*See Parts 1-2 for Warnings*

© 2000 MCL

Old lives shattered, New ones born
Part 6


Hawkeye slept the night through until early morning, when he woke with a hangover that could kill the colonel's horse, and a tennis ball in his mouth. He sat up on his bed and groaned, soon wishing he hadn't made any noises at all as every tiny sound was amplified a hundred times louder to his hungover ears and head.

Hawkeye stood up, dragging his blanket with him until it fell off right before he went out the swamp's door. He walked to the shower and stood underneath it, completely clothed. He pulled the lever and water sprayed him, as he tried to let the coldness of the water wash away the memory of the night before. He was snapping out of his hangover headache a little, and he really didn't notice.

The one thing he couldn't forget, the one thing he wanted to erase out of himself sooo much, he couldn't. That face. The face of pain, fear, sorrow. Chelsea's face, how pain-filled her poor little face looked as she begged someone to take all her pain away, to knock her out. It was then that Hawkeye realized he was doing something he hadn't done in years.

He was crying. While the water soaked him, Hawkeye held onto the walls of the shower stall and hung his head, crying in a way he hadn't done since he was a little kid himself. It had been so long, it almost felt wrong to be that upset. After 10 minutes, he calmed himself down and turned off the water.

He looked up and was going to wipe away his tears when he saw BJ standing there. Neither one of them said anything, but the tears in BJ's eyes said it all. Hawkeye finally did go on with wiping his face, although thanks to the water, no one would be able to tell he'd 'bawled' at all, except for BJ, and he'd never say anything. He and Hawk were bestfriends, and Hawkeye was so glad for that. Not because he could tell everyone about him crying, just because he was glad he was there.

Hawkeye walked out of the stall, and BJ followed him out of the shower tent with a hand on his shoulder. Hawkeye smiled a little and went sloshing all the way back to the swamp, where he put on dry pants and then left again, with BJ staying behind, to go and see how his little one was doing.

Radar was with Chelsea when Hawkeye walked in. Chelsea looked so small and worn out that he nearly had to leave to have another crying fit. He swallowed and pushed his wet and dripping hair back into place. It was flopped back into place now, except for now he had bangs, making him look younger and a little cuter.

"HI Radar." Hawkeye said as he went over slowly. Radar smiled and looked up at him. "Morning sir, Chelsea's been tellin me about all kinds a stuff." Radar said and Hawkeye smiled a PR smile back.

"Hey Radar, I need to talk to Chelsea a few. Can you come and see her later?" Hawkeye asked. "Oh okay. Sure Hawkeye. I'll see ya later Chelsea." Radar said as he got up. Chelsea nodded as she yawned. Radar smiled and left, allowing Hawkeye and Chelsea some time alone. Hawkeye sat next to Chelsea on her bed and sighed.

"I cried." Chelsea said, almost out of no where. Hawkeye looked at her. "I yelled and I yelled and I even bit one of em..but they never stopped...They never..stopped." Chelsea said before Hawkeye could even ask. She had known he would know now because he had done her surgery, and not only that he was a doctor plain and simple.

"I was afraid to tell, I-" Chelsea said, feeling ashamed again. Hawkeye couldn't hardly keep still. He wanted to get up and pound something. Instead he reached over and held her good hand.

"Chelsea you're going to be okay. No one has to know except me, BJ and Margaret. We're the only ones who where in for your surgery." Hawkeye said, seconds later his heart breaking when she looked up at him and he saw her silent tears.

Hawkeye couldn't take it anymore. He picked her up and sat her on his lap, holding her tight. She seemed to have been waiting for him to do just that, as she held onto his shirt and cried.

Hawkeye held his emotions back and realized he'd broken doctor rule number one, but this wasn't a place that played by the rules, and he didn't give a damn. So he had gotten close to patient. So damn what.

"Are you gonna send me away? like all the others?" Chelsea asked as she felt a little safer in his arms. Hawkeye looked down at her and she loked up at him. He smiled and wiped her tears away with his hand.

"No. you're going to stay right here with me, BJ and Radar, and everyone else at the 4077th. You'll stay and carry on on with a last name only special people are worthy of. Pirece. You'll be Chelsea Pierce, daughter of world famous quack surgeon Benjamin Franklin Pirece." Hawkeye said and Chelsea was so happy she giggled and almost immeadiately fell asleep in Hawk's lap. Hawkeye smiled and carried her with him back to the swamp.

The swamp was her new home, and he didn't care what he had to do to keep it thatta way.

TBC