D.D.:  Right people, first and foremost, I want to wish everyone, no matter who you are, a very merry Christmas! Oh and so do the G-boys…*indicates pilots*

Duo: I don't know why we have to wear these stupid hats…

Heero: Or this tinsel…

Wufei: OR THIS SKIRT!!!!

D.D.: *tries to hold back giggles* It's just part of the festive season…so, let's get on with this shall we? It's the last chapter there is folks, but all the thankyous will be in the epilogue. (No 1+2 epilogue so for those non yaoi lovers, you're ok! However if people DO want an alternative epilogue, you have but to ask! ^_^)

"No, NO!" A voice snapped from down the corridor, "You have to act the part perfectly…"

A loud mutter issued from behind the closed wooden door, "But I don't want to act this perfectly…it's humiliating enough taking lessons from an onna…without having to act the part as well!"

"Deal with it." The first voice snapped, obviously fed up to the back teeth with the second voice, "He wants you as a female on Christmas day, so tough luck."

"All this for a little child…it is an injustice!" The second voice took on an almost wheedling quality, "Come on Sally, it's really late…you don't want to be here any more than me."

"No, you have to get this right." Sally sounded firm now, "All we have to do now is something about your hair."

Wufei let out a loud scream as Sally advanced towards him, holding a pair of curling tongs and a bottle of hair dye. "Oh no you don't onna! I refuse to have my hair dyed."

"Then you must at least wear a wig." Sally snapped, shoving the offending item on poor Wufei's head, "And the trousers have to go, you'll wear this." She held up a pink skirt and top, so I suggest you put them on so you can get used to wearing them."

"Fine." Wufei sounded not only furious but upset as well, "But turn around while I put them on, I'm not going to have an onna watching me get dressed." Before he could reach for the pink garment however, he was rewarded with a sound slap around the side of his head. "OW! What did you do that for?!"

"Enough with the 'onna'," Sally said firmly, "I have a name, use it."

"Fine." Wufei said again, before successfully retrieving the garments, it was going to be a long night.

*****************

"SNOW!!"

That was the first noise Heero heard; it rudely jolted him out of a deep sleep, mumbling under his breath about, "stupid little braided bakas…" he opened his eyes.

Duo was bouncing on the end of the bed excitedly peering out of the window, face pressed against the glass and violet eyes wide. Turning he noticed Heero glaring at him, "Look Heero, SNOW!" He yelled again, jumping up and down again, before bouncing off the mattress and towards the door.

Heero was rather glad of this, the bouncing had been making him feel sick. "Duo? Where are you going?" He managed, just as the small boy headed out of the door. A head poked back around.

"I'm going out to play in the snow Heero, coming?"

"But what about all your presents…" Heero trailed off, wrapping paper lay scattered everywhere, obviously having been ripped off in a great hurry.

"I've already opened them silly!" Duo's whole body bounced back into the room again. "See, I got a soldier and some paint and some hair ties and some more paint and look at this?" He indicated an object in the corner, "My own sledge!"

I wonder how much Quatre had to fork out for that? Heero thought to himself, the sledge was painted a gleaming black with just enough room for two fully-grown people to sit on. Must have been a lot. He decided, before another bounce on the mattress brought his attention back down again.

"Come and play with me Heero?" Violet eyes pleaded out of an innocent looking face.

"Uh…"

"PLEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAASSSSEEE Heero?" Duo begged, bouncing up and down for more emphasis on the loud begging.

Heero turned faintly green as the bed continued to bump and sway slightly, "Fine." He said shortly through clenched teeth, "But I'm not riding on the sledge, and you're having breakfast first."

His reward for having reluctantly giving in was a loud whoop and then something warm and decidedly Duo hit his chest, gave him a big bear hug and jumped off again to run shrieking down the halls, "Quatre? Quatre? I want breakfast quickly! Heero said he'd play with me in the snoooooow…" The voice faded off into the distance as Duo entered the kitchen.

