Author's Note: Thanks to Obi-thias (for reviewing 6 times as a matter of
fact), Wings of Faith, Twinkle, Wildwolf, reiko-chan, bunnyb, and Hello.
Most sincere thanks to all of you.
Chapter 7: The Council of Elrond
The Fellowship had traveled through many trials together. They had called Captain Planet to destroy the ring, rescued Gandalf from Isengard, been captured by Kitty warriors in the forests of Briské where they had met the elven queen Catalina. She had given them a choice: find an extremely good- looking, powerful, and stupid King willing to marry her, and a passion fruit within the next month or she would spread her shadow over all of Middle Earth. The Fellowship had broken. Frodo, Sam, and Aragorn had gone to reclaim the throne of Gondor, and the others followed Gandalf.
"Where are we going, Gandalf?" asked Legolas.
"To Rivendell, to seek the counsel of Lord Elrond," replied Gandalf, "to get there more quickly, we must take the Paths of the Dead."
"No." said Gimli.
"Come on, please?"
"No."
"All right then, can we at least steal something to ride there?"
"Okay."
So Gandalf the Grey, Legolas son of Thranduil and prince of Mirkwood, Mercedes the Spanish-speaking elf of Briské, Fluffy the captain of the Kitty archers, and Gimli. . . just Gimli took the subway to Rohan where they stole dune buggies and rode to Rivendell.
"Welcome all," said Lord Elrond, "Congratulations on destroying the Ring so early in the story."
"Thanks," said Legolas and Gimli.
"We have come on a quest," said Gandalf, "we must find a passion fruit."
"Interesting," said Elrond pensively, "let me call a council of the free peoples of Middle Earth to determine how best to find a passion fruit." So the Fellowship waited in Rivendell for two weeks while representatives from every race came to Rivendell to discuss the new threat of the Queen Catalina.
"Okay," said Elrond when they were all assembled at a secret meeting, "we have a problem. Queen Catalina, the leader of the very powerful Spanish- speaking elves, has threatened to conquer the world and make it evil. Aragorn has reclaimed his throne in Gondor, but there are no passion fruit anywhere in Middle Earth as the other members of the Fellowship have eaten the last ones in existence while I was waiting to call this council. I suggest we all run in circles panicking." This is what they did.
"Wait a minute!" screamed Legolas over the panicking, "Sit down!"
"What do you want?" asked Elrond, "the world is doomed."
"If there were no passion fruits anywhere in the world, why did we wait two weeks to call this secret meeting? Couldn't you just tell us?"
"It makes a better story this way," said Elrond. Gandalf smiled his approval.
"Instead of panicking," said Mercedes, "why don't you tell us where we can find an Internet-ready computer so we can order a passion fruit online."
"Well," thought Elrond to himself, "I have one in my house, but. . ."
"There is an Internet-ready computer," said Elrond aloud to the Council, "it is deep within the caves of Moria. None have ever been able to use it, for it is defended by a demon of the ancient world."
"Excellent," said Gandalf, "we'll go to Moria."
To Be Continued
Legolas travels to Moria. Some other people go too, but Legolas is all that matters, isn't he?
Thanks to all the people who have reviewed, I will no longer beg. I will rely on the good hearts of the readers.
Chapter 7: The Council of Elrond
The Fellowship had traveled through many trials together. They had called Captain Planet to destroy the ring, rescued Gandalf from Isengard, been captured by Kitty warriors in the forests of Briské where they had met the elven queen Catalina. She had given them a choice: find an extremely good- looking, powerful, and stupid King willing to marry her, and a passion fruit within the next month or she would spread her shadow over all of Middle Earth. The Fellowship had broken. Frodo, Sam, and Aragorn had gone to reclaim the throne of Gondor, and the others followed Gandalf.
"Where are we going, Gandalf?" asked Legolas.
"To Rivendell, to seek the counsel of Lord Elrond," replied Gandalf, "to get there more quickly, we must take the Paths of the Dead."
"No." said Gimli.
"Come on, please?"
"No."
"All right then, can we at least steal something to ride there?"
"Okay."
So Gandalf the Grey, Legolas son of Thranduil and prince of Mirkwood, Mercedes the Spanish-speaking elf of Briské, Fluffy the captain of the Kitty archers, and Gimli. . . just Gimli took the subway to Rohan where they stole dune buggies and rode to Rivendell.
"Welcome all," said Lord Elrond, "Congratulations on destroying the Ring so early in the story."
"Thanks," said Legolas and Gimli.
"We have come on a quest," said Gandalf, "we must find a passion fruit."
"Interesting," said Elrond pensively, "let me call a council of the free peoples of Middle Earth to determine how best to find a passion fruit." So the Fellowship waited in Rivendell for two weeks while representatives from every race came to Rivendell to discuss the new threat of the Queen Catalina.
"Okay," said Elrond when they were all assembled at a secret meeting, "we have a problem. Queen Catalina, the leader of the very powerful Spanish- speaking elves, has threatened to conquer the world and make it evil. Aragorn has reclaimed his throne in Gondor, but there are no passion fruit anywhere in Middle Earth as the other members of the Fellowship have eaten the last ones in existence while I was waiting to call this council. I suggest we all run in circles panicking." This is what they did.
"Wait a minute!" screamed Legolas over the panicking, "Sit down!"
"What do you want?" asked Elrond, "the world is doomed."
"If there were no passion fruits anywhere in the world, why did we wait two weeks to call this secret meeting? Couldn't you just tell us?"
"It makes a better story this way," said Elrond. Gandalf smiled his approval.
"Instead of panicking," said Mercedes, "why don't you tell us where we can find an Internet-ready computer so we can order a passion fruit online."
"Well," thought Elrond to himself, "I have one in my house, but. . ."
"There is an Internet-ready computer," said Elrond aloud to the Council, "it is deep within the caves of Moria. None have ever been able to use it, for it is defended by a demon of the ancient world."
"Excellent," said Gandalf, "we'll go to Moria."
To Be Continued
Legolas travels to Moria. Some other people go too, but Legolas is all that matters, isn't he?
Thanks to all the people who have reviewed, I will no longer beg. I will rely on the good hearts of the readers.
