Kit sat holding Buddha's hand. It had been two days since they had been
attacked by the Johansen's and he hadn't woken up yet. "Buddha, I am so
sorry. I should have told you about them before we left. It's all my fault
you're like this. Buddha I love you, please you have to wake up. I can't
survive this without you."
"What the heck are you doing here?" Kit turned toward the angry voice and was surprised to see Josh standing in the doorway glaring at her. "Haven't you done enough? It's your fault he is like this. If he hadn't taken you out he wouldn't be here." The anger and distress showed plainly on Josh's face but Kit only heard the anger. "You don't deserve to be in here, you almost killed him. Get out."
Josh roughly grabbed her arm and pulled her up, Kit flinched as he pushed into her old bruises. He pushed her toward the door. Kit felt tears well in her eyes as she looked back at the bed before Josh obstructed her view. "I said to get out."
Kit left then not wanting to let Josh see her cry. She made it to her room and threw herself on her bed before letting out her tears in waves of guilt and fear. She didn't hear Karen knock on the door or Wil stick his head in to call her to dinner.
When Cray came in to check on her, he found she was no longer crying. He looked at her taking in the puffy eyes, disheveled hair, and hiccups from the tears, before sitting down on the bed and gathering her into a hug, "Kit, Josh is just frustrated and worried about Buddha. He doesn't know what he is saying. When Buddha wakes up I am sure he will asks for forgiveness for the way he has been acting."
"No he won't. Josh never asks for forgiveness or apologizes for anything even when he is wrong. Don't give me that crap." Kit swiped at her eyes, "I can't be here anymore Cray. I am going home."
"Kit you can't just leave, what if he wakes up? You need to be here for him." Cray tried to reason.
"I am the reason he is like that, hopefully if I leave the Johansen's won't come after you guys." Kit stood up and pulled out her carpetbag. "I am going home. If he wakes up tell him I'll be here as soon as possible then come get me. I have something to tell him and he needs to know."
Cray nodded sadly as he watched her pack her belongings, "What is so important?"
Kit shook her head, "He needs to know first."
"Do you want me to go out with you?"
"No I don't want to cause you to get hurt cause of me. I'll be fine. I'll leave in the morning before everyone wakes up. Don't tell anyone I have gone till they are up okay?" Kit's voice quavered as she spoke.
"Kit you need to know I don't agree with you on this." Cray started to protest.
"I know you don't but I need you to do this for me. I can't stay here it is too dangerous."
"Kit we can protect you. Please stay around till Buddha wakes up." Cray tried one last time to get her to stay.
"No I won't have any more people hurt because of me. I am going. Just come and get me when he wakes up okay?"
"Fine, but I am going out with you. There is no way you are walking out to the farm on your own."
Kit sighed and nodded, "Fine we'll leave tomorrow morning early."
"I'll meet you in the hall at dawn okay?"
"Yeah sure. See you in the morning."
Kit watched Cray leave before changing for bed. She didn't fall asleep till late that night, spending most of the night tossing and turning trying to come to terms with life as it was. Here she was pregnant, and now it looked like she was going to have to raise her baby on her own. She began to cry again, knowing that if Sid found out she would out of the house before she could blink.
She was up and ready long before Cray softly knocked on her door the next morning. For the most part the trip was completed in silence and the pace they kept had them arriving at the house before lunch.
The dogs barked out a greeting as the two came walking up. Both Cray and Kit rubbed the dogs' heads and patted them, before moving closer to the house. Sid had come out of the barn when the dogs had begun warning of visitors and wiped off his hand on a cloth as the two walked into the yard.
"Morning Son, Ami. What brings you out to the farm?" Sid cut through the pleasantries in his normal abrupt manner. "I thought you wouldn't be back for another month."
"Well Pa there was some trouble in town and Ki-" Cray stopped himself short knowing how his father felt about the nicknames they used. "I mean Ami felt safer coming home."
