Disclaimer: as useful as tits on a bullfrog, but needed any how.
Sailor Moon was created by Naoko Takeuchi, Oh My Goddess! characters
were created by Kosuke Fujishima and they belong to who/whatever
entity that's associated with them. Anything else belongs to their
respective creators.

Flames will be answered with either Evangelion mindfuck episodes, bad
DS9 & Voyager episodes, Rocket Attack USA, Rabid Barnies/Tuxboys, or
the complete run of BGC2040.

Feedback 'n' C&C is good.

Untitled (Jeez, there's a lot of these ain't there?) By Q

Chapter 1

Roger Darkholme, unwilling visitor to a Sailor Moon universe and suit
wearer, from his position under Usagi Tsukino was wondering what gods
had he offended to get into this mess. Her friends, Minako Aino, and
Makoto Kino were wondering who the cute guy was. And what about Ami
Mizuno? Well, she was worried about how late they where going to be
for their meeting at the Hikawa Shrine and also puzzled about what the
number 3 had to do with the Secrets of the Universe. The cats don't
count as they've seen this happen all the time.

Sailor Pluto has just received Excedrin headache #30 'The princess has
met the anomaly'. And another bout of Excedrin headache #13 'I can't
locate the threat.'

"Sorry about this," Usagi said while getting up.

"Urk" was Roger's response as she accidentally hit a certain region of
his anatomy.

"Jeez, Usagi, isn't Mamoru enough for you?" Minako teased.

"I...er...it's...he's..."

"He looks like my old sempai."

"..."

"But, Mako, he's like older than Mamoru."

[Bloody hell! She says that about virtually every guy she meets. Her
old sempai has to be one of the Nerima Wrecking Crew. That's _if_ they
exist here. I'd better ask one of them for some help] Roger thought,
[er...better make that: ask the smart one for help.]

"So, Mina, if you don't want him..." Makoto trailed off once she
caught the look on her fellow Sailor Scouts face. The look of...of...

"Not again!" Minako and Makoto cried, "When are we going to get the
cute guy?" as the cute guy was currently talking to Ami and ignoring
them.

"So, mademoiselle, can you tell me what shops are near by?"

"Well, there's a Manga No Mori, a camera shop, the arcade," Ami
replied pointing in the directions of the shops in question.

"Yes, I can see that. And I know about the jewellery store as I just
came from that way. How about a camping/surplus store?"

"I'm not quite sure if there is one. I'm more in to books and
computers than camping."

"I take it that there are shops that deal in the former, near by?"

"Yes of cause."

"Oh well, I'll manage and put my fate in the hands of the Norns,"
Roger told her while thinking, [but I won't trust Urd with it though.]

At the Norns' temple in Nekomi, Japan, Earth. Urd snarfed on her Sake.
But that could have been due to her spotting Mini-Marller/Mara being
chased by Banpei around the temple grounds.

"Thank you kindly," He Frasered before walking off, whistling 'Ode to
Joy'.
A part of Ami's mind finally took notice of the cute guy and sent an
IRQ to processing and she blushed, [Nice brown eyes. Were did that
come from?!].

"What a strange man. I wonder why he was afraid of me," Usagi said in
her Serenity voice.

"That can wait, because we are even later now, Usagi!" Luna yelled
before nipping at Usagi's ankle.

"Wah!" she cried breaking into a run to get away from the angry moon
cat. The citizens of Azuba-Juuban were again treated to the sight of
the running of the odango-head and her followers.

"Luna, are you sure she's the princess?"

"For the hundredth time, Artemis, of cause she is."

***

Roger Darkholme was grateful that he'd read that 'Manga No Mori' was a
chain of Manga stores in one of Grey's fics (as he was only familiar
with some of the shops in his home country and the odd US store/chain.)
as the titles on the shelves helped to give him more of an idea of which
universe he was in. Takahashi hadn't created Ranma 1/2 here, but had
still created Maison Ikkoku and that series that features Lum; that
explained the reaction he got from Mr. Shirow when he mentioned
Nerima. Nothing on the Norns and Tenchi. But a hell of a lot on Sailor
V, Slayers, Silent Mobius and Utena and the odd US comic title.

