Title: Page 65 part 3: Worst nightmare
Author: Doc
Category: R, S, A
Key Words: Mulder/Scully Married, Alternate Universe
Summary: A parent's worst nightmare.
Dedication: Hey Didi, hey spooky. I am trying to get off of
it, but I can't!
Disclaimer: If I ran things, (which I don't) I'd have X
Files underwear. Okay, not really, but have I proved my
point?
Joshua Mulder woke up feeling off. Something was up, but he
couldn't quite picture it. He shrugged and rolled over, not
ready to face a new day. Today was auditions for the school
musical. They were doing something called "A funny thing
happened on the way to the forum." Personally, he'd never
heard it before. All he wanted to do was go back to sleep.
Fifteen minutes later, his four and a half-year-old sister
Rosie creeps into his bedroom. She gets right up to the bed.
"BOO!" she yells, as Josh jumps a bit.
"Jeesh, Rosie, you scared the living daylights out of me!"
he said, but he was smiling, so it was a pretty good sign.
He groaned, as he rolled over, onto the floor. He fell onto
his leg, and a yellow bruise was already starting to show.
"OWW!" he yelled, as he sighed.
'Breathe in, breathe out.' Josh thought to himself as
he looked into the bathroom mirror. 'You can do this.' He
said as he walked into the auditorium filled with 5th and 6th
graders. He only had time to make it to the trashcan. Then
he lost his breakfast.
"And I'm happy, happy that you're lovely. It's the one
thing you can give to me." Josh sang with enthusiasm, his
nerves had calmed down now. He then felt a trickle down his
nose. The girls in the audience gasped. He put a finger to
his nose and saw bright red. He felt the room spin. He was
ghostly pale and he felt nauseous again. His nosebleed came
faster and faster, with more blood. He never saw the stage
floor coming into contact with his head.
"I wuv you, you wuv me, we're a gweat big famawee."
Rosie sang as she swayed to the music. Her Barney toy was
right in front of her. Even at the age of four, she couldn't
pronounce her R's and her L's just yet.
"Rosie, what do you want for breakfast?" Dana asked, as she
yawned. She had to face that her little boy was growing up.
Now, he didn't want her at the bus stop in the mornings.
"Pancakes!" Rosie jumps up excitedly.
About a half an hour later, the kitchen was a mess, but
Dana's daughter was happy. Rosie made pancakes all by
herself (with just a little help from her mommy of course).
Lucy was happy too, eating all the pancakes that Rosie got
off the floor. The little brown and white mutt wagged her
tail happily, and hungrily. They had gotten Lucy a few days
after Buddy died. The kids were feeling down and Fox and
Dana just felt that they had to go down to the pound. They
say that Lucy is a mix between a collie and a shepherd, but
the people at the animal shelter weren't very sure.
"Tank too mommy!" Rosie says, as she engulfs her mother in a
big hug, getting flour on both of them. Times like these she
was so happy she was a mother.
Then, she got the phone call.
"Hello?"
"Hi, is this Mrs. Mulder?"
"Yes, who's this?"
"This is Mr. Stevens, Josh's drama teacher. Today durring
auditions for the musical, something happened to Josh." He
paused and a pain ran through Dana's stomach in panic.
"He got a bad nosebleed and passed out right on stage while
he was reading. I decided to go on the ambulance with him
while Mr. Russell stayed with the other children. I thought
that he needed somebody that he knew before you got here."
"Thank you, Mr. Stevens. What hospital is it?"
"Baylor Medical."
"I'm on my way." Dana said as she hung up the phone in
defeat. That was one of the worst phone calls a parent could
ever get.
"Come on, Rosie. Let's get your shoes on."
"But I'm not done with breakfast." She said, frowning.
"I'll explain it in the car, now come on." Dana said, trying
not to let her daughter know that something was terribly
wrong.
Dana sat in the hospital waiting room, head in her hands
trying to absorb everything. Rosie was sleeping right next
to her in one of the chairs. Then she hands on her
shoulders. She looked up to see her husband. His eyes were
filled with worry and uncertainty.
"Oh Mulder. He passed out." She said as she sighed, trying
to be strong. Mulder knew through her shield. He pulled her
into a hug. She tried to muffle her sobs, but Mulder knew.
He could feel in his heart that something was wrong.