"What sort of trouble." Sid asked as they began walking toward the house. Before either Kit or Cray could answer him the three girls came running out of the house, attacking both Kit and Cray in a shower of hugs and questions. "Girls" Sid's stern voice cut through the girlish voices, "I was talking to them. Go back in and tell Rose that they are here."
Kit looked up from where she was talking with Heather, "I'll go in with them Sid and leave you and Crale to talk." Kit didn't wait for permission and lead the girls in answering their questions and listening to their tales from the past month.
"Well come out to the barn then you can help me with the chores and tell me why you brought Ami back to the farm." Sid motioned his son and the two men walked to the barn as Cray began to explain why they had come out to the farm.
"Like I said we ran into trouble in town. One of the Johansen boys has his eye on Ami. Ami didn't exactly welcome his advances and they threatened Ami as well as Jeremy and the rest of us unless Ami agreed to date the one boy. Well Ami and Jeremy were coming home from dinner a couple nights ago and they were attacked. Jeremy hasn't woken up yet and Josh is taking it really hard. The doctor expects him to pull through. Ami thinks that her being out here will prevent the rest of us from getting hurt. I couldn't stop her from coming out. Hopefully it will do her some good."
"It might, I guess the girls will at least get her attention moved somewhere else. Anything happen with the Johansen boys?"
"No sir we took it to the sheriff but they denied it. He says that unless Jeremy can identify them as his attackers then he can't do anything. Don't know why they don't take Ami's word, she was there too."
"Don't know boy. Well I am sure your ma would like to see you before you head back."
"Yes sir, I have to head back soon though, I work on Monday." Sid just nodded as they went into the house.
Rose had set out some food for the men and shooed the young girls off to play as she went up with Kit to unpack. Kit didn't say much just that Buddha was hurt and that she had come home to be safe. Rose didn't question her explanation figuring that she would say something when she was ready. Cray came up before he left to say good bye and promised Kit to come for her when Buddha woke up.
For the next two weeks Kit worked around the house falling into the chores she had done all winter. While she tried to act normal around the girls at night she cried herself to sleep and each morning she was up early with morning sickness. As the days past she rarely talked unless spoken to and even when she smiled it never reached her eyes. While neither Rose or Sid said anything to the girl it was obvious that they were waiting for her to "get back to normal."
Finally Sid had enough and confronted Kit one morning as she helped with the chores.
"Ami this has gone on enough. You decided to come here and now you have to deal with the consequences. This entire going around sighing and moping is doing neither you nor Jeremy any good. So at least try to act more like an adult."
Kit looked at her uncle in surprise, then quickly shuttered her eyes to hide the anger that she was feeling, "Yes sir."
Sid nodded feeling pretty proud of himself, and as Kit began to interact more with the world around the farm he felt he had done the right thing.
It was about a week later when the dogs began to bark a warning of a visitor. Kit came out of her old house, which she had been cleaning in anticipation of the guys' return at the end of the month. She raised a hand to see who was coming, she then broke into a run after seeing it was Cray.
"Is he awake? Please tell me he is awake." She said as they walked closer to the main farmhouse.
"Yeah he is awake, don't jerk my arm off. I told you I would come and get you when he woke up didn't I?"
"So is he asking for me? Or doesn't he want to see me?" Kit's face fell when Cray was slow to answer.
"He wants to see you Kit; but Kit you need to know that not everything is okay. The doctor says that he is healthy for a guy who hasn't been awake for almost a month. But he is asking for you. I promised to bring you back. He's already talked to the Sheriff, and told him that it was Shoe and Frost. So it is safe for you to come back and everything."
"Let me go get my stuff and we can head back." Kit called out over her shoulder as she ran to get her already packed bag.
Sid came out of the barn and went up to his son watching Kit run into the house. "What is this all about boy?"
"Jeremy is asking to see Ami. I promised him that I would bring her." Cray said as he turned to talk to his father.
