Heh heh. There was an actual joke that I got this idea from, but Van was such a perfect name to use! Too bad I don't own him and the rest of Escaflowne.

What would Van be if:


-if he was someone's Japanese boyfriend?
~Van-chan

-if he liked Asian food and was someone's Japanese boyfriend?
~Van won-ton chan

-if he had a Jamaican accent and liked Asian food and was someone's Japanese boyfriend?
~Van mon won-ton chan

-if he was an early riser and had a Jamaican accent and liked Asian food and was someone's Japanese boyfriend?
~Van dawn mon won-ton chan

-if he was an escaped prisoner and an early riser and had a Jamaican accent and liked Asian food and was someone's Japanese boyfriend?
~Van con dawn mon won-ton chan

-if he liked expensive candy and was an escaped prisoner and an early riser and had a Jamaican accent and liked Asian food and was someone's Japanese boyfriend?
~Van bon-bon con dawn mon won-ton chan

-if he was a baby deer and liked expensive candy and was an escaped prisoner and an early riser and had a Jamaican accent and liked Asian food and was someone's Japanese boyfriend?
~Van fawn bon-bon con dawn mon won-ton chan

-if he was always tired and was a baby deer and liked expensive candy and was an escaped prisoner and an early riser and had a Jamaican accent and liked Asian food and was someone's Japanese boyfriend?
~Van yawn fawn bon-bon con dawn mon won-ton chan

-if he was a yard of grass and was always tired and was a baby deer and liked expensive candy and was an escaped prisoner and an early riser and had a Jamaican accent and liked Asian food and was someone's Japanese boyfriend?
~Van lawn yawn fawn bon-bon con dawn mon won-ton chan

-if he was never there and a yard of grass and was always tired and was a baby deer and liked expensive candy and was an escaped prisoner and an early riser and had a Jamaican accent and liked Asian food and was someone's Japanese boyfriend?
~Van gone lawn yawn fawn bon-bon con dawn mon won-ton chan

-if he played chess and was never there and a yard of grass and was always tired and was a baby deer and liked expensive candy and was an escaped prisoner and an early riser and had a Jamaican accent and liked Asian food and was someone's Japanese boyfriend?
~Van pawn gone lawn yawn fawn bon-bon con dawn mon won-ton chan

-if he was one of Harry Potter's best friends and played chess and was never there and a yard of grass and was always tired and was a baby deer and liked expensive candy and was an escaped prisoner and an early riser and had a Jamaican accent and liked Asian food and was someone's Japanese boyfriend?
~Van ron pawn gone lawn yawn fawn bon-bon con dawn mon won-ton chan

-if he was important in Japan and was one of Harry Potter's best friends and he played chess and was never there and a yard of grass and was always tired and was a baby deer and liked expensive candy and was an escaped prisoner and an early riser and had a Jamaican accent and liked Asian food and was someone's Japanese boyfriend?
~Van san ron pawn gone lawn yawn fawn bon-bon con dawn mon won-ton chan

-if he lasted forever and was important in Japan and was one of Harry Potter's best friends and he played chess and was never there and a yard of grass and was always tired and was a baby deer and liked expensive candy and was an escaped prisoner and an early riser and had a Jamaican accent and liked Asian food and was someone's Japanese boyfriend?
~Van eon san ron pawn gone lawn yawn fawn bon-bon con dawn mon won-ton chan

-if he had the first name of Kangus and lasted forever and was important in Japan and was one of Harry Potter's best friends and he played chess and was never there and a yard of grass and was always tired and was a baby deer and liked expensive candy and was an escaped prisoner and an early riser and had a Jamaican accent and liked Asian food and was someone's Japanese boyfriend?
~Van kahn eon san ron pawn gone lawn yawn fawn bon-bon con dawn mon won-ton chan

-if he was a king of a country and had the first name of Kangus and lasted forever and was important in Japan and was one of Harry Potter's best friends and he played chess and was never there and a yard of grass and was always tired and was a baby deer and liked expensive candy and was an escaped prisoner and an early riser and had a Jamaican accent and liked Asian food and was someone's Japanese boyfriend?
~A person with a very long name!

Yeah, I know "chan" can be pronunced "ch-an", but I pronounce it "ch-on"