Something that would change his life forever.
PART II:
"Mr. and Mrs. Mulder?"
Dana opened her eyes to see who was speaking. It was Dr.
Johnson, the kid's pediatrician. His face looked tired,
saddened almost. He sat in a chair across from them and
folded his hands.
'This can't be good if the doctor sits down' Mulder thought
to himself, his heart racing with every passing second of
silence.
Then the doctor spoke. "We aren't 100% sure, because we'll
have to do blood work. I've been talking to my colleagues
and we feel that he possibly could have leukemia." Scully
gasped and Mulder frowned.
"He's very weak, but very eager to see his family. He's in
room 310." The doctor paused. "I wish I'd had better news."
He said, as he left the hospital, ready to go back to his
normal practice.
"Mulder, do you realize that our only son could possibly
die?" Dana asked, as he nodded. His face showed no emotion.
He had to be the strong one, for Dana, for Josh, for Rosie,
and for himself.
The walked into the room silently. Dana took her son's hand
and sat down in the visitor's chair. He stirred slightly and
opened his eyes.
"Mom? Dad?" He said weakly. "I thought that you wouldn't
come, that you didn't love me. I was afraid that you
wouldn't come because I was too sick."
"Honey, why wouldn't we come? We love you so much that
nothing would keep us away."
"It hurts, Mom. My legs hurt so much." He said as he
squirmed, trying to get comfortable.
"I know, baby. I'll go get the nurse to go give you
something, okay? You stay here with Dad and Rosie okay?"
Dana said as she left.
"It's not like I'm going anywhere." He said, particularly to
no one.
Rosie climbed up on her daddy's lap and patted her brother's
red curly hair.
"Joshie, good puppy." She said. This made him smile.
"Thanks Rosie." He said and he felt just a little better.
The next few weeks were hell. Josh almost never got out
of bed except to go to the bathroom, due to the intense
pain. He'd fight with all his might when he had to go to the
hospital for chemo. He hated the needles and he hated being
sick all the time. He hated the doctors, he hated throwing
up, and loosing his hair, which came out in clumps when he
took a bath.
He had to go in for bloodwork today, to see if the
chemo and radiation treatment helped any. Unfortunately, the
leukemia and cancer cells were getting worse. They could put
Josh on the bone marrow transplant list, but because of his
rare blood type (Rh), it was not probable that he'd get a
transplant. The doctor gave Josh an estimate of six weeks at
most. He told Mulder and Scully while Rosie sat with Josh
inside. Dana looked in at them. Rosie had her head on Josh's
chest, her mind elsewhere. Dana got a flashback of when she
and Mulder were in this boat. But somehow, some way, no
matter how bad they were, Fox and Dana always were okay. But
this wasn't the case. No, unfortunately Mulder and Scully
couldn't do anything for their son, and they felt helpless.
Scully finally came to reality then, although she still
hoped for a miracle. She knew she may never see her son get
married, or go to the prom with the girl he likes. Worst of
all, he'd tried so hard, but he'd never gotten into a play.
Maybe she could call Mr. Stevens and Mr. Russell to try and
squeeze Josh in somewhere.
Josh actually did get his wish. He would be a minor
role of a sick slave in the chorus. Dana, Fox, and Rosie
were in the audience supporting him. The play ran smoothly
and at the end of the play, he thought he did something
wrong because people started chanting his name.
"Josh, Josh, Josh," they kept saying over and over, and he
wanted to go away. Then they picked him up and he opened his
eyes. The whole cast was holding him up. He opened his eyes
and felt taller. The audience was giving him a standing
ovation. From that moment in a child's eyes, he felt
happiness. His hazel eyes brimmed with tears. He belonged.
That happiness didn't last, though. He had to go back to the
hospital because of horrible pain in his head and he had a
cut that wouldn't clot properly. Back to needles, back to
the dark evil world of hospitals. The doctors warned Dana
and Fox that he could go at any time now.
One night, while Fox and Dana kissed him goodnight, he
waited until his father left the room when he called his mom
over.
"Mommy wait a sec." He said, an it reminded Dana of when he
was little. She went back over and took a stray strand of
red hair out of his eyes.
"Where did you get this?" he asked, as he pointed to her
cross.
