***Disclaimer: All the usual disclaimer spiel applies here. None of these characters are mine, they never were, and they never will be. Thank you and enjoy. ^_^x

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1 Summer Vacation

"So, is everyone ready to go?" asked Kaoru, jumping off the dojo porch and donning a sleek pair of sunglasses to shield her eyes from the blazing sun overhead. She was wearing an indigo Tommy tank top (with matching hair scrunchie, of course) and high-cut khaki shorts. Her too- cute outfit was topped off with a pair of stylin' platform thong sandals.

"Hai!! Ready as I'll ever be!" replied Misao with equal enthusiasm as she punched the air in excitement. She was sporting a black bikini top—which her figure had yet to fill to maximum capacity—with denim cutoffs and wore black Adidas flipflops. "Looks like Aoshi-sama and Sano are almost done loading the minivan, no thanks to Yahiko or Himu—hey! Where'd they go, anyway?"

Suddenly, there was a shout of frustration from inside the dojo as Yahiko made his grand exit. "I swear!" he muttered to an astonished Misao. Turning around to yell into the house, he added, "For the last time, Kenshin! Yes, I've gone to the freakin' bathroom! Three times—in your damned presence!"

Kaoru turned a jealous shade of green. "Hey, even I've never done that…"

Yahiko didn't hear. He was still complaining, "…not gonna leak on the car, ya know. God, Kenshin, ya sound like somebody's mother!"

Sano glanced up from loading the final bag into the minivan's trunk. "Heh! And with that pink gi, he sure as hell looks like somebody's mother—"

"Nani?!" Kaoru screeched.

THWACK THWACK! Sano's spiky head was covered with smoking blisters while Kaoru brandished her trusty bokken in his spiral-eyed face.

"Say that again and you'll be left home while the rest of us go to the beach!" she snapped. Then she straightened. "Yahiko! What's Kenshin do—"

"I'm coming, Kaoru-dono," came a placating voice. In a moment he was stepping out of the door, rubbing something on his ankle. "Has everyone put on their sunscreen?" He straightened up.

"KYAAAAAH!" Yahiko screamed and leapt into Misao's arms. Everyone gaped at the spectacle standing on the porch. Even Aoshi had the good grace to sweat-drop.

"Oro? What's everyone staring at de gozaru?" a confused Kenshin inquired.

"O-omae…" Sano began weakly, pointing with a wavering finger.

Kenshin was more than ready to face ultraviolet rays. Every square inch of his skin, from his forehead to his toes, was generously swathed in lotion. His wide purple eyes peered out from a mask of gloppy whiteness that resembled stiffened Cool Whip, while only the straps of his sandals were carefully sunscreen-free.

"D-don't you think you overdid it, Himura?" Misao ventured with a critical tilt of her head. "I mean, it's like, I'm not wearing any sunscreen—"

"Oro! You're not?!"

Kenshin was immediately at her side and rubbing a generous handful of the sun protection in vigorous circles onto her bare upper arm.

"I'm not wearing sunscreen, either!" Kaoru shouted desperately.

"..." Aoshi's face was grim as he pointed his kodachi at Kenshin's hand on Misao's shoulder. "…"

Misao beamed in delight. "Why, Aoshi-sama, don't tell me you're jealous!" She giggled delightedly. "Gimme some more, Himura."

"…" The kodachi did not budge.

Kenshin sweat-dropped. "So, who's driving?" he asked brightly.

………………..

"…and make the next left onto Exit 4a," Kaoru instructed, wrinkling her brow at the roadmap. "Mou, this print is so tiny! My eyes hurt." She flopped back in the passenger seat with a weary sigh.

Aoshi seemed to be focusing on the road, but his icy blue gaze reflected in the rearview mirror often flickered to Misao—and Kenshin. One half-sheathed kodachi was within easy grabbing reach, just in case the Sunscreen King tried anything funny again… Much to everyone's great amusement—and Misao's dismay—he continued to wear his trusty white trench coat over swimming trunks and a T-shirt. It was 110( outside.

"Ne, how much longer until we get to the beach, Aoshi-sama?" piped Misao from the backseat. "I can't wait!"

"Can't wait for what when ya don't got the boobs for that bikini?" Yahiko very unwisely taunted his seatmate, realizing only too late that she had secretly tucked a handful of kunai in her top.

"KANSATSU TOBI—"

"Maa maa—"

"Don't 'maa maa' me, Himura, since you and Chicken Head get to have the middle seats when I hafta share with Yahiko-chan—"

"DON'T CALL ME 'CHAN'!"

"Chicken Head?!" Sano guffawed. "Che! At least I'm not a stinkin' weasel—aack!" Three sharp daggers sliced into Sano's seatback, another barely missed Kaoru's headrest and clattered against the windshield.

"Misao-chan, try not to hit the map. We still have an hour's worth of driving to go," Kaoru said absently, still squinting to make out the fine print.

"Shall we switch drivers at the next rest stop? I can take over next de gozaru," Kenshin suggested, nervously eyeing a globule of sunscreen on the tip of his nose that threatened to fall at the next sudden lurch of the car—

Aoshi swerved to avoid a piece of roadkill.

The driblet landed with a sickly little splat on Kenshin's lap. He sighed. If only Kaoru hadn't confiscated his ten bottles of sunscreen he could immediately replace the missing gobbet. Heaven forbid that the vulnerable tip of his nose be left defenseless against the sun.

"Hey, if Kenshin gets to drive next I'll be navigator!" offered Sano.

"Forget it, Chicken Head," Misao growled from her slumped position in the backseat. "You can't read anything but a menu!"

Next to her, Yahiko snickered. "Not even. He just guesses at the dishes."

Three hours, two missed exits, and one emergency bathroom stop (thanks to Yahiko) later, they got to the beach. Above the noise in the parking lot could be heard the hum of enthusiastic vacationers who were obviously having a grand time under the sun.

As soon as Aoshi parked, Misao flung aside the sliding door and jumped out yelling, "Last one to hit the waves is a rotten piece of yakitori!"

"You're on!" Yahiko shouted emphatically, knocking Kenshin aside as he raced after the disappearing ninja girl.

"Oroooo?!" Kenshin gazed at his now-exposed knuckles. "Ano, Kaoru- dono, do you think you could maybe return just one bottle of—"

"You boys be careful unloading the car, all right? We'll meet you over there by the hotdog stand. Ja!" Kaoru flashed a brilliant smile and headed after the quickly disappearing figures of Misao and Yahiko.

Muttering under his breath, Sano turned to Kenshin who was dutifully piling his arms with beach chairs, towels, inflatable water toys, and as many sunscreen bottles as he could.

"Oi! Why're ya listenin' to her?" Sano demanded. "She's not doin' any work! Why should we be carryin' all the junk?"

"But she's saving us a place on the beach de gozaru," came Kenshin's muffled reply from behind a pyramid of precariously balanced junk. "I think it's only fair we bring the supplies."

"Che! Jou-chan's got ya twisted around her little finger, doesn't she, Kenshin?" Sano snorted. "Betcha Weasel Girl's got Shinomori over there on a one-foot leash! Actually, she ain't lookin' all that bad today in that swimsuit…"

"Ahou. Where do you think you're parking?"

Kenshin and Sano looked up in surprise.

Saitou stood by the car with a cigarette between his fingers and a smug grin on his face. He exhaled calmly. "This is a handicapped space."

"Well, he's handicapped," snapped Sano, jerking a thumb in Aoshi's direction. "Deaf mute."