Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Alan trudged home, mind in turmoil. He hade told Gerry that he loved J. This was the first time that he had said this thought, either aloud to himself. Now he was analyzing this feeling, checking to see if it was real. Did he love her? As his best friend, there was no doubt. But the other way…?

He had known her all his life. J was the one person that could make him laugh to matter what was going on—not even Gerry could do that. Just the thought of J—her brightness, openness, zest for life—lifted his spirits. He wanted to tell her more than anything what was going on with his father, but that would worry her. The one thing that Alan refused to do was let anything hurt J. He knew well that she could take full care of herself, but Alan didn't want to let her know anything that might cause her pain. And Alan was sure that if J knew that he was being beaten by his father, she would be very upset.

Then there was this other feeling, the one that he couldn't quite place. It was one that hadn't always been there; Alan had first been aware of its presence a couple months ago. But now he realized that it had been creeping upon him for about a year now. So did all of this mean that he loved J?

Alan reached his house and stared at the doorknob, wanting to delay the inevitable for just a few more moments. What did it matter, she didn't love him, not that way anyway. It was Sunshine that she was interested in. Taking a deep breath, Alan walked up to his house and went inside.

***

About a week or so later, J was heading home from a piano lesson. Her mind was not on Bach, however. It was on Alan. He'd been much more quiet than usual lately, and he'd also come to school with assortments of bruises and cuts. J knew that something was going on, and she wasn't the only one. She had gone to Coach (Yoast) and he shared her concerns. But he said that there wasn't much that they could do if Alan wouldn't say anything.

J paused in her brisk walk. Something was wrong. Very wrong. J took off in a dead sprint for Alan's house. Since she was close, it didn't take her long to reach it. She dashed up and pounded on the door, but there was no answer. J hurled the door open (thankfully it was unlocked) and raced up to Alan's room. The next few minutes were a surreal blur.

There stood Fred Bosley, standing frozen in the center of the room, staring at Coaches Boone and Yoast. Boone was on his way out of the room (to call an ambulance), and he tried to tell J something, but she didn't hear. All she could focus on was Alan. He lay on the floor, battered and unmoving except for the slight rise and fall of his chest. Yoast was beside him, checking Alan over for all his injuries.

"Now, J, try to stay calm. Coach Boone and I are handling things—" But J would have none of it. She heard herself scream

"Alan!" before flinging herself next to him and sobbing. Boone and Yoast took care of the rest.

***

Alan searched the crowd around his hospital bed, but didn't see J. 'She must be mad at me for not telling her,' he thought with a heavy heart. He talked to everyone for awhile, but soon they had to leave. It was just him and Coach (Yoast) in the room. When Coach told Alan about his mother, Alan was too shocked and tired to reply very much. Coach glanced at his watch,

"I should be going," Alan nodded,

"Alright." Coach turned to go, but right before leaving, turned back.

"J has been by your side ever since she found you. The paramedics practically
had to pry her away from your stretcher so they could put you in the ambulance. They wouldn't let her ride with you. It made her very upset. She has been beating down doctors for updates every few hours." Finished, Coach left, and Alan turned his head to see her. She was half sitting in a chair next to him, half lying on the bed beside him, fast asleep. When Alan twisted his body, wincing in pain, to get a better look at her, she stirred and woke. Upon seeing Alan awake, she exclaimed,

"Alan! You're up!" and hugged him. The tawny-haired youth was amazed at how enthusiastic J was to see him, yet so gentle and mindful of his injuries in the embrace.

"Hey, J," Alan said when she released him.

"Hey Alan. How are you feeling?" Alan grinned,

"Better. Sore and stiff, but better. I can't believe it—Coach found my Mom! My father said that she was dead, but she isn't! I'm gonna get to see her soon, and I'm gonna live with her!" J smiled,

"Yeah, I heard. That's great." But the smile never quite reached J's eyes. Alan sobered,

"What's wrong, J?" The hazel eyed youth paused before answering. When she did speak, Alan could hear the hurt in her voice and see it in her eyes.

"Why didn't you tell us, Alan? We could have helped you so much sooner, then you wouldn't be here, in a hospital." Her chin quivered, "you scared me to death. I knew something was wrong, I could sense it. Then there you were…lying in your own blood. So still that for a second I thought you were dead…before I saw you breathe. I've never been more scared in my life." J broke off as a few tears spilled through her eyes. Alan gingerly wrapped his arms around her, then relaxed as she softly lay her head (mindful of any bruises) on his shoulder.

After a moment, Alan could feel tears leak onto his (hospital) gown. "I'm so sorry, J. I don't know what I was thinking. I just…I didn't want to worry anyone, especially you. I know that it sounds dumb considering the circumstances, but that's what I was thinking. And I know that you're especially upset that I didn't tell you. I…I just didn't want you to worry. I know that you'd be hurt that I didn't tell you from the beginning, and…"

J pulled away so that she could face Alan properly. "I understand. You didn't want to talk about it. Most people don't when they're being…well, I was hurt, but I understand and forgive you." Alan bit the inside of his check as a weight lifted from his shoulders, though there was still a heavy feeling inside his chest. "But you have to promise to tell me if anything like this happens again." J's eyes were serious. "Anything that really hurts you, you have to tell me about." Alan met J's gaze,

"I will." J nodded,

"Alright." She got up. "Now you need rest. I'll be back to see you tomorrow, okay?"

"Okay."

***

The day after Alan came home from the hospital, J stopped by to visit him. Alan answered the door.

"J! Hi! Come in!" J smiled and hugged Alan, then followed him inside.

"Hey Alan. How are you doing?" All of a sudden, Alan's mother burst into the room.

"I heard the door—who's this? I thought I told you that you needed to rest today." Alan stammered as he explained,

"This is J, Mom. She's my best friend along with Gerry." Alan's mother squinted at J, her face slowly giving way to slight recognition.

"My, my…could this be the Julie that Alan used to play with?" J winced at the name Julie.

"Yes I am, Ms. Sydney. But please, call me J." Ms. Sydney was appalled,

"Whatever for? Julianna is a beautiful name. I do not understand why you prefer something as coarse and masculine as 'J'." Alan began to get a headache. There his mother went again. He knew that he wouldn't be able to explain J to his mother with her prissy ways. "And you used to be so pretty. What happened? And why are you wearing such clothing?"

J stiffened. Alan knew that it was taking every fiber of her self-control to not explode at his mother. J had a short temper, especially when it had something to do with her tomboyish-ness. J closed her eyes and released a shaky breath. Opening her eyes again, she stated,

"I'm sorry for bothering you, Ms. Sydney. I just wanted to stop by and see how Alan is doing. And you're right, he should be resting. I really should be going now." She opened the front door, which squeaked a little in protest (perhaps remembering how violently it had been opened by the same hand only a week earlier) and left.

Alan watched J's retreating figure through the window until she disappeared. His mother turned to go back into the kitchen. "Interesting girl. I don't think that you should see her anymore." A claw of ice gripped Alan's heart,

"What? But Mom, she's my best friend!"

"Well, she's not a proper young lady and I don't think that she has a good influence on you." Alan swallowed a growing lump in his throat,

"But—"

"No buts," Alan's mother commanded as she walked away. "You are not to see her anymore. End of discussion."