"Oh this? Your father gave it to me when we were young. It's
customary. You want to know what it says? " She asked as he
nodded.
"The truth lies within you. Luv Spooky"
"You guys really love each other, don't you?" Josh asked,
"Yea, I do." Josh asked, as Dana kissed him on the forehead,
and told him that she loved him.
"Could you ask dad to come in here. I've got a question for
him." Josh asked as Dana nodded and said goodnight to her
perfect son.
"What's wrong, tiger?" Mulder asked, as he walked into
Josh's room. He'd called his son that since he was a baby.
"Tell me a story." He said, as he put his thin, bony hand in
his father's larger one.
"Which one?"
"The one about baseball." He said as he grinned.
"Okay. Once up on a time, there was a little boy about your
age. He loved baseball, but he wasn't very good. The team
said that he was the best batboy there ever was. He didn't
care if he didn't play. All he cared about was smelling the
sweet grass after it's just been mowed or hearing parents
cheer their kids on. He liked it, until some bullies said
that the only reason he wasn't on the team was because he
was a loser. This made the boy sad. He begged the coach at
the next game to let him play. When one of the players got
sick durring the game, the coach put the boy in his place.
He was the last to bat. 2 strikes, and 2 outs. One more out
and they'd loose the game. He walks to the plate and picks
up a bat that's much too big for his size. The pitcher
throws and crack, the ball hits the bat with force and
speed. It goes flying, and so does the boy. Homerun! As the
teammates come over to cheer him on, he goes over to the
losing team, and shakes the bully's hand.
'Good game, Bruno.' He said as he smiled.
The end." Mulder said as he saw Josh drift off to sleep with
dreams of baseball and lemonade on a warm summer day.
Then, the day came when it was time. He had specifically
requested that he died at home, not at a hospital like some
old person.
Lucy never left his side. Whenever he slept, she was at the
foot of his bed, watching him. Dana heard Josh talking to
the dog.
"Luce, I'm going to see Buddy real soon, okay? You need to
take good care of Rosie for me when I'm gone." He said, as
the dog licked his cheek with sympathy.
Dana entered, while Fox waited with Rosie outside. A little
sense of deja vu crossed her mind. This felt the same way
when we were putting Buddy down. She sat on her son's bed,
and stroked his hair.
"Mommy, tell me what God looks like." Josh suddenly asked.
Dana was taken by surprise.
"Well, He's warm and loving. He takes good care of you."
Dana said.
"I know that, I learned that in Sunday school. No, what does
god really look like?"
"I don't think that God has a physical face like you and me.
He's got a face of love. But I don't know what he really
looks like.
"I'll see what he looks like for you." Josh said as he
reached up and played with Dana's necklace. She felt the
clasp on the back of her neck, and took off the cross that
she had worn for over 20 years. She put it on her son.
"I want you to take good care of this for me, okay?" she
said as he smiled.
"I will, mom. I promise." He said as Fox and Rosie entered.
Rosie jumped on Josh's bed.
"Hey, Tiger. How you doing?"
"Pretty good, dad."
"Joshie going to see Jesus?" Rosie asked, as he smiled and
nodded.
"Joshie going to see buddy too?" she asked, as he nodded.
Then Rosie knew what that meant. Tears ran down her face as
she hugged her brother, not wanting him to go and never come
back.
"I promise, Rosie, we'll see each other again. One day, we
will I promise." Josh said, as he looked up at his parents.
"I'm tired, can I go to sleep yet?" He asked as Dana told
him that she and his father loved him.
"I want to hear dad say it." Josh said, as Mulder sat down
and looked him straight in the eye.
"I love you son. I've loved you ever since I saw your little
hazel eyes and I knew that you were my and nobody else's."
Mulder said as silent tears streamed down his face.
"I love you too, Dad." He said as he closed his eyes. Rosie
took this opportunity and got down on the floor, thinking
that he was sleeping.
"BOO!" she said, and he didn't move. Then he opened his eyes
slowly and turned to his little sister.
"You scared me there, Rose." He said softly. He closed his
eyes.
"We'll all be together some day." He whispered as the
portable EKG went monotone, the tears fell on Rosie's
cheeks, and Josh finally went home.