"Oooh, GITS 2. I hope the translation effect holds up."

Basically, he walked out of there with a bag loaded with most of the
interesting tech-based manga/anime (Dirty Pair, Patlabor, Cowboy
Bebop, etc) he could find and had filled his 'The Shirow' fix. The
nearby bookstore provided some maps, a Lonely Planet, and a Nipponese
to English dictionary (just in case), the computer store: a top of the
line notebook.

Roger's shop-sense directed him to an Army disposal shop; he left
that wearing a set of black BDUs, army boots, and with a backpack
containing the suit he had on before, and some other clothing to
imitate some individuals he knew must exist here (and some that
didn't) and a decent GPS unit. A tan duster, Shades of Utter Cool +3,
SWAT cap, shooting gloves, and a black wooden walking stick completed
the package.
In a BGC universe this is almost the uniform of a Bu-33-S-H
(although if you've read Illusions, it should be a Bu-34-S-H.).
Somewhere else it's the duty uniform of a military force.

[Bugger,] Roger thought while standing at the bottom of a staircase,
[I didn't want to come here, but I need his assistance.] before
walking up the stairs in to the home base of the Sailor Scouts, the
Cherry hill or Hikawa Shrine.

The Hikawa Shrine. The Hino residence lounge room. Sometime earlier.

"What kept _you_?" Rei Hino growled out as the rest of the Inner
Scouts tramped in.

"Ami met a cute guy," Minako and Makoto whined.

"You've got to be kidding. Ami? Met a cute guy!? Did you at least get
his phone number?"

"Rei, it wasn't like that. Usagi ran into him, and he was lost and
somewhat rattled. So, I just gave him some directions."

"Directions, is that all. What did he look like, Mina?"

"He's around 19 to 22, 6 foot one tall, black hair, brown eyes, and
was wearing a 1000 yen grey suit. For some reason he was extremely
nervous of Usagi. He called her meatball head instead of odango-head
like some people."

"Hang on. Isn't a odango, a type of meatball?"

"Oh, and she forgot to mention that he's also a gaijin," added Makoto.

Rei got an odd look on her face, [It can't be] she thought.

"Rei, what's wrong?" Usagi asked.

"The guy you met. The last fire reading I did had someone like him in
black, then in camouflage holding a large gun in it. It also had in
the background three powerful beings doing something to a tree, an odd
looking rabbit bouncing around and someone on a motorcycle."

"Hey, where's the Outers?" Artemis asked.

"They said they'd be along later. Setsuna's not feeling too good.
Haruka said something about a migraine she sent Michiru off to the
chemists for some painkillers and other medicine."

"(Not good, Pluto's down with a migraine. Must be a Dark Kingdom
plot,)" Luna muttered.

[I'll give _you_ Dark Kingdom plots,] Artemis thought before saying,
"(Luna, she's probably ill. Perhaps, she ate something that disagreed
with her?)"

"(Artemis, that's the most ridicules thing I've ever heard. No one
could be that bad a cook.)"

At that moment, where ever they are: Ryoko, Akane, Ayeka, and Urd
sneezed.

~~~

"Can I help you?" Grandfather Hino asked the lost looking tourist.

"Yes, I'm looking for the head priest."

"You've found him." He replied, the tourists face lit up and he looked
a little less lost.

"Ah, is there somewhere where we can speak in private?"

"Follow me," Grandfather Hino said leading him to the residences
kitchen, mildly surprised by his guests removal of his shoes as he
entered the house, but was more surprised by the shoes themselves:
black leather lace up army boots.
The backpack was unremarkable but he had his suspicions about the
walking stick. And a trenchcoat in this weather, honestly. At least
it wasn't black.
"Would you like some tea?"

"Black, please."

"So, what can I do for you?" the elder Hino asked as he handed the mug
of tea over.

"Right, my name's Roger Darkholme. I'm looking for some friends that
may be staying at some shrines."

"Friends of yours are staying at shrines? They must be some odd
friends?"

"Oh that they are. I'm relatively new to the country myself
(literally), I don't have their contact details and I'm just going
by what stories they told me."

"So, you're going by the old shrinekeeper network."

"Why not? It's Easier than trying the Nerima Kaizoku, or is that just
an old wives tail?"

"'Nerima Kaizoku'? I've never heard of that name before. So, what
shrines do you think your 'friends' are staying at?"

[Never heard of the frelling Nerima Kaizoku?! It must be either early
in that storyline or it's a low key or near canon Nabiki,] Roger
thought, taking a sip of his tea, before saying, "Well, sir--"

"Call me Grandfather Hino."

"Right, well, Grandfather Hino, one lot is staying at an old shrine
somewhere near Tokyo, they're cousins of mine, I think. They told me
it had a Buddhist monk staying there when they first arrived, before
he left saying something about a goddess."

"Ah, that one, a right true nut he was. That shrine's in Nekomi, I've
got its address around here somewhere. What about the others?"

"_Others_...ah them. Does a Katsuhito Masaki run a shrine in Okayama?"

"The Masaki Shrine, it supposed to be holding the Ryokoakurei. That's
according to the legends."

"Is that so," he mused, "has the Great Seto bridge been damaged?"

"You haven't heard about _that_!? That happened eight months ago!"

"I've been out of the loop, so to speak."

