FOREVER KNIGHT
Four Letter Word
The wind howled against the closed windows. He looked at his watch; eight o'clock and still not a word. For the hundredth time he stood up and paced. Back and forth and back and forth. He leaned against the mantle. Somewhere off in the distance he could hear a siren.
She wasn't going to call. But then, why would she?
It wasn't as if they were together; it wasn't as if they ever could be. She was far better off without him; if he knew nothing after 800 years, he knew that.
Nick sighed as he listened to the wind blow. It was a hollow sound, almost as hollow as his heart felt. He looked at the phone. It wasn't going to ring. He walked toward the lift door, grabbed his coat and stepped into the elevator. He could either sit and stare at the phone, feeling sorry for himself, or he could go see what Janette was doing. He opted for the latter.
Janette was sitting at the bar, sipping bloodwine, when Nick entered the Raven. The club was quite busy; no surprise there given the night. Nick made his way through the crowd, and a smile began to appear on his face. A much better choice, coming out and being around his own kind. The smile disappeared quickly as he neared Janette, and noticed the handsome man sitting next to her at the bar. It was very clear from their body language that they were not strangers. Nick bristled slightly as the man touched Janette's hand with his.
For a moment he just stood there and stared at the two of them. He had no idea that Janette was seeing someone. He felt odd. At least odd was the only word which he could find that sort of fit what he was feeling. He started when the velvety voice spoke into his ear, the cool breath tickling his lobe.
Surprised to discover that she doesn't just sit around waiting for you?
Nick turned to glare at LaCroix, I have never expected her to....
who is he?
A new one in town. Not that old.
Nick glared in the direction of the man in question, Does she...
His voice trailed off, so LaCroix finished the thought, Love him? Nick looked at his father, his eyes narrowing, LaCroix continued, I really don't know. You'd have to ask her.
Nick stared at LaCroix for a moment; his father was certainly taking it all with a bored countenance, but was that the truth? Nick tried to hone in on their link, only to discover that LaCroix had slammed it shut. LaCroix glared at Nick.
Don't try to insinuate yourself into my thoughts, Nicholas. You'll not find any answers there anyway.
LaCroix stalked off, toward the back hallway and the relative serenity of his broadcasting booth. Nick followed him. He watched LaCroix go into the booth, and almost had the door slammed in his face. Nick caught the door, the two men glared at each other, then Nick stepped into the room, closing the door behind him. LaCroix just looked at his son and sighed.
Really Nicholas, when will you learn that you cannot have your cake and eat it too?
I don't expect that--
--the hell you don't, mon fils.
Nick glared at his father, What do you mean?
LaCroix crossed his arms in front of him, Where is the good doctor this evening, hmmm?
Nick looked away.
That's what I thought, LaCroix said, smiling.
Nick glared sharply, You don't know what you're talking about.
Dr. Lambert has apparently found something else to do this lovely Valentine's night, and so you decided that spending time with Janette was better than sitting at home alone. Isn't that right, Nicholas?
Again Nick looked away. LaCroix moved closer, leaning in as he spoke.
How would you like to always be treated as a second fiddle, Nicholas?
I do not treat Janette that way.
Oh, don't you? LaCroix paused for a moment, then continued, Can you honestly stand there and tell me that you'd be here, amongst your own kind, if your mortal pet had made herself available?
She's not a pet--
--Fine, fine. Don't argue semantics with me. You can't win. Nick glared, LaCroix acquiesced, slightly, Fine. She's not a pet. That still doesn't change the fact that you came her to seek out Janette's company after the fact, now, does it? That's hardly the appropriate way to treat a woman you once professed to love.
Oh what would you know about love? You've never truly loved a damned thing in your life, LaCroix--
No sooner were the words out of his mouth, Nick felt guilty. He slammed his eyes shut. After a moment, he opened them slowly. LaCroix was standing on the other side of the room, his back to his son. Nick walked toward him, but kept some distance.
I'm sorry, LaCroix. I didn't mean that, I know it isn't true.
LaCroix turned, his face the perfect picture of calm, a sardonic smile on his lips, But you're quite right, Nicholas. Love is a four letter word invented by mortals, and it has nothing to do with our kind.
Nick's cell phone rang, interrupting the moment.
The voice on the other end of the phone was soft, I'm sorry I'm late in calling. I was hung up at work.
Where are you now?
Just got home.
Can I take you to dinner?
There was a slight hesitation, but then, Sure, why not. Just give me a half hour.
Okay, I'll see you then, Nat.
Nick closed his cell phone and put it in his pocket. LaCroix had an amused look on his face.
So your pet called. How nice for you.
Nick let it lie; he knew that LaCroix' anger was coming from deep inside him. After a few minutes, Nick took a step closer, his voice as soft as a caress.
Will you be all right, LaCroix?
The ancient one stared at his son for a moment, as if the question had no relevance, Of course.
There was nothing more Nick could do, and he knew it. Silently he turned and walked out the door, gently closing it behind him. LaCroix remained tense for several minutes after Nick retreated, until he was sure that his son was too far away to sense much from him. He collapsed in the nearest chair, exhausted from keeping the barriers up. He hadn't really fooled Nicholas in any case, and he knew it. He leaned his hand heavily into his hand.
The door to the soundbooth carefully opened, and closed after she entered the room. He had forgotten that she would sense it. He heaved a burdened sigh, but he neither moved nor tried to cover up the emotions swirling inside him. He felt the gentle hand tentatively reach for his shoulder, and still he did not move, nor acknowledge her presence.
Her voice was soft, caring, Mon pere....let me help you.
He looked away, There is nothing you can do.
I can listen, or I can just sit here with you. It isn't much, but it's something.
I do not need a babysitter, Janette.
She sat in the chair next to him, pulling his hand into both of hers, I know that, LaCroix. But I can feel your--
He stood up abruptly casting her hands away, moving toward the other side of the room, --Damnit! I do not need your concern, nor your pity. Besides, you should attend to your adoring public before he wanders off in search of greener pastures.
The barb rammed home, and Janette looked down, Very well.
She headed quickly toward the door, when his voice stopped her; not from the volume, but from the intensity,
She stopped and turned to look at him, but he was still facing away from her, still on the other side of the room. She closed her eyes, pulling in the emotions she sensed. He did not want to be alone. He wanted her to stay. He couldn't bring himself to voice it. Janette shook her head sadly; he was incapable of being demonstrative. It had always been one of his greatest faults.
The thought made her smile; perhaps it wasn't a fault at all. Perhaps it was a protection not only for him, but for all of those around him. She moved slowly toward him, and he did not move away. Once again, she gently reached for his hand, taking it into hers, caressing it slightly as she held it.
He said nothing, but she could feel his heart begin to calm.
After a long time, she quietly spoke, LaCroix.....she knew. He looked at her sharply, but said nothing, and Janette continued, She knew you loved her.
His eyes shined with unshed tears of pain and regret. He made no move toward her, nor did he move away. He simply allowed her to hold his hand, softly caressing the top of it. If it was all she could do for him, it would be enough.
It would have to be.
The end.
