Author's Notes: Yes, this is still part of the Zujo Arc, and hopefully I can finish it here, but if not, then it'll go for another chapter

Author's Notes: Yes, this is still part of the Zujo Arc, and hopefully I can finish it here, but if not, then it'll go for another chapter. One of my best friends really wanted to be in this, so I caved, of course. She isn't an author here at FF.N, but she has considered it. So, um…actually I really don't know why I agreed. Too late now, though. I tried to keep her in character, by the way.

Disclaimer: I don't own Zelda, or Braveheart, or that one line from The Simpsons, or Friday the 13th, FF 7 & 8, OR anything else, and nobody owns my friend because nobody wants her. And, sorry to poke fun at the breakdown, but I couldn't help it. Oh, and I didn't take the idea of MegMar visiting from MD; my friend has wanted to make an appearance for some time now, and I apologize.

Wasting Time W/ Zelda and Company

Part 15:

Zujo, Continued

Hi. Yeah, I'm still here. Stuck in this crummy alternate dimension. At least Chaos promised me I could be guest host sometime. That'll be interesting. 'Course, that's only if she doesn't find some way to get rid of me by then. She never will, though, NEVER, DO YA HEAR ME?! NEVAAAAARRRRRR! Scottish accent Ye ken stick me here, Chaos, but ye ken never take awey me FFRREEDDOOMM! begins dancing a Scottish jig

Chaos: Hey hey HEY! NOBODY WANTS TO SEE THAT!

Ye ken-

Chaos: And cut that out too!

Tch, fine. And what are you doing in the Narrate-a-Verse, anyway?

Chaos: Better. And I'm here because I wanted to see how you're doing.

Doing what?

Chaos: I don't know. It's just something you're supposed to say when you're pretending to be polite.

Oh, ok. Well, things are dull here… but I watch you cough losers cough peoples, so I've got some entertainment, at least. Hey, are you going to make good on that guest-host promise?

Chaos: Of course. I wouldn't miss that for the world. But wait for a bit, ok? I've got a feeling things are going to start blowing up around here soon.

I've noticed.

Link's Room

Link is on the telephone

Link: …uh huh. Yeah, that's all I need. Ring it up, Joe…ok! Just put it on my account. Thanks Joe.

hangs up the telephone

Link: laughing maniacally Hee hee hee ha ha ha HA HA HA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

The Kitchen

Zelda is rummaging through the cupboards

Zelda: humming thriller, thriller night…Where are those blasted M&Ms?!

Elsewhere

Mido is sleeping, still holding a wrench, Phillip's screwdriver, and a bonesaw

Mido: ZZZZZZzzzzzzZZZZZZzzzzz…heh heh heh…laugh at me, will they…? Heh heh heh…ZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzZZZZZZZZZzzzzzz…

Somewhere in the Amazon

Skullkid is sitting on the ground holding his legs to his chest, rocking back and forth

Skullkid: CAN'T SLEEP, CLOWNS WILL EAT ME. CAN'T SLEEP, CLOWNS WILL EAT ME…

Narrate-a-Verse

I have a feeling something is very wrong with those people. And I have a feeling that something is you.

Chaos: Probably. Well, whatever is wrong, it's about to get worse.

Why…?

Chaos: I invited a friend of mine over…

Oh, no…MegMar?

Chaos: Yep.

Now why would you go and do an idiot thing like that?

Chaos: I don't really know.

sighs So when will the shudder Dreaded One be upon us?

Voice: from normal-a-verse, in a random room Hell-ooooooo! Annnnybodyyyyy here? Yo, Chaos! Get your butt out here!

Chaos: looking at Dark Link Um…?

Don't expect me to help you.

Chaos: Drat.

Voice: still in the normal-a-verse I hope you don't mind if I root through your stuff!

She's going to earn that PG-13 rating, isn't she?

Chaos: I'm afraid so. I'd better get down there before she does anything. Oh, and Dark? Keep an eye out, ok? Just in case?

Why should I?

Chaos: 'Cause if you don't, I'll stick her in here with you.

I'll keep an eye out.

In a Random Room

Link: Chaos! There's a crazy lunatic here who say's she's a friend of yours!

Nabooru: Which doesn't surprise me.

Chaos: That would be MegMar.

Ruto: So she is your friend?

Chaos: Yeah…

Impa: Why?

Chaos: No one really knows.

Nabooru: That doesn't surprise me either.

Chaos: Has she caused any damage yet?

Rauru: crying She said I have more rolls than a pastry truck!

Ganon: also crying She said I have green skin!

Chaos: Odd. She usually saves those insults for me. Where is she now?

Link: She's rooting through your stuff.

Chaos: …YOU LET HER IN MY ROOM!?

Link: Y-yes…

Chaos: AIIIIIGGGGHHHH! runs screaming towards her room

Impa: Things are going to get interesting around here, aren't they?

Darunia: Yep.

Chaos's Room

MegMar: going through Chaos's CDs Ooh! I'm gonna borrow this! And this! And this! And I think I'll keep this…

Chaos: Grrr…

Random Room

Chaos and MegMar come out from Chaos's room

Chaos: Everybody, this is MegMar. MegMar, everybody.

Everybody: Hi. Now get out.

MegMar: Hey! Shut up, pointy-eared people!