~~~

"Rei, got any more cookies?" Usagi asked holding the tray that had
contained cookies while reading one of Rei's mangas.

"_Usagi_!" Rei growled, before muttering repeatedly, "(must not get
angry)".

"We're here," Haruka called out as the Outers entered the room,
Setsuna looking pale, Michiru and Hotaru hovered near her concerned.

"What's wrong with Setsuna?"

"She's not feeling too good," Michiru said as they led Setsuna to the
comfy chair.

"There's a threat to Crystal Tokyo." Setsuna said once she was sitting
in the comfy chair, "and I can't find it!"

"All my fire reading has shown is a man in black with a large gun,
three beings, and a tree. And seeing that someone ate all the
cookies," Rei refrained from glaring at Usagi, "I'd better see if
there's any more in the kitchen."

~~~

"Thanks for your help, Grandfather Hino."

"Not a problem, I'm glad I could help." He replied, opening the
sliding door to the yard.

"Grandfather, have you seen where the--YOU!" Rei said as she entered
the kitchen.

"Me?! Me who? I suppose, Grandfather Hino, that is your grand-
daughter."

"That she is. Rei this is Mr. Darkholme, Mr. Darkholme, Rei."

"Enchante," He said doing a courtly bow and kissing her hand, Rei
blushed got flustered and ran off to get the others. "Weird girl, nice
but weird," he muttered while pulling on his boots before walking out
into the courtyard, backpack in hand.

In the room where the rest of the Scouts where waiting, Rei came
screaming in, "he's here."

"Who's here?" Usagi asked.

"Usagi!! The guy you ran into earlier. Remember?" growled Rei. "Come
on, he's leaving!" she said dragging Usagi out with her.

"He's here! Yes, maybe he'll take me on a date." Minako & Makoto said
before glaring at each other and running after Rei. Ami, the moon cats
& the Outer just shrugged and followed.

***

Somewhere else, Skuld entered an office, one half of the office was
wood paneling, bookcases, a couch, and a decent A/V installation. The
other half was computers, weapons, and a small kitchen. Skuld's eyes
lit up when she noticed who was using the computer. "Grandpa, your all
right!" she said as she glomped him.

"Why wouldn't I be all right, Skuld?" he asked turning the glomp into
a comforting hug.

"i was looking for urd ...'cause she was late for dinner...up in
asgard, and...and I saw you in one of toltiir's pool," She sobbed.

"Well that can't be the case, as I'm here. However it could be one of
my avatars. (I flonqing set a universe up, come back a month or score
latter and I find a whole pantheon of gods and assorted deities,
Yggdrasil (and its ilk), and Washu has the deeds to two galaxies.)"

"Avatars?" She puzzledly asked.

"You don't have to worry about that. So, what's on the menu?"

"Lasagne and spaghetti bolognaise."

"With garlic bread?" he asked.

"Grandpa, this is oneesama of cause there will be garlic bread."

"Igor, hold my calls and get Chrono, Maya, and MP to track down one of
my spares. Get them to check Mimir's Well for a starting point. I'm
off to Belldandy's."

"Yeth mathter," One of the computers responded.

"Igor."

"Yeth, Q-Kami?"

"Cut the Pterry Igor accent. MP's bad enough when she's doing Valley
Girl."

"Roger roger," came out of Igor's speaker duplicating a Trooper drone
from SW: Episode 1.

"I just can't win, can I? Door: Norns' temple." He and Skuld stepped
through the resulting orange-technicolour thing that appeared.

***

Roger was looking at the shrine when he heard Rei walk up behind him.
The others where hiding in hearing distance. "So, what was it with the
'you' back there?" He asked.

"Well..., some friends of mine...told me about this guy that they had
met and--"

"You mean how Usagi ran into me and Minako and Makoto did the 'mine,
mine' thing."

"How...how, did you know their names?"