6 years later:
"Hey Josh, it's me. I just wanted to wish you a happy 14th
birthday. We all miss you so much. Lucy's not the same. She
lost that glow to her when you left, Josh. Mom found your
diary a few weeks ago, and she wouldn't stop crying. You
wrote beautiful poetry in there, Josh." Rosie had to stop
because of the tears that were blinding her vision. "No
matter what, Josh. You'll always be the best brother I've
always had." Rosie said as she put down the flowers and
picked up Lucy's leash. She was about to walk away, but then
she stopped and reached into her pocket.
"Oh yea. I found this yesterday while cleaning out the
attic. Best friends stick together, even when their time on
earth is through." She said as she put the collar down by
the tombstone. The tags on it read "Buddy." Rosie stopped to
look at her brother's tombstone.
Joshua Mulder
December 17th to June 23
Rosie walked away knowing that her big brother was safe,
warm, and throwing a ball to his best friend.
Mulder shot up in his bed, panting. "Mulder, what's wrong?
What is it?" His wife asked as she put a concerned hand on
his shoulder
"Josh. I have to see Josh." He said as he got up and then
got a head rush from getting up too fast.
"Mulder you had a bad dream. Come here and go back to bed."
Dana ordered, as she heard the bedroom door close. Sometimes
her husband could be so stubborn.
Mulder walked in to see his eight-year-old son in dreamland.
'That's what he looked like at the end of my dream' Mulder
thought and he made sure. Mulder tapped him, trying to wake
him up slowly.
"Dad?" Josh mumbled sleepily, blinded by the light. Mulder
hugged his son tightly, clinging to him, loving the fact
that his son was so warm.
"Dad, what's wrong?" he asked as he saw his father, the man
who he looked up to because he wasn't afraid of anything in
the world was crying.
"I'm sorry, Tiger. I just had a really bad dream. I dreamed
that I lost you." Mulder said as he looked at his son.
"It was only a dream, Dad. I'm safe, I'm here, and I'm not
going anywhere." Josh said as his father smiled.
"By the way, Dad, Can you take me to auditions for the
musical tomorrow?"
"As long as its not 'A Funny Thing happened on the way to
the Forum.'"
As father and son talk up until morning, all is peaceful at
the Mulder household. Well, at least until next time, that
is. ?
Author: Doc
Category: R, S, A
Key Words: Mulder/Scully Married, Alternate Universe
Summary: A parent's worst nightmare.
Dedication: Hey Didi, hey spooky. I am trying to get off of
it, but I can't!
Disclaimer: If I ran things, (which I don't) I'd have X
Files underwear. Okay, not really, but have I proved my
point?
Joshua Mulder woke up feeling off. Something was up, but he
couldn't quite picture it. He shrugged and rolled over, not
ready to face a new day. Today was auditions for the school
musical. They were doing something called "A funny thing
happened on the way to the forum." Personally, he'd never
heard it before. All he wanted to do was go back to sleep.
Fifteen minutes later, his four and a half-year-old sister
Rosie creeps into his bedroom. She gets right up to the bed.
"BOO!" she yells, as Josh jumps a bit.
"Jeesh, Rosie, you scared the living daylights out of me!"
he said, but he was smiling, so it was a pretty good sign.
He groaned, as he rolled over, onto the floor. He fell onto
his leg, and a yellow bruise was already starting to show.
"OWW!" he yelled, as he sighed.
'Breathe in, breathe out.' Josh thought to himself as
he looked into the bathroom mirror. 'You can do this.' He
said as he walked into the auditorium filled with 5th and 6th
graders. He only had time to make it to the trashcan. Then
he lost his breakfast.
"And I'm happy, happy that you're lovely. It's the one
thing you can give to me." Josh sang with enthusiasm, his
nerves had calmed down now. He then felt a trickle down his
nose. The girls in the audience gasped. He put a finger to
his nose and saw bright red. He felt the room spin. He was
ghostly pale and he felt nauseous again. His nosebleed came
faster and faster, with more blood. He never saw the stage
floor coming into contact with his head.
"I wuv you, you wuv me, we're a gweat big famawee."
Rosie sang as she swayed to the music. Her Barney toy was
right in front of her. Even at the age of four, she couldn't
pronounce her R's and her L's just yet.
"Rosie, what do you want for breakfast?" Dana asked, as she
yawned. She had to face that her little boy was growing up.
