I own nothing, nowhere, and nobody. Except Lizzie. Everything I don't own belongs to JK Rowling.
"Chocolate Frogs! Every Flavor Beans! Pumpkin Pasties! Canary Cremes!" called the
sweet-selling witch.
Cheers erupted from an adjacent compartment. Fred, George, Lee Jordan, Katie Bell,
Angelina Johnson, and Alicia Spinnet were celebrating the retail debut of Gred and
Forge's Canary Cremes.
Harry waved down the sweet-selling witch. "I'd like four Chocolate Frogs, four packages
of Every Flavor Beans, and four Pumpkin Pasties, please," Harry requested, then, almost
as an afterthought, he added, "And one Canary Creme." Harry handed the witch two
Golden Galleons. The witch giggled and blushed, at which Harry mentally rolled his eyes.
"Right nice of you to buy sweets for all of us," Ron remarked, biting into his Pumpkin
Pasty.
"I suppose," Harry replied absently. "Did you see the way she giggled at me? Goodness,
being a celebrity is dull. I just wish people would treat me like they treat everyone else,"
Harry lamented as he popped a Chocolate Frog into his mouth. "Here, Ron, I've got
Agrippa. You can have her. I've already got one."
"Thanks, Harry! I've been looking for Agrippa forever." Ron looked down at Agrippa,
who was currently brushing her teeth. "Anyway, here come two people who sure do treat
you like a normal person," Ron commented, "Here come Hermione and Lizzie. The two
most insufferable know-it-alls in the world."
Hermione and a slightly downtrodden-looking Lizzie entered the compartment. Hermione
shot a glare at Harry and Ron before sitting down.
"Here, have a Chocolate Frog," Harry offered to Lizzie, trying to make amends.
Lizzie refused the well-meant treat coldly, saying, "I'm allergic to chocolate, thank you."
Then she crossed her arms.
Harry then gave both remaining Chocolate Frogs to Hermione, who looked at him as if to
say, "Try again, Harry."
So Harry offered her a Pumpkin Pasty and some Every Flavor Beans, both of which Lizzie
refused with scathingly icy courtesy.
"I suppose you wouldn't want this then, either?" Harry queried, holding out the Canary
Creme. Ron and Hermione's eyes became as large as saucers, wondering what Harry
would do.
"That's correct," Lizzie replied. Her voice was like the iceberg that sunk the Titanic.
"Oh, well," Harry said nonchalantly, "More for me." Then Harry popped the Canary
Creme into his mouth and promptly transformed into a yellow songbird.
"I can't believe he did that!" Ron exclaimed, picking up the chirping Harry, "He knew that
was a Canary Creme, too. Wonder why he did it?"
Lizzie, meanwhile, burst into screams of delight. "How hilarious! What kind of sweet is
that, anyway?"
"It's a Canary Creme," Hermione replied matter-of-factly. "Ron's brothers, Fred and
George make them, don't they, Ron?"
"That's right, Hermione. Lizzie, I reckon that Harry did that to mend things up. He really
was sorry about hurting your feelings."
At this point, Harry was flying around their compartment, whistling madly. Fred exited his
compartment and said, "Our first commercial victim! Who is it, Ron?" Fred asked with
excitement.
"It's Harry," Ron responded, "And he did it because Lizzie here was mad at him. Not so
furious anymore, are you, Lizzie?"
Lizzie stifled a laugh, then answered coldly, "Oh, yes I am. Self-degradation never makes
me feel sorry for anyone."
Hermione rolled her eyes. "Harry isn't trying to make you feel sorry for him, Lizzie! He
just wants you to laugh! Honestly, Harry Potter doesn't make a fool of himself unless he
feels he has something to prove. So just cool off... Or should I say warm up, Lizzie?"
By the time the bright red train reached Hogwarts, Harry had turned back into his normal
self again and Parvati and Lavender were fawning all over him.
"Oh, he just cheered that new Irish girl right up! Harry is so kind and sensitive and
compassionate, he could charm his worst enemy into saving his life!" Parvati gushed.
Harry did not bother to set Parvati wrong, but it was a proven fact that Draco Malfoy,
Harry's worst enemy, would like nothing more than to see him die. In fact, he had
demonstrated this desire on quite a few occasions. But of course, Parvati and Lavender
never listened to reason, they only listened to Rita Skeeter's gossip in Witch Weekly.
Once safely inside Hogwarts, Ron sidled up behind Lizzie. "BOO!" He yelled, and of
course Lizzie ran screaming down the hall. Ron then commented to Harry, "Geez. She is
such a little scaredy-puss. I bet she'd die if there was a spider on her shoulder."
Harry retorted, "I bet YOU'D die if there was a spider on YOUR shoulder, Ron. You've
been scared of those things forever."
Ron's ears turned a peculiar shade of red, then he changed the subject. "Anyway, she's
such a scaredy-puss, I'm certain that she'll never make it into Gryffindor. With any luck,
she'll get into Ravenclaw, and we won't have any classes with her at all!" It was common
knowledge that Gryffindors never had classes with Ravenclaws, and indeed the only time
the two houses ever mingled was at Quidditch games.