Sighing, Heero got up, another morning, another day of the chibi Duo, another day of play…

Smiling the perfect soldier proceeded to slip into something a bit warmer than his usual outfit. [1]

**************

When Heero entered the kitchen Duo was wolfing down a plate of eggs and bacon, Quatre was standing in front of the oven, frying more bacon and Trowa was leaning against the counter watching him.

Sitting down at the table Heero poured some cereal into a bowl before realising that the fifth and final member of the group had not appeared yet. Hmm, maybe he's still sore about the knockout last night. Heero thought, an uncharacteristic grin lighting his features for a moment before being wiped away.

Quatre turned around and placed the bacon he had just been frying in front of Wufei's empty chair, before he too realised that the pony-tailed dealer of justice was not there. "Hey, where's Wufei?" He wondered out loud, before turning to Trowa, "You don't think he's backed out of it do you…" He paused, turning around again as he realised that the other two occupants of the room were listening with great interest. Well, that's not entirely accurate, one was listening, the other was eating as fast as possible and listening.

"Eheh…so, who want more bacon?" Quatre said lightly, moving as fast as possible towards the fridge on the other side of the room, "We've got plenty…" His voice became muffled as his head disappeared inside the chilled recesses.

An indignant cough brought all four of the rooms occupant's eyes towards the doorway, where there stood…a girl? 

A pink skirt came down to just above her knees, ending in a little frill, pink earrings dangled from small ears and a pink blouse complimented the whole outfit. It would have made even Relena wince. Black hair swung down as the girl moved further into the room, wobbling slightly on high heels.

A muffled squeak came from Quatre and the girl glanced sharply over towards him. The blonde was in absolute hysterics, clutching onto Trowa he was struggling to stand up he was laughing so much. Trowa was also smiling as he supported the shorter boy. Heero on the other hand was staring in some kind of shock,  how the hell did he manage this? He wondered, eyes riveted to the glaring girl.

Duo however was not restricted by a manic attack of the giggles, nor of shock, so the five year old jumped down from the table and walked over to the pink figure. "Wow…" He sounded awed as he looked at 'Wufei,' "Father Christmas really can do everything…you were Wufei right?"

Despite the fact that the girl would obviously have difficulty speaking through clenched teeth, she managed a quick "Yes."

"Hm…Duo studied her, "You really DO look female," He eventually said, after a long pause, "So what's your new name."

"Wu…Wufelina."

That was it for Quatre, he really could not help himself, up until then, it had just been giggles, as soon as he heard Wufei's new name, the giggles turned into loud snorts, quickly followed by loud shouts and gasps of laughter, even Trowa was now laughing. Heero was leaning weakly against the table as he gasped for air and tried to calm himself.

Wufei glared at them all before turning on his heel to stalk out, however he did not get very far, as he spun, the heel of his shoe snapped off, sending him sprawling on the floor. His skirt flew up as he fell, and due to the length, effectively covered his head.

All four boys howled with laughter at the sight.

"Wufei…nice knickers!" Trowa managed as he leant on Quatre for support.

"Y…yeah…I especially love the hearts." Heero managed.

His face scarlet, Wufei stood up and stomped out of the room, angrily muttering to himself about "trying and trying and this is the thanks I get…" His injured muttering faded into the distance as he stormed towards the other end of the house.

Duo giggled again, before turning to Heero, "Well?" He demanded, "Are we going outside or not?"

*************

Wufei stormed down the corridor towards his room, face a brilliant shade of red as his mind went over and over the humiliation of five minutes earlier. He couldn't believe even Yuy had laughed at him like that, oh the injustice. It seemed that a bit of Duo was rubbing off on everyone.

"I never thought I'd say this." He muttered to no one in particular, "But I think I preferred Maxwell as a teenager, I can't take much more of a manic five year old…" He briefly considered asking Howard for a chemical that would turn Duo into a bug, or better yet a particle. However, he wasn't sure if such chemicals existed, or, (as they were made by Howard) if they'd even work.

Coming to a halt outside his room, Wufei's eyes narrowed in suspicion, his door, which had been closed very firmly when he'd left earlier that morning to run through his 'feminine act' with Sally one more time, was now slightly ajar. Not much, but enough to indicate someone had been in there, and Wufei had the horrible sinking sensation in the pit of his stomach, that he knew who it was.

