Disclaimer: Not mine.
~Chapter 3~
The trip to Arkansas was at night, everyone was asleep, and nothing really happened. In other words, it's not worth writing about. But when they got off the plane was when things started happening again. Zaphod, being really excited about the Stink Shoes of the Universe, asked the first person who walked by if the knew if anyone had the key to the unprobability field.
"I don't know what the heck you're talking about, man, but you should probably talk to the governer about it," she said. She stood and stared for about five seconds, then freaked out and ran. Fast.
"What was that all about?" Zaphod asked.
"Gee, I don't know," replied Arthur sarcastically. "Maybe it's your second head and third arm! Speaking of heads, mine really hurts!"
"Mine does too," said Ford and Zaphod's two heads in unison.
Luckily, the governer's mansion was within walking distance (wow, how convenient, huh?). When they got there, he wasn't there but his wife was.
"Sorry, Bill's out right now, but I might be able to help you. What do you need?" she asked. Of course, that was before she saw Zaphod. When she did, though, she passed out for a few seconds before she was able to say anything.
"What the heck are you, anyway?" she asked after regaining conciousness.
"That's not important; we'll explain it to you later," the famous lie in this fanfic. "What we need to know is...hey! Bill Clinton! Isn't he addicted to..." Ford was interrupted by a sharp nudge in the ribs by Arthur. "Ouch! Man, what'd you do that for?"
Ignoring Ford, Arthur said, "What he means is to watch out for him, because he'll have some affairs. Trust me, I'm from the future. I just now discovered that we got knocked out of time by a black-hole. I say getting a divorce is the best thing for both of you."
"Well, those are the things that upset me!" exclaimed Zaphod. "As president of the galaxy, I should know that the presidents before me, as well as myself, go to *professionals* like Eccentrica Gallumbits for that kinda of thing--but I can assure you that we DO NOT have affairs."
"Uh, maybe we should get back on the subject of what's going on," said Arthur. "We need to know if anyone in this state has the key to the unprobability field."
"The...what?" Hillary Clinton asked.
"Nevermind. You'd know of it if anyone had it. That's all we needed to know. Bye!" Arthur said. The three walked out of the building, leaving Hillary totally confused.
"Wait! The Heart of Gold's gone!" Ford cried. "We're stranded on this stupid planet!"
"Whadya mean stupid?" asked Arthur defensively.
Breaking the argument up, Zaphod called, "Hey Ford, remember when we thought we'd lost the ship and it was in my pocket? Well, you know that lump in my sock I've been complaining about?"
"Like I could forget..." mumbled Ford, a bit annoyed.
"Like I was saying, before I was so RUDELY interrupted, I think this might be the starship!"
Ford and Arthur plugged their noses as Zaphod removed a small metal object from his sock. The shrunken Heart of Gold started expanding slowly. When it reached its full size the three got on it, unaware of the gawking crowd that was forming.
~Chapter 3~
The trip to Arkansas was at night, everyone was asleep, and nothing really happened. In other words, it's not worth writing about. But when they got off the plane was when things started happening again. Zaphod, being really excited about the Stink Shoes of the Universe, asked the first person who walked by if the knew if anyone had the key to the unprobability field.
"I don't know what the heck you're talking about, man, but you should probably talk to the governer about it," she said. She stood and stared for about five seconds, then freaked out and ran. Fast.
"What was that all about?" Zaphod asked.
"Gee, I don't know," replied Arthur sarcastically. "Maybe it's your second head and third arm! Speaking of heads, mine really hurts!"
"Mine does too," said Ford and Zaphod's two heads in unison.
Luckily, the governer's mansion was within walking distance (wow, how convenient, huh?). When they got there, he wasn't there but his wife was.
"Sorry, Bill's out right now, but I might be able to help you. What do you need?" she asked. Of course, that was before she saw Zaphod. When she did, though, she passed out for a few seconds before she was able to say anything.
"What the heck are you, anyway?" she asked after regaining conciousness.
"That's not important; we'll explain it to you later," the famous lie in this fanfic. "What we need to know is...hey! Bill Clinton! Isn't he addicted to..." Ford was interrupted by a sharp nudge in the ribs by Arthur. "Ouch! Man, what'd you do that for?"
Ignoring Ford, Arthur said, "What he means is to watch out for him, because he'll have some affairs. Trust me, I'm from the future. I just now discovered that we got knocked out of time by a black-hole. I say getting a divorce is the best thing for both of you."
"Well, those are the things that upset me!" exclaimed Zaphod. "As president of the galaxy, I should know that the presidents before me, as well as myself, go to *professionals* like Eccentrica Gallumbits for that kinda of thing--but I can assure you that we DO NOT have affairs."
"Uh, maybe we should get back on the subject of what's going on," said Arthur. "We need to know if anyone in this state has the key to the unprobability field."
"The...what?" Hillary Clinton asked.
"Nevermind. You'd know of it if anyone had it. That's all we needed to know. Bye!" Arthur said. The three walked out of the building, leaving Hillary totally confused.
"Wait! The Heart of Gold's gone!" Ford cried. "We're stranded on this stupid planet!"
"Whadya mean stupid?" asked Arthur defensively.
Breaking the argument up, Zaphod called, "Hey Ford, remember when we thought we'd lost the ship and it was in my pocket? Well, you know that lump in my sock I've been complaining about?"
"Like I could forget..." mumbled Ford, a bit annoyed.
"Like I was saying, before I was so RUDELY interrupted, I think this might be the starship!"
Ford and Arthur plugged their noses as Zaphod removed a small metal object from his sock. The shrunken Heart of Gold started expanding slowly. When it reached its full size the three got on it, unaware of the gawking crowd that was forming.