"Yeah," Harry replied, "But the only people I wish were in Ravenclaw are Lavender and
Parvati. I can't stand them much longer! Always giggling and blushing and falling all over
me. It's getting to the point where I can't stand it much longer!"
Ron shrugged, then muttered, "I sure wouldn't mind if Lavender were giggling and
blushing and falling all over ME."
Harry looked at Ron in surprise, saying, "You fancy Lavender Brown? The color girl?
Well, I wish you the best of luck. If only you can get her off of me, I'll be happy. I'm sick
of her."
Just then, Hermione came between Ron and Harry, looking them in the face severely.
"Ron, if you ever make fun of Lizzie again, I won't help you study for any of your tests all
this year. And Harry, encouraging him! I'm ashamed of you. That girl's been through a
whole lot more than you'll ever know. I don't care if you dislike her, but please refrain
from making fun of her in public!"
Ron's entire face turned red, and his temper reared. "Just where do you get off telling me
what to do, Hermione Granger? You're always sticking up for the little people, for Neville
Longbottom and the house elves, and now for some Catholic ice queen! If I didn't know
any better, I'd say you have a superiority complex-- Oh wait, you do! I'm going to be
sick!" Ron stormed away to the nearest bathroom.
Hermione was left in tears. "I don't have an superiority complex. I stick up for people
because I'm nice. And I'm not really that bossy, am I, Harry?" Hermione looked up at
Harry, her face covered with streams of saline.
Harry bit his lip. He knew the truth. Hermione was a bit bossy, sometimes to the point of
insufferability. But she certainly didn't deserve what Ron had done to her just now, and
Harry told her so. "Hermione, nobody deserves the kind of chewing out Ron just gave
you. But you know how his temper is. Don't go running to the bathroom, we wouldn't
want to fight another troll."
Hermione smiled at this reference to their first-year escapades. She fully expected to read
about some of the trio's daring feats in the next edition of Hogwarts, a History. "Come
on, Harry. Let's get seated. I want to see Lizzie get sorted. I do hope she makes it into
Gryffindor, Lavender and Parvati do get so tiring after a while. All they ever talk about is
you. No offence, but there are other things I prefer to spend my time discussing."
As Harry and Hermione sat down, Harry said, "That's quite all right. I get pretty tired of
people talking about me all the time. It was bad when I was just a celebrity, but now girls
view me as some sort of god. Sometimes I wish I was just normal, like you."
"Chocolate Frogs! Every Flavor Beans! Pumpkin Pasties! Canary Cremes!" called the
sweet-selling witch.
Cheers erupted from an adjacent compartment. Fred, George, Lee Jordan, Katie Bell,
Angelina Johnson, and Alicia Spinnet were celebrating the retail debut of Gred and
Forge's Canary Cremes.
Harry waved down the sweet-selling witch. "I'd like four Chocolate Frogs, four packages
of Every Flavor Beans, and four Pumpkin Pasties, please," Harry requested, then, almost
as an afterthought, he added, "And one Canary Creme." Harry handed the witch two
Golden Galleons. The witch giggled and blushed, at which Harry mentally rolled his eyes.
"Right nice of you to buy sweets for all of us," Ron remarked, biting into his Pumpkin
Pasty.
"I suppose," Harry replied absently. "Did you see the way she giggled at me? Goodness,
being a celebrity is dull. I just wish people would treat me like they treat everyone else,"
Harry lamented as he popped a Chocolate Frog into his mouth. "Here, Ron, I've got
Agrippa. You can have her. I've already got one."
"Thanks, Harry! I've been looking for Agrippa forever." Ron looked down at Agrippa,
who was currently brushing her teeth. "Anyway, here come two people who sure do treat
you like a normal person," Ron commented, "Here come Hermione and Lizzie. The two
most insufferable know-it-alls in the world."
Hermione and a slightly downtrodden-looking Lizzie entered the compartment. Hermione
shot a glare at Harry and Ron before sitting down.
"Here, have a Chocolate Frog," Harry offered to Lizzie, trying to make amends.
Lizzie refused the well-meant treat coldly, saying, "I'm allergic to chocolate, thank you."
Then she crossed her arms.
Harry then gave both remaining Chocolate Frogs to Hermione, who looked at him as if to
say, "Try again, Harry."
So Harry offered her a Pumpkin Pasty and some Every Flavor Beans, both of which Lizzie
refused with scathingly icy courtesy.
"I suppose you wouldn't want this then, either?" Harry queried, holding out the Canary
Creme. Ron and Hermione's eyes became as large as saucers, wondering what Harry
would do.
"That's correct," Lizzie replied. Her voice was like the iceberg that sunk the Titanic.
"Oh, well," Harry said nonchalantly, "More for me." Then Harry popped the Canary
Creme into his mouth and promptly transformed into a yellow songbird.