"Why did you do that? She was just getting back to normal and you are taking her back. I won't let her go." Sid set his jaw as he spoke to his oldest son, neither saw Kit coming up till she spoke up.
"Uncle Sid Jeremy is my boyfriend, practically my fiancé. I need to be there. It is safe for me to go back I am going."
"No you ain't. This business with you and that boy has been going on enough. I am not gonna allow you to go back into town."
"You aren't going to allow me to go back into town? How are you going to stop me?"
"I am your guardian and what I say goes."
"I am almost an adult I can make my own decisions about where I go and who I spend time with. Plus I need to talk to him and you can't stop me from going."
"Not while you live under my roof and you eat from my labor it ain't."
"Then maybe I should move out from under your roof."
"You leave this farm Ami and you can never come back."
"Fine then can stay in my parents' house."
"No you won't that is part of my land until William comes of age. You won't be able to set foot on this land ever again."
"Fine then I don't need to stay were I am not wanted." Kit turned on her heel before Cray could catch her and started walking in the general direction of Lincoln.
"Boy she isn't allowed back you hear?" Sid spoke through clenched teeth.
"I can't believe you are doing this, she just wants to see her boyfriend. You are acting like she wants to leave for Chicago or something."
"Boy you are on dangerous ground." Sid said turning to his son.
"I am going to finish this. She is right you know, you have been totally unreasonable. It wasn't as if she was left to live on her own, but you have treated her as if she is selling her body on the streets. All she is doing is selling newspapers, something you have let us boys do since we were old enough to do it."
"That's enough Crale." Sid looked as if he was ready to punch his son, "If that is the way you feel none of you are welcome back on this farm as long as I live. You are no longer my son, she is no longer my niece. I have no sons." Sid spoke harshly before turning his back on his son and walking into the house.
Cray had no response but stood watching his father's retreating back. If his father wanted them out of his life then they would respect his wishes. Leaving behind his sister and mother and the girls would be hard but what could be done? Slowly as the meaning sunk in he turned to follow Kit toward Lincoln.
"What the heck are you doing here?" Kit turned toward the angry voice and was surprised to see Josh standing in the doorway glaring at her. "Haven't you done enough? It's your fault he is like this. If he hadn't taken you out he wouldn't be here." The anger and distress showed plainly on Josh's face but Kit only heard the anger. "You don't deserve to be in here, you almost killed him. Get out."
Josh roughly grabbed her arm and pulled her up, Kit flinched as he pushed into her old bruises. He pushed her toward the door. Kit felt tears well in her eyes as she looked back at the bed before Josh obstructed her view. "I said to get out."
Kit left then not wanting to let Josh see her cry. She made it to her room and threw herself on her bed before letting out her tears in waves of guilt and fear. She didn't hear Karen knock on the door or Wil stick his head in to call her to dinner.
When Cray came in to check on her, he found she was no longer crying. He looked at her taking in the puffy eyes, disheveled hair, and hiccups from the tears, before sitting down on the bed and gathering her into a hug, "Kit, Josh is just frustrated and worried about Buddha. He doesn't know what he is saying. When Buddha wakes up I am sure he will asks for forgiveness for the way he has been acting."
"No he won't. Josh never asks for forgiveness or apologizes for anything even when he is wrong. Don't give me that crap." Kit swiped at her eyes, "I can't be here anymore Cray. I am going home."
"Kit you can't just leave, what if he wakes up? You need to be here for him." Cray tried to reason.
"I am the reason he is like that, hopefully if I leave the Johansen's won't come after you guys." Kit stood up and pulled out her carpetbag. "I am going home. If he wakes up tell him I'll be here as soon as possible then come get me. I have something to tell him and he needs to know."
Cray nodded sadly as he watched her pack her belongings, "What is so important?"
Kit shook her head, "He needs to know first."
