New chapter new chapter!!!!! I wrote this one fast because I didn't really have all that much to say, PLUS I wanted to get to the Christmas sequences ASAP if only because that's where more interesting things happen. Not that interesting things didn't happen in this chapter just… not as many. And more in the emotional area of this story.

BIG DISCLAIMER: Everything is © J.K. Rowling, excluding the now-to-be mentioned things © Me. These include Alex Kohl, Eleana Weasley(who is quite obviously Charlies' wife - I'm sure that by this time they would at least be engaged!!), and Ginny's simply SICKENING sense of humour. Heh. If you find anything else, tell me in the review, since I couldn't be bothered right now. The song at the beginning of the chapter is by Placebo, and it's called "My Sweet Prince". Fitting, nein?

Thanks again to all who have reviewed so far, but since none of you new guys have signed in (or don't have accounts here), I can't send people to go and read your stuff OR read it myself. Damn…. And I need something new to read too.

This chapter is rated R for the use of the "S" and "F" words… and for allusions to sex. But this isn't NC-17 or anything, so there is absolutely nothing graphic… really, there isn't. Just some making out, is all. (hee hee!)

Are you ready? It's time to descend into CHAPTER SEVEN of the strange, the downright crazy…

playground love.

***

Chapter Seven

"Desire"

Never thought you'd make me perspire

Never thought I'd do you the same

Never thought I'd fill with desire

Never thought I'd feel so ashamed.

Holidays were fast approaching. Ginny was only back at school for two days before it was all over again, and some part of her was both rejoicing and saddened by the prospect of more time away from school. More time to deliberate, I guess… or to procrastinate. Only that morning Ron had received word that the last resort for a Christmas at home were Fred and George, since their parents were travelling to Romania to visit Charlie and Eleana, and would not be returning home until mid-January. Ron had scoffed at the thought of Christmas with Fred and George - "Prob'ly just try and kill us with an exploding turkey or something, then expect me to clean it all up. Dumb gits." - and the decision to spend the holidays at Hogwarts had been made.

It was later that afternoon, while Ginny was sitting alone in the common room - everybody else was outside having snowball fights, something which, due to her stint in the hospital wing, Ginny was denied this Christmas - when Harry came and sat down right beside her.

"Hello."

Ginny was startled, if not a little uncomfortable by Harry's closeness. "Hi."

"Why aren't you outside with all the others?"

She rolled her eyes. "Doctor's orders." Ginny smiled softly at Harry in a way that made his palms sweat. "Besides, I could ask you the same question."

"What?" he asked, taken aback. She nodded towards the window. "Oh… yeah…" Harry pointed towards his right knee. "Practice. Pomfrey said I gotta stay off it for a few days."

Ginny pursed her lips. "Well, aren't we a delightful bunch of invalids?!"

Harry giggled nervously. "I guess so."

They sat there for a moment, both so incredibly conscious of the other that neither dared to move, even to breathe in the other's presence. Ginny felt Harry's thigh pressed up against her own, and in a strange twist of circumstance her stomach churned over to release a new, fresh batch of butterflies. She gasped inwardly at the many memories that flooded over her as the cobwebs faded and the cocoons crumbled to dust. The Chamber of Secrets… the way he looked at me when he saw me with Neville at the Yule Ball… that stupid valentine… so many summers… all wrapped up in wisps of green and blue.

She glanced up quickly at Harry again and saw that he was staring off into the distance, his eyes still that same emerald green. What a constant to have in the world, Ginny thought, Maybe this is the epiphany I've been waiting for. Maybe my future is all wrapped up in wisps of Harry Potter just like my past.

Harry noticed Ginny staring up at him and turned just in time to see her look away. He saw that her cheeks had turned slightly pink and smothered a grin at the thought. Feeling as if someone had handed him a brand new burst of confidence, Harry broke the silence.

"So, Gin…"

"Yeah?" She nearly slapped herself for responding so quickly. She sounded so… weak, so needy. Ginny felt vulnerable and she wondered exactly what Harry was about to ask her.

"You staying for the holidays?"

What disappointment. Ginny nodded reluctantly. "Yeah. Ron wasn't game enough to tempt Fred and George's offer of Christmas dinner."

Harry laughed loudly. "I don't blame him. I wouldn't trust them near anything flammable, edible or chemical. I mean, you'd either end up poisoned, with a gigantic body part…"

"… Or turn into some sort of animal, preferably an embarrassing one."

"Exactly."

A thought occurred to Ginny and she began to giggle under her breath. Harry raised his eyebrows, perplexed, and she continued to laugh harder. After a little while, Harry asked:

"What?"

Ginny managed to subdue herself slightly. "Nothing… I'm just being disgusting."

