The Royally Ticked off Insane half-Klingon with Relay Cutters.
By: LadyNeptune
I know you hate them, but I have to write it. It's my only chance to play lawyer.
Standard disclaimer: I don't own the characters of Star Trek: Voyager. As much as I wish I did. I'm just using them for my own twisted pleasure ::evil grin::. This story was written for fun and not a profit. Star Trek and all of its characters are owned by Paramount Pictures. DARN!!!
This entire thing is dialog. I also have a full version available.
"Tom, hand me the plasma injector."
"Here. That won't work, 'Lanna."
"Yes, it will."
"It isn't the relays; it's the containment."
"The plasma containment has nothing to do with this!"
"Actually, if you would just go by the book this wouldn't happen."
"Who asked you Carey? If we always followed Starfleet's hair-brained protocols we'd be dead by now."
"Hair-brained? Why you little-"
"Carey, get out of here before I through you into the warp core."
"Jeez, someone has an attitude. "
"GO!"
"Fine, see ya Tom."
"Bye. 'Lanna, couldn't you have been a little more civil to him?"
"Shut up Tom, or I'll rip out your tongue and where it as a belt."
*Chuckle* "Go ahead."
"Tom-"
"All right! All right! I'll shut up, just let go! 'Lanna, I can't breathe!"
"Fine."
"Jeez, you have a good grip there. Remind me not to tick you off again."
"No problem. Now hand me a fuser. "
"Here, why waste your time on this? I mean it isn't the relays that are the problem..."
"Tom-shut up."
"If it were then the whole warp core wouldn't be working..."
"Tom..."
"And it is..."
"Tom..."
"So it isn't the relays..."
"TOM"
"Which means it's the containment."
"TOM SHUT UP!"
"Okay, ow. Easy 'Lanna. Easy. Don't kill me don't oh, Jeez! Put the cutter down, 'Lanna, put it down, come on. Don't kill me, just put it down. You don't really want to kill me, do you?"
"Yes."
"'Lanna, please. Just. Put the cutters down. Jeez! That was close!"
"Stand still."
"OW! You cut me! 'Lanna, please. I'm sorry, okay. I'll shut up. You were right. It was the relays, just please, don't kill me. Get away from me with those will you, they're dangerous. Heck, you're dangerous."
"Hey, what're you guys doin'?"
"Harry, help me! I think she's gone nuts!"
"Nuts? Yeah right Tom. I don't think B'Elanna will ever go nuts."
"Oh yeah?"
"Wow! Okay, I could be wrong. B'Elanna please put those cutters down. Come on don't kill us."
"Why not?"
"Uh, Tom?"
"What?"
"I think we have a problem."
"No really? My half-Klingon fiance has gone nuts and cornered us, she is royally ticked off and coming at us with relay cutters. I don't see any problem with that, do you?"
"No."
"Tom, it was really nice knowing you. "
"Shut up. She isn't serious, is she?"
"She looks pretty serious."
"Then it was nice know'n ya Harry."
"This is it!"
*Laughing* "You guys are so stupid!"
"What?!"
"'Lanna, what are you talking about?"
"'Harry, help I think she's gone nuts' Tom you idiot, did you actually think I would kill you?"
"You were joking?"
"Yep. You should have seen the look on your faces."
"I can't believe you tricked us."
" Believe it Flyboy. Jeez, that was funny."
"No it wasn't."
" Actually it was a pretty good trick, come on Harry where's your sense of humor?"
"Maybe it got cut out by your royally ticked off insane half-Klingon fiance."
"That's not funny."
"Oh, come on Harry. Lighten up. She really fooled us."
"All right fine. I guess we were pretty stupid."
"You think?"
"Come on, 'Lanna, let's go get something to eat. You comin' Harry?"
"Sure wait up."
"What's Neelix making tonight?"
"It better not have any leola root in it."
"If it does we can reheat the picnic."
"Let's save that for later."
"Uh, guys? Let's not tell anyone about this."
"Yeah. 'Lanna? You're not going to hold this over my head for the rest of my life, are you?"
"Yep."
"'Lanna!"
"What? It would make a great toast at the wedding."
"'Lanna! You wouldn't."
"Yes, Tom. She would."
"Come on, B'Elanna. Please?"
"Fine, but I will never let you guys forget this."