Now, he didn't want her at the bus stop in the mornings.
"Pancakes!" Rosie jumps up excitedly.
About a half an hour later, the kitchen was a mess, but
Dana's daughter was happy. Rosie made pancakes all by
herself (with just a little help from her mommy of course).
Lucy was happy too, eating all the pancakes that Rosie got
off the floor. The little brown and white mutt wagged her
tail happily, and hungrily. They had gotten Lucy a few days
after Buddy died. The kids were feeling down and Fox and
Dana just felt that they had to go down to the pound. They
say that Lucy is a mix between a collie and a shepherd, but
the people at the animal shelter weren't very sure.
"Tank too mommy!" Rosie says, as she engulfs her mother in a
big hug, getting flour on both of them. Times like these she
was so happy she was a mother.
Then, she got the phone call.
"Hello?"
"Hi, is this Mrs. Mulder?"
"Yes, who's this?"
"This is Mr. Stevens, Josh's drama teacher. Today durring
auditions for the musical, something happened to Josh." He
paused and a pain ran through Dana's stomach in panic.
"He got a bad nosebleed and passed out right on stage while
he was reading. I decided to go on the ambulance with him
while Mr. Russell stayed with the other children. I thought
that he needed somebody that he knew before you got here."
"Thank you, Mr. Stevens. What hospital is it?"
"Baylor Medical."
"I'm on my way." Dana said as she hung up the phone in
defeat. That was one of the worst phone calls a parent could
ever get.
"Come on, Rosie. Let's get your shoes on."
"But I'm not done with breakfast." She said, frowning.
"I'll explain it in the car, now come on." Dana said, trying
not to let her daughter know that something was terribly
wrong.
Dana sat in the hospital waiting room, head in her hands
trying to absorb everything. Rosie was sleeping right next
to her in one of the chairs. Then she hands on her
shoulders. She looked up to see her husband. His eyes were
filled with worry and uncertainty.
"Oh Mulder. He passed out." She said as she sighed, trying
to be strong. Mulder knew through her shield. He pulled her
into a hug. She tried to muffle her sobs, but Mulder knew.
He could feel in his heart that something was wrong.
Something that would change his life forever.
PART II:
"Mr. and Mrs. Mulder?"
Dana opened her eyes to see who was speaking. It was Dr.
Johnson, the kid's pediatrician. His face looked tired,
saddened almost. He sat in a chair across from them and
folded his hands.
'This can't be good if the doctor sits down' Mulder thought
to himself, his heart racing with every passing second of
silence.
Then the doctor spoke. "We aren't 100% sure, because we'll
have to do blood work. I've been talking to my colleagues
and we feel that he possibly could have leukemia." Scully
gasped and Mulder frowned.
"He's very weak, but very eager to see his family. He's in
room 310." The doctor paused. "I wish I'd had better news."
He said, as he left the hospital, ready to go back to his
normal practice.
"Mulder, do you realize that our only son could possibly
die?" Dana asked, as he nodded. His face showed no emotion.
He had to be the strong one, for Dana, for Josh, for Rosie,
and for himself.
The walked into the room silently. Dana took her son's hand
and sat down in the visitor's chair. He stirred slightly and
opened his eyes.
"Mom? Dad?" He said weakly. "I thought that you wouldn't
come, that you didn't love me. I was afraid that you
wouldn't come because I was too sick."
"Honey, why wouldn't we come? We love you so much that
nothing would keep us away."
"It hurts, Mom. My legs hurt so much." He said as he
squirmed, trying to get comfortable.
"I know, baby. I'll go get the nurse to go give you
something, okay? You stay here with Dad and Rosie okay?"
Dana said as she left.
"It's not like I'm going anywhere." He said, particularly to
no one.
Rosie climbed up on her daddy's lap and patted her brother's
red curly hair.
"Joshie, good puppy." She said. This made him smile.
"Thanks Rosie." He said and he felt just a little better.
The next few weeks were hell. Josh almost never got out
of bed except to go to the bathroom, due to the intense
pain. He'd fight with all his might when he had to go to the
hospital for chemo. He hated the needles and he hated being
sick all the time. He hated the doctors, he hated throwing
up, and loosing his hair, which came out in clumps when he
took a bath.
