RINOA


Annoyingly sweet and caring Rinoa. Not to mention almost completely helpless as well. Maybe I'm the only one who's bothered by her smothering personality. Not that I hate her or anything. I just...can only take so much of her at once. Rinoa in moderation please. I don't know how Squall does it. How does he stay sane? I respect him a little more for that. It takes talent. I couldn't handle it when I dated her. It also didn't help that I wasn't really in to women to begin with...Kudos to you Squall.

But I don't hate her. Why do I feel like I have to keep saying that? Probably because of how I act around her now. She's a sorceress...and that makes me nervous. I know it's stupid...and that it shouldn't bother me, but it does. I know that Ultimecia's gone...that she'll never possess anyone ever again, but I can't get over it. I don't know...and I WON'T ask how Rin feels when shy away from her and go pale. She looks hurt...but I can't help it.

Once, a few weeks after I first came back, she came up behind me and touched my shoulder. When I turned and saw who it was...I almost jumped away from her...like she had the plague or something. I don't know the exact look on my face, but I'm sure it was one close to pure terror. I probably looked so bloody pathetic as I cowered against the wall. She looked about ready to cry...in fact, I think she did. I stayed in my room for three days after that...I needed to get a hold of myself. I knew she was having trouble with what she'd become...I knew the way I'd acted didn't help at all...but I was sure that what she'd gone through was nothing compared to what had happened to me. I still think that's the case...I think I'm the only one.

Maybe I should apologize to her. She didn't deserve all that shit. She didn't deserve to be used by me in my attempt to be "normal". She never asked to become a sorceress. She never wanted any of this...at least I don't think so. I, on the other hand, walked right in, never looked back, took what was offered, and deserved every fucking moment of pain that I got. Yeah...so...I guess...I'll have to tell her I'm sorry...for everything...eventually.