"Great."
"No kidding."
By: LadyNeptune
I know you hate them, but I have to write it. It's my only chance to play lawyer.
Standard disclaimer: I don't own the characters of Star Trek: Voyager. As much as I wish I did. I'm just using them for my own twisted pleasure ::evil grin::. This story was written for fun and not a profit. Star Trek and all of its characters are owned by Paramount Pictures. DARN!!!
This entire thing is dialog. I also have a full version available.
"Tom, hand me the plasma injector."
"Here. That won't work, 'Lanna."
"Yes, it will."
"It isn't the relays; it's the containment."
"The plasma containment has nothing to do with this!"
"Actually, if you would just go by the book this wouldn't happen."
"Who asked you Carey? If we always followed Starfleet's hair-brained protocols we'd be dead by now."
"Hair-brained? Why you little-"
"Carey, get out of here before I through you into the warp core."
"Jeez, someone has an attitude. "
"GO!"
"Fine, see ya Tom."
"Bye. 'Lanna, couldn't you have been a little more civil to him?"
"Shut up Tom, or I'll rip out your tongue and where it as a belt."
*Chuckle* "Go ahead."
"Tom-"
"All right! All right! I'll shut up, just let go! 'Lanna, I can't breathe!"
"Fine."
"Jeez, you have a good grip there. Remind me not to tick you off again."
"No problem. Now hand me a fuser. "
"Here, why waste your time on this? I mean it isn't the relays that are the problem..."
"Tom-shut up."
"If it were then the whole warp core wouldn't be working..."
"Tom..."
"And it is..."
"Tom..."
"So it isn't the relays..."
"TOM"
"Which means it's the containment."
"TOM SHUT UP!"
"Okay, ow. Easy 'Lanna. Easy. Don't kill me don't oh, Jeez! Put the cutter down, 'Lanna, put it down, come on. Don't kill me, just put it down. You don't really want to kill me, do you?"
"Yes."
"'Lanna, please. Just. Put the cutters down. Jeez! That was close!"
"Stand still."
"OW! You cut me! 'Lanna, please. I'm sorry, okay. I'll shut up. You were right. It was the relays, just please, don't kill me. Get away from me with those will you, they're dangerous. Heck, you're dangerous."
"Hey, what're you guys doin'?"
"Harry, help me! I think she's gone nuts!"
"Nuts? Yeah right Tom. I don't think B'Elanna will ever go nuts."
"Oh yeah?"
"Wow! Okay, I could be wrong. B'Elanna please put those cutters down. Come on don't kill us."
"Why not?"
"Uh, Tom?"
"What?"
"I think we have a problem."
"No really? My half-Klingon fiance has gone nuts and cornered us, she is royally ticked off and coming at us with relay cutters. I don't see any problem with that, do you?"
"No."
"Tom, it was really nice knowing you. "
"Shut up. She isn't serious, is she?"
"She looks pretty serious."
"Then it was nice know'n ya Harry."
"This is it!"
*Laughing* "You guys are so stupid!"
"What?!"
"'Lanna, what are you talking about?"
"'Harry, help I think she's gone nuts' Tom you idiot, did you actually think I would kill you?"
"You were joking?"
"Yep. You should have seen the look on your faces."
"I can't believe you tricked us."
" Believe it Flyboy. Jeez, that was funny."
"No it wasn't."
" Actually it was a pretty good trick, come on Harry where's your sense of humor?"
"Maybe it got cut out by your royally ticked off insane half-Klingon fiance."
"That's not funny."
"Oh, come on Harry. Lighten up. She really fooled us."
"All right fine. I guess we were pretty stupid."
"You think?"
"Come on, 'Lanna, let's go get something to eat. You comin' Harry?"
"Sure wait up."
"What's Neelix making tonight?"
"It better not have any leola root in it."
"If it does we can reheat the picnic."
"Let's save that for later."
"Uh, guys? Let's not tell anyone about this."
"Yeah. 'Lanna? You're not going to hold this over my head for the rest of my life, are you?"
"Yep."
"'Lanna!"
"What? It would make a great toast at the wedding."
"'Lanna! You wouldn't."
"Yes, Tom. She would."
"Come on, B'Elanna. Please?"
"Fine, but I will never let you guys forget this."
"Great."
"No kidding."