"Do you want me to go out with you?"
"No I don't want to cause you to get hurt cause of me. I'll be fine. I'll leave in the morning before everyone wakes up. Don't tell anyone I have gone till they are up okay?" Kit's voice quavered as she spoke.
"Kit you need to know I don't agree with you on this." Cray started to protest.
"I know you don't but I need you to do this for me. I can't stay here it is too dangerous."
"Kit we can protect you. Please stay around till Buddha wakes up." Cray tried one last time to get her to stay.
"No I won't have any more people hurt because of me. I am going. Just come and get me when he wakes up okay?"
"Fine, but I am going out with you. There is no way you are walking out to the farm on your own."
Kit sighed and nodded, "Fine we'll leave tomorrow morning early."
"I'll meet you in the hall at dawn okay?"
"Yeah sure. See you in the morning."
Kit watched Cray leave before changing for bed. She didn't fall asleep till late that night, spending most of the night tossing and turning trying to come to terms with life as it was. Here she was pregnant, and now it looked like she was going to have to raise her baby on her own. She began to cry again, knowing that if Sid found out she would out of the house before she could blink.
She was up and ready long before Cray softly knocked on her door the next morning. For the most part the trip was completed in silence and the pace they kept had them arriving at the house before lunch.
The dogs barked out a greeting as the two came walking up. Both Cray and Kit rubbed the dogs' heads and patted them, before moving closer to the house. Sid had come out of the barn when the dogs had begun warning of visitors and wiped off his hand on a cloth as the two walked into the yard.
"Morning Son, Ami. What brings you out to the farm?" Sid cut through the pleasantries in his normal abrupt manner. "I thought you wouldn't be back for another month."
"Well Pa there was some trouble in town and Ki-" Cray stopped himself short knowing how his father felt about the nicknames they used. "I mean Ami felt safer coming home."
"What sort of trouble." Sid asked as they began walking toward the house. Before either Kit or Cray could answer him the three girls came running out of the house, attacking both Kit and Cray in a shower of hugs and questions. "Girls" Sid's stern voice cut through the girlish voices, "I was talking to them. Go back in and tell Rose that they are here."
Kit looked up from where she was talking with Heather, "I'll go in with them Sid and leave you and Crale to talk." Kit didn't wait for permission and lead the girls in answering their questions and listening to their tales from the past month.
"Well come out to the barn then you can help me with the chores and tell me why you brought Ami back to the farm." Sid motioned his son and the two men walked to the barn as Cray began to explain why they had come out to the farm.
"Like I said we ran into trouble in town. One of the Johansen boys has his eye on Ami. Ami didn't exactly welcome his advances and they threatened Ami as well as Jeremy and the rest of us unless Ami agreed to date the one boy. Well Ami and Jeremy were coming home from dinner a couple nights ago and they were attacked. Jeremy hasn't woken up yet and Josh is taking it really hard. The doctor expects him to pull through. Ami thinks that her being out here will prevent the rest of us from getting hurt. I couldn't stop her from coming out. Hopefully it will do her some good."
"It might, I guess the girls will at least get her attention moved somewhere else. Anything happen with the Johansen boys?"
"No sir we took it to the sheriff but they denied it. He says that unless Jeremy can identify them as his attackers then he can't do anything. Don't know why they don't take Ami's word, she was there too."
"Don't know boy. Well I am sure your ma would like to see you before you head back."
"Yes sir, I have to head back soon though, I work on Monday." Sid just nodded as they went into the house.
Rose had set out some food for the men and shooed the young girls off to play as she went up with Kit to unpack. Kit didn't say much just that Buddha was hurt and that she had come home to be safe. Rose didn't question her explanation figuring that she would say something when she was ready. Cray came up before he left to say good bye and promised Kit to come for her when Buddha woke up.