Now Harry's interest was piqued. "So… go on?"

"Uh…" She giggled loudly once more before continuing. "Well, in Ron's case, maybe if he got himself a bigger body part maybe he'd be able to hang on to Hermione."

It took Harry a moment to catch on, but once he recognised the double entendre he also started to laugh, against his better judgement. "You, Gin," he muttered between sniggers, "are a very naughty girl."

Ginny grinned flirtatiously. "And you, Mr. Potter, are an angelic little boy whom I have decided is my corruption of choice for these Christmas holidays."

"Then, Miss. Weasley, it is imperative that you accompany me to the annual Yule Ball - if only so to debauch me further, and to do so publicly, nonetheless."

Ginny was startled. She sat in shock for a moment, her mouth hanging open in a slightly perturbed fashion, before glancing at Harry in confusion. "You - Harry Potter - want me - Ginny Weasley - to go with you to the Yule Ball?"

Harry nodded. "Of course. Why else did you think I was here?"

Oh, I don't know… maybe to enjoy the pleasure of my company. A sick feeling replaced the previous elation and the brightly-coloured stomach butterflies grew grey and listless.

Harry pressed Ginny further. "So, will you go with me?" His tone was light; yet there was a thinly veiled urgency beneath it.

Ginny didn't know what to say, so she said nothing. Staring down at her second-hand robes, she spotted a loose strand and pulled it, unraveling a small amount of the material. Twirling the cotton around her index finger, she mulled over the question in her mind. Should I go with him? Or should I wait for… no one? End up with Neville, same as every other year, hoping to lose him on the dance floor? Or should I take this chance - however innocent it might be - and try with Harry. Yes, I should. But there was another nagging voice in the back of her mind, one which reminded her that while she still had feelings for Harry, most of them were simply shadows of her previous affection. That voice dared to ask: What about Alex?

She wrapped the cotton tighter around her fingers, not noticing her fingertips darken with red blood. Ginny clenched her hands in her frustration, causing herself to yelp in pain as the string cut into her fingers. Harry stared at her, eyes narrowed in concern, and a line of determination set in Ginny's mouth. As far as Alex is concerned, I really don't care.

With a small smile to herself, Ginny looked right into Harry's perfectly green eyes and said: "Yes, Harry. I'd love to."

***

"Do you really have to leave?" Alex was breathless as he and Hermione parted, his face flushed and her lips blood red. Hermione nodded wistfully, and Alex grasped her hands sharply. "Please, stay. I need you here."

She laughed. "Why, Alex? Is the prospect of being alone over the holidays too difficult to bear?"

Alex feigned offence. "Well, if that's the way you feel…" He released her from his grip and stood, striding over towards the doorway, just slow enough that he knew she would call out before he left the room, and just quickly enough to seem seriously insulted.

Hermione jumped to her feet and raced after him, pausing only to kiss him hurriedly on the lips. "You know I'm joking."

He sighed. "And you know that I'm not." Alex swept his hand to his forehead in mock horror. "Oh, my darling, being without you would be too, too horrible to bear. I should never sleep at nights, or wake in the day. I would be like an eternal zombie, pining for your love…"

Hermione couldn't help but laugh at Alex's theatrics. "Oh, you're such a drama queen!"

Alex looked dismayed. "I resent that remark."

Raising her eyebrows, Hermione leaned forward and whispered in his ear: "And I don't care."

"Fine." Alex reached down and grabbed her around the waist. Hermione squealed as he lifted her up and put her down on the other side of him. "See you later."

Hermione groaned. "Come back, Alex. I don't understand why you're getting so upset."

He turned towards her, his eyes full of suppressed pain. "Why? Because I'm not going to see the woman that I love for two weeks. Is that good enough?"

Hermione said nothing for a moment, slightly taken aback by the statement. She finally opened her mouth and said: "The woman you… love?"

"Yes."

Explosions went off in Hermione's head but, to her surprise, many of them sounded like warning bells. Don't… believe… someone… you don't even know. Others reminded her of how unstable her life was becoming at the moment. How can you deal with this right now? It's your seventh year, your most important one of all, and you're dallying around with some loser like this! N.E.W.T.S. are more important than this! Study is more important than this! But the one that heralded its message like a foghorn over all the others hit her hardest of all. At least he had the guts to tell you how he feels… unlike Ron.

