The four little Hobbits and the wizard were sitting and waiting for someone
to find the blasted treasure. Pippin and Merry were munching away on their
favorite snacks; an onion and a Brussel Sprout.
"I found it!" Boromir yelled as his shovel hit against something hard.
By the time they heaved the chest out of the ground it was nightfall. The chest had a big lock on it.
"Let me go at it!" Gimli yelled and charged at the lock with his axe. The lock didn't budge.
"Step aside dwarf." Boromir pushed Gimli out of the way and began hacking with his mighty sword, but yet again the lock didn't budge.
So the Fellowship sat around watching Boromir, Aragorn and Gimli try to pry open the chest.
"Does anyone have any dynamite?" Boromir asked.
"Dynamite?" Frodo looked puzzled at Gandalf.
"No." Pixie sighed. "I wish. If we did Nice Boy wouldn't be here by now."
Pippins head began to lean forward and a slight snoring could be heard.
"No! Don't make him fall asleep!" Legolas and Pixie yelled in utter horror.
But it was too late. Pippin was already rolling around on the ground muttering dirty insanities. So Legolas and Pixie ran away as far as they could. Which was only about 10 feet.
"That lock isn't going to be open anytime soon." Frodo sighed and kicked Pippin.
"They need a key Mr. Frodo, that's what they need." Sam said.
"And where are they planning on getting this key? Aye?" Merry asked as he finished his Brussel Sprout.
Merry and Frodo looked at each other.
"Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" Frodo asked devilishly.
"Lets hope so." Merry replied and the two Hobbits ran over to Legolas.
"Mr. Elf," Merry began. "Can we have one of your arrows?"
"Hell no!" Pixie said as Legolas hugged his arrows protectively.
"We just need one to jimmy open that chest for them." Merry continued to plead.
"I will do it myself." Legolas said still hugging his arrows.
"Fine, just go already." Frodo whined.
"And..voila!" Legolas said as he took the lock of the chest.
"Finally we find a use for you," Gimli growled and got hit on the helmet by Pixie.
Boromir jumped in and opened the chest to get its contents to himself.
"Hey!" Sam said. "It's just a piece of paper!"
"Blast and damn!" Boromir screamed.
"What's it say?" Frodo asked jumping up and down trying to get a better look.
"'Dear Fellowship,
This is Dark Lord Sauron here. Sorry for guiding you off track mates (losers). But the Ring can't be destroyed. Sorry for wasting your time fellas (losers). Be off on your way now. Cheerio!'
That bastard!" Boromir yelled.
"Well that was a waste of time." Aragorn said disappointed.
"Young'uns." Gandalf said and took a puff of his pipe.
"I am not young!" Legolas protested. "I am two thousand nine hundred and thirty-one years old!"
"Calm down, old boy." Boromir chuckled.
"At least I am going to live for-" Legolas began again.
"Yeah, yeah, we know," Boromir said annoyed. "Live for ever."
"Yeah, calm down," Frodo teased. "You'll LIVE LONGER!" and fell on the ground laughing.
"I found it!" Boromir yelled as his shovel hit against something hard.
By the time they heaved the chest out of the ground it was nightfall. The chest had a big lock on it.
"Let me go at it!" Gimli yelled and charged at the lock with his axe. The lock didn't budge.
"Step aside dwarf." Boromir pushed Gimli out of the way and began hacking with his mighty sword, but yet again the lock didn't budge.
So the Fellowship sat around watching Boromir, Aragorn and Gimli try to pry open the chest.
"Does anyone have any dynamite?" Boromir asked.
"Dynamite?" Frodo looked puzzled at Gandalf.
"No." Pixie sighed. "I wish. If we did Nice Boy wouldn't be here by now."
Pippins head began to lean forward and a slight snoring could be heard.
"No! Don't make him fall asleep!" Legolas and Pixie yelled in utter horror.
But it was too late. Pippin was already rolling around on the ground muttering dirty insanities. So Legolas and Pixie ran away as far as they could. Which was only about 10 feet.
"That lock isn't going to be open anytime soon." Frodo sighed and kicked Pippin.
"They need a key Mr. Frodo, that's what they need." Sam said.
"And where are they planning on getting this key? Aye?" Merry asked as he finished his Brussel Sprout.
Merry and Frodo looked at each other.
"Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" Frodo asked devilishly.
"Lets hope so." Merry replied and the two Hobbits ran over to Legolas.
"Mr. Elf," Merry began. "Can we have one of your arrows?"
"Hell no!" Pixie said as Legolas hugged his arrows protectively.
"We just need one to jimmy open that chest for them." Merry continued to plead.
"I will do it myself." Legolas said still hugging his arrows.
"Fine, just go already." Frodo whined.
"And..voila!" Legolas said as he took the lock of the chest.
"Finally we find a use for you," Gimli growled and got hit on the helmet by Pixie.
Boromir jumped in and opened the chest to get its contents to himself.
"Hey!" Sam said. "It's just a piece of paper!"
"Blast and damn!" Boromir screamed.
"What's it say?" Frodo asked jumping up and down trying to get a better look.
"'Dear Fellowship,
This is Dark Lord Sauron here. Sorry for guiding you off track mates (losers). But the Ring can't be destroyed. Sorry for wasting your time fellas (losers). Be off on your way now. Cheerio!'
That bastard!" Boromir yelled.
"Well that was a waste of time." Aragorn said disappointed.
"Young'uns." Gandalf said and took a puff of his pipe.
"I am not young!" Legolas protested. "I am two thousand nine hundred and thirty-one years old!"
"Calm down, old boy." Boromir chuckled.
"At least I am going to live for-" Legolas began again.
"Yeah, yeah, we know," Boromir said annoyed. "Live for ever."
"Yeah, calm down," Frodo teased. "You'll LIVE LONGER!" and fell on the ground laughing.