For the next two weeks Kit worked around the house falling into the chores she had done all winter. While she tried to act normal around the girls at night she cried herself to sleep and each morning she was up early with morning sickness. As the days past she rarely talked unless spoken to and even when she smiled it never reached her eyes. While neither Rose or Sid said anything to the girl it was obvious that they were waiting for her to "get back to normal."
Finally Sid had enough and confronted Kit one morning as she helped with the chores.
"Ami this has gone on enough. You decided to come here and now you have to deal with the consequences. This entire going around sighing and moping is doing neither you nor Jeremy any good. So at least try to act more like an adult."
Kit looked at her uncle in surprise, then quickly shuttered her eyes to hide the anger that she was feeling, "Yes sir."
Sid nodded feeling pretty proud of himself, and as Kit began to interact more with the world around the farm he felt he had done the right thing.
It was about a week later when the dogs began to bark a warning of a visitor. Kit came out of her old house, which she had been cleaning in anticipation of the guys' return at the end of the month. She raised a hand to see who was coming, she then broke into a run after seeing it was Cray.
"Is he awake? Please tell me he is awake." She said as they walked closer to the main farmhouse.
"Yeah he is awake, don't jerk my arm off. I told you I would come and get you when he woke up didn't I?"
"So is he asking for me? Or doesn't he want to see me?" Kit's face fell when Cray was slow to answer.
"He wants to see you Kit; but Kit you need to know that not everything is okay. The doctor says that he is healthy for a guy who hasn't been awake for almost a month. But he is asking for you. I promised to bring you back. He's already talked to the Sheriff, and told him that it was Shoe and Frost. So it is safe for you to come back and everything."
"Let me go get my stuff and we can head back." Kit called out over her shoulder as she ran to get her already packed bag.
Sid came out of the barn and went up to his son watching Kit run into the house. "What is this all about boy?"
"Jeremy is asking to see Ami. I promised him that I would bring her." Cray said as he turned to talk to his father.
"Why did you do that? She was just getting back to normal and you are taking her back. I won't let her go." Sid set his jaw as he spoke to his oldest son, neither saw Kit coming up till she spoke up.
"Uncle Sid Jeremy is my boyfriend, practically my fiancé. I need to be there. It is safe for me to go back I am going."
"No you ain't. This business with you and that boy has been going on enough. I am not gonna allow you to go back into town."
"You aren't going to allow me to go back into town? How are you going to stop me?"
"I am your guardian and what I say goes."
"I am almost an adult I can make my own decisions about where I go and who I spend time with. Plus I need to talk to him and you can't stop me from going."
"Not while you live under my roof and you eat from my labor it ain't."
"Then maybe I should move out from under your roof."
"You leave this farm Ami and you can never come back."
"Fine then can stay in my parents' house."
"No you won't that is part of my land until William comes of age. You won't be able to set foot on this land ever again."
"Fine then I don't need to stay were I am not wanted." Kit turned on her heel before Cray could catch her and started walking in the general direction of Lincoln.
"Boy she isn't allowed back you hear?" Sid spoke through clenched teeth.
"I can't believe you are doing this, she just wants to see her boyfriend. You are acting like she wants to leave for Chicago or something."
"Boy you are on dangerous ground." Sid said turning to his son.
"I am going to finish this. She is right you know, you have been totally unreasonable. It wasn't as if she was left to live on her own, but you have treated her as if she is selling her body on the streets. All she is doing is selling newspapers, something you have let us boys do since we were old enough to do it."
"That's enough Crale." Sid looked as if he was ready to punch his son, "If that is the way you feel none of you are welcome back on this farm as long as I live. You are no longer my son, she is no longer my niece. I have no sons." Sid spoke harshly before turning his back on his son and walking into the house.
Cray had no response but stood watching his father's retreating back. If his father wanted them out of his life then they would respect his wishes. Leaving behind his sister and mother and the girls would be hard but what could be done? Slowly as the meaning sunk in he turned to follow Kit toward Lincoln.
