SQUALL
My rival. Always and forever. No matter what, I don't think there will ever be a time when I'm not competing against him. I don't hate him though. I never have. He just pisses me off. He's so successful, so respected, so loved. Everything that I'm not. He always wins...and I always lose. He's trusted...and I never will be. He's respected...and I'm looked down on. I guess everyone needs an opposite...and I got Squall.
I'm still inclined to believe that I'm a much better fighter than he is...that I've got more inborn talent. No one else would agree with me though...oh well. I think that if he wouldn't have had help the last few times we fought…I could have beaten him. Maybe I'm wrong, but I can pretend...right? He practices with me now...he says that the monsters in the Training Area are too weak for the both of us. Who knows? It surprised me at first...that he would want to have anything to do with me. Then again, he had welcomed me back to Garden in a decidedly Un-Squall-like fashion. But to spend his free time letting me beat the shit out of him...and vice versa...some people, including myself, have never understood.
He's changed. He's not so quiet and introverted anymore. That's my job now. I think it has something to do with Rinoa. She's changed him...for the better I guess. He's more open with his feelings...with his opinions...with his friends. I even saw him kissing Rinoa in the hall the other day. Freaky really. Never thought of him like that until I saw it. He's not so cold anymore. Maybe that's why he let me come back. Maybe he felt sorry for me...pitied me. I don't want that, but I think I got it anyway. I'll deal with it. I have to. He'd never come out and say that he felt sorry for me though...he's smarter than that.
Alright. I'll admit it. Squall is...hot. Well, that wasn't as hard as I thought it would be. Then again, I'm not actually saying it out loud to anyone. I'm writing it. But it's true. He is. Especially with that scar I gave him. Makes him look tough...which helps since he looks so much like a girl. He's pretty...not handsome, but he's pretty in a masculine sort of way. I'd never mistake him for a girl...but I'd never fear for my life if I met him for the first time in a dark alley. He seems so fragile...but I know better than that. I used to like him...so much that I dreamt about him. About us. There were so many versions...in the shower...in the training area...in my dorm. The only thing that was the same...was that it was us...and I was in charge. I think back on those dreams now...and they do nothing for me. It used to be that I couldn't do that...I'd get all "hot and bothered". Sometimes I couldn't even look at him. But now...I don't think of him like that anymore...despite the fact he's bloody good looking. I've moved on.
I remember growing up with him now. I picked on him then...and I pick on him now. I used to get him close to tears when he was little...but he never actually cried in front of me. All I ever wanted was for him to talk to me...guess I just went about it in a different way than everyone else. When we got older...the same tactic pissed him off...I thought it was kinda funny. He sort of just ignores it now, or he taunts me back. I don't think I'll ever get used to that.
My rival. Always and forever. No matter what, I don't think there will ever be a time when I'm not competing against him. I don't hate him though. I never have. He just pisses me off. He's so successful, so respected, so loved. Everything that I'm not. He always wins...and I always lose. He's trusted...and I never will be. He's respected...and I'm looked down on. I guess everyone needs an opposite...and I got Squall.
I'm still inclined to believe that I'm a much better fighter than he is...that I've got more inborn talent. No one else would agree with me though...oh well. I think that if he wouldn't have had help the last few times we fought…I could have beaten him. Maybe I'm wrong, but I can pretend...right? He practices with me now...he says that the monsters in the Training Area are too weak for the both of us. Who knows? It surprised me at first...that he would want to have anything to do with me. Then again, he had welcomed me back to Garden in a decidedly Un-Squall-like fashion. But to spend his free time letting me beat the shit out of him...and vice versa...some people, including myself, have never understood.
He's changed. He's not so quiet and introverted anymore. That's my job now. I think it has something to do with Rinoa. She's changed him...for the better I guess. He's more open with his feelings...with his opinions...with his friends. I even saw him kissing Rinoa in the hall the other day. Freaky really. Never thought of him like that until I saw it. He's not so cold anymore. Maybe that's why he let me come back. Maybe he felt sorry for me...pitied me. I don't want that, but I think I got it anyway. I'll deal with it. I have to. He'd never come out and say that he felt sorry for me though...he's smarter than that.
Alright. I'll admit it. Squall is...hot. Well, that wasn't as hard as I thought it would be. Then again, I'm not actually saying it out loud to anyone. I'm writing it. But it's true. He is. Especially with that scar I gave him. Makes him look tough...which helps since he looks so much like a girl. He's pretty...not handsome, but he's pretty in a masculine sort of way. I'd never mistake him for a girl...but I'd never fear for my life if I met him for the first time in a dark alley. He seems so fragile...but I know better than that. I used to like him...so much that I dreamt about him. About us. There were so many versions...in the shower...in the training area...in my dorm. The only thing that was the same...was that it was us...and I was in charge. I think back on those dreams now...and they do nothing for me. It used to be that I couldn't do that...I'd get all "hot and bothered". Sometimes I couldn't even look at him. But now...I don't think of him like that anymore...despite the fact he's bloody good looking. I've moved on.
I remember growing up with him now. I picked on him then...and I pick on him now. I used to get him close to tears when he was little...but he never actually cried in front of me. All I ever wanted was for him to talk to me...guess I just went about it in a different way than everyone else. When we got older...the same tactic pissed him off...I thought it was kinda funny. He sort of just ignores it now, or he taunts me back. I don't think I'll ever get used to that.