It was that last thought that changed Hermione's mind forever. Taking Alex's face in her hands, she pulled him towards her and kissed with an intensity that made his stomach drop to his knees. Her feet guided him as the passion behind her mouth increased, and soon Alex found himself on a hidden sofa, concealed in a shadowy corner of the Gryffindor common room, Hermione briefly separating their embrace as she lay back among the cushions, staring up at Alex, asking his permission without words. His blue eyes looked back at her severely, berating her in his mind while his body was encouraging her. Alex couldn't stop himself from lowering himself on top of her and kissing her softly on the lips, and slowly running his fingertips down her side, resting them at her thigh. Hermione breathed heavily as he did this, and Alex could feel her pulse quicken underneath the skin as he brushed his lips carefully over her smooth neck. He raised his other hand to brush a strand of fluffy brown hair away from her forehead, and Hermione sighed brokenly. He paused for a moment, and as he stared down at her, Alex knew that now was not the right time for this to happen.

Hermione's eyes flickered open and she saw Alex sitting at the opposite end of the sofa, staring at the portrait hole. She pushed herself up quickly, frightened that someone might have discovered them, but saw no one. The common room was empty. Crawling over to Alex, she placed her hand on his shoulder and he glanced at her momentarily before returning his gaze to the portrait hole.

"What's wrong?" she entreated, her brown eyes full of concern.

"We can't do this." He continued to stare at the wall. "Not now. Not in the common room with someone about to walk in at any moment."

Hermione smiled wickedly. "Then let's go upstairs to the dormitory. Parvati and Lavender are out with Seamus, so we'll be all - "

"No." Alex's voice contained a kind of finality in it that shocked Hermione, and she slumped back into the sofa dejectedly.

"Why?"

He sighed. "Just because."

"That's not an answer."

Alex paused before responding. "I know. But that's all I can say right now."

A touch of anger sparked in Hermione's voice. "Really? From the man who is supposed to be in love with me?!"

His gaze flickered back to Hermione and he smiled weakly. "I'm sorry. I hope you have a good holiday… and we'll talk more about this when you get back." With that, Alex stood and walked to the portrait hole, Hermione seated in disgust behind him.

As the portrait swung open to let Alex through, Hermione jumped to her feet and yelled: "Fine! Don't tell me anything, Alex! But don't expect me to wait around for you anymore! I'm sick of this shit… I'm sick of this relationship, and I'm especially sick of you and all your fucking secrets! It's over, you hear me?!"

Alex shook his head in silence and stepped through the portrait hole without responding. The hole closed behind him, and Hermione felt tears spring to her eyes. Bastard! She thought viciously, but her anger was nothing compared to the pain she felt in her chest. Sinking back into the sofa, she realised that it didn't matter what she did, or what she said, that these next two weeks were probably going to be the most painful of her entire life. Her heart felt as if it had been ripped into pieces…

And he had kept every single one.

***

The train whistled loudly as Hermione dragged her trunk along the slushy ground, struggling with the weight of it. Harry appeared from behind her and grabbed the other handle, and she smiled thankfully up at him. He puffed loudly as he helped her lift it into the carriage and slide it inside, his cheeks pink from the exertion.

Harry shook his mittened finger at her mockingly. "I'm guessing you took the entire library home these holidays, Hermione - if you don't get the highest test score ever achieved in the N.E.W.T.S. I think I'll have to make a complaint."

Hermione grinned widely. "You really think I've got a chance of doing that well?"

"Actually, I just don't want to put up with you whingeing about not getting 567% on the whole exam!" He laughed as Hermione moved to slap him but missed, sending herself careening halfway down the platform, crashing straight into Ron who groaned heavily.

"Don't ever think of taking up ballet, Herm - I don't think the Hamlet's of the world would survive."

Rolling her eyes, Hermione replied: "Well, I think they'd do just fine, since 'Hamlet' is a Shakespearean Play, not a ballet." Before Ron could retaliate she had danced over to Ginny, and the two of them had begun to tango up and down the station, startling many of the first years in the process.

Harry smothered a laugh as Ron looked on in amazement. "I think she got you there, Ronniekins."

Ronniekins scowled. "Careful, Potty, or I just might have to smash your face in." As he saw Harry's expression change to one of annoyance, the train whistled once more and the conductor began to wave at people to board the train. Hermione and Ginny finished their tango with a tasteful dip and, receiving minimal applause, decided dancing was probably not their undiscovered talent. They rushed over to where Harry and Ron stood, and Hermione smiled at them.

"Well, I guess I'll see you guys in two weeks." Hermione giggled. "Joking, guys! Joking!" She pulled Ginny into a hug, and the younger girl pressed a folded piece of paper into her hand as they separated. Hermione looked at her questioningly but Ginny ignored her glance, so she simply slid the letter into the pocket of her robes for the moment.