"Maxwell." He hissed to himself, "What kind of havoc has he wreaked this time?" Cautiously laying a hand on the knob, he stuck his head around the door, nothing was wrong, the room seemed fine, nothing was smashed, and everything was in order…

Placing another tentative hand on the doorknob Wufei pushed the door open a bit more. The only warning he had that something was amiss, was a small grating sound, looking up, his eyes widened in absolute horror as he watched a tin descend towards him in almost slow motion.

Black paint flew everywhere, splattering walls, the ceiling, the carpet and of course, Wufei, who had the misfortune to be standing right underneath. With a loud clang, the paint pot dropped right over his head.

The only visible part of Wufei's head, was his chin, which poked out from under the rim of the can. A few loud Chinese curses were heard as black rivulets ran down the back of his neck and dripped down his front. Other than that, there was dead silence.

Wufei was furious, no wait, scratch that, he was beyond furious, his face was covered in paint (when he eventually thought to remover the pot from his head) his clothes were covered (alright they were pink so it didn't matter, but it was the principle that counted) and the worst thing of all, was the fact that his beautiful hair was coloured black, it would show terribly if he couldn't get it out! (O_0; Uh…hope you get the gag, it's a really lame one but still.)

"That is it." He fumed, "I'm going to Howard right now to get an antidote for that pill he took." And with that dire threat, Chang Wufei stormed off down the corridor…dripping paint all over the nice new carpets Quatre had installed.

*************

Two breathless boys tumbled in the front door and into the kitchen at Quatre's yell that dinner was ready, both rosy cheeked and covered in a pure white snow. Duo was laughing his head off, and occasionally trying to tickle Heero, who kept dancing out of reach with considerable ease. Dodging the nimble fingers for a third time he turned to Quatre grinning.

"Hey, Quatre…as it's Christmas and the dinner's not until this evening, can we eat in the living room?"

"Sure." Quatre handed Duo a glass of milk before turning to Heero, "Why not?"

Wufei entered the kitchen at this point, saw the other four boys and glared sullenly for a moment. After about five minutes, he must've got bored of being ignored though, as he turned around and walked out.

"Thankyou!" Heero beamed before grabbing Duo's hand, "Come on then, to the living room!"

Speechless at the happy smile Quatre could only blink, his mouth open slightly, as the two boys bounced out of the kitchen. As the door closed behind them, he turned to an equally shocked Trowa. "Ok, have you ever seen Heero like that before?"

Trowa shook his head in a negative response, "He's usually never happy unless he's blowing mobile dolls to bits, what's gotten into him?" He blinked, shaking his head again. "It's almost scary."

Quatre nodded in agreement before placing two plates of sandwiches on a tray and carrying them towards the living room. As he approached it however, the sound of voices indicated the TV was on, and peering around the door, the tray still balanced perfectly on one arm, he came across a sight that up until six weeks ago, would've been considered odd.

Heero was stretched out on a rug, close to the fire, dark strands of hair glittering in the flickering light, eyes closed peacefully against the heat and breathing deeply. Lying beside him, curled up next to him, one arm tucked around Heero's, Duo slept too, chestnut braid falling limply over one shoulder.

"Well I guess they won't want this then." Quatre muttered to no one in particular, "I hope Trowa will eat seconds after all the sandwiches I've made."

Smiling the blonde boy quietly closed the door and went to tell the banged one not to go into the living room unless he fancied facing Heero's gun when he woke them up.

*************

Warmth, he was so warm, nice and warm…he'd never felt this comfortable in his life. That was Heero's first reaction on waking, the second was of course to open his eyes, all the orbs came into focus on however was masses and masses of chestnut hair, waves of it, piled everywhere, most of it covering him. Funny, he thought fuzzily, I'll have to take Duo to the hairdressers, I don't remember his hair being this long for a little guy…

Rolling over onto his side and shifting the hair slightly, he nearly jumped to his feet at the face in front of him. The once child like face had been replaced, instead of a soft peaceful five year olds face he was watching a fuller version, older, it looked like a face that had seen pain, it no longer looked innocent.