Ganon: I don't have pointy ears!

MegMar: Shut up, green-skinned person!

Ganon: WAAAAHHHHHHHH! runs away

Suddenly...

Dark Link pushes the "Emergency Fict Stop" button

Just then...

The crew is released from the stop, but MegMar remains frozen, due to some technical babble that we can't explain and you wouldn't believe if we told you

Link: We have an announcement to make!

Chaos: This had better be important. You can't stop a fict just to scratch your arse.

Darunia: Testy, today, aren't we?

Link: Ok, everybody, on three! 1, 2...

Everybody: ***DRAW CHAOSWEAPON CONTEST!***

Chaos: What!?

Link: We got sick of seeing a FF8 character in Chaos's bio. So we decided to get rid of it!
Rauru: holding a burning picture of Rinoa from FF8 Yeah! the fire spreads to his sleeves OW!

Ganon: Of course, while we were removing it, we kinda deleted a line of code from the FF.N database....

Nabooru: The system crashed...

Ruto: Chaos's rabid time-travelling squirrels started rampaging through the site...

Impa: And things went downhill from there.

Saria: But the important part is, we got the picture!

Chaos: Is that what caused the breakdown?

Link: So, now Chaos needs a new pict for her bio.

Ganon: So we decided to use this time to tell you to send in your drawings or picts of what you think ChaosWEAPON looks like!

Nabooru: You can try the human approach, like the Author Formally Known as Misty Dawn did with a drawing of her as an anime character...

Impa: or you can try to draw what a "ChaosWEAPON" would look like.

Saria: Whatever that is...

I did a bit of research on that.

Ganon: What'd ya find?

Well, apparently "Chaos" is a big bat-winged demon type thing that a "Limit Break" of some FF7 guy, Vincent Valentine. It was also the final boss from FF1.

Link: Limit Break?

Nabooru: And...?

"WEAPONS" are big-arse monsters from various FF games.

Impa: You love FF more that us, don't you!?

Chaos: No.

Impa: Oh, ok.

Link: So, um, try to draw ChaosWEAPON, however you want. E-Mail 'em to us at her address...

Ganon: holding sign that says "Criosphinx@ffgurus.zzn.com"

Impa: And assuming she can figure out the attachment system...

Link: We'll force her to post the winner on her profile!

Heh heh heh. I think I'll ask MegMar if she still has a copy of the Forbidden Photograph.

Chaos: gasp! You wouldn't dare!

Ganon: Forbidden Photo...?

There's this one picture from a fieldtrip in 5th grade, and Chaos took one of those gummi Lifesavers, and-

Chaos: SILENCE! (A/N: There is such a Forbidden Photograph, and, yes, MegMar still has a copy.)

Link: Press the Resume Fict Button, Dark.

Ok. fict resumes

MegMar: So, wazzzzuuuup?!

Chaos: Nothing. Give me back my CDs.

MegMar: No! I wanna…borrow…them. Please? Bambi eyes

Chaos: No. Give them back.

MegMar: Awwwwww…no.

Chaos: Grrrrr…

30 minutes later…

Chaos: putting her CDs back Whew!

Ganon: Ooh! Battlebots is on! Let's watch it!

Rauru: No, let's watch Cooking With Dave!

Ganon: Battlebots!

Rauru: Cooking With Dave!

Chaos: grabbing remote Whose Line, and I call it! So nyeh!

Everyone: Awwww.

apart from Chaos's laughter, things are quiet

CRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

Link: holding his head AAAAAUUUUUUUUGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!

MegMar: holding her still-vibrating cymbals Wasn't me. eyes shift from side to side

Zelda: entering, with M&Ms between her teeth and singing It wasn't me! But she caught me on the counter! Wasn't me! Saw me kissing…

MegMar: Yeah, ah uh, you're done.

Zelda: Done? Rrraaaagggghhhhhhhh snarl Roar! foaming at the mouth

Everyone: Woah!

MegMar: AAHHH! smacks Zelda with cymbals

Zelda: This one time, at band camp…passes out

Chaos: Wow. MegMar did something good for once!

MegMar: Oh yeah! I rule! starts singing Mmm bop! Da da dee mm bop!

Zelda: wakes up AHHHH! No! NO MMM BOP! Grrrahhhh snarl! attacks MegMar

Chaos: gasp! Zelda killed MegMar!

Everyone: ……WHOOO-HOOO!

Chaos: As a reward for ridding us of her, narrating And so, Zelda was cured of her rabies…

Zelda: Huh? What-? Hey, M&Ms!

Ruto: Drat. Well, I'm gonna go get some chips…Aaaaiiiiiieeeeee!

there is someone with a chainsaw and a Jason-esque hockey mask behind her

Person in Jason Mask: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Chaos: grabbing a pitchfork Die, spawn of cheeze wiz!

MegMar: pulling off mask Simmer down, there!

Everyone: AAAAAAAHHHHH! MEGMAR'S A ZOMBIE!!!!

Chaos: Even worse. Get out of here! narrating MegMar was transported who knows where…

MegMar: I'LL BE BAAAAaaaaaaack!

Everyone: Whew…

Nabooru: Well, this chapter was certainly pointless.

Impa: Right. Let's end it now, before it gets to someone else.

Chaos: Sounds good. Bybyies!