He had to go in for bloodwork today, to see if the
chemo and radiation treatment helped any. Unfortunately, the
leukemia and cancer cells were getting worse. They could put
Josh on the bone marrow transplant list, but because of his
rare blood type (Rh), it was not probable that he'd get a
transplant. The doctor gave Josh an estimate of six weeks at
most. He told Mulder and Scully while Rosie sat with Josh
inside. Dana looked in at them. Rosie had her head on Josh's
chest, her mind elsewhere. Dana got a flashback of when she
and Mulder were in this boat. But somehow, some way, no
matter how bad they were, Fox and Dana always were okay. But
this wasn't the case. No, unfortunately Mulder and Scully
couldn't do anything for their son, and they felt helpless.
Scully finally came to reality then, although she still
hoped for a miracle. She knew she may never see her son get
married, or go to the prom with the girl he likes. Worst of
all, he'd tried so hard, but he'd never gotten into a play.
Maybe she could call Mr. Stevens and Mr. Russell to try and
squeeze Josh in somewhere.
Josh actually did get his wish. He would be a minor
role of a sick slave in the chorus. Dana, Fox, and Rosie
were in the audience supporting him. The play ran smoothly
and at the end of the play, he thought he did something
wrong because people started chanting his name.
"Josh, Josh, Josh," they kept saying over and over, and he
wanted to go away. Then they picked him up and he opened his
eyes. The whole cast was holding him up. He opened his eyes
and felt taller. The audience was giving him a standing
ovation. From that moment in a child's eyes, he felt
happiness. His hazel eyes brimmed with tears. He belonged.
That happiness didn't last, though. He had to go back to the
hospital because of horrible pain in his head and he had a
cut that wouldn't clot properly. Back to needles, back to
the dark evil world of hospitals. The doctors warned Dana
and Fox that he could go at any time now.
One night, while Fox and Dana kissed him goodnight, he
waited until his father left the room when he called his mom
over.
"Mommy wait a sec." He said, an it reminded Dana of when he
was little. She went back over and took a stray strand of
red hair out of his eyes.
"Where did you get this?" he asked, as he pointed to her
cross.
"Oh this? Your father gave it to me when we were young. It's
customary. You want to know what it says? " She asked as he
nodded.
"The truth lies within you. Luv Spooky"
"You guys really love each other, don't you?" Josh asked,
"Yea, I do." Josh asked, as Dana kissed him on the forehead,
and told him that she loved him.
"Could you ask dad to come in here. I've got a question for
him." Josh asked as Dana nodded and said goodnight to her
perfect son.
"What's wrong, tiger?" Mulder asked, as he walked into
Josh's room. He'd called his son that since he was a baby.
"Tell me a story." He said, as he put his thin, bony hand in
his father's larger one.
"Which one?"
"The one about baseball." He said as he grinned.
"Okay. Once up on a time, there was a little boy about your
age. He loved baseball, but he wasn't very good. The team
said that he was the best batboy there ever was. He didn't
care if he didn't play. All he cared about was smelling the
sweet grass after it's just been mowed or hearing parents
cheer their kids on. He liked it, until some bullies said
that the only reason he wasn't on the team was because he
was a loser. This made the boy sad. He begged the coach at
the next game to let him play. When one of the players got
sick durring the game, the coach put the boy in his place.
He was the last to bat. 2 strikes, and 2 outs. One more out
and they'd loose the game. He walks to the plate and picks
up a bat that's much too big for his size. The pitcher
throws and crack, the ball hits the bat with force and
speed. It goes flying, and so does the boy. Homerun! As the
teammates come over to cheer him on, he goes over to the
losing team, and shakes the bully's hand.
'Good game, Bruno.' He said as he smiled.
The end." Mulder said as he saw Josh drift off to sleep with
dreams of baseball and lemonade on a warm summer day.
Then, the day came when it was time. He had specifically
requested that he died at home, not at a hospital like some
old person.
Lucy never left his side. Whenever he slept, she was at the
foot of his bed, watching him. Dana heard Josh talking to
the dog.
"Luce, I'm going to see Buddy real soon, okay? You need to
take good care of Rosie for me when I'm gone." He said, as
the dog licked his cheek with sympathy.
Dana entered, while Fox waited with Rosie outside. A little
sense of deja vu crossed her mind. This felt the same way
when we were putting Buddy down. She sat on her son's bed,
and stroked his hair.