Heero swallowed hard as he shifted slightly, trying to move away and hide his secret disappointment and sadness.

Duo was Duo again, no longer a happy bouncing angel life, but an angel of death, one who had experienced as much pain as him, perhaps more, and Heero could no longer protect that innocence.

He could not shift far however, Duo may be older, but he was still clinging to Heero like the small child he was once. One arm wrapped around his neck, and as he tried to move again, the arm tightened and Duo buried his face in the crook of Heero's neck, muttering something.

At that moment in time, Trowa stuck his head around the door to wake the two boys up, on the order of Quatre and gave a quiet gasp as he saw Duo.

That was all it took to wake the boy up, shooting to his feet, hair flying everywhere, Duo tried to reach for a gun…that wasn't there. Sleepy eyes blinked a couple of times before he managed to wake up fully, violet eyes looked at the two boys in the room with him.

"Where am I?" Duo may have looked awake, but his voice betrayed the fact he was still waking up properly. "How'd I get down here?" he asked, questioningly glancing at Heero, "Hey! My headache's gone!" He muttered to no one in particular, before walking towards the door, "Is there anything to eat? I'm starved and you two," Here he glanced back at the gob smacked boys, "Can explain why I'm down here."

***********

"Uh…Howard?" Quatre knocked on the mechanics door a second time, "Howard there's good news!"

"What is it?" a head poked out around the door, sunglasses back and intact. "I'm very busy here Quatre, so make it quick please." Howard did indeed look slightly impatient, however it was a small blessing he wasn't holding a smoking vial of some sort.

"Duo's turned back!" Quatre announced cheerfully, smiling at the grey-haired scientist, "So you won't have to find an antidote."

"Well of course he's turned back." Howard said, as though this was common knowledge, "I turned him back didn't I?"

"WHAT!" Shrieked Quatre, eyes widening slightly as he glared at Howard, "When did you find the antidote and administer it to him!?"

Howard shrugged slightly, "Turns out I had it all along, I found it five days ago, but figured if you boys wanted him turned back, you would've said, it wasn't until Wufei came along and offered to put it in his glass of milk earlier this morning that I realised at least one of you was not happy with a five year old Maxwell." Howard blinked again and stared at Quatre, "is that all you wanted young man?"  

"Yes…" Quatre started to say, but got no further, he sniffed, "Can you smell something burning?" He asked cautiously.

"Aaaah!" Howard yelped, "My mango and chutney sorbet!" And with that he slammed the door in poor Quatre's face.

Blinking the blonde haired boy wrinkled his nose, "Mango and chutney?" He shuddered slightly, "I wonder if Howard realises sorbet's not meant to be cooked?" He muttered to himself, "Oh well, let's hope he doesn't poison himself." [2]

***************

"Exactly why won't you tell me how I came to be downstairs, without a headache and have apparently regained consciousness over six weeks later?" Duo asked, glaring across the table at a nervous Trowa and impassive Heero, "Is it a secret that terrible?" He grinned slightly, to show he didn't think it was.

Trowa shifted uncomfortably in his seat under the scrutiny of drilling violet eyes. "I've told you before Duo, if we explained, you just wouldn't believe it."

"Hmph!" Duo pouted and sunk lower in the kitchen chair, just as Quatre re-entered the room. "Hey Q-man! What's up?"

Quatre shrugged, having come up with the theory on the way back to the kitchen; that it would be better to act like nothing out of the ordinary had ever occurred over the past six weeks. "Not a lot Duo, Wufei got a bucket of black paint dumped on him today, that's about all really."

Duo grinned, "I have to meet the master mind behind that one someday, do you know who did it?"

Quatre was about to open his mouth and reply when Heero cut in. "No." He said abruptly, "We don't." Having efficiently conveyed to the others in the short sentence he allowed to escape his lips, that Duo was not to be told he had been 'chibified' he got up and stalked out of the room.