"Now, that...is a secret," He Xelliosed.

"Ahhrg!" she screamed, this attracted the attention of the other
Scouts.

"Rei!" Those that are prone too yelled as they came out of hiding.

"All right, what are you--" Haruka trailed off there as the attacker
wasn't doing anything apart from triggering a bout of Rei's temper.
"Who are you? What do you want?"

[Hmm...an opening, too bad I don't have the props.] "Never ask that
question."

"What happened?"

"Haruka, just used a phrase from a American sci-fi series," Ami
answered. "Why are you here?"

"Would you believe that I'm a Kami sent to save the population of the
world from being turned in to goo by a mad scientist?" Roger told
them.

"I find that quite hard to believe," Rei said in response.

"Would you believe that I'm an alien from Zeta Cygni sent here to
steal the souls of juvenile human females?"

"No!" All the scouts (except for Setsuna) yelled.

"Then how about I'm a secret agent sent to investigate a bunch of
Lunarian cultists that plan to take over the world by removing
everyone's free will?" Roger said with a smirk, the two cats and the
green-haired woman appeared to be undergoing some sort of fit. [He
shoots. He scores! Both moon cats and Sailor Pluto faceplanted and
twitching. Bwahaha!] He thought while a part of his mind was doing a
victory dance.
"Well I have to be off. Girls," sharp nod of his head to the
Inners, "ladies," a half bow to Setsuna, Haruka, and Michiru,
"squirt," he ruffled Hotaru's hair, "and cats. Be seeing you."
saluting to both moon cats before walking off at a brisk pace, walking
stick counting a beat.

'He knows' was a common thought amongst the group.

***

Roger walked from the Hikawa shrine to the nearest subway station
which was coincidently Azabujuban (although he could have walked to
Roppongi, if he knew were that was) humming and singing bits of pieces
of U2s 'Beautiful Day' puzzling passers by. Of course they would be
puzzled as the song was released during 2000 and the current year was
sometime in 1990's possibly mid '95.
The ticket machines puzzled the heck out of him; it got to the
point where he had to use the ticket office so he could work out how
to get to Chiba which according to his limited knowledge of the Ah!
Megami-sama manga and the details that he got from Grandfather Hino,
was where Nekomi, NIT, and the shrine are located. He wandering along
the station concourse trying to locate the next part of his journey:
the platform from which the train to the interchange for Chiba. When a
yell of "Ranma get back here you idiot!" broke him from his thoughts
before a red, blue and black blur bowled him over, shortly followed by
a brown haired teenaged girl in a high school uniform.
Come to think of it there was a bunch about wearing similar
uniforms. The fact of the matter was Furinkan High School junior year
with some hangers on, had a mass excursion to the Tokyo Tower.
"Hey, watch were you're going." Roger yelled to the rapidly departing
figures as he got up from the tiled floor.

"You," a voice bellowed.

"Eh, what's up, doc!" Roger said turning to face the voice.
[Oh...bugger, tis him.] He thought and tightened his grip on his
walking stick while loosening up the straps of his backpack.

"How dare you, you _impudent gaijin_, talk to the pig-tailed goddess
and Tendo Akane like that? For that I--" We all know who this joker
is, don't we.

"Ja, ja, I know, I know. You're Tatewaki Kuno, imprudent scion of the
house of Kuno, The 'Blue Blunder' of Furinkan High School. And bane of
the houses of Tendo and Saotome."

"So, yet another one falls prey to the foul sorcery of Saotome. Or
perhaps is helping him? Ah, pig-tailed goddess, Tendo Akane, you've
come to see me defeat yet another of Saotome's dark minions." Kuno
ranted, bokken waving about.

