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Chapter 10: Galadriel and Characters left out of the Story.
After the pointless Battle of Lórien Customs, the Fellowship decided that the only logical place to go was into Lothlórien, as they had originally planned. So they continued to stand in line at Customs until they had finally declared all their sadness and evil. After doing so, they were admitted into the Golden Wood.
"Hi guys!" said two sprightly hobbits.
"Who are you?" asked Legolas.
"We're Merry and Pippin," said one of the hobbits, "and these good people," he gestured to a group, "are Arwen the "usurper of parts"; Glorfindel, Tom Bombadil, and Goldberry the "left out of the movie"; Gollum the "creepy dude with a lisp"; Faramir, Eowyn, Theoden, and Eomer the "I didn't want to put them in my story"; and all the people from the Battle of the Pelennor Fields the "hard to keep track of."
"I like your epithets" said Frodo.
"Thank you," said Merry and Pippin, "Unfortunately we must leave. We're going to the circus." With that they all rode out of Lothlórien on lavender turkeys headed for the circus.
"Hello!" said a voice behind them.
"Gandalf!" said Frodo, "you're alive!"
"How did you know I died?"
Frodo made his explanation for mysteriously knowing everything that happened while he was in Gondor and summed up the secret of the universe in one sentence. Unfortunately, a dune buggy spontaneously combusted while he was talking and made his words inaudible to the audience.
". . . and that's the secret of life," he finished.
"My dune buggy blew up," said Legolas.
"Who cares?" said Gandalf.
Then the reunited Fellowship walked through the beautiful woods until they met Galadriel.
"Hello," she said in a misty voice, "I am Galadriel. Welcome to my realm. I can read your minds you know."
"Usted me expelió de aquí," said Mercedes in a haughty voice.
"You are a Spanish-speaking elf," said Galadriel in a calm voice, "we do not understand you."
"Eso es porque usted es estúpida," said Mercedes, "y su bosque es muy feo, como tú."
"She says that she misses her home here," said Galadriel, "She used to reside in these woods before I kicked all her kind out. I learned Spanish."
"Um," said Legolas.
"I know what you are thinking," said Galadriel, "but I'm already married to Celeborn the purposeless."
"I didn't. . ."
"I am all-powerful and all-knowing!"
"The Spanish chick said. . ."
"Look, I can make myself scary looking!"
"Would you please listen. . ."
"Ooooooh! Be afraid!"
"Shut up!"
After Galadriel made herself evil looking and started threatening to turn the Fellowship into shellfish and spread a reign of terror over all who eat whipped cream and pop tarts, they decided they'd better go to Gondor and send word to Queen Catalina that everything had worked out as she had requested.
They left the Golden Wood and were just about to hop the double-decker bus for Gondor when they saw a group of trees walking towards them.
"We're Ents" they said.
"Cool," said Frodo.
"Did we miss the circus group of all the characters not in the story?"
"Yea,"
"And the author's to lazy to scroll up and add us?"
"She types these things pretty fast."
"Oh. We lost our girlfriends you know"
"Who cares?" said Gandalf.
With that the forgotten Ents left the story forever, and the Fellowship continued on their way to Gondor.
To be continued.
Chapter 10: Galadriel and Characters left out of the Story.
After the pointless Battle of Lórien Customs, the Fellowship decided that the only logical place to go was into Lothlórien, as they had originally planned. So they continued to stand in line at Customs until they had finally declared all their sadness and evil. After doing so, they were admitted into the Golden Wood.
"Hi guys!" said two sprightly hobbits.
"Who are you?" asked Legolas.
"We're Merry and Pippin," said one of the hobbits, "and these good people," he gestured to a group, "are Arwen the "usurper of parts"; Glorfindel, Tom Bombadil, and Goldberry the "left out of the movie"; Gollum the "creepy dude with a lisp"; Faramir, Eowyn, Theoden, and Eomer the "I didn't want to put them in my story"; and all the people from the Battle of the Pelennor Fields the "hard to keep track of."
"I like your epithets" said Frodo.
"Thank you," said Merry and Pippin, "Unfortunately we must leave. We're going to the circus." With that they all rode out of Lothlórien on lavender turkeys headed for the circus.
"Hello!" said a voice behind them.
"Gandalf!" said Frodo, "you're alive!"
"How did you know I died?"
Frodo made his explanation for mysteriously knowing everything that happened while he was in Gondor and summed up the secret of the universe in one sentence. Unfortunately, a dune buggy spontaneously combusted while he was talking and made his words inaudible to the audience.
". . . and that's the secret of life," he finished.
"My dune buggy blew up," said Legolas.
"Who cares?" said Gandalf.
Then the reunited Fellowship walked through the beautiful woods until they met Galadriel.
"Hello," she said in a misty voice, "I am Galadriel. Welcome to my realm. I can read your minds you know."
"Usted me expelió de aquí," said Mercedes in a haughty voice.
"You are a Spanish-speaking elf," said Galadriel in a calm voice, "we do not understand you."
"Eso es porque usted es estúpida," said Mercedes, "y su bosque es muy feo, como tú."
"She says that she misses her home here," said Galadriel, "She used to reside in these woods before I kicked all her kind out. I learned Spanish."
"Um," said Legolas.
"I know what you are thinking," said Galadriel, "but I'm already married to Celeborn the purposeless."
"I didn't. . ."
"I am all-powerful and all-knowing!"
"The Spanish chick said. . ."
"Look, I can make myself scary looking!"
"Would you please listen. . ."
"Ooooooh! Be afraid!"
"Shut up!"
After Galadriel made herself evil looking and started threatening to turn the Fellowship into shellfish and spread a reign of terror over all who eat whipped cream and pop tarts, they decided they'd better go to Gondor and send word to Queen Catalina that everything had worked out as she had requested.
They left the Golden Wood and were just about to hop the double-decker bus for Gondor when they saw a group of trees walking towards them.
"We're Ents" they said.
"Cool," said Frodo.
"Did we miss the circus group of all the characters not in the story?"
"Yea,"
"And the author's to lazy to scroll up and add us?"
"She types these things pretty fast."
"Oh. We lost our girlfriends you know"
"Who cares?" said Gandalf.
With that the forgotten Ents left the story forever, and the Fellowship continued on their way to Gondor.
To be continued.