Turning to Harry and Ron, she smiled broadly and kissed Harry quickly on the cheek, something which Ron avoided, a suspicious red tinge creeping over his cheeks. Hermione climbed up into the carriage and reached down to move her trunk, which she realised now wouldn't budge. Teach me to take so many books home, I guess. She saw someone leap up into the carriage behind her, and she was about to scold them for being so inconsiderate - to a Prefect, nonetheless! - when she saw that it was Ron. Without a word he pulled her trunk into the nearest compartment, and pushed it underneath the seat so that it wouldn't get in her way.

Hermione stood at the end of the passage feeling rather useless, and she felt her face grow warmer as Ron approached. She closed her eyes, thinking of all the incredibly romantic things which could possibly occur right at that moment, but the only thing she felt on her face was a slight breeze as Ron swept past her and back to the entrance of the train. She opened her eyes again and saw him standing there, a bemused smile on his face. Hermione felt her blood boil slightly at the look he gave her, and she was about to open her mouth and say something about it when Ron spoke first.

"Have a good Christmas." Ron leaned forward and kissed Hermione on the cheek, lingering long enough for her to allow a tingly feeling to creep its way up her back. "And I think you'd be great as Ophelia, or whatever," he added in a whisper. As Ron jumped down from the carriage and backed away, a shy grin on his freckled face, a little seed of doubt sprouted - and she wondered if she had been wrong about Ronald Weasley.

"I'll try," she mouthed, and a soft smile was exchanged between them. Hermione waved madly at the rest of her friends who returned the sentiment, Harry shouting something about not doing too much homework, Ginny smiling and pointing to the letter she had handed her earlier, and Ron simply standing there, staring after her in such a way that made her heart constrict.

The only thing that spoiled the moment was the absence of one - of Alex. Hermione had not been expecting him to come and say goodbye after their argument the day before, but some part of her - probably the romantic part - had been hoping for it. She sighed as she saw her friends become ants on a distant platform, and she returned to her compartment, her mind too tired to think anymore. She fell asleep almost immediately, knowing only that at the end of the line two weeks of sanity awaited her.

***

"Is she gone?"

Ginny jumped at the voice, and Alex emerged from the shadows of late afternoon sunlight. "How - did you -?"

"Lavender let me in." He paused for a moment, then asked again: "Is she gone?"

She nodded. "The train left an hour ago."

Alex pursed his lips. "I heard the whistle, but I wasn't sure… I thought she might…"

Ginny shook her head. "No. She's on her way home now."

"Well, of course. I know that now."

They stood there awkwardly for a moment, until Ginny broke the silence. "So, are you going to the Yule Ball?"

Alex's head jerked towards her suddenly. His gaze was electric and Ginny felt slightly uncomfortable, wishing she hadn't introduced the subject. "I dunno," he said simply. "Depends whether I find someone to go with or not."

Ginny looked away, out the window and into the blank whiteness of the snow. "Do you have any ideas…"

"Will you go with me, Gin?" Sensing her discomfort, Alex mistook it for repercussions of the night in the Forbidden Forest. "I mean, just as friends, of course… we'd have fun, Gin, wouldn't we?"

He sounded flustered, if not a little embarrassed, and Ginny had no idea what to say. After a moment, she decided to be direct and simply respond: "I can't. I'm going with someone else."

Alex exhaled slowly. "Who?"

"I'm going with Harry."

He felt as if the world had suddenly spun out of control; as if left had become right and up became down. Alex felt perspiration form on his brow, and it seemed in this new, uncertain world as if his body would eventually melt into one giant pool in the middle of the dormitory. Harry's words came rushing back to him, in a giant jumble of letters, but his mind rearranged them into one coherent sentence: "Keep away from Ginny, and make me happy."

Alex felt nauseous, and he rushed quickly to the door, attempting to quell his urge to throw up. Ginny watched him, and asked worriedly if he was feeling alright. Shaking his head vehemently, he wrenched open the dormitory door and rushed through it, slamming it behind him so hard that the walls shook. He leant up against the wall nearby, breathing heavily, his mind a mess and his body ready to collapse.

"Breathe," he murmured to himself, "just breathe."

He heard a noise from behind him and stumbled down the stairwell. He didn't stop running until he reached the outside of the castle and fell to the ground, gagging and coughing into the cold, clean snow. Alex rolled around in it, not wanting to live any more, only wanting to rid himself of the sinking feeling in his stomach that told him that because he had agreed to Harry's terms - because he had valued his own happiness above his best friend's - she would be the one to suffer.

He hated himself because he now realised that he loved Ginny more than a reputation, more than his popularity… more than life itself.

***

Yeah, I know that was boring but it had to be written… and so must your review!! So please, let me know on a SCALE OF 1 : 100 exactly how boring this chapter was, and write a review too. You know you want too……………..