"Kuno! He's not another--ooff" "Ranma, be quiet."

"Yeah, right bub, whatever you believe. Why don't be a good samurai
and frell off, eh?" Roger said slowly backing away, walking stick at
rest, backpack ready to drop.

"Hold _varmint_! Who's not given their name."

"(Oh boy! And I forgot about that.)"

"You will not escape the righteous fury of Kuno Tatewaki." Kuno said,
charged bokken swinging for a disembowelling wound and was blocked and
parried by the walking stick.

"Watch it you daft berk. Get clear. Here look after this," Roger said
passing his pack off to what looked like Yuka.

"Kuno, he's not a martial artist," Ranko called out as the fight
continued strikes being blocked and parried on both sides.

"You know you should listen to her. She's the better fighter," Roger
said as he attempted a disarming strike.

"At least you're admitting that we are your betters." Kuno blustered
as he blocked and went for a head strike.

"Feh!" Ranko, Akane, and Roger said to that, as Roger blocked the strike.

"Kuno, if you are not playing dumb, you are a fool. Let's end this.
You wanted to know my name, fine!" Roger said sweeping into a pose,
doing something to his walking stick, "I am Roger Darkholme,
apprentice of the...of the...Deadpool...um, School of...Mercenary
Arts." A section of the walking stick slid away revealing a blade,
which he then used to cleave Kuno's bokken in two, before resheaving
it.
Kuno's eyes widened, "A zatoichi! You are a dishonourable cur!"

"(Ranma have you ever heard of the Deadpool School of Mercenary
Arts?)" Akane quietly asked.

"(Nope, but what he seems to be doing is imitating swordfighting. I
swear he did some moves from a Jackie Chan movie,)" Ranko replied.

"Oh blow it out your ear shit for brains! Who are you to talk about
dishonour? Oh yeah, ROCHAMBEAU!" All those spectators of the male
gender and the sole known aquatranssexual winced.

"i fight on," moaned the Kuno as he tried to get up while holding lil'
Kuno.

"For crying out loud. He's still moving."

"He does that," Ranko replied.

"Okay, BOOT TO THE HEAD," Roger said as he gave Kuno a swift hard kick
to the head that caused his head to slam into a nearby column,
unconsciousness soon followed, "Kuno's gone bye-bye, Egon."

"About time," Ranko muttered, "you're not bad for an untrained
fighter."

"You picked that up? Of cause you would. It was just dumb luck, I know
Buckleys about hand to hand, and mechanised combat is more my style.
Bloody hell look at the time, I'm late for my train. Thanks for
looking after my bag, miss. And Ranko."

"Huh!?! My names Ran-- ooff-- Akane!"

"Your name is Ranko," Akane hissed.

"Whatever, just tell the panda: we'll be watching him," Roger said
before running off towards the platforms.

"Tell pop, 'We'll be watching him', who the hell has he pissed off
now?" Said a puzzled Ranko/Ranma-chan.

***

Roger just managed to catch the train, and had little trouble
after that, he arrived in Chiba in the middle of the peak hour, of
cause his fellow travellers ignored the crazy gaijin in black humming
the 'Peter Gunn theme' and waveing a walking stick around. The credit
cards worked in an ATM as they had the same PINs as one of his
computer passwords so he had some more cash on hand. From the station
to the temple he took a taxi. As he walked onto the shrines' grounds,
the only person here could see was a girl in her late teens wearing a
t-shirt and jeans working on a Kawasaki KSR-II. When he got with in a
few meters of her, something made her look in his direction.
"Hi there I'm Morisato Megumi are you looking for my brother,
Keiichi?" She asked him.

"Er, no Ms Morisato, I'm looking for Belldandy Wishbringer and her
sisters' Urd Snowmane and Skuld Ravenhair," He said pausing to wait
for her reaction, "I'm their cousin Roger Darkholme. Sorry 'bout
this."

TBC?