As he walked down the corridor, he heard Duo's voice echo behind him, "Man, what's eating him today, you'd think he'd lighten up a bit, it being Christmas and all…"

Heero stopped as though he had been shot, how the hell had Duo known it was Christmas? No one had told him, he himself had made sure of that, staying in the same room as the boy the whole time. It was odd…but still.

Shaking his head, Heero moved on, the perfect soldier was back, fun was a distraction and so was one Duo Maxwell. Nothing more needed to be said really.

Soon the clacking of keys could be heard from the shared room down the hallway and the quiet hum of a piece of machinery operating at full power, no one dared disturb Heero, no one that is…except Duo, who stuck his head around the door almost immediately.

"Hey Heero? What's wrong?"

The clacking of the keys never paused for a moment as Heero replied in monotone. "Nothing."

"Oh that's good because I was kinda getting worried out here man, you know, you seemed a bit upset about something…" Duo trailed off for a split second before he started up again, this time, sounding rather more anxious, "Heero? Heero what's that!?" His voice rose to a shriek on the last sentence, and Heero, caught of guard, spun around on his chair, making one of the biggest mistakes of his life.

Splat.

That's the only word to describe it, and 'splat' is pretty much what it sounded like, even to Heero's furious mind, the 'splat' was pretty final sounding. Wiping the shaving cream out of his eyes he glared at the laughing Duo.

"Oh my god, I didn't think you'd fall for that one Hee-man, that's the oldest trick in the book." Duo stopped, unable to go on as he dissolved into more giggles at the sight of Heero, his entire face and part of his body, covered in the white foam. "Oh boy," He said at last, wiping the tears from his face, "that was funny." Bending over slightly, he clutched his side, "Ow, stitch."

"Are you alright?" Heero's question shocked him, since when did Heero worry about his safety?

"Yeah, I'm fine." He waved a hand slightly.

"Good."

Duo suddenly had an uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach, something was not right, here, defiantly not right at all… "Why?"

"Because I'm going to kill you!" Heero lunged at Duo, vengeance written all over his shaving foam splattered face.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!" Duo screamed, before dodging Heero and hurtling out of the room at full pelt towards the living room where the other three pilots were sitting, Wufei minus his feminine clothes and Quatre and Trowa quietly talking.

Bursting in he vaulted over the back of the sofa and an indignant Wufei before hiding behind it, just as Heero ran headlong into the room, panting only slightly and looking around with an angry stare. "Where is he?" He growled, glaring at Quatre.

"Where's who?" Quatre asked blankly, then looked at the armchair, "Ooooh, you mean Duo, he's behind the armchair."

A muffled yelp followed this revelation and Duo darted out from behind the said piece of furniture, "Don't kill me Heero! I promise not to do it again!" He pleaded, but received no reassurance when he looked into cobalt eyes, the only emotion shown there was deadly intent. Realising he had no alternative, Duo gave up and ran from the room again, Heero following closely, for about half an hour after that, the house rang with muffled screams and curses as Duo was pursued around the safehouse.

Howard barred his door, Quatre and Trowa retreated to their room and put on earmuffs and Wufei swallowed three aspirins, begged Howard for some anaesthetic just before the scientists door closed, knocked himself unconscious and lay blissfully unaware for the next uh…five days.

Life was back to normal again.

THE END

D.D.: Eheh…Sorry it's not a very funny or happy ending, but that's how I wanted it to stop.

Duo: Why is it so bad that I'm ME again? I'm not that evil you know, I can be pleasant.

Wufei: This is true, you can sometimes.

Duo: *glare*

Heero: So that's it?

D.D.: Yup, that is it. But you MUST read the epilogue people, no worries, there's no 1+2 unless (I say again) people want an alternate epilogue too. The epilogue makes the situation a lot happier and really rounds the story off nicely ok? So don't be depressed! Ja Ne!

[1] I'm sure we all know what I mean, spandex, green tank top, trainers etc.

[2] For those of you that don't know what sorbet is, it is a kind of mushed fruit ice thing. You mush all the fruit together and freeze it and it comes out as a sort of fruit crush.