Author's Notes: Hey, people of FF

Author's Notes: Hey, people of FF.N! I'm sure you've been wondering what the heck is wrong with the characters. Mido I'll let you figure out, Skullkid should re-enter soon, around chapter 19 (Yes, I have a 20 chapter plan for this.). Link, however, gets his problem cleared up now. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: Ok, Don't Own Zelda. Now that that's cleared up, let me say this, in regards to this chapter's contents: Never Do This! Well, I suppose you can, but don't come blame me when you get in trouble for it.

Side Notes: Nobody's sent me any submission for the drawing contest! Or for Dark's chap! Now I'm sad…the drawing thing has plenty of time, but Dark gets to host soon, so if you want to make a cameo, please let me know now. Otherwise, I'll just have to drag in some authors against their will. And nobody wants that to happen. Without further ado…

Chapter 17: Prank War Vengeance!

Hey, all. Dark here, live from the Narrate-a-Verse. In case you didn't read that 50th Review thing Chaos posted, here's a recap of what it changed, which is only one thing. Apparently, Chaos had a Library, Pool, Game Room, and a ton of other cool stuff stuck up here in the Narrate-a-Verse without me knowing. So don't be all like "Where the heck did that come from?" if she decides to pay a visit there.

Someone From Normal-a-Verse: Muweheheheheheheheheheh……

Oh, right. Linky-boy's been up to something, so I'm going to stay up here where it's safe and let Chaos deal with the little buggers.

Chaos: Hey!

Chaos! Where were you?

Chaos: The Archives.

Archives…?

Chaos: It's where I keep my fict ideas.

Hmmmmm…

Chaos: Off limits.

Drat.

Chaos: So, what are the "little buggers" doing, and why do I have to deal with it?

I don't know. You remember Link declared war on Ganon and vice-versa?

Chaos: Yeah. They went on a rampage and broke a lot of stuff. If it weren't for the Magical Cleaning Elves of Hyrule Castle I'd still be picking things up!

Um…ok…well, I think Kilt-man is up to something.

Chaos: How can you tell?

Link: from Normal-a-Verse Muweheheheheheheheheheh……

Chaos: Oh. Guess I should get down there, huh?

Normal-a-Verse

Link: Muweheheheheheheheheheh……

Chaos: Ok, Link. What are you plotting now?

Link: I'm not plotting anything.

Ganon: from bathroom AAAAAUUUUUUUGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!

Link: I already did it.

Chaos: Oh no.

Ganon: RRRRAAAAAGGHHHHH!!!

Chaos: Hello.

Ganon: GGGGGRRRRRRR!!

Chaos: Ok, what did he do?

Ganon: He cyran-wrapped the toilet!

Chaos: He what?!

Link: Geheheheheheheheheheheheh! Waaah! runs away, Ganon chasing him

Chaos: Oh, this is going to be an interesting day…

We regret to inform you that due to a rather unfortunate freak accident involving a game of Monopoly, 32 quarts of applesauce, a set of venetian blinds, 3 cats, and a glass of milk, the rest of this chapter was lost. Fortunately, we have NaviCam™ to fall back on. Even though she's still a little whacked out from the rabies incident, we bribed her enough- er, I mean, she was gracious enough to follow Link and Ganon around with a camera. So, without further ado, here's what she caught.

Prank 2: Body Art

Link is asleep on the couch. Ganon approaches with a bag of…things…

Ganon: Heh heh heh…

Link: ZZZZZzzzzzzZZZZZZzzzzzz…hmmm…ZZZZZZzzzzzzzzZZZZZZ…

Ganon: Here's something to go with those earrings, Linky-boy. takes out a black permanent marker

marker-type squeaking sounds are heard

Ganon: Hehehehehehehehehehehehehehehe!

Link: Mmmmmpphhh…?

Ganon: Heh heh heh… tiptoes out

Link: Yaaaaawwwwnnnn….hmmmm…nice nap.

Zelda: walking in Good morn…ing…(mmmphh) hehehehehehehehehehe!

Link: Huh? What's so funny?

Zelda: Nooooooooothhhhhhingggggggg….gigglegigglesnort

Link: Uh, ok. I'll just…go over…here…now…slowly walks out

5 mins later, in Link's bedroom…

Link: looking into the mirror at his new "tattoos," which are in the designs of all the "My Little Pony" characters, the "Care Bears," and "Teletubbies" AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH

Prank 3: Shower

Link, still covered in the drawings (it was a permanent marker) is in Ganon's bathroom

Link: taking out a jar of petroleum jelly Good luck trying to get clean, Ganny, or should I say…break a leg? Muhahahahahahahaha! coats the shower floor with the slickiness

Link: And here he comes! Oh no, I'm trapped! dives down the laundry chute

Ganon: humming the tune to "My Little Pony" Time for a hot shower…

turns on the shower, and steps in. Immediately slips.

Ganon: Voop! thud!

Prank 4: New Car

Ganon, arm in a splint, is on the phone

Ganon: Yes, two tons of it…yes, that's where I want it. Thanks! hangs up

Meanwhile…

Link: with various car-washing materials Time to give my new car a good scrubbing! sings Scrubbing, scrubbing, scrubbing…

Outside…

a cement truck, loaded with two tons of wet cement, looms over Link's new Porsche…

Link: stepping outside, soap bucket in hand What the…?

the cement truck lines up. Ready…aim…

Link: in slow-motion NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!