"I can't believe he did that!" Ron exclaimed, picking up the chirping Harry, "He knew that
was a Canary Creme, too. Wonder why he did it?"
Lizzie, meanwhile, burst into screams of delight. "How hilarious! What kind of sweet is
that, anyway?"
"It's a Canary Creme," Hermione replied matter-of-factly. "Ron's brothers, Fred and
George make them, don't they, Ron?"
"That's right, Hermione. Lizzie, I reckon that Harry did that to mend things up. He really
was sorry about hurting your feelings."
At this point, Harry was flying around their compartment, whistling madly. Fred exited his
compartment and said, "Our first commercial victim! Who is it, Ron?" Fred asked with
excitement.
"It's Harry," Ron responded, "And he did it because Lizzie here was mad at him. Not so
furious anymore, are you, Lizzie?"
Lizzie stifled a laugh, then answered coldly, "Oh, yes I am. Self-degradation never makes
me feel sorry for anyone."
Hermione rolled her eyes. "Harry isn't trying to make you feel sorry for him, Lizzie! He
just wants you to laugh! Honestly, Harry Potter doesn't make a fool of himself unless he
feels he has something to prove. So just cool off... Or should I say warm up, Lizzie?"
By the time the bright red train reached Hogwarts, Harry had turned back into his normal
self again and Parvati and Lavender were fawning all over him.
"Oh, he just cheered that new Irish girl right up! Harry is so kind and sensitive and
compassionate, he could charm his worst enemy into saving his life!" Parvati gushed.
Harry did not bother to set Parvati wrong, but it was a proven fact that Draco Malfoy,
Harry's worst enemy, would like nothing more than to see him die. In fact, he had
demonstrated this desire on quite a few occasions. But of course, Parvati and Lavender
never listened to reason, they only listened to Rita Skeeter's gossip in Witch Weekly.
Once safely inside Hogwarts, Ron sidled up behind Lizzie. "BOO!" He yelled, and of
course Lizzie ran screaming down the hall. Ron then commented to Harry, "Geez. She is
such a little scaredy-puss. I bet she'd die if there was a spider on her shoulder."
Harry retorted, "I bet YOU'D die if there was a spider on YOUR shoulder, Ron. You've
been scared of those things forever."
Ron's ears turned a peculiar shade of red, then he changed the subject. "Anyway, she's
such a scaredy-puss, I'm certain that she'll never make it into Gryffindor. With any luck,
she'll get into Ravenclaw, and we won't have any classes with her at all!" It was common
knowledge that Gryffindors never had classes with Ravenclaws, and indeed the only time
the two houses ever mingled was at Quidditch games.
"Yeah," Harry replied, "But the only people I wish were in Ravenclaw are Lavender and
Parvati. I can't stand them much longer! Always giggling and blushing and falling all over
me. It's getting to the point where I can't stand it much longer!"
Ron shrugged, then muttered, "I sure wouldn't mind if Lavender were giggling and
blushing and falling all over ME."
Harry looked at Ron in surprise, saying, "You fancy Lavender Brown? The color girl?
Well, I wish you the best of luck. If only you can get her off of me, I'll be happy. I'm sick
of her."
Just then, Hermione came between Ron and Harry, looking them in the face severely.
"Ron, if you ever make fun of Lizzie again, I won't help you study for any of your tests all
this year. And Harry, encouraging him! I'm ashamed of you. That girl's been through a
whole lot more than you'll ever know. I don't care if you dislike her, but please refrain
from making fun of her in public!"
Ron's entire face turned red, and his temper reared. "Just where do you get off telling me
what to do, Hermione Granger? You're always sticking up for the little people, for Neville
Longbottom and the house elves, and now for some Catholic ice queen! If I didn't know
any better, I'd say you have a superiority complex-- Oh wait, you do! I'm going to be
sick!" Ron stormed away to the nearest bathroom.
Hermione was left in tears. "I don't have an superiority complex. I stick up for people
because I'm nice. And I'm not really that bossy, am I, Harry?" Hermione looked up at
Harry, her face covered with streams of saline.
Harry bit his lip. He knew the truth. Hermione was a bit bossy, sometimes to the point of
insufferability. But she certainly didn't deserve what Ron had done to her just now, and
Harry told her so. "Hermione, nobody deserves the kind of chewing out Ron just gave
you. But you know how his temper is. Don't go running to the bathroom, we wouldn't
want to fight another troll."
Hermione smiled at this reference to their first-year escapades. She fully expected to read
about some of the trio's daring feats in the next edition of Hogwarts, a History. "Come
on, Harry. Let's get seated. I want to see Lizzie get sorted. I do hope she makes it into
Gryffindor, Lavender and Parvati do get so tiring after a while. All they ever talk about is
you. No offence, but there are other things I prefer to spend my time discussing."
As Harry and Hermione sat down, Harry said, "That's quite all right. I get pretty tired of
people talking about me all the time. It was bad when I was just a celebrity, but now girls
view me as some sort of god. Sometimes I wish I was just normal, like you."