"Mommy, tell me what God looks like." Josh suddenly asked.
Dana was taken by surprise.
"Well, He's warm and loving. He takes good care of you."
Dana said.
"I know that, I learned that in Sunday school. No, what does
god really look like?"
"I don't think that God has a physical face like you and me.
He's got a face of love. But I don't know what he really
looks like.
"I'll see what he looks like for you." Josh said as he
reached up and played with Dana's necklace. She felt the
clasp on the back of her neck, and took off the cross that
she had worn for over 20 years. She put it on her son.
"I want you to take good care of this for me, okay?" she
said as he smiled.
"I will, mom. I promise." He said as Fox and Rosie entered.
Rosie jumped on Josh's bed.
"Hey, Tiger. How you doing?"
"Pretty good, dad."
"Joshie going to see Jesus?" Rosie asked, as he smiled and
nodded.
"Joshie going to see buddy too?" she asked, as he nodded.
Then Rosie knew what that meant. Tears ran down her face as
she hugged her brother, not wanting him to go and never come
back.
"I promise, Rosie, we'll see each other again. One day, we
will I promise." Josh said, as he looked up at his parents.
"I'm tired, can I go to sleep yet?" He asked as Dana told
him that she and his father loved him.
"I want to hear dad say it." Josh said, as Mulder sat down
and looked him straight in the eye.
"I love you son. I've loved you ever since I saw your little
hazel eyes and I knew that you were my and nobody else's."
Mulder said as silent tears streamed down his face.
"I love you too, Dad." He said as he closed his eyes. Rosie
took this opportunity and got down on the floor, thinking
that he was sleeping.
"BOO!" she said, and he didn't move. Then he opened his eyes
slowly and turned to his little sister.
"You scared me there, Rose." He said softly. He closed his
eyes.
"We'll all be together some day." He whispered as the
portable EKG went monotone, the tears fell on Rosie's
cheeks, and Josh finally went home.
6 years later:
"Hey Josh, it's me. I just wanted to wish you a happy 14th
birthday. We all miss you so much. Lucy's not the same. She
lost that glow to her when you left, Josh. Mom found your
diary a few weeks ago, and she wouldn't stop crying. You
wrote beautiful poetry in there, Josh." Rosie had to stop
because of the tears that were blinding her vision. "No
matter what, Josh. You'll always be the best brother I've
always had." Rosie said as she put down the flowers and
picked up Lucy's leash. She was about to walk away, but then
she stopped and reached into her pocket.
"Oh yea. I found this yesterday while cleaning out the
attic. Best friends stick together, even when their time on
earth is through." She said as she put the collar down by
the tombstone. The tags on it read "Buddy." Rosie stopped to
look at her brother's tombstone.
Joshua Mulder
December 17th to June 23
Rosie walked away knowing that her big brother was safe,
warm, and throwing a ball to his best friend.
Mulder shot up in his bed, panting. "Mulder, what's wrong?
What is it?" His wife asked as she put a concerned hand on
his shoulder
"Josh. I have to see Josh." He said as he got up and then
got a head rush from getting up too fast.
"Mulder you had a bad dream. Come here and go back to bed."
Dana ordered, as she heard the bedroom door close. Sometimes
her husband could be so stubborn.
Mulder walked in to see his eight-year-old son in dreamland.
'That's what he looked like at the end of my dream' Mulder
thought and he made sure. Mulder tapped him, trying to wake
him up slowly.
"Dad?" Josh mumbled sleepily, blinded by the light. Mulder
hugged his son tightly, clinging to him, loving the fact
that his son was so warm.
"Dad, what's wrong?" he asked as he saw his father, the man
who he looked up to because he wasn't afraid of anything in
the world was crying.
"I'm sorry, Tiger. I just had a really bad dream. I dreamed
that I lost you." Mulder said as he looked at his son.
"It was only a dream, Dad. I'm safe, I'm here, and I'm not
going anywhere." Josh said as his father smiled.
"By the way, Dad, Can you take me to auditions for the
musical tomorrow?"
"As long as its not 'A Funny Thing happened on the way to
the Forum.'"
As father and son talk up until morning, all is peaceful at
the Mulder household. Well, at least until next time, that
is. ?