Due to Link's particularly violent reaction to having his new car plastered, the rest of this prank scene had to be edited out. While we're waiting, let's check up on some of the other members of this fict…

Chaos

In the Archives, working on her script, story ideas, etc.

Chaos: Hmmm…who can I con into being a guest on D's chapter…? MusicMonkey might come…of course, that in itself is inviting disaster…but then again…

Zelda

working out to MJ's music videos while eating M&M's. She does that a lot lately…

Zelda: And one…two…Thriller…four…Switch! One…two…Thriller…four…

Rauru

At an Overeater's Anonymous help group

Rauru: Hi, everyone. My name is Rauru, and I haven't been to Taco Bell for five whole minutes!

cheers

Darunia

at the same OA meeting

Darunia: Yea Rauru! Whoooo!

Saria, Impa, and Nabooru

in Impa's room, and both Saria and Impa are dressed in black

Impa: trying to sound like Yoda Well, young one, far you have come in your training. Hmm, yes.

Saria: Master Impa, why do you speak in such riddles?

Nabooru: trying not to laugh Mmmpphh…hehehehehehehe…

Ruto

on a date with TK (see 50th Review Extravaganza)

Ruto: sigh TK…

TK: still with burn marks on his arm Ruto…

Ruto: I still can't believe you hit me with a Pokeball…

Malon

missing, presumed drunk

Mido

missing, presumed insane

Skullkid

On a stage somewhere in Russia, doing that strange Russian dance (you know the one)

Skullkid: DA DA DA DA DA DA, DA DA DA DA DA DA HEY!

And, now, back to the point…

Prank 5: Air Horns

Link, looking quite ticked off, has ear plug jammed in his elfish ears and two large air horns, is sneaking up behind Ganon, who is reading the Funnies

Ganon: Hahahahaha! Oh, that Marmaduke! Such a zainy dog.

Link: Oh, Ganon…?

Ganon: Huh?

Link: pulling triggers Listen. BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEPPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ganon: now quite deaf AAAAARRRRRRGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!

Prank 6: Laundry

Impa is doing some laundry, and Ganon walks up to her

Ganon: yelling, 'cause he's still deaf HEY IMPA!!

Impa: AAHHH! Ganon, you don't have to yell!

Ganon: WHAT?!

Impa: DON'T YELL!!

Ganon: I'M NOT YELLING!!

Impa: Whatever…WHAT DO YOU WANT?!

Ganon: MIND IF I HELP WITH THE LAUNDRY?!

Impa: SURE. I'M GOING TO GET A DRINK, SO TAKE OVER FOR ME!

Ganon: OK!!

Impa: Weird guy. leaves

Ganon: thinking Heh! Perfect! Let's see how much Link loves his tunic when I add this to the wash! puts Link's clothes into the washing machine, and takes out a bag

HEH HEH HEH!! takes out a bottle of Itching Powder, Liquid Heat, and some Poison Oak Extract. Naturally, he pours them into the washing machine HEH HEH HEH…!!

later…

Link: now in the washing room, pulling his clothes from the dryer Ah! Freshly dried clothes! puts them on Mmm! Nice! Now to go get a drink…

in the kitchen…

Impa is getting another cola, and Link comes in

Impa: Hi, Link. Want a cola?

Link: …sure…that…would…be…ni-iiiiiicccceeee! AAAAHHHHH!! begins itching uncontrollably AAAAHAHHHHH!!

Impa: …weird guy.

Nabooru comes in, and stares at Link

Nabooru: O.o

Link: now rolling on floor, itching and scratching AAAAAAHHHHHGGGGGG!!

Nabooru: Ok…strange.

Impa: Tell me about it.

Link: RRRRGGGGG…strips down to his underwear, the only thing Ganon refused to touch Ah! Free at last! runs outside, doing cartwheels and flips Wheeeee!

Nabooru + Impa: …weird guy.

Normal-a-Verse

Chaos: listening to Ganon yell and watching Link dance and frolic about Ok, that does it! narrating The offending pranksters were placed in separate cages…

Ganon: appearing in cage WHAT THE-?!

Link: appearing in another cage Wheeee- huh?

Chaos: As fun as it is to watch you two, I've had enough. You two will stay in those cages until I find a suitable punishment.

Ganon: WHAT?!

Chaos: … smacks him upside the head, her hand making a ringing sound on his metal plates

Ganon: Ouch! Hey, I can hear again!

Link: Hey…can I at least have a fresh pair of clothes?

Chaos: No.

Ganon: You're not…gonna let the readers decide our fate, are ya?

Chaos: Of course I am.

Saria: Hehehehe! That'll be fun!

Link + Ganon: Traitor…

Chaos: And now the ending…ahem Dark gets to host next chapter, and I'm going to humiliate these two then, so if you have a suggestion, please send it in ASAP to: Criosphinx@ffgurus.zzn.com ok? Oh, yeah, and MusicMonkey see above is MegMar's new nickname, by the way. Thankies, and Bybyies!