heh. Then I'll have him all to myself!
(runs over to phone and dials Mulder's number)
SCENE THREE
THE X-FILES OFFICE
SOMETIME AROUND 3:00 AM
(Mulder is sitting at his desk throwing pencils at the ceiling. He is waiting for an important call)
(phone rings, and Mulder hurridley snatches it up)
Mulder: Scully? Is that you??
TFO: No, Mulder, It's me!!
Mulder: (obviously disappointed) Oh.. it's just you. What do you want? I have an important call coming in. This had better be good.
TFO: It is important! I found out that a mutated version of the Bubonic Plague is running amok in London!
Mulder: (disgusted) I don't believe that. Why are you making this up?
TFO: (sad) I'm not! It's true! I need your help on this, Mulder!!
Mulder: (even more disgusted) Sure, sure, whatever. Listen, I have an important call coming in and I'm sure that if it was true, I would have heard about it already. Thank you and goodbye. (hangs up phone)
Mulder: Stupid woman.
SCENE FOUR
LONDON, ENGLAND
TIME: UNKNOWN. TFO DOESN'T WEAR WATCHES.
(TFO is wearing a really tacky purple suit with huge green polka dots on it. She is holding a box and standing on the doorstep of the Mad Scientist's house)
(TFO Knocks)
MS: (opens door) Yeah, what do you want?
TFO:(huge fake smile) Hi, I'm selling Avon Products. Would you be interested in buying this lovely ceramic glow-in-the-dark clown?
MS: Are you sure you're an Avon Salesperson?
TFO: Yeah, why?
MS: Not even an Avon Salesperson would be dressed that tackily. Are you on anything?
TFO: (haughty) What's that supposed to mean??
MS: (quickly) Nothing. Now, why are you really here? You're no Avon Salesperson. Are you after me for that explosion and the deaths of 3,000 people that I tested my new bubonic plague mutation that was mentioned on many webpages that you may have seen?
TFO: What are you saying?
MS: Read between the lines, idiot!! Do you want to see my bubonic plague mutation??
TFO: Uh.. sure.
MS: Right this way.
SCENE FIVE
INSIDE THE LAB
LONDON, ENGLAND
SOMETIME AROUND 3:00 PM
(The MS and TFO are in the small entrance before the cryofreezer.)
MS: (hands TFO plague) Here you go. Don't open it, or you'll die. Call me if you need anything. Okay? Do I need to repeat that? Don't...open... it.... or.....you'll....die. Understand?
TFO: I think so.
MS: (mutters) Idiot. (walks away)
TFO: Now what did he just say?
(looks down at her shoes.)
TFO: Oh well. I'm sure it doesn't matter. Hey, I wonder what will happen when I open this? (opens it) Wow. Pretty neat. Heh heh.. makes me feel lightheaded.. whooo hooo!!
(TFO stupidly dances around the room for a minute, then starts hacking her lungs out.)
TFO: I think I'm *cough* going to *hack* die soon! *wheeze*
(suddenly, TFO dies, and Mulder and Scully enter the room)
Mulder: (has gun and is doing the normal stakeout thing) Freeze! Heh heh, get it Scully? There's a cryofreezer over there and I said Freeze! Ha hahah!
Scully: (winces) I get it Mulder, but it's not funny. (notices Fowley in the corner) Hey look! Fowley's dead!
Mulder: OH YEAH!! (dances around the room, grabs Scully and dances some more)
Scully: Good. There's one more distraction out of our way.
Mulder: Hey, Scully, now we can take that vacation to Bermuda!
Scully: Okay!
And so, Mulder and Scully happily skip off into the sunset, leaving TFO's dead and decaying carcass by the cryofreezer (